I don't know where to begin

[coforever 40]

14 minutes ago, quisha said:

Yes exactly, this is huge. We get along beautifully on the phone but it could very well change in person. I do worry that Gambia will be more strict on allowing him to eventually leave the country and come here. 

Gambia will be strict? How?  I guess you meant to say the US embassy? Because a country can't stop her citizen from travelling as long as they have the appropriate travel document to that country.

[Quimat 154]

9 minutes ago, coforever said:

Gambia will be strict? How?  I guess you meant to say the US embassy? Because a country can't stop her citizen from travelling as long as they have the appropriate travel document to that country.

I’m new to this. So yes, I meant the US embassy. 

[JFH 12,189]

Build up as much time together as you can before you file anything. Keep evidence of your trips. Boarding passes, passport stamps, etc. If he can’t come here to visit have a look at countries he could travel to without a visa (such as The Bahamas) and spend time there too. It’s good to see how he is outside of his familiar surroundings and comfort zone. 
 

Do you have a big age difference?

[aaron2020 11,651]

Hi,

 

Go meet him and develop the relationship.

 

In order for him to visit the US, he would need a visitor visa.  With a 72% refusal rate, never having been outside his country, having a US citizen girlfriend, etc., he is unlikely to get one.

In order for him to immigrate to the US as your fiance or spouse, you will need to show a "bona fide" relationship.  This means show that the relationship is genuine and not him using you to immigrate to the US.  One visit is probably not going to do it.  You will probably need multiple visits.  This is going to be a long and exhausting road.  You are facing a high fraud country where lots of people are desperate to leave and come to the US.  This is what the US Embassy is looking for.  The more relationship evidence you have, the better.  A quick application after meeting once will make this extremely hard. 

Watch a few episodes of "90 Days Fiance" to see what others in similar situations to yours have gone through.  You can learn from their successes and avoid their failings.  

[SusieQQQ 11,585]

2 hours ago, quisha said:

I’m not sure about that because he’s never been out of his country and I have no idea how strict Gambia is. I don’t hear of many coming to America from there. 

So they have a very high rate of not allowing them to come to the USA? 😕

Yes. This generally happens when countries have seen large proportions of people making fraudulent applications to get visas and/or overstaying illegally in the US once they get there. As a single person with a girlfriend in the US, that would already make it harder anywhere - so I wouldn’t count on him being able to get a tourist visa. (Of course he can try, but be realistic about his chances.)

 

The Gambia is a tiny country with a population of 2.3 million people - not at all surprising you don’t hear of many.

 

 

Edited December 19, 2020 by SusieQQQ

[PaulaCJohnny 712]

2 hours ago, quisha said:

Yes exactly, this is huge. We get along beautifully on the phone but it could very well change in person. I do worry that Gambia will be more strict on allowing him to eventually leave the country and come here. 

The high rate is because of the amount of fraud intent in some countries. I really don't know exactly about Gambia. 

Just be careful about going to any country that you just know 1 person

 

Is there any age difference? Are you Muslim? Is he Muslim?

 

I really wish you find the love of your life like you dream of!!

 

Edited December 19, 2020 by Paula&Johnny

[SusieQQQ 11,585]

1 minute ago, Paula&Johnny said:

The high rate is because of the amount of fraud intent in some countries. I really don't know exactly about Gambia. 

Just be careful about going to any country that you just know 1 person and you don't speak the language (I guess).

 

Is there any age difference? Are you Muslim? Is he Muslim?

 

I really wish you find the love of your life like you dream!!

 

The Gambia is a former British colony. English is the official language. 

[PaulaCJohnny 712]

1 minute ago, SusieQQQ said:

The Gambia is a former British colony. English is the official language. 

Yes. I remember just a moment ago haha thanks for correct me!

[Diane and Chris 651]

As others have said, meeting is the first step. Have you talked about his family and how they feel about you coming to visit?  Do you have a passport?  Sometimes just getting a passport can take several weeks. Good luck with your ventures!  

[Orangesapples 1,954]

3 hours ago, coforever said:

Gambia will be strict? How?  I guess you meant to say the US embassy? Because a country can't stop her citizen from travelling as long as they have the appropriate travel document to that country.

Some countries do that, but thankfully, we're not talking about North Korea here. 

 

OP, make sure your kids are going to get along with their step-dad. Definitely don't rush into this. Is he much younger than you? If yes, that could make it harder to convince the embassy that your relationship is genuine but you can still do it. Just take your time 

[Adventine 3,187]

Agreed with everyone else who says to take your time and really get to know this man, before taking any concrete steps towards immigration. 

 

From my perspective, even more important, the OP needs to make sure that this man will be a good step-dad to her kids. And that can really only be gauged after they spend a significant amount of time together in person.

 

[Nat&Amy 623]

Welcome to the forum!

 

In addition to all the advice given here, also be prepared to talk about how the two of you met. One thing is to meet online when you two have interests, background and/or friends in common (happens all the time), another very different thing is a complete stranger from another country sending you a message out of nowhere. I am sure that love happens in both scenarios, but in the second one we see a lot of scams, especially on Facebook. For a spousal visa in these cases, you might be asked a considerable amount of quality evidence to show your beloved is not in it for the wrong reasons.

[Babu Frik 1,162]

It's all butterflies right now, and I don't want to say it won't work out.

But just keep in mind, our type of relationships generally progress faster than if we lived in the same place, and because of that, people don't often discover issues/differences, and it doesn't work out after getting married. So that's why it's important to try to spend as much time as possible together and get to know each other.

Even if there are issues, you can possibly work them out before they become a bigger issue.

 

Best of luck!

[JeanneAdil 6,253]

Great advice has been given from all above

but join the forum for those going thru Africa as it will give you the best place to understand the issues / the disappointed and the successful VJ members 

 

https://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/89-africa-sub-saharan/

 

I married Moroccan in 2010 and it was difficult to get his visa as Africa immigrants face many issues

1  large age gaps /over 10 years

2.  religious differences

3.  family (mainly mother) from Africa does not approve of relationship especially if woman is divorced or can not have more children

4.  Gambia is very poor ( over a third of The Gambia's population lives below the poverty line: $1.25 USD per day.)

5.  Education is not free and that means some can not afford is so think what a Gambian man would do here for work/  The cost to pay all expenses for an elementary school child for one year is only $37.50.   hard to do on $1.25 a day income

 

and read the follow site as its an eye opener

 

https://tourismteacher.com/forums/topic/gambia-romance/

 

understand that when a USC does a fiancee visa,  he/she has to support the immigrant for a considerable time as the bene can not work/ study/ or volunteer until the USC applys for the AOS after marriage (taking anywhere from 6 months to 2 years for some)

and read the costs of K1 (fiancee) compared to CR1 (spouse ) visa as CR1 is cheaper in the long run

sorry i can't remember what VJ member posts the difference 

[Quimat 154]

On 12/18/2020 at 9:32 PM, JFH said:

Build up as much time together as you can before you file anything. Keep evidence of your trips. Boarding passes, passport stamps, etc. If he can’t come here to visit have a look at countries he could travel to without a visa (such as The Bahamas) and spend time there too. It’s good to see how he is outside of his familiar surroundings and comfort zone. 
 

Do you have a big age difference?

My biggest obstacle will be getting to him, but I will do my best. There's actually a small age difference, I'm 31 and he's 27. He's never been married and has no kids. He's never asked me for anything.