C-ma'am

Another issue to keep in mind is that estimated processing dates are only guesses, it is impossible to know for sure when your specific case will arrive at the consulate, an interview scheduled, visa approved, then later issued and delivered, etc...  If you've been on this site for a while, you know that making firm plans based on estimated dates is always risky.  I always say, hope for the best, but plan for the worst, that way you won't be sorry holding non-refundable airline tickets, wedding deposits, etc.  I agree with others that it is not worth taking a chance on having any kind of ceremony before traveling to the US on a K-1 as others have been refused entry for being "too married for a K-1."  I hope all goes well with your K-1 process so that you can be together in the US soon.  Good luck!

It is highly highly NOT recommended to have ANY type of ceremony before you enter on a k1. Often times this can make you “look too married” and result in a denial. If having a religious ceremony in Bolivia is important to you you should come on a k1, get married and once you have your green card or AP then go back to Bolivia to have the ceremony.

Why do not you both leave. Sounds toxic.

Oh dear.  If USCIS/DOS spies on mine, they will find I’m obsessed with Great Pyrenees doggos, weather, and The Onion.

Very sound advice. I can always count on you to be the voice of wisdom. Thank you.

If you are an FB3 holder and not naturalized, you are not eligible for a K1 visa.

I appreciate they didn't look at her documents, but I don't think she should have brought a letter of invitation from you, a copy of your green card, or your bank statements.  Also, her goal should be to convince the consular officer that she will be "well taken care of" by relatives in the USA. Her goal should be to convince the officer that she can take care of herself.

I think the wedding invitation plus birth certificates plus proof of her life in Rwanda (employment letter, medical certificates, house title, etc.) is what she should bring the next time. 
 
My impression is that the consular officers review each file for 30-90 seconds and mostly make up their minds before calling the applicant up to the window for the interview. Maybe the consular officer read her file very quickly and missed that she was a doctor and head of hospital department. They might have even missed that she was going for a wedding (though "wedding" is a common fraudulent reason too).
 
Perhaps she should force her work as a doctor and her travel for wedding  into the conversation if possible, like this:
 
Q: "Good morning, how are you?
A:  "I'm well, I'm Dr. Nodame, nice to meet you."

Q: "Who are you visiting?"
A: "I'd like to go to the USA for my sister's wedding for two weeks, I'm the head of neurology at Kigali General Hospital and I can only take two weeks vacation because I've got lives to save here."
 
Q: "When was she born?"
A: "She's three years younger than I am and she has asked me to be the maid of honor at her wedding. My husband and children will stay here."
 
Q: "What is your relationship?"
A: "We're sisters, she's an accountant and I'm the head of neurology at Kigali General Hospital."

The examples above might be extreme and obnoxious, but my point is that regardless of what questions they ask, she should answer the questions in such a way that highlights that she's a doctor and that she is going for a particular very special reason for which a doctor might be expected to be pulled away from her duties for a week or two.  
 
Otherwise, if they only glanced at her file for a few seconds they may think she's just another poor uneducated Rwandan asking to go to the USA to "visit" a relative.
 


 

Unfortunately, they are not required to look at any additional documentation. I don't know the specifics for Rwanda, but many African countries are considered "high-fraud" countries (meaning a higher rate of visas are abused to get to the U.S. and stay illegally or adjust status). Visa fraud has the unfortunate side affect of making it much harder for honest people to get visitor visas.
 
There is nothing you can personally do to help her chances. It is her visa application - you cannot sponsor her in any form or fashion and nothing you provide will be given any consideration. Invitation letters are also meaningless. The fact she has a relative in the U.S. will be seen as a negative factor, always. They will likely always assume she may have immigrant intent. 
 
I'm sorry to not have a more positive response, but that's the reality of the situation. 
 

Marriage by proxy and qualifying for immigration benefits is possible, per the previously provided section.
It must be consummated before being eligible to petition.
That said, it usually used in cases of like the military.
 
There's not really a benefit here, and doing so would just make things more complex than they need to be.
Marry in person and you'll make your process simpler. And it won't take any longer (except maybe the time to receive the marriage certificate? haha).
 
On what basis did you receive your green card? How long ago was it?
 
I started to type something here, but then I remembered that my wife reads my posts sometimes.

Check with local churches, shelters, that sort of thing...if that were to happen.
Immigration wise, though, your questions have been answered appropriately---she cannot do anything like "get you deported" or anything like that.
 
You can also ask family/friends from back home to lend you money.

Then you're golden. Your status is not tied to your spouse.
 
If you end of divorcing (I suggest marriage counseling first!), you can file for ROC (I-751) with a divorce waiver + the final divorce decree. You only need to show that the marriage was entered into in good faith. Many people do it...don't think that being divorced is a significant hurdle.
 
FYI - You can get an unrestricted SS card now that you have a green card. I suggest going to the SSA and doing so. It comes in handy if you ever need to change jobs and your green card is expired (ROC is taking along time right now).

Do you have a green card yet? If so, then divorce and move on. You can do ROC on your own.
If you don't have a green card yet (AOS has not yet been approved), then start planning to be required to leave. You have no legal means to remain without her support.
If she does still want to provide support, it is technically possible to finish AOS per Matter of Sesay. Get professional assistance.

If you haven’t started yet, I’d recommend a good long think about whether the K-1 really is right for you. I see nothing in what you have posted that suggests the K-1 is a good choice. In fact, your point number 4 is completely at odds with a K-1. 
 
You say you want to be together as quickly as possible. Every single one of us gets that and wishes that for ourselves too. We don’t love our spouses or fiancés any less than you do so we completely understand that. 
 
However, that’s a classic case of thinking with your heart not your head. To be together a few months quicker (and what’s a few months when you have decades ahead of you?) you are considering depriving your fiancé of an income and career progression for many months. Depending on the industry she’s in, for every month out of action it can take multiple months to get back to the original stage. She will be able to do nothing except volunteer for a charity for months and months. Depending on the state you are moving to she may not be able to drive for months. In many parts of the USA beyond the big cities that can leave you almost housebound. If a family member becomes ill or dies she would not be able to leave the country to go home and return. She can leave, it’s coming back that’s the issue. 
 
Immigration is a hugely emotional and overwhelming journey. The only thing that saved my sanity (apart from the love and support of my husband) in those early weeks was going to work and doing the job I love and that I spent years and years studying for. I didn’t spend 7 years in university doing 2 degrees to sit at home. Also earning money and not being worried about finances was a relief too. 
 
Marriage and immigration are long-term decisions and require long-term plans, despite our hormones. 

1.  That may or may not fit the consulate's definition of domicile.  All but one those things you listed can easily be done by someone living anywhere in the world.  
2.  All documents sent to USCIS must be translated.  Anyone fluent in both languages can certify the translation by attaching the approved USCIS translation statement.
3.  Visiting during the process is allowed....providing she can show evidence of strong ties to her country and intent to return after the short visit.  Permission to enter is determined at the time of entry and is at the discretion of CBP. 
4.  Working without valid authorization (EAD) is illegal. That is only one benefit of a CR-1 over a K-1.

I wanted to address the negative attitudes we have seen on the rise recently in the upper/ immigration forums towards those who ask beginner/ simple questions, or have unusually fast or slow VisaJourneys.

First, there is a tone difference between the Progress forums- which are mostly for support and cheerleading, and the Info forums, which are mostly to have questions answered.   While all our forums are supposed to be welcoming to all and friendly, this is especially important in the Progress forums, which are not to discuss politics, or be negative towards  those fortunate to have their case dealt with quickly, or  critical of those who voice sadness about their own slow progress. These forums are there to uplift eachother!

Secondly- in the info forums, you may get bad news.  When a question is asked, our members are encouraged to answer truthfully, even if this may not be what the Op wants to hear, because it is important to be informed.  However, the emphasis is still on being welcoming and friendly.  If you need to give bad news, do so gently, and stick to facts; constructive criticism of the Op's plans ARE allowed, but the emphasis is on constructive.  No need to dwell on mistakes (or tell members they should be on 90 Day Fiance- that is a personal attack and automatic suspension), or  illegal actions in the past- instead, encourage and explain legal options for the future.  And ONLY legal options- as per our TOS, VJ does not support, condone or encourage illegal (immigration) actions, and such posts will be removed.

Ultimately, we are here to help all members, old and new, easy cases and complicated, those who write a fact filled bullet point post and those who are panicking and don't make much sense in their first post. Yes, sometimes questions can be easily googled, or answered via a search of our forums.  But if you feel that way, just scroll past- no need to criticise the OP for asking the question. 

It isn't
owning property in her name
having a bank account
and/or a job to return to
 
and yes,  we tried it and from Morocco like you,  got denied for MIL
mostly as she can not read and write
but now,  we applied without any documents from us and she was approved and coming this summer

Having no family = having no means to legally stay, and illegally staying has hurdles.
Having close family, especially USC immediate relatives = means to stay. Unfortunately, many people have abused immigration in the past this way, which is why it can be harmful.
 
The reason to visit as a tourist has very little value. They don't care if you want to go to Disneyland or see a relative. They care about having a compelling reason to return home afterwards.

In many cases, organizations, schools and companies fund trips for certain individuals and in this scenario, yes, being able to show that your visit is being funded by a third party helps. Even then, the burden to show ties to home country is on the applicant and no one else.
 
An entirely different situation is when a family member or friend decides to "sponsor" a visitor. As the posts above me have warned, having a relative in the US is more of a disadvantage than an advantage, because it raises the suspicion that said relative might as well shoulder the costs of a potential overstay.
 
To this day, I am still to see anyone here on VJ report that their "funding" has assisted in a visitor visa for a family member. On the other hand, you will see many stories of people that had a visa denied despite said "sponsorship".

He was preparing to give you the shirt off his back, then saw your obvious revulsion and thought better of it, that's our conclusion si R man.

I like seeing buff guys without their shirts on. I like seeing guys with dad bods without theirs on too.  Buuuuut, I also think women should be able to take off theirs. #freethenipple
 
Most gyms require shirts for hygiene. 

Righteous rant of the weekend...
 
I'm on my normal weekend run this morning, I'm tired having run about 6 miles but I'm on the home stretch of the last 2 miles. It's 9:00 AM and still relatively cool - low 70's. Some 25-ish yr old guy pops out of his neighborhood, just slightly behind me as I cross to his side of the street. So he goes zooming by me. No biggie. But then he takes off his shirt to show the whole world his glorious torso. Leave the dang shirt on already. I detest guys of any age or shape that feel the need to take off their shirt for anything other than swimming. I don't care if you're 25 and buff, 40 with a pot belly, 50 and buff but with pasty white skin and lesions, or a 60 year old dude with a saggy chest re-living your glory years. No one wants to see you without your shirt.  If you want to do it in the privacy or your own home, I have no problem, just not out in public.
 
By the way, I'm an infrequent gym goer - maybe once every 2 months. I don't recall guys removing their shirts in a gym. This seems more like an outdoor running/cycling/whatever activity. Do gyms require guys to keep their shirts on?
 
Rant done.

When you get dementia, it is going to be a wild ride for your loved ones. 

Call the toll-free POTS line at 1-Many00-ManyManyMany-ManyManyManyMany to place your order, si C-ma'am ma'am.
Create your POTS by means of the personalized a la carte method, si C-ma'am ma'am.
Dial the above number and press "Many" to pick your accessories, easy-peasy C-ma'am ma'am.

I know !!!  I love messing with them at stop lights. 

To say that I did not have any anxiety going back to work it would be a lie. Since we moved last year, Mini was going to daycare twice a week for socialization and to allow me to do some things that are better taken care of without children (i.e getting a mammography). Mini has been SUPER attached to me and I was very anxious about daycare even if he was going to keep going to the same place he had been going for the past year. 
I started sending him for the full week, a week before I actually started working. I was dropping him off at a time when his teacher was there and he was OK, however, the drop off time once I started the job was going to be an hour prior to her arrival.... Tears.. lots of tears and MAMAAAAAAAAASSS. It didn't help that the teacher who received him in the morning, doesn't normally "deal" with 3 year-old kids and was not very helpful.
 
All in all, it took him a week to get into the rhythm of things.  We've been tear free for almost 2 weeks and it's been such a relief for me. The guilt has gone down a few notches and balance is being restored. I truly needed to start working. This past winter was brutal and you probably know the feeling better than me (not being able to be outside, turning into the entertainer for the little ones, etc, etc). So, this too shall pass, mama! That's what I kept telling myself, even when he refused to take a bath and screamed bloody murder. 
 
I hope you find out what your schedule will be soon. I'm sure that preparing for that structure will give you more peace of mind too. Best wishes on the new job! 🤗