K1 Why Bother

[Cheburashka34 228]

Because we want to be together? Why else? 

 

Also, pertaining to CR1, it's too hard to get married for some of us, or we would.

 

I don't know why people are so negative. I thought this site was to help and encourage? It's oftentimes made me want to stay off it.

[Bikeordeath 10]

Why cause you can start the process now Some countries are on lockdown so you can’t even see your fiancé in some countries require you to stay a certain amount of time to get married everybody doesn’t have that type of vacation time off of work and everybody circumstance is different

[Unlockable 7,306]

18 minutes ago, Cheburashka34 said:

Because we want to be together? Why else? 

 

Also, pertaining to CR1, it's too hard to get married for some of us, or we would.

 

I don't know why people are so negative. I thought this site was to help and encourage? It's oftentimes made me want to stay off it.

What negative???

 

The OP simply asked people's opinion in an open discussion. People are just sharing how they feel about certain aspects of immigration. It gives a chance for every to see things from different perspective.

 

Saying you prefer one process over another does not mean you are being negative.

[Cheburashka34 228]

2 minutes ago, Unlockable said:

What negative???

 

The OP simply asked people's opinion in an open discussion. People are just sharing how they feel about certain aspects of immigration. It gives a chance for every to see things from different perspective.

 

Saying you prefer one process over another does not mean you are being negative.

That is your opinion. But I've seen several posts where people are incredibly negative about it. Why would I make this up?

[Unlockable 7,306]

3 minutes ago, Cheburashka34 said:

That is your opinion. But I've seen several posts where people are incredibly negative about it. Why would I make this up?

Negative about what exactly? The K1 visa? 

 

I never said you made anything up. Just wanted to know who is negative?

 

And I agree that in my opinion I don't find anybody being "incredibly negative". People are sharing their opinions. I went through the K1 and I have stated that it would not be my first choice. The overall consensus for a lot of people is that the K1 has too many disadvantages. And this is from real life experiences. 

 

[Cheburashka34 228]

31 minutes ago, Unlockable said:

Negative about what exactly? The K1 visa? 

 

I never said you made anything up. Just wanted to know who is negative?

 

And I agree that in my opinion I don't find anybody being "incredibly negative". People are sharing their opinions. I went through the K1 and I have stated that it would not be my first choice. The overall consensus for a lot of people is that the K1 has too many disadvantages. And this is from real life experiences. 

 

👍 I choose not to respond any further, as I don't like argument and confrontation. 

Edited August 13, 2020 by Cheburashka34
More info

[Bikeordeath 10]

2 hours ago, Unlockable said:

What negative???

 

The OP simply asked people's opinion in an open discussion. People are just sharing how they feel about certain aspects of immigration. It gives a chance for every to see things from different perspective.

 

Saying you prefer one process over another does not mean you are being negative.

Exactly 

[Strawberrymermaid 346]

21 hours ago, tanman22 said:

Hi, just a question but for everyone just filling for the k1 what would be the point? The backlog is growing longer everyday and for those that filled since May many of these people are going to be lucky to get an interview this year. Just my two cents 

I feel that getting it in the system and processing is better than nothing- even if processing times are unknown for the foreseeable future. Especially if you are not able to travel to each other to get married. 

[geowrian 22,335]

I'm not sure who is "bashing" the K-1 visa exactly, but people will point out all the various drawbacks and how often they don't seem to be aligned with their priorities. Often this revolves around the ability to work and/or travel abroad, or the ability to drive. Nowadays, the various EOs are a factor as well.

Sometimes, a a K-1 is better. Heck, for certain countries, they have an IV ban so CR-1 is impacted, but K-1s are not since they are NIV. So avoiding having to get a waiver, a K-1 might be a better choice right now.

However, most of the time, "it's faster" results in disregarding everything else. They'll figure it out later. It won't really be as difficult as people have said. Love will find a way. ...but sometimes things go wrong, and it almost always results in the alien being up the creek without a paddle.

 

If both parties know and accept all those drawbacks, then there's no issue with the K-1 IMO. My now-wife and I did it and had no issues. But it was rough for a new marriage even with the planning we had in place, and knowing what to expect.

It's not bashing the K-1. It's pointing out drawbacks that far too often most people new to the process don't know or think about. Each couple needs to analyze that and do what they believe is best.

 

As noted, the 90 days to marry is absolutely not a "try before you buy". I get that things can change in those 90 days and there's a lot of stress with moving, an upcoming marriage, getting acclimated to the country, etc. Sometimes people end up changing their minds to marry, and that's fine.

But please don't go into it using any of those 90 days to figure out if you actually want to marry or live in the US. Those are things you need to be certain of beforehand. If something changes later, so be it.

[laylalex 7,249]

I went through the K1 process with my ex-husband. At the time, it seemed like the right thing for us to do -- we had been apart long enough. We'd actually had a false start the year before on the K1, started filling out the forms and then we broke up temporarily, so when things got back on track we wanted to be together ASAP. It was NOT a good move in the end. He was restless and bored during AOS. He couldn't drive because the CA DMV treated him as a new resident within only a couple of weeks and in need of a CA license... which he couldn't get until AOS was over. He had been working as a company director for several years before he got to the US, and now here he was, stuck at home, no friends that weren't mine, no family that wasn't mine, no job he could work but one he was itching to return to, at least remotely. He was deeply frustrated and deeply bored. In retrospect, we should have done a CR1 since he could have traveled back and forth on the VWP/ESTA before he got the visa. I mean, in retrospect we never should have married but hey, what can you do.  

 

For some people, the enforced time without a job or the ability to travel is not a problem. For others, it is a stress on a new marriage. He and I had known each other for five years when we married, and I had lived with him in the UK for six months before he moved over here AND spent most of a year abroad in college as his girlfriend, and it was still a huge shock living together as married people. He was dependent on me, and he's a fiercely independent person. I think people can get swept up in the romance of it all, and not remember that immigration is a HIGHLY non-romantic process.

 

And I am firmly in the camp that when you sign that "intent to marry" letter when you're doing a K1, YOU MEAN IT. It's not a "if I don't like it in 90 days, this isn't meant to be" visa. It can take a whole lot longer than that to decide a place is for you. I mean, my ex was losing his mind 90 days in (though we were married by then) and would have willingly bailed at that point. Now he's a citizen and can't see himself ever moving back to the UK permanently (even if his girlfriend would love that...).

 

All of this is to say that people need to have some very frank and honest discussions about the non-romantic stuff about working and driving and traveling before choosing a visa, unless the CR1 is really closed off to them for any of the good reasons others have mentioned. It is hard to do that when you are starry-eyed and you're newly engaged, but that's the reality. 

[Cheburashka34 228]

Honestly I want to marry my fiance on day one of the visa, I don't care about the ninety days. We only have to do this one because it's overly difficult and complicated for me to take off work for a long period of time to get married in Russia, and I don't have boocoos of money to spend on flights to the Caribbean for a quick marriage. And right now with all the travel restrictions I can't see us being able to marry until sometime next year if we even tried one of those routes so that would add another year and a half or so to our timeline of finally being together. Honestly I'd rather not do the whole adjustment of status and everything, but I'd rather get some sort of process started now rather than later. Life is too short not to be with the one you love!

[theballaam96 49]

12 hours ago, geowrian said:

As noted, the 90 days to marry is absolutely not a "try before you buy". I get that things can change in those 90 days and there's a lot of stress with moving, an upcoming marriage, getting acclimated to the country, etc. Sometimes people end up changing their minds to marry, and that's fine.

But please don't go into it using any of those 90 days to figure out if you actually want to marry or live in the US. Those are things you need to be certain of beforehand. If something changes later, so be it.

This ^

imo, when you go to file, you need to be 100% sure that's what you want to do. Sure, I get that they always say "living together is different from talking on the phone", but I know that whatever challenges come my way that everything will turn out fine and we'll still be together 50 years down the line. If this doesn't sound like something you feel, then you shouldn't file until you feel this way.

I wish the show 90 Day Fiance didn't exist, because it definitely gives off the wrong impression of K-1s.

[joe.b 33]

On 8/12/2020 at 6:00 PM, tanman22 said:

Hi, just a question but for everyone just filling for the k1 what would be the point? The backlog is growing longer everyday and for those that filled since May many of these people are going to be lucky to get an interview this year. Just my two cents 

Maybe you should consider the range of possible circumstances people are in. In my/our case, my fiance and I are a same-sex couple and he lives in a country that does not recognize same-sex marriage. Therefore, even if travel to his country were possible at the moment (it is not, due to the pandemic), we would not be able to get married there. For us K1 is literally the only feasible option.

[NoMansLand2020 298]

We are still a young couple.. My fiancée is in her twenties, I'm in my thirties. She has two small children, ages 6 and 4 whom have never had a Dad in their life. We also want more children.

 

We opted for K1 not only because it traditionally  has a shorter processing timeline, but I don't want to be separated from my wife and kids... Only being able to visit them a few weeks out of the year.

 

The kids certainly do not understand why "daddy" cannot come back or why they can't come here to see me. I don't want to put them through any more trauma or drama then they've already been through. 

[geowrian 22,335]

1 hour ago, joe.b said:

Maybe you should consider the range of possible circumstances people are in. In my/our case, my fiance and I are a same-sex couple and he lives in a country that does not recognize same-sex marriage. Therefore, even if travel to his country were possible at the moment (it is not, due to the pandemic), we would not be able to get married there. For us K1 is literally the only feasible option.

Why wouldn't you be able to get married in another country (ignoring current travel conditions)? The US doesn't care if it's illegal in your home country...only that it's legal where it occurs.

 

57 minutes ago, NoMansLand2020 said:

We opted for K1 not only because it traditionally  has a shorter processing timeline, but I don't want to be separated from my wife and kids... Only being able to visit them a few weeks out of the year.

Other than the timeframe....isn't it essentially the same either way? You're not together yet....whether that's as spouses or fiance + fiancee, the end result is the same.

Maybe it's just me, but being separated from my fiancee is equally hard as being separated from my spouse. They're the same person.

Except you have more legal options if married.

 

The main reason my now-wife and I did the K-1 is because we were ready to get married, but not ready to be married yet.

We were engaged and wanted to get married in the coming ~9 months or so (it was flexible). The K-1 path fit that well for us as we could get started now.

But we did not want to actually be married yet. It was too soon - we wanted time to prepare. She had things to take care of abroad still (her work contract, for example). To marry, we would have to travel abroad again and go through the decently-lengthy process. That wasn't feasible in our cases for at least another 6 months due to needing time off work (I could not visit the country where she worked....they did not have tourist visas until recently). Only then could we start the spousal visa process. So it would have been ~6 months to get started on the visa process, then the CR-1 process of around a year or so. Whereas the K-1 process was closer to 6-7 months since we could start immediately.