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Filed: Timeline

Hi, things r not going very well. We talked for 2 years before she came over here. Once here all we talked about changed. Lots of tampo and sleeping on the couch. I put off filling out the paperwork cause of this. I finally filled out the paperwork and sent it in. Since then she has joined many private online groups. Keeps her phone on private code and puts it face down. If I get close to her, she pushes the back button. She is on her phone non stop. She locks herself in the bathroom for hours on it.She walks the streets why I'm at work, sometimes for hours. I come home and she isn't there. She has thrown away all the clothes and shoes I bought her. She also threw away all r wedding pics and frames.She has been mailed so far 3 purses, perfume and bikini. She says this stuff comes from online surveys. When I ask more about it, she gets defensive. She now tells me I forced her to come to America. I don't understand that, she asked me every week to fill out paperwork when she was there. She doesn't like staying home, but also doesn't like coming to work with me. I do handyman stuff. She is bored, so I told her I would pay her to paint instead of my crew. She did it, but then called it abuse. I asked her to help me Carry in a counter top.. She called that abuse. She tells my male and female couple workers that it's abuse when there girl does work. She said cause I didn't fill out paperwork right away that it was abuse of power. I pay for everything and take her on many trips, but because I won't give her weekly allowance then that's financial abuse. These r words she doesn't know, but just as soon as she talks online to someone, these words come out. She put on Facebook about wanting a divorce, so everyone asked questions. I finally unfriended her because of all the remarks. My friends who r her friends now say she has a made up name on there.. Well she has now got her combo card a few weeks ago. I asked her if she was happy, still tampo. I ask her don't you even appreciate it. She said u was forced, u had no choice, cause if u didn't fill out paperwork I would of said you verbally abuse me and r gas lighting me. I said what? wow and what is gas lighting. I had to look it up. She said u play with paperwork and I play back harder. A few days later she said she didn't mean it and was just mad. After her saying that, I contacted a lawyer about divorce. He said we could do a simple divorce r self fast and cheap. I told her about it, she said no way. I want lawyers and will fight u to the end on divorce. Now lately she has been nice to me, but now back to tampo.. She also is very jealous of my x from 6 years ago. She tore my garage apart and found a old letter from her ten years ago and said to me u r loser cause u had failed past relationships. I said we all have, including you had two failed before me. She said no its you. She checks through all my stuff always looking for things to use against me, says I'm cheating all the time. Asks family and friends to try and get things on me. She even contacted another Filipina I was talking to when I first starting talking to her over 2 years ago. She calls that cheating too, cause I talked to her at the start of r talking too. I feel like I'm living with the enemy and somewhat trying to extort me.I tried talking to her many times, she only screams or does tampo. I tried giving tampo back, but she can last for weeks. I tried joking with her to get her out of it, but it doesn't work. She says I treat her horrible. I said, give me a example. She said cause u tell me to keep the change. When she buys something, like a snack or something and there is ten dollars change,I tell her to keep it. I have done this since she got here. She says that's abuse. She says cooking, cleaning is abuse and I need to hire a maid.

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline

Be careful what or who you want in life...you may get it.


N-400

12/30/2019  Filed N-400 online

12/30/2019  NOA1

01/09/2020  Walk in biometric set up by IO at Ft. Myers to be done at ASC Ft. Myers.  Biometric completed.  Original Biometric was scheduled for  01/23/2020.  Estimated       Case Completion time 10 months (November 2020).

 

 

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

~~Moved to Effects of Major Family Changes from the PI Regional forum ~~


Spoiler

Met Playing Everquest in 2005
Engaged 9-15-2006
K-1 & 4 K-2'S
Filed 05-09-07
Interview 03-12-08
Visa received 04-21-08
Entry 05-06-08
Married 06-21-08
AOS X5
Filed 07-08-08
Cards Received01-22-09
Roc X5
Filed 10-17-10
Cards Received02-22-11
Citizenship
Filed 10-17-11
Interview 01-12-12
Oath 06-29-12

Citizenship for older 2 boys

Filed 03/08/2014

NOA/fee waiver 03/19/2014

Biometrics 04/15/14

Interview 05/29/14

In line for Oath 06/20/14

Oath 09/19/2014 We are all done! All USC no more USCIS

 

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Pull the I-864 and move on. I'd still get her a ticket back to her home country (unless you bought a return-trip when she was coming in k1 visa).


ROC 2009
Naturalization 2010

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Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Brazil
Timeline

what is tampo?? I have never heard this word and it makes the context unable to be understood


04/19/16 PD - NOA1 (Potomac Service Center)

07/13/16 Transferred to National Benefits Center to "speed up" processing

08/06/16 Transferred to Local Field Office (Philadelphia) for Marriage Interview

10/04/16 - Congressional Inquiry

01/05/17 - Ombudsman says will receive Interview letter within 30 Days!

02/01/17 - Marriage Interview

02/02/17 - I-130 Approved!!!  :D

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline

N-400

12/30/2019  Filed N-400 online

12/30/2019  NOA1

01/09/2020  Walk in biometric set up by IO at Ft. Myers to be done at ASC Ft. Myers.  Biometric completed.  Original Biometric was scheduled for  01/23/2020.  Estimated       Case Completion time 10 months (November 2020).

 

 

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

what is tampo?? I have never heard this word and it makes the context unable to be understood

From what I understand it's a huge temper tantrum


Spoiler

Met Playing Everquest in 2005
Engaged 9-15-2006
K-1 & 4 K-2'S
Filed 05-09-07
Interview 03-12-08
Visa received 04-21-08
Entry 05-06-08
Married 06-21-08
AOS X5
Filed 07-08-08
Cards Received01-22-09
Roc X5
Filed 10-17-10
Cards Received02-22-11
Citizenship
Filed 10-17-11
Interview 01-12-12
Oath 06-29-12

Citizenship for older 2 boys

Filed 03/08/2014

NOA/fee waiver 03/19/2014

Biometrics 04/15/14

Interview 05/29/14

In line for Oath 06/20/14

Oath 09/19/2014 We are all done! All USC no more USCIS

 

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
Timeline

I am going to play devil's advocate because there are two sides to every story and this is only one. No answers required, but I wonder if you looked at it from this perspective. If you still love her and value your wife, perhaps this is how she might feel and does not know how to communicate it properly. Remember, she is coming from a different country with a different culture and traditions.

I put off filling out the paperwork cause of this. I finally filled out the paperwork and sent it in. - How long ago, has she received EAD and Advanced parole or the 2yr GC? Did you threaten to not file it??? That could be considered abuse.

She walks the streets why I'm at work, sometimes for hours. I come home and she isn't there. - Irrelevant unless she is a prisoner in your home and can only leave with you.

She doesn't like staying home, but also doesn't like coming to work with me. I do handyman stuff. She is bored, so I told her I would pay her to paint instead of my crew. - Does she have any interest in working as a painter? So if you offered to pay her, did you?

I pay for everything and take her on many trips, but because I won't give her weekly allowance then that's financial abuse. - So how do you plan to show co-mingling of assets? Why is there no account that she can draw from and needs to wait on you to pay for something or give her money?

She also is very jealous of my x from 6 years ago. - Do you pay alimony to your ex, but to not give her access to funds/allowance? I know this is a bit of a bitter pill to swallow for me, let alone my fiancee, since there is no divorce or alimony in PI.

She said cause u tell me to keep the change. When she buys something, like a snack or something and there is ten dollars change,I tell her to keep it. I have done this since she got here. - You married her, but she perceives that you are keeping control because you do not allow her access to your assets. My fiancee felt is was very insulting when I did that a couple times.

No judgement, just a different perspective. I would like to think that you both love each other, but just have not figured out how to communicate properly. I hope that you can get past this detour in your life and find a way to move forward together. If you cannot, then I hope that you can both find a way to move on with separate lives, wherever they may lead you.

Good Luck

Edited by aratamorne

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From what I understand it's a huge temper tantrum

It doesn't have to be a huge temper tantrum. It can be a tantrum over the smallest of things and the tampo could manifest itself in small ways or big ways. Behavior such as ignoring the other partner, making faces, other forms of passive-aggressive behavior, and mostly non-verbal behavior that would imply hurt or displeasure are symptoms of tampo.


Check my timeline for K-1 visa & AOS details

Conditional Permanent Resident: 16 September 2014

Conditional GC Expires: 16 September 2016

ROC Journey (CA Service Center)

2016-Sep-14: I-751 form, check, supporting docs sent USPS Priority Express

2016-Sep-15: ROC application received & signed for by Lakelieh

2016-Sep-15: NOA receipt date

2016-Sep-19: $590 check cashed by USCIS

2016-Sep-20: NOA/ 1-year extension letter received in mail

2018-Feb-26: ROC case transferred to local office

2018-Mar-06: ROC approved via USCIS website (WAC status check)

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