i want to know my chances

[Nitas_man 3,100]

1 hour ago, Live alone said:

I pray it doesn’t get to that , each visit here in Nigeria costs out alot and I don’t make enough to support both of us here if it comes to that .. that will be a very hard decision too 

 

So you dont make enough to support both of you in Nigeria?  Begs the question:  Would you have even married her if she did not make enough to support both of you in the US and what would you do then?

 

A CO looks at the overall situation.  

 

Asked another way:  Culturally speaking would you be able to marry another Nigerian if she was expected to support you and you could not support her?

[SalishSea 16,746]

1 hour ago, Live alone said:

I pray it doesn’t get to that , each visit here in Nigeria costs out alot and I don’t make enough to support both of us here if it comes to that .. that will be a very hard decision too 

This kind of makes it sound like unless you could immigrate to the US, the marriage would be over.

[Timona 3,931]

57 minutes ago, Jorgedig said:

This kind of makes it sound like unless you could immigrate to the US, the marriage would be over.

 

That is his exact intention. He's telling it plain and in black and white.

This guy was already quick to the alter. 

 

I will bet that this is just a case of someone trying to get to the States. I am Kenyan and personally/ "Africanally",  I wouldn't marry a fellow African who's more than 5 years my age. Hell no would I then marry one who's 23 years older. It's a huge taboo to be seen in public walking around with such. If I can't walk down African streets with a fellow African wife who's 23 years older, then why is an American an exception? 

 

Sometime back, I saw an article in which a young Nigerian guy married an old British lady, someone who was older than his own grandmother. How do you shamelessly throw a wedding ceremony, sit at it, exchange vows and with a straight face claim to love someone older than your grandmother? If that's the case, why not marry your African grandmother's aunt if she's still alive? 

 

 

Edited August 4, 2019 by Timona

[Nitas_man 3,100]

2 minutes ago, Live alone said:

You are quick to judge but you are not in my heart or know what I’m thinking .. if you have nothing to contribute to the question you just scroll over and don’t add any comments okay .. thank you 

So if you are denied what is your plan

 

Is it acceptable custom in your country to marry a wife you cannot support?

Edited August 4, 2019 by Nitas_man

[Ryan H 3,790]

Moved from Progress Reports to Process & Procedures.

[Timona 3,931]

1 hour ago, Nitas_man said:

So if you are denied what is your plan

 

Is it acceptable custom in your country to marry a wife you cannot support?

 

Exactly. @missileman had asked him "Is it customary in Nigeria for a man to marry a woman 23 years older?"  a similar question and he chose to ignore it. Doubt if he'll answer yours.

 

 

 

I do not judge. I call it out plain the way it is. NEVER will an African parent allow you to marry a fellow African who's around their own age. Why would they suddenly change their stance when the person is American? Why not marry Oladipo's mom? She's single and next door. 

 

I'm out.

 

Edited August 5, 2019 by Ryan H
Reason for edit: to remove quote of removed post

[Live alone 0]

17 minutes ago, Nitas_man said:

So if you are denied what is your plan

 

Is it acceptable custom in your country to marry a wife you cannot support?

Cannot support is temporary and not permanent okay .. I asked a question about immigration procedures 

 

8 minutes ago, Timona said:

 

Exactly. @missileman had asked him "Is it customary in Nigeria for a man to marry a woman 23 years older?"  a similar question and he chose to ignore it. Doubt if he'll answer yours.

 

 

 

I do not judge. I call it out plain the way it is. NEVER will an African parent allow you to marry a fellow African who's around your own parent's age. Why would they suddenly change their stance when the person is American? 

 

Yea it happens , even here in vj , there are a lot of marriages like that too , some with much age difference than mine .. and if I’m denied my plan is to reapply with my wife and continue applying until I get approved 

Edited August 4, 2019 by Live alone

[Live alone 0]

2 hours ago, JeanneAdil said:

you will need to provide a lot of face time to overcome the age difference to prove a real realtionship

they know the marriage is real but a long term relationship is what immigration needs to feel can happen

i know as we had the same issue and it took us 6 years and 5 long trips to be approved

as to accounts:

 

she can add you to IRS tax returns at tax time in the spring by applying for the ITIN with a W7 form 

https://www.irs.gov/individuals/international-taxpayers/nonresident-alien-spouse

 

when the ITIN is granted,  she can add u to checking and / or savings account per federal tax laws (as i did for Adil 4 years before he got a visa) / you can not have a debit card for the account as you can only have that after arrival in USA

 

probably can not add you to apartment lease 

but send her a POA (power of attorney samples are online) allowing her to do banking and other issues in your name / that will help her with a lot of requirements to aide the application

Thank you 

[belinda63 2,981]

You have a lot of red flags in your case. Your wife will need to make multiple visits and stay for a while. You will need to show pictures of the two of you together with your family and friends to show they have accepted the marriage. You will have to explain why you would marry a woman who cannot give you children. Be prepared for a hard interview and a good possibility of being denied.

[Becci391 339]

Get ready for a plan B should you get denied.

[Nitas_man 3,100]

22 minutes ago, Live alone said:

Cannot support is temporary and not permanent okay .. I asked a question about immigration procedures 

 

Yea it happens , even here in vj , there are a lot of marriages like that too , some with much age difference than mine .. and if I’m denied my plan is to reapply with my wife and continue applying until I get approved 

Your immigration approval is unfortunately related to the questions that you are avoiding.  Your interview will be worse, and harsher, but this is a taste of what to expect.  You dodged questions that you cannot dodge if you hope to move forward with this.

 

On the issue of immigration procedures your thread was actually about your chances, not procedures.   

 

No need to tell me what happens here.  I have been here a long, long time.

 

So:  My answer, is that your chances are low unless you can straight face answer each one of those questions in such a way as to convince a professional officer that this is about your marriage no matter what happens, not about how much better off you will be after your visa is issued.

[Ryan H 3,790]

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[pushbrk 12,092]

1 hour ago, Nitas_man said:

Your immigration approval is unfortunately related to the questions that you are avoiding.  Your interview will be worse, and harsher, but this is a taste of what to expect.  You dodged questions that you cannot dodge if you hope to move forward with this.

 

On the issue of immigration procedures your thread was actually about your chances, not procedures.   

 

No need to tell me what happens here.  I have been here a long, long time.

 

So:  My answer, is that your chances are low unless you can straight face answer each one of those questions in such a way as to convince a professional officer that this is about your marriage no matter what happens, not about how much better off you will be after your visa is issued.

I agree.  While it is certainly true that we see these reverse age differences from Nigeria, being successful in the visa process, it is usually based on the amount of time the couple has spent in person.  Time together in person, compensates for red flags.  Bear in mind that short visits, no matter how many, are not as convincing as fewer longer visits.  

 

Answers like "It happens." are examples of dodging the real question.  The question about whether marriages with a wife being 20+ years older than the husband are culturally common in Nigeria, is clearly "NO".  To say "It happens." while true, simply dodges the question.

 

Will this case and its totality of circumstances convince a Consular Officer that the relationship is bona fide?  We don't know, and can't speculate because WE don't KNOW the totality of circumstances.  Unfortunately, the case involves Nigeria, arguably the country with the highest percentage of spouse visa cases being denied based on "for immigration purposes only" in all the world.  You could argue Ghana is very close, but that doesn't change anything.

 

That a person would not marry such a "different" (age, race, religion etc. or combination of all) person within their own culture, is not sufficient for denying.  We see young asian women marrying American men 30+ years older, where they would never marry a man from their own country that is that old, and being successful in not only getting visas but also having happy lives, every day.  

 

It comes down to the individual case.  The advice I would give the OP at this point is to get real and stay real.  When that interview date comes, BE real.  No flippant answers like "It happens."  Be ready to explain to a reasonable but sceptical person just HOW they can believe your relationship is genuine, and be prepared to back it up with actual evidence.

 

It does ZERO good to provide contrived evidence just to stack some more paper in the file.  Nobody is expecting this couple to have a joint lease or bank account.  Contriving such evidence would actually HURT the case.  

Edited August 5, 2019 by pushbrk

[Nitas_man 3,100]

Just now, pushbrk said:

 

It does ZERO good to provide contrived evidence just to stack some more paper in the file.  Nobody is expecting this couple to have a joint lease or bank account.  Contriving such evidence would actually HURT the case.  

This is 100% true and is not said enough on these boards.

[Kim and Joseph 36]

3 hours ago, pushbrk said:

I agree.  While it is certainly true that we see these reverse age differences from Nigeria, being successful in the visa process, it is usually based on the amount of time the couple has spent in person.  Time together in person, compensates for red flags.  Bear in mind that short visits, no matter how many, are not as convincing as fewer longer visits.  

 

Answers like "It happens." are examples of dodging the real question.  The question about whether marriages with a wife being 20+ years older than the husband are culturally common in Nigeria, is clearly "NO".  To say "It happens." while true, simply dodges the question.

 

Will this case and its totality of circumstances convince a Consular Officer that the relationship is bona fide?  We don't know, and can't speculate because WE don't KNOW the totality of circumstances.  Unfortunately, the case involves Nigeria, arguably the country with the highest percentage of spouse visa cases being denied based on "for immigration purposes only" in all the world.  You could argue Ghana is very close, but that doesn't change anything.

 

That a person would not marry such a "different" (age, race, religion etc. or combination of all) person within their own culture, is not sufficient for denying.  We see young asian women marrying American men 30+ years older, where they would never marry a man from their own country that is that old, and being successful in not only getting visas but also having happy lives, every day.  

 

It comes down to the individual case.  The advice I would give the OP at this point is to get real and stay real.  When that interview date comes, BE real.  No flippant answers like "It happens."  Be ready to explain to a reasonable but sceptical person just HOW they can believe your relationship is genuine, and be prepared to back it up with actual evidence.

 

It does ZERO good to provide contrived evidence just to stack some more paper in the file.  Nobody is expecting this couple to have a joint lease or bank account.  Contriving such evidence would actually HURT the case.  

How does this Hurt the Case Explain?