waiting another 6 months to see fiance

[mandajoy98 68]

There is a time in everyone's long distance journey where someone sacrifices something in order to be together long term.

 

DISCLAIMER: I apologize in advance if I sound whiny or complain too much but I just thought I would express my raw feelings on the first morning of 2020.

 

My fiance and I have came to harsh reality that we might not see each other for another six months. His interview is scheduled on Feb 5th but his sisters wedding is on June 29th (in AUS) leaving us no time to get accepted for a green card or advance parole in time to go back to Australia for the wedding. We both know it is the mature decision for him to stay in Australia even after the interview and wedding. This has been extremely hard because I know this is the right decision in the long run but I am having such a hard time dealing with it in the short run. This decision took me awhile to process last night but hit me so hard this morning and couldn't stop crying if I tried. Anyone in long distance knows how hard it is to be apart for so long, but today it just hit me like a ton of bricks.I know our relationship is very strong and will not break within this waiting period but I cant help but feel depressed at the fact I was counting down until February to possibly see him and now I may have to wait until June. I work and go to school full time so it so hard to drop everything and fly to Australia like I wish I could.

 

We have been doing long distance for almost 2 years now and I dont know how to cope with it anymore (other than staying busy like I am now). I feel so drained and hopeless and cant seem to go on with my day without crying or getting out of bed. If anyone has any advise on this situation it would really benefit because we both feel helpless. 

[Sunny_Skies 22]

I know exactly how this feels. My fiancé and I were together for 2 1/2 years BEFORE we ever met for the first time. That is significantly longer than it takes for most couples. We also had to wait until we were together for almost 5 to do the paperwork. The long distance doesn't bother me quite as much as it does others because I really don't know anything else. But I get it. It IS hard. The only reason I took my job was so I could make enough of money to support him and get a place to live close to where I work. The job is awful and I despise it, and I despise living so close to people I grew up with. But I can't leave and start my life over somewhere else until he is here because a) I need another income and b) I don't want to spend money on going back to school/moving when it could pay for immigration. This has caused many arguments between us and made me resent the long distance. But I hang on knowing that in time, we can things better for both of us. There will be a time when you look back on this period and it is nothing but a memory that doesn't matter

[JFH 12,189]

Why not postpone the interview and he visits you beforehand? 

 

This is one reason why you couldn’t have paid me enough to do a K-1. Had you done a CR-1, he could come when his visa was issued and left in June for the wedding with no repercussions but that’s too late now. Might be useful food for thought for readers still wondering which option to go with. The K-1 is not the best choice for the vast majority of VWP nationals. 

[AGF 146]

I feel you guys.. had the same situation last year and the first 3 quarters of this year. My husband ( then fiancé when he visited me ) went to my home country in May 2018, and we didn’t see each other again until I came here in the US last Sept 2019 through my K1 visa. That’s a solid 16 months of being physically apart. I would have gladly given up everything if I could have visited him, but alas, my tourist visa was denied, and he couldn’t visit me again because of his job.. so we had to endure 16 months of separation. We talked as much as we can every single day ( during our breaks from work which is also difficult cause we had different time zones), emailed each other, took photos of each other and send to one another, share what we were doing on a given time, what we had for breakfast, lunch and dinner, what movie we were seeing, etc etc. All the things that a “normal” couple would do because at that point , that was the only thing that we can do. You will get through this.. when you really love someone, no distance can stop you from growing closer together. Cliche I know, but it’s true.. the reward is so great: to be with him permanently. You can get through this. Keep busy, keep communicating as much as you can. Before you know it, June will be here.. good luck on your journey! 😊

[Boiler 43,393]

Presumably you can visit Australia.

 

If I was the Sister I would tell him to go and if he can not make it back so be it.

[Dale. 264]

Advice is not easy on this one as everyone deals differently.  I've known my partner 13 years.  Officially a relationship for two.  Met for the first time a year ago.  Applied for k1 start of june 2019.  210 days still waiting for Noa2.  Early december we decided the waiting was torture and I booked a flight to the usa in Feb for a visit.  We still have no idea when or if we will get the Noa2 but we are hopeful.  

 

All I can say to you is find the date.  The date he comes to you?  Or the next time you see him.  Hold on to that.  Keep busy and focus on that.  There is always something to look forward to, you just have to find it.  

[Crazy Cat 39,183]

What will he do if his visa is issued, and it has an expiration date prior to June 29th?

[Zaraliaya 122]

1 hour ago, Dale. said:

Advice is not easy on this one as everyone deals differently.  I've known my partner 13 years.  Officially a relationship for two.  Met for the first time a year ago.  Applied for k1 start of june 2019.  210 days still waiting for Noa2.  Early december we decided the waiting was torture and I booked a flight to the usa in Feb for a visit.  We still have no idea when or if we will get the Noa2 but we are hopeful.  

 

All I can say to you is find the date.  The date he comes to you?  Or the next time you see him.  Hold on to that.  Keep busy and focus on that.  There is always something to look forward to, you just have to find it.  

Uh, if I were you, I'd probably check into why yours is taking so long (if you haven't already). They're in the middle of doing the people who applied in September..you should have gotten your NoA2 by now.

 

[Dale. 264]

12 minutes ago, Zaraliaya said:

Uh, if I were you, I'd probably check into why yours is taking so long (if you haven't already). They're in the middle of doing the people who applied in September..you should have gotten your NoA2 by now.

 

Thank you, I know why there is a delay as it was transferred.  I'm not the only June or july filer waiting.  

Edited January 1, 2020 by Dale.

[mandajoy98 68]

2 hours ago, Sunny_Skies said:

I know exactly how this feels. My fiancé and I were together for 2 1/2 years BEFORE we ever met for the first time. That is significantly longer than it takes for most couples. We also had to wait until we were together for almost 5 to do the paperwork. The long distance doesn't bother me quite as much as it does others because I really don't know anything else. But I get it. It IS hard. The only reason I took my job was so I could make enough of money to support him and get a place to live close to where I work. The job is awful and I despise it, and I despise living so close to people I grew up with. But I can't leave and start my life over somewhere else until he is here because a) I need another income and b) I don't want to spend money on going back to school/moving when it could pay for immigration. This has caused many arguments between us and made me resent the long distance. But I hang on knowing that in time, we can things better for both of us. There will be a time when you look back on this period and it is nothing but a memory that doesn't matter

Throughout this process, the long distance has gotten to me because it was all i knew, but now its another degree when i hear how disappointed my fiance is about this entire situation. Thank you for the encouragement. 

[mandajoy98 68]

2 hours ago, Boiler said:

Presumably you can visit Australia.

 

If I was the Sister I would tell him to go and if he can not make it back so be it.

I am strongly considering to go back during my spring break and take off work since I am bartender and can be somewhat flexible. My fiance however wants me to stay in Australia again from May-June which I would love to do, but my parents have planned a 2 week vacation in Florida and dont know how to break it to them because they would be very opposed of me leaving. Its a sticky situation.

[mandajoy98 68]

2 hours ago, Dale. said:

Advice is not easy on this one as everyone deals differently.  I've known my partner 13 years.  Officially a relationship for two.  Met for the first time a year ago.  Applied for k1 start of june 2019.  210 days still waiting for Noa2.  Early december we decided the waiting was torture and I booked a flight to the usa in Feb for a visit.  We still have no idea when or if we will get the Noa2 but we are hopeful.  

 

All I can say to you is find the date.  The date he comes to you?  Or the next time you see him.  Hold on to that.  Keep busy and focus on that.  There is always something to look forward to, you just have to find it.  

I am so sorry to hear, I hope things start moving faster for yall! But i am such an advocate for holding onto that one date and looking forward to it, and I guess that concept has lost its value because we plan all these dates and they never seem to follow through. I hope to see him maybe in march during my spring break but who knows!

[Quarknase 1,072]

Not wanting to sound harsh, but if the sisters wedding and your families Florida trip have priority, then you two made decisions but had options. I understand that long distance is hard (I'm in the same situation, as are most of us here), but we all sacrifice one way or the other.

I am sacrificing all family visits and trips to other places, to spend all my time with my husband. Why? Because the long distance situation is temporary and once we're together there will be room again for visiting other people

 

Have you thought of delaying the interview so he can come visit as a tourist?

 

Keep your head up - the long stretch is behind you, summer is almost here

 

[Rob Beri 68]

4 hours ago, Dale. said:

Advice is not easy on this one as everyone deals differently.  I've known my partner 13 years.  Officially a relationship for two.  Met for the first time a year ago.  Applied for k1 start of june 2019.  210 days still waiting for Noa2.  Early december we decided the waiting was torture and I booked a flight to the usa in Feb for a visit.  We still have no idea when or if we will get the Noa2 but we are hopeful.  

 

All I can say to you is find the date.  The date he comes to you?  Or the next time you see him.  Hold on to that.  Keep busy and focus on that.  There is always something to look forward to, you just have to find it.  

How come you have not received your NOA 2 yet. Most come within 90-120 days. It seems a unusual.

[Dale. 264]

I did not mean to take over this thread.  I simply wanted to offer support to the OP.  As the delays and wait can be very hard.  

 

@Rob Beri most noa2s come thru within that time frame but not all.  There are still june, july, august filers still waiting.  Every case is different.  Unfortunately our case is one of them