Why Upset Over AOS Wait?

[javadown2 308]

5 hours ago, sparkles_ said:

Some of us had higher plans for our partners, as did they themselves besides being able to just look at each other on the daily. Not that this isn't great, but still. I know my spouse was stuck in 2 years of standstill during his AOS and was unable to persue education in the states for example, something that greatly upset us both. Some states and cities are less than accommodating to giving driver licenses to those with just and EAD....one would only have to search VJ for a mountain of those threads. The immigrant living in one year incriments is also nerve racking, for both parties usually. Icould name more but I digress. 

Why is it "higher" plans if ones wife wants to be home and raise a child? We just don't sit around looking at each other, we actually do things like traveling, day to day life, volunteer at church,etc.. But yes I do understand if you have plans for anything you need your green card, but still it takes time so why stress about it? My guess is people NEED the second income to survive...that's probable the number ONE reason people stress about it. It's nice to be able to support my family on one income.  

[sparkles_ 456]

6 minutes ago, javadown2 said:

Why is it "higher" plans if ones wife wants to be home and raise a child? We just don't sit around looking at each other, we actually do things like traveling, day to day life, volunteer at church,etc.. But yes I do understand if you have plans for anything you need your green card, but still it takes time so why stress about it? My guess is people NEED the second income to survive...that's probable the number ONE reason people stress about it. It's nice to be able to support my family on one income.  

My higher plans involved me becoming a stay at home mom as well, which I am now, but my spouse had to also level up and that was all but impossible sans GC. Everyone's definition of higher plans, meaning beyond just having their immigrant spouse arrive, differ. For us, it was also a must that my spouse finish his education ASAP so I can stay home with the children, since I had my fill of both higher education and working. You're surely right, it is nice to be able to not stress over a second income, and it probably is a driving reason for many.

Edited October 15, 2017 by sparkles_

[Jeanne Adil 1,651]

what u do not realize is the back of the green card says "carry this with you at all times"

for those who may look to immigration officers a person could be suspect of being here illegally and a lot of  ####### then happens

the following is not to offend anyone but just seeing things the way many americans look at things

they suspect all muslims are terrorist (after 9/11)

they suspect all mesicans are here illegally

they think many come for just the green card 

and in thinking these things they will and do report people 

if caught (just going to convenient store or something) without the greeen card can cost lawyer fees 

you, being from England, don't know what high fraud countries go thru just to be here 

i am only glad we did not have to go thru AOS (expense and all this wait)

and now you know what is so important about the green card

 

BTW to the above 

take your marriage licence and proof of residency and go to SS office to get SS number and then to bank for an account

[Scandi 3,975]

Personally I wasn't upset by the AOS wait at all and that was by far the easiest process this far in my immigration journey. Just like you say, OP, the i-129f/K-1 was way worse, it made the AOS process feel like a walk in the park.

 

However, just because I wasn't in a hurry to receive my greencard I can understand if the wait is hard for others. There are so many reasons to want the greencard fast, one of them being that you can finally relax och not having to deal with more immigration related issues for almost 2 years - after being through almost a year of the K-1 process and then another year of AOS the break is certainly very welcome for most of us.

 

The feeling of having the LPR status and that ugly, expensive card in your hand alone is an amazing feeling, you're finally legal and not in limbo anymore, why wouldn't people want to come to this point as early as possible? Maybe it's harder for the USC partner to realize what it means to us foreigners, I don't know.

 

There are just less worries in your life once the greencard arrives, it's a relief.

Edited October 15, 2017 by Scandi

[javadown2 308]

5 hours ago, TriloByte said:

Then you need to learn to read and understand intent. I thought it was obvious, but since it was not, I will spell it out. I asked because I was concerned that there might be real risks associated with this phase of the process, that I was missing, like getting deported. The frown emoticons, etc, lead me here, with this question. This is a family based immigration thread which means that the primary intent is being united with a loved one. I am in no way trying to discredit a person wanting to go to school, work, etc. I am simply trying to determine if I am missing something critical that would result in us being separated. If you took what I said to mean something else then you are wrong.

I think some feel the end goal is to get the 10 year green card then become a US citizen....but I disagree, the end goal is to live happily together and the rest will happen in time. Living life daily is the end goal, making each day matter. There is actually no timeline on starting your AOS status but I guess you will be out of status and technically "illegal" but honestly there is no worries. Some feel security in checking off the steps in the process and "completing" that step. But really it is subjective and each has their own journey. 

[dystopia 112]

10 minutes ago, Scandi said:

Personally I wasn't upset by the AOS wait at all and that was by far the easiest process this far in my immigration journey. Just like you say, OP, the i-129f/K-1 was way worse, it made the AOS process feel like a walk in the park.

 

However, just because I wasn't in a hurry to receive my greencard I can understand if the wait is hard for others. There are so many reasons to want the greencard fast, one of them being that you can finally relax och not having to deal with more immigration related issues for almost 2 years - after being through almost a year of the K-1 process and then another year of AOS the break is certainly very welcome for most of us.

 

The feeling of having the LPR status and that ugly, expensive card in your hand alone is an amazing feeling, you're finally legal and not in limbo anymore, why wouldn't people want to come to this point as early as possible? Maybe it's harder for the USC partner to realize what it means to us foreigners, I don't know.

 

There are just less worries in your life once the greencard arrives, it's a relief.

This. Thank You. My husband and I love going out and I always feel weird pulling out my passport each time I was asked for an ID. I can't wait for that ID. 

[kris&me 572]

some VJ members have gone thru years of immigration "hold ups " just to be with the loved one

to be still in the hands of an immigration officer starts to feel like u have no control over your own life

being from a friendly English speaking country, you can not understand the daily wait of looking and hoping for a good letter and response from USCIS to even get a visa

and then AOS or ROC and more money and more of a wait,  it actually gets heartbreaking

high fraud countries go through a hard time with every step of every applicaiton and process here so it gets to be a headache

[Ischnura 285]

 I felt like a proper person again when the AOS wait was over and I had my GC. It wasn't so much the length of the wait that was stressful but more other things that the wait made stressful. My husband is a contractor and so we move around at least once a year so the wait meant we were hoping a contract wasn't pulled suddenly that would send us somewhere else. The drive for our interview was over 300 miles away anyhoo - Moses Lake, WA to Yakima, WA. Since I take care of the finances/bills/etc without having a SSN I wasn't on the accounts so nobody would talk to me, which was super frustrating moving in to a new place. Carrying a passport everywhere was a pain too. The list goes on . . .

 It's definitely an each to their own situation where stresses over AOS, or any portion of the immigration process, are concerned. 

[-Trinity- 513]

Another thing to consider ( it didn't cause me any stress, but sometimes it led to situations I had to explain) is answering the question about what is your status. To me my status wasn't really a thing, I know I'm here legally. But when we came back from Europe I got double checked at the departure airport and upon arrival we had to go in secondary. We just had a long exausthing trip with young kids,and last thing we wanted is waiting and going through what seemed to be an interrogation. However the first officer was very polite and explained that with an AP they follow certain guidelines and I totally understand that. The second was friendly and polite one too, and without us complaining he apologized and said: hopefully you guys receive your GC soon and you won't need to go through this.

 

Bottom line: GC makes certain things much easier and less complex. 

 

[-Trinity- 513]

1 hour ago, javadown2 said:

I think some feel the end goal is to get the 10 year green card then become a US citizen....but I disagree, the end goal is to live happily together and the rest will happen in time.

Agreed!

 

Personally I'm not even sure yet whether I will become a US citizen or not. It's not like it's mandatory and at some point I will make the decision, it's just not a set in stone thing.

[MsCompE 50]

7 hours ago, TriloByte said:

... I think I got the answer to my question, you guessed it, deportation.Thanks ☺️

I am the AOS filer. I am not at all worried of deportation. 

 

Well, the AOS process is very uncertain. For my case, we filed close to 9months with NO UPDATES since January 26 . Who knows whats going on. 

Most AOS filers never had their USCIS Case Online updated. They just receive something in the mail. My AP never updated online but I got the combo card.

Who knows what's the progress of the papers. 

 

The USCIS could have misplaced the application. The USPS Delivery man could have missed it and you can get  a denial just because someone else scr*wed up. What would you feel if you received a denial letter just because you missed an interview but never got the Interview Notice?

 

My husband and I could not travel abroad without worries that anytime we will be called for an interview. My husband has never met my family since I met him here in Texas. This coming November, would be his first time traveling out of the country and instead of preparing to have a good time, we are stuck praying hopefully we wont be called for an interview. Philippines is halfway around the world. It is a 24-hour trip. 

 

Second, I am a software engineer and project manager before I met husband. Now stuck washing dishes just because the career I had isnt here in this city where my husband lives. I tried enrolling to school to change career but schools cannot admit me as "RESIDENT" because I dont have a GC to show. Tuition fee is double as compared to In State. Now, I had to defer taking school and to defer taking a career that will make me feel I have a purpose until the day I can present to the school that I am a resident. Not that I need to work, but my husband isnt retired yet to sit with me forever at home. He is at his prime and I couldnt sit at home watching Netflix all day while he works. I want to help him in everything. I want to contribute on our daily expenses. 

 

Third, being a person who had already lived in multiple countries, it was very difficult for me to be immobile. I couldnt drive. My husband doesnt take me out to the mall or for dine outs. I spent 5months without seeing other soul alive apart from the USPS delivery guy who delivers the amazon items I ordered. 

When I got my combo card, I was able to apply for drivers license. But, it has the same validity as my combo card. My combo card is expiring in a couple months with no news from my AOS application. I will have to sit again at home cant drive until I get a renewal of combo card. Again, who knows how long they are going to process the renewal. 

 

P.S. Not that I complained about the process. Just to answer the subject of this thread

Edited October 15, 2017 by MsCompE

[Mr Geminian 691]

Being in a foreign country without a proper legal status ?!?!?!.... ahhh that will make anyone go mad and also one cannot travel outside the country without a Travel Document and what if there's an emergency on spouse side of the family? what will she do ? You may have money to buy a emergency ticket and leave the country but cannot return because your AOS will be treated as abandoned and i used to work in IT sector in a MNC and i used to have a busy work schedule and now am going mad because am not working and for me I wanna get a EAD so that i can get back to work and start contributing towards the bills groceries etc etc  and so my friend there are different factors to be considered and it will depend upon person to person

Edited October 15, 2017 by Aviinashh

[TriloByte 1,818]

Thanks, everyone! This is been very helpful. Being new to this process, I really have no idea.

[NikLR 13,220]

4 hours ago, Valex said:

Same sex marriage

 

it's impossible in ASIA.

 

I'm sorry but i find your comment offensive. You don't know my story. 

You don't question people's decision here. 

 

Im aware of the immigration process. One step at a time. Im just saying having a GC is better than having no status at all right?

 

It's your choice to be offended over a question and a statement that was factual.  It is what it is and frankly I don't really care why you chose the method you did. 

As stated everyone is individual and the choices you make are the ones you have made for your relationship.  Good for you.  It was a choice you guys made. 

[Ontarkie 13,925]

~~ As this thread has ruffled many feathers and is not a processing question it is now locked. Do not restart this thread.~~