Divorce after get citizenship (Please read before judging)

[Free Man 115]

I got my citizenship last year in October through Marriage.  Last month i.got promoted and now make double what my wife makes. 

Unfortunately, my wife decided to leave her job and for the last few weeks, I have been paying all the bills and this is too much. I have complained but to no avail. 

Am grateful to my wife because I got citizenship through her but the truth is I cannot continue paying the bills 100%. 

Things are not looking good and am thinking of divorce.  This is a hard decision for me and I know she may feel that I used her for papers but that is not true. If she decide to get a job and help with the bills am ready to stay in the Marriage. 

My heart is bleeding as am writing this. We bought a house and bought 2 vehicles together. 

 

Things are not looking good. Should we be divorce,  I don't wanna around . Am a stronger believer in marriages. 

Should our marriage end, I wanna look for a wife to continue my life. However am not sure where on earth my next wife might come from.

 

My question is  should my new wife be out of status or outside of the US, am I eligible to petition for her since am already a US citizen without any issue? 

[SalishSea 16,853]

8 minutes ago, Free Man said:

My question is  should my new wife be out of status or outside of the US, am I eligible to petition for her since am already a US citizen without any issue? 

Wow.

 

Sounds like you have already got someone new lined up.  

 

I suspect that your wife WILL think you used her for a green card which led to citizenship, and I also suspect she'd be correct.

 

Imma do a Mike E here, ciao.

[TBoneTX 43,410]

Why are you jumping this far ahead when marriage counseling is the next logical step?

[Boiler 43,692]

The chance of that happening are not very high, so not something to worry about now.

[Sam Burns 108]

Yes you’re eligible but my god, this is pretty cold blooded. Sounds like you’ve got one foot out the door already. Why not work on your relationship issues?

[PaulaCJohnny 712]

So, let me see if I understood well:

you love your wife too much that your hurt is bleeding for writing those things but you being the sole provider is enough for your to ask for divorce? 

How would you feel if was the opposite?

If this happen in my marriage I would discuss and find a way together, but loving a person and not be ok to be a provider is really weird for me. 

So, let’s say if she was the one getting more money and you could not find a job, a divorce would sound a reasonable solution for you?

 

Like @Jorgedig … WOW 

 

This really doesn’t sound like this is the only reason for the divorce. Be honest with you and with her, will be easier.

Edited January 16, 2023 by PaulaCJohnny

[Free Man 115]

The only reason is She quit her job because according to her, she don't like the job. That's is okay. But the issue is I cannot continue paying all the bills, I told her to find a different job. 

 

Just to be clear, I have no issue if she tries to find a job, I understand it can take time, my issue is she not making any attempt at all.

[Free Man 115]

20 minutes ago, Sam Burns said:

Yes you’re eligible but my god, this is pretty cold blooded. Sounds like you’ve got one foot out the door already. Why not work on your relationship issues?

I now work 7 days a week to pay our bills. I recommended seeing a therapist she refused. So yes am very frustrated 

[TBoneTX 43,410]

43 minutes ago, Free Man said:

I understand it can take time, my issue is she not making any attempt at all.

Maybe she needs time to recover from a toxic job.  Perhaps help her to find a low-stress part-time job, at least for now.

[SalishSea 16,853]

1 hour ago, Free Man said:

The only reason is She quit her job because according to her, she don't like the job. That's is okay. But the issue is I cannot continue paying all the bills, I told her to find a different job. 

 

Just to be clear, I have no issue if she tries to find a job, I understand it can take time, my issue is she not making any attempt at all.

Not a good reason to already be already seeking out and planning to petition a new wife.  Loving spouses try to help each other during times of turmoil or stress.  

[SalishSea 16,853]

57 minutes ago, Free Man said:

I now work 7 days a week to pay our bills. I recommended seeing a therapist she refused. So yes am very frustrated 

All of us who did a K-1 had a period of time where we were the sole breadwinner of the household.  You get through it together.

 

Perhaps instead of focusing on finding a new wife, you should look to bettering your financial situation via education or increased skills.  Or live within your means.  

[Family 3,549]

2 hours ago, Free Man said:

my wife decided to leave her job and for the last few weeks

It’s  an unfortunate reality both in Senegal and here that most women earn less than men..nonetheless congratulations on your promotion. ..bringing in double what she was making still leaves you financially safe ...but your marriage is definitely in trouble. 
 

Maybe your wife feels secure enough to take a step back and look for work she enjoys . 

 

Maybe she feels that if you could take a month off and visit Senegal last year..she can take a month or two off. Did she go with you?

 

https://www.cnbc.com/2019/05/25/my-wife-and-i-have-been-married-50-years-and-we-have-never-fought-about-money-once.html
My wife and I have been married 50 years, and we’ve never had a single fight about money—here’s our secret
 

[nastra30 2,041]

Op, you need to talk to your wife at a much deeper level than just look for another job. There could some underlining issue for all this. Maybe she's mentally fatigued, maybe is physically stressed and just needs a break, maybe she just doesn't want to work as you've said, etc. But you guys need to talk at more emotional level. Do you guys have kids together?

[bakphx1 785]

How long has she been out of work?  Is she looking?  If she seems uninterested in working, I will be unlike the others and say your instincts may be right.  I have seen this problem before and there’s never a good outcome.  If it’s been a very short time, that’s one thing but if she seems to be fine letting you pay for everything, she may never look.  
 

As far as another wife-no one said being single is bad.  At least for a while.  I would just take of myself first and not worry about marrying until you have found someone you like.

[carmel34 3,533]

8 hours ago, Free Man said:

Things are not looking good. Should we be divorce,  I don't wanna around . Am a stronger believer in marriages. 

Should our marriage end, I wanna look for a wife to continue my life. However am not sure where on earth my next wife might come from.

 

My question is  should my new wife be out of status or outside of the US, am I eligible to petition for her since am already a US citizen without any issue?

Seems like you're getting ahead of yourself, asking whether or not you are eligible to petition for a new foreign wife when you are still married to your current one.  Of course any US citizen can petition for a spouse, that's the law.  Whether the process is smooth or rough however, depends on the circumstances.  In your case, the timing of your naturalization, separation/divorce, relationship with a new love interest abroad, and eventual engagement/marriage and petition filing, could lead to a great deal of scrutiny.  So tread lightly and take your time, don't rush into a new relationship.  A word of warning:  if you already have someone in mind, from your home country, and have started a relationship with her, either in person or online, this would likely be discovered in the immigration/adjustment of status process and your US citizenship, granted through your current (bona fide) marriage relationship, could be revoked.