USC Marriage Fraud experience and what would I do different

[MeAlone 158]

This Topic is for to share our experience, many USC are suffering the Marriage Fraud, manipulation, abuse and many things more hurting us for years or for life.

 

Let's share our stories and think what could we do different based on our experience and knowledge now.

Immigrants have all the rights and protection in our country. What do we have, we US citizens? Spending a lot and making a lot of documents for to be with our loved ones. Do we deserve being used, manipulated, abused and even send to jail because of our best feelings and intentions? What kind of legal help do we have? What kind of support?

[Roel 7,191]

That's why I will always advice as much face time as possible. Possibly even living with the foreign partner in their home country for a while. That's unfortunately doesn't guarantee not being scammed but it's still the best way to truly meet someone. Gotta laugh at all those topics when USC goes on about how crazy in love they are with someone who they know through Skype only..  Anyway! 

 

Also I expect this thread to be closed soon (too much space for rants and offensive shi... stuff. ) Sorry! 

[MeAlone 158]

I disagree, some people meet and marry in 1 day and live happy forever and some have lots of time dating and divorce after a week of marriage

[MeAlone 158]

Also the people behave different when they see an American abroad, walking dollar, free meal ticket, free way to America and it cost only a nice smile and love, easy game for many of them.

 

After my experience, I would say, more face time but here, in US, not marrying so fast. Maybe the new law, not 90 days but 1 year here for a foreigner to see our country, to see both of us in the same house and decide to marry. 1 year living together can give you the idea if it works. 1 year with a work permit but no green card, AOS after 1 year together here.

[Boiler 43,430]

Often we see a certain theme, especially when going through certain Consulates.

 

So certainly you can cut down the risk by avoiding those.

Edited April 4, 2018 by Boiler

[ZA_US 27]

Honestly I don't know who would want to spend YEARS putting time and effort into coming to America unless you were really desperate or in LOVE. Life is not easy just because you live in America.

Edited April 4, 2018 by ZA_US

[Roel 7,191]

26 minutes ago, MeAlone said:

Also the people behave different when they see an American abroad, walking dollar, free meal ticket, free way to America and it cost only a nice smile and love, easy game for many of them.

 

After my experience, I would say, more face time but here, in US, not marrying so fast. Maybe the new law, not 90 days but 1 year here for a foreigner to see our country, to see both of us in the same house and decide to marry. 1 year living together can give you the idea if it works. 1 year with a work permit but no green card, AOS after 1 year together here.

Uhm no. As a foreigner I would NOT want to abandon my life, my job, etc for a whole year just to see if my relationship works out. That would be easy for USC since they are home. K1 IS 90 days for a reason. No one forces you to marry that fast but the idea is that you're suppose to get to know each other before k1 arrival. 

[MeAlone 158]

9 minutes ago, Roel said:

Uhm no. As a foreigner I would NOT want to abandon my life, my job, etc for a whole year just to see if my relationship works out. That would be easy for USC since they are home. K1 IS 90 days for a reason. No one forces you to marry that fast but the idea is that you're suppose to get to know each other before k1 arrival. 

Unfortunately we can not live abroad for 1 year either and even living there, you never know how this person will behave in America. Many are so nice in their own country but in their mind America is El Dorado and if the USC doesn't give them gold and luxury life here, he/she is a bad person and they move on thinking Americans are stupid and it is easy to find the next one but with much more money rich.

[MeAlone 158]

41 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Often we see a certain theme, especially when going through certain Consulates.

 

So certainly you can cut down the risk by avoiding those.

I wouldn't say it depends on the country, the percentage of honest people and cheaters is the same all around the world and in any country.

[MeAlone 158]

1. If you US Citizen, feel the person you married is very different coming to your house, emotionally and verbally abusive and very distant, if you feel something is wrong and instead of honey moon time it's all worse and worse, listen your guts. Watch, think, analyze and do NOT get married, or if you already did, do NOT send the AOS, or if you already did, get the InfoPass and cancel your Affidavit of Support.

 

After that divorce him/her, keep yourself at a safe distance once you start to divorce or annul your marriage, live apart or bring a roommate to be your every day witness, do not play the immigrant games about abuse, keep calm

[Corey911 37]

1 hour ago, MeAlone said:

Also the people behave different when they see an American abroad, walking dollar, free meal ticket, free way to America and it cost only a nice smile and love, easy game for many of them.

 

After my experience, I would say, more face time but here, in US, not marrying so fast. Maybe the new law, not 90 days but 1 year here for a foreigner to see our country, to see both of us in the same house and decide to marry. 1 year living together can give you the idea if it works. 1 year with a work permit but no green card, AOS after 1 year together here.

AOS itself in DFW area took us 16 months... So...

[noraliz73 243]

1 hour ago, MeAlone said:

Also the people behave different when they see an American abroad, walking dollar, free meal ticket, free way to America and it cost only a nice smile and love, easy game for many of them.

 

After my experience, I would say, more face time but here, in US, not marrying so fast. Maybe the new law, not 90 days but 1 year here for a foreigner to see our country, to see both of us in the same house and decide to marry. 1 year living together can give you the idea if it works. 1 year with a work permit but no green card, AOS after 1 year together here.

I agree that would be nice, but let the beneficiaries work.  Even qualified petitioners have bills.

[mrmvkjts 459]

It‘s about common sense in my opinion.

and that goes both ways!!

 

marriage fraud can happen both ways too. While I know thtat it‘s not as common from USC to foreigner, it still happens.

 

1 year for K1 is I think not a very smart idea because...who can afford that? financially and emotionally.

 

there is no guarantee in life,whether you marry after 268272 years of being in a relationship or if you decide to elope after one date.

 

I‘m sorry that some people havw to make the experience of marriage fraud, but not 100% avoidable. 

[Canerican 242]

1 hour ago, MeAlone said:

1. If you US Citizen, feel the person you married is very different coming to your house, emotionally and verbally abusive and very distant, if you feel something is wrong and instead of honey moon time it's all worse and worse, listen your guts. Watch, think, analyze and do NOT get married, or if you already did, do NOT send the AOS, or if you already did, get the InfoPass and cancel your Affidavit of Support.

 

After that divorce him/her, keep yourself at a safe distance once you start to divorce or annul your marriage, live apart or bring a roommate to be your every day witness, do not play the immigrant games about abuse, keep calm

Once the foreign beneficiary has their green card there is no way that you can cancel the I-864 Affidavit of Support. If you have gotten that far, your are hooked till the foreign beneficiary gets citizenship or 4 working quarters, which I believe is Ten years. If they you have only applied I believe it is a possibility. This is why you need to be sure about who you are going to be with. 

[Dianalorena 1,153]

It sucks to know that a lot use U.S citizens as green card tickets, breaking their hearts by pretending to be in love,  but to say that they have to be desperate to migrate from certain countries is a gross understatement. 

Marriage is one of the ''easiest'' (arguably)  and fastest ways to get there and apply for citizenship, escape poverty and violence.They're even protected in case they file for a divorce stating ''things just didn't work out'' and get to stay, as long as they prove it was entered in good faith. All evidence created by the spouse, inadvertently. 

 

The problem is, common sense goes out of the window when someone is feeling lonely/desperate enough. Then comes someone that tells them sweet nothings and they fall in love. They tend to ignore most red flags (high fraud country, constantly asking for money, huge age disparity, an urgency to move to the U.S, certain lies, etc) because well, they're in love. Love isn't logical. We go to great lengths and risk a lot for what we believe is real.

 

Although it's impossible to 100% determine if someone is being dishonest or using you in all cases, my recommendation is to spend as much time together as possible and be vigilant for red flags. I know it hurts to find out someone you love and trust can be scamming you,  but it's worse to find out too late.  So pay attention to other people's experiences. My husband and I had the luxury of starting our relationship in a very normal way. We dated months in person and even lived together for a little while, got engaged and then we decided to live together in the U.S, so we filed for a CR1. It's been a year and a half of long distance so far, with constant traveling to see each other. Face time is definitely important.