Inadmissible after green card recieved

[neocarbunkle 2]

This is kind of an odd question, but can you lose your green card if you were never supposed to have received it in the first place?

 

My wife falls under the category of " People with physical or mental disorders that may cause harm to themselves or others ". I wasn't aware of this when I applied and the doctors exam she did in Tokyo was very simple and quick.

 

But it has been three years and after trying every doctor we could find, I really think she needs to go back to her home country to get treatment. She of course refuses. I have tons of evidence, including testimony of medical professionals from both before she got her green card and after, that she is a threat to herself and others.

 

Is there anything I can do? Can I appeal her green card approval? Is there some agency that I can contact to at least let them know what is going on?

 

Thanks

[Roel 7,191]

At this point you can't do anything. If doctors back at her home country approved her medical, they decided that she is fine to immigrate. 

 

Don't try to send her away because she's sick. She is not a broken package you want to return. 

 

If you're miserable in the marriage simply divorce. You can't so anything about her status. 

[Jojo92122 1,924]

Fortunately, there is nothing you can do.   You can't appeal her green card approval.   

 

Buyer's remorse is not a reason to kick your wife out of the country. 

 

Remember, you vouched for her to get a green card.  

 

Divorce and move on.

[JFH 12,189]

17 minutes ago, neocarbunkle said:

 

I wasn't aware of this when I applied 

 

 

Oh yes you were 

 

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/506973-wifes-mental-problems-are-making-things-too-difficult/

[Roel 7,191]

9 minutes ago, JFH said:

Oh yes you were 

 

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/506973-wifes-mental-problems-are-making-things-too-difficult/

 

OOOOOOOH nice find!

[JFH 12,189]

18 minutes ago, Roel said:

 

OOOOOOOH nice find!

Unfortunately that usually becomes the thread killer and we never hear the full story....

[KazuriSana 324]

Japan has better doctors than the United States? If so, you could accompany her for the treatment and give her the support she deserves from her husband.

[Sunnyland 639]

Hopefully OP comes back.

[SusieQQQ 11,584]

How desperately sad for this poor woman. I hope wherever she ends up she finds the support and help her husband can’t or won’t provide.

Edited May 20, 2018 by SusieQQQ

[Barry Krebs 13]

We all have issues.  I've been living in the US for 28 years to a wife who has a lot of health problems-she was born in the US.  Why am I still married to her?  Because we are best friends and are in love. I take sickness and health seriously.  

[neocarbunkle 2]

OK. I'm going to fess up.

 

Dating, something was up. Early marriage, I knew I was in a problem. I tried to get out of the marriage, but I kept getting back to, "oh well, I should give her another chance" or "she didn't really mean it". I had chances where I could have ended things easier, but I just couldn't get myself to do it. I now understand how people end up staying in abusive relationships longer than they should.

 

Also, I guess the immigration side is SOL for me.

 

For anyone wanting to know the whole story, see below.

 

The most important thing in this situation, is that she doesn't speak communicative level English. I have taken her to doctor after doctor, and they will have a skype translator, but it just doesn't work well. Whether they aren't really doing a good job translating, she doesn't feel comfortable opening up to the doctor via a person she doesn't know, or translating takes so much time nothing ever goes anywhere. Normal doctors are not getting us any where. By a miracle there are three Japanese counselors in my city. Two of the three she has just decided that she hates, and both of them said there was nothing more they could do for her. The last counselor that we are working with, and the Japanese clinic (before they stopped treatment because she was abusing alcohol) both really pushed for her to go back to Japan to get treatment. The counselor knows some places that she would recommend, and it might be easier to force her to get treatment there (which I need to admit, I can just take her at her word because I'm not sure how it all works there). There might be a place in New York or Chicago where she could be hospitalized, but she would have to go willingly, which would never happen. There is also an issue with medicine, the medicine they prescribe in Japan, they don't like to give in America, and if they do it is just for a short time. It is an addiction forming medication, but when she was on it, she was a maybe a 7 on her bad days, but now she is a solid 10 consistently.

 

I offered for both of to move back to Japan, but she refused. So with me seeing no way of getting her treatment in America (I have had to drag her to appointments, and she still often cancels), I filed for divorce. She just screams, yells and freaks out violently. She refuses to acknowledge that it is happening. Right now we are awaiting our pre-trial, and it just keeps getting delayed. I want to work this out, so I flat out told her, tell me how much money you want, I will take out a loan, give it to you and we can be finished. Her only response was to scream and yell. I am 100% on board with handling the divorce upfront and honest, but even if I just bring the topic up she will do something like open the car door while I am driving on the highway, cutting her wrists or breaking something. So yeah, if somehow I could get her deported, that would be something nice for me.

 

I know it sounds odd, but I am still living with her, even though our divorce pre-trial is in August. She needs someone to take care of her 24/7. I ultimately want that to be her mom, but right now I am still stuck making sure she doesn't set the apartment on fire or attack the neighbors (who she started saying that she wants to kill). I am thinking about getting a small second place, getting my name off the current lease, and fully moving out, but why I haven't done that yet is a little complicated.

 

Someone mentioned, in sickness and in health, but the reality of my marriage has been "until one of us kills the other". Literally as I was writing this she called me downstairs, threw a plate at me, grabbed the frying pan holding it like a weapon and the slammed it down on the counter saying that she was going to kill me. The reason? I said I wasn't going to spend more money on house decorations after I spent $500 on it last week. Massive freakout and it became this mess of her attacking me and me trying to restrain her. I honestly think one of these freak outs is going to lead one of us accidentally doing something we didn't intend to.

I called the police before, they came and took her to the emergency room and she ended up being hospitalized for 10 days. For most people it was supposed to be only 3 days, but because they couldn't get a translator for more than 20 minutes at a time, she ended up being there a lot longer. It was a traumatic experience for her and extremely expensive one for me ($3000 before my deductible started). Also, one time the neighbors called the police on us when things were particularly bad. The police saw my arms covered in scratches and blood and filed a police report (but I didn't press charges). Our landlord said that if the police come again then we will be evicted. So honestly, I don't know what to do.

 

I guess she could write a sob story of how she is the victim and her husband who was supposed to understand her mental illness when he married her turned out to be so cold. And honestly, if it was just her having some mental health issues, that would be one thing that I could begrudgingly bear, but every reason that people have for getting a divorce, we have those too. There is no romance or even friendship, we completely hate each other's family, we have completely opposite views on finances, we have different religious views and she consistently calls my religion a cult, and personal secrets are thrown about as common insults.

 

Any ways wrapping up. I know no one can help me with my problem. It's ultimately a situation where either she commits suicide or I live a life where I am being physically assaulted everyday. I hope you see that I am only half as terrible as a person as you first thought.

 

 

[CEE53147 559]

6 hours ago, neocarbunkle said:

This is kind of an odd question, but can you lose your green card if you were never supposed to have received it in the first place?

 

My wife falls under the category of " People with physical or mental disorders that may cause harm to themselves or others ". I wasn't aware of this when I applied and the doctors exam she did in Tokyo was very simple and quick.

 

But it has been three years and after trying every doctor we could find, I really think she needs to go back to her home country to get treatment. She of course refuses. I have tons of evidence, including testimony of medical professionals from both before she got her green card and after, that she is a threat to herself and others.

 

Is there anything I can do? Can I appeal her green card approval? Is there some agency that I can contact to at least let them know what is going on?

 

Thanks

You need to involve mental health professionals and make sure you and others are safe if she is indeed a danger to others.

[Dianalorena 1,153]

why you chose to get married and start the immigration process anyway, is beyond me. You knew how sick she is, getting into this. There's not enough love in the world that can save someone from a mental illness and I hope this helps at least one person realize that. Yes, you can support them, suggest treatment, do everything in your power but it won't magically fix things. 

Moving definitely made things worse, since now she feels alienated on top of that, due to a language barrier and considerable cultural differences. 

She was screaming and being violent in 2014, so it makes sense that she continues to do so in 2018, especially since she hasn't received the proper mental care and medication that she desperately needs. 

Like others have stated, you can't just return her because it's not convenient for you. I understand how exhausted you both must be, but  It's ultimately her choice. If the burden has become too much which I think it has, divorce her and move on. 

[neocarbunkle 2]

57 minutes ago, Dianalorena said:

why you chose to get married and start the immigration process anyway, is beyond me. You knew how sick she is, getting into this. There's not enough love in the world that can save someone from a mental illness and I hope this helps at least one person realize that. Yes, you can support them, suggest treatment, do everything in your power but it won't magically fix things. 

Moving definitely made things worse, since now she feels alienated on top of that, due to a language barrier and considerable cultural differences. 

She was screaming and being violent in 2014, so it makes sense that she continues to do so in 2018, especially since she hasn't received the proper mental care and medication that she desperately needs. 

Like others have stated, you can't just return her because it's not convenient for you. I understand how exhausted you both must be, but  It's ultimately her choice. If the burden has become too much which I think it has, divorce her and move on. 

Oh man are you right. Dating her I thought "This person doesn't know how wonderful they are deep down inside". If I could just show her love and forgive her shortcomings, I know that she will bloom into who she was meant to be. Nope. That is just fair tails. I guess I fell in love with that idea of her, rather than who she really was. Anyone else reading this, marry people for who they are right now. Not who you think they will be.

[FluffyBalls 52]

This is an absolutely miserable situation. 

 

If she has a 10-year GC, there's nothing you can do to force her back to Japan. The affidavit of support means you'll be on the hook for at least 125% of the fed poverty level (around $18,000/yr), INDEFINITELY, unless she naturalizes or leaves. There's also potential alimony on top of that for some number of years. You could also be on the hook for any gov't services she uses. 

 

My cold, hard advice? Your best bet may be to simply work out an agreement where you pay her off to move back to Japan, permanently. This will allow her to be near her mom, have some financial support for a number of years, be in a familiar environment, and most importantly, create some space in between the two of you. People who say "work it out with love" are unrealistic, out of touch mushrooms. There's no solution here that doesn't involve separation, barring some miracle. 

Talk to as many lawyers as possible, post in as many forums as you can to collect maximum information. Good luck.