US Citizen wife possible victim of marriage fraud

[Boiler 43,526]

I have been reminded the OP's other account, and there were numerous red flags, obviously those flags do not always come to fruition, sadly in this case they did.

And yes from a T country but not the one I originally thought of.

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

It might be better she does this rather than the moderator but maybe that is also your/our readers/ responsibility.

Only she can do it. There is nothing revealed in this thread to follow up on, no name, no place, no country.

[cdneh 3,112]

Call FBI if he's talking about bombs, ISIS and assault rifles.

This. Please do this. And walk away and do not look back.

[millefleur 5,037]

This thread is really no place for that sort of carry on. It doesn't matter. Not at all.

Totally agree. I don't think speculating about the OP's personal life details/identity is appropriate if she herself wanted such information to remain anonymous.

[Beth & Achraf 328]

You need to move on and away from him, he has serious issues, psychotic, and a wanna be as the way he is talking about cutting off heads, bombs and #######, shooting guns, that serious #######..... but sounds like he is a Little man that talks big #######.

You need to protect yourself and your kiddos, No man is worth this stuff, that is not true love, or even a soul mate, especially a Jekyll & Hyde personality.

If that was my husband, I'd be long gone , be strong, protect yourself and kids. I rather be without a man, then living in fear everyday then just to be able to say I have a man. Pftttttt. Lots of men out there, and sometimes in our own back yard,

Be smart, be strong, and move on quickly.............. best wishes.

[Ban Hammer 12,845]

Totally agree. I don't think speculating about the OP's personal life details/identity is appropriate if she herself wanted such information to remain anonymous.

fully agree.

the following is for those individuals who are not posting constructively in this thread:

1. numerous posts for drama stirring and speculations about the country of origin of the beneficiary removed.

2. thread bans AND admin action will follow should any further discussions about the above continue.

charles

vj moderation

[USAMorocco 143]

Please please please get you and your children out from around him and protect yourself. Divorce him. Many men from other cultures often will not go for therapy ESPECIALLY if they are from another country. I would report him to the FBI and the counterterrorism division in your local county or town. Please don't play with this man. I am so sorry this happened to you. I am sorry you and your children are caused so much pain and stress. =( Good luck!

[Cathi 5,613]

I'm sorry that this happened to you. If I were in your shoes, I'd do research about how men treat women in his home country and about their rights. Sure, there will be some things that say women are treated well but you should also find things that validate the things he said to you. If you know others (not related to him) from there, talk to them as well. If you get a better understanding of the cultural norms you'll be less likely to believe that he will change. It will also help you realize that there's nothing you could have done to change the way he treated you. And go see a counselor. You deserve better and you need someone who will affirm your value. Also get a divorce and put some legal space between the two of you.

It is irrelevant how other men from his home country treat their wives. It is relevant how HE treats her. There are good men from every country who treat their wives with love and respect and bad men from every country who treat their wives horribly, including the US. Just because someone is from a so called "Islamic country" does not make them bad and your post is filled with innuendos. I am married to a Muslim man from a Muslim country and he treats me better than any man from the US has ever treated men, including my ex husband.

OP: I am so sorry for what you are going through and I am assuming he had his 10 year green card when he entered the US because he was in AP for 22 months, so really the only thing you can do is divorce him and move on. Cut all ties with him as he will do everything in his power to convince you he is a changed person when that simply isn't true.Don't accept phone calls, don't go see him, don't allow him near you and you children. Don't feel bad for him because he is in a homeless shelter, the reason he is there is because he abused you and if you allow him back in it may be better at first but it will only spiral. and in the end things will get far worse. Please keep us updated.

Edited October 21, 2016 by mimolicious

[Cathi 5,613]

Thanks everyone for the responses. I do have a couple friends with husbands from the same country, and the husbands both said that this behavior would never happen. Wives are treated very well usually. They think he's dangerous. The thing that throws me is how could he fake an awesome personality for 3+ years? I am still in love with MY husband, the one that was waiting forever to be with me forever to live happily ever after. I am feeling like, I am in mourning, like MY husband got murdered or something and this person stole his visa. I don't know this man. Same looks, but personality is horrible...and all he ever does now is beg me to forgive him, he accepts responsibility for his abusive behavior towards me and says he feels bad about it, and wants me to let him prove he will never do it again. But he's said it before...many times since he's been here the past 5 months now. I called ICE they said if he breaks his ppo he will be arrested, and to call them immediately, and they will proceed with removal; because he is still conditional for first 5 years after arrival...& there are certain things immigrants can be deported for, and violating a ppo is one of them. The thing is, that would be forever... but I want MY husband. Does everyone here really think this man can't be rehabilitated through the DV class therapy? How do I accept that THIS man really is MY husband, and scammed me this whole time??? Am I insane because I want to believe him, that he'll change? How can anyone do this to anyone? Should I call his family and tell them? He's threatened suicide. The first week he was here we went to a gun dealer, he found a semi-automatic black rifle they said he could buy for around $700, he had plans of buying it "for protection" ...until i added that in the ppo that they should ban his ability to purchase a firearm. Oh, btw...he used to follow islam. I wore hijab of my own free will while we were separated waiting for issue. After he got here, he made me stop wearing hijab, and wear tank tops and short shorts...we never prayed, nor followed Ramadan this year, never went to mosque, nothing islamic. He drinks alcohol now, occasionally. His family knows nothing. I haven't skyped with them for months, because I don't want to lie. I know, he sounds horrible. He even commented to me, laughing... that he would do a bomb like the one in new york, the pressure cooker one, in the dumpster if trump paid him, and made him disappear. He told me isis is hiring in his country...you pledge your life for 7 years, they pay you like a king, but at the end of the time you have to give your life as a suicide bomber, no exceptions, no way out. Why would he tell me these things? I seriously think whoever this guy is, is psychotic and possibly dangerous. BUT I don't know if he was just talking or... if it's possible he would do something. I don't know who this man is, but he looks like MY husband...how do I handle this, and being committed to marriage, shouldn't I give him a chance to prove he wants to be a good person by going to these DV classes? I know, I sound like I'm mental...but I'm devastated and feel like, wth is going on??? I have been going to therapy, talked to domestic violence advocates, my doctor put me on xanax, talked to the dr's office counselor, talked with friends....but I still feel sick. I believe he is a narcissist sociopath...but again, is this man really MY husband, and HOW did he pretend to have a completely different attitude/personality for over 3 years? Was is like a split personality? How do I get his old personality back? Was he possessed? Can anyone help me to make the connection? Thanks for any response.

You need to inform the authorities immediately if he is making bomb threats.

[Boiler 43,526]

This is an immigration forum and the thread has digressed a bit, as I guess it was bound to.

As he was in AP for 22 months he must have his 10 year GC, so the only other aspect is that the OP would have sponsored him and should review the liabilities under the I 864, sounds like he does not have much and realistically will not if he stays. I sort of assume he will.

[BethyWink 96]

You seem like a nice person, but you need to call the FBI ASAP!!! This post honestly scares me, as well as many other members on this group. YOU NEED TO TALK TO THE FEDS ASAP!!! (Hopefully the govt does monitor these boards and already is looking)

As for the beginning, yes, there were many red flags! My husband currently lives in DK, which has a smaller time gap (not by much) and we struggle to be able to find one hour a day to call each other, not to mention 5-10 hours a day on skype! At that point it looks like, his full time job was to get you to get him into the country. Leave him, call the cops, get him out of the country, and find a good man who loves you for you and does not even think about harming you!

[Boiler 43,526]

You seem like a nice person, but you need to call the FBI ASAP!!! This post honestly scares me, as well as many other members on this group. YOU NEED TO TALK TO THE FEDS ASAP!!! (Hopefully the govt does monitor these boards and already is looking)

As for the beginning, yes, there were many red flags! My husband currently lives in DK, which has a smaller time gap (not by much) and we struggle to be able to find one hour a day to call each other, not to mention 5-10 hours a day on skype! At that point it looks like, his full time job was to get you to get him into the country. Leave him, call the cops, get him out of the country, and find a good man who loves you for you and does not even think about harming you!

How is she supposed to get him out of the country?

[Merrytooth 5,748]

Frankly, what can FBI do at this moment? They can't lock him up or kick him out of USA just because he has thoughts about ISIS, bomb threat, assault rifles..etc

The recent NYC bombing -> the father himself has been warning FBI about his son for 2 years yet nothing much can be done till bad things happened.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/09/23/nyregion/ahmad-khan-rahami-bombing.html

[Boiler 43,526]

Frankly, what can FBI do at this moment? They can't lock him up or kick him out of USA just because he has thoughts about ISIS, bomb threat, assault rifles..etc

The recent NYC bombing -> the father himself has been warning FBI about his son for 2 years yet nothing much can be done till bad things happened.

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/09/23/nyregion/ahmad-khan-rahami-bombing.html

I was thinking the same, look at it dispassionately, he was subject to recent checking, and coming from a disappointed spouse?

[BethyWink 96]

How is she supposed to get him out of the country?

That would be for the FBI and Immigrations to deal with, but DV, terrorist threats, and fraud are all reasons of deportation.