Inappropriate interview questions

[kelly11anne 6]

So we did our interview for the K1 visa years ago at the embassy in Guayaquil, Ecuador and ever since then I've been curious if our experience was normal. In the original interview we were asked for the date of when we started dating and since we are not big on that kind of thing, neither of us had an idea of the exact date and we just kind of looked at each other. That caused us to do a second round of separate interviews for them to compare our answers. During the separate interviews we were asked SUPER personal questions including when the last time we had sex was and if we had used a condom. In the moment I was really shocked and really uncomfortable, but answered anyway since I felt like the whole process was riding on it. Obviously we passed (here we are celebrating 8 years married tomorrow!) but I wanted to know if other people had this experience...

[Unlockable 7,315]

Unfortunately, questions like that are not uncommon if they want to discover if your relationship is a fraud or not. They simply can't take "your word for it" as fraudulent marriages are still a big issue with immigration. So much so that we have had people admit to it on this website alone. There is a member who got visited in the early hours of the morning by immigration agents after she arrived in the US to be with her husband. They were there to see if she and her husband were really living together as husband and wife.

 

Don't take any of this personal. None of the questions they asked seem overtly inappropriate (as in they didn't ask explicit physical details about intimacy). If officer are not able to dive deep into people's relationship then it would be almost impossible to discover fraudulent marriages.

[Ed&Midori1031 330]

12 minutes ago, kelly11anne said:

So we did our interview for the K1 visa years ago at the embassy in Guayaquil, Ecuador and ever since then I've been curious if our experience was normal. In the original interview we were asked for the date of when we started dating and since we are not big on that kind of thing, neither of us had an idea of the exact date and we just kind of looked at each other. That caused us to do a second round of separate interviews for them to compare our answers. During the separate interviews we were asked SUPER personal questions including when the last time we had sex was and if we had used a condom. In the moment I was really shocked and really uncomfortable, but answered anyway since I felt like the whole process was riding on it. Obviously we passed (here we are celebrating 8 years married tomorrow!) but I wanted to know if other people had this experience...

That seems so ridiculous.  Yes, sex does play a part in a relationship but doesn't prove anything but make people feel uncomfortable.  Sorry to hear about that. 

[Russ&MaryAnn 110]

7 minutes ago, Ed&Midori1031 said:

That seems so ridiculous.  Yes, sex does play a part in a relationship but doesn't prove anything but make people feel uncomfortable.  Sorry to hear about that. 

I think they just wanted to see if both answers matched. If the answers had been we haven’t had sex that would have sufficed. IMO I don’t take it to mean sex was required

[E & J 2018 132]

It's actually a pretty clever question..... "Did you use a condom?"……. I don't think anyone would have rehearsed this question.....

[Ed&Midori1031 330]

5 minutes ago, Russ&MaryAnn said:

I think they just wanted to see if both answers matched. If the answers had been we haven’t had sex that would have sufficed. IMO I don’t take it to mean sex was required

I do agree with you on that. 

1 minute ago, E & J 2018 said:

It's actually a pretty clever question..... "Did you use a condom?"……. I don't think anyone would have rehearsed this question.....

haha nope. 

[Pitaya 2,577]

You have to hear one of the forum mods, TBone TX, tale of woe about his interview experience at the Guayaquil, Ecuador embassy... Hopefully, he will see your post and will respond.  He has some definite feelings about his encounters at the embassy there.

[Hank_ 9,174]

4 hours ago, kelly11anne said:

So we did our interview for the K1 visa years ago at the embassy in Guayaquil, Ecuador and ever since then I've been curious if our experience was normal. In the original interview we were asked for the date of when we started dating and since we are not big on that kind of thing, neither of us had an idea of the exact date and we just kind of looked at each other. That caused us to do a second round of separate interviews for them to compare our answers. During the separate interviews we were asked SUPER personal questions including when the last time we had sex was and if we had used a condom. In the moment I was really shocked and really uncomfortable, but answered anyway since I felt like the whole process was riding on it. Obviously we passed (here we are celebrating 8 years married tomorrow!) but I wanted to know if other people had this experience...

Ah you were introduced to the stokes interview.   From what I have heard the U.S. embassy in Ecuador is known to use that process more so than other embassies.

 

Ever see the movie Green Card .. there ya are, only in the movie it was nicer.

Edited September 23, 2019 by Hank_

[Lemonslice 4,885]

4 hours ago, E & J 2018 said:

It's actually a pretty clever question..... "Did you use a condom?"……. I don't think anyone would have rehearsed this question.....

If you are going to fake it, I am sure you will discuss contraception as it a very basic discussion most couples will have. Money, kids, and sex are probably the most common topics, with common goals/values... 

[implife 318]

4 hours ago, E & J 2018 said:

"Did you use a condom?"……. I don't think anyone would have rehearsed this question.....

well, actually... ☺️☺️☺️

[Dashinka 24,584]

3 hours ago, Pitaya said:

You have to hear one of the forum mods, TBone TX, tale of woe about his interview experience at the Guayaquil, Ecuador embassy... Hopefully, he will see your post and will respond.  He has some definite feelings about his encounters at the embassy there.

There is an easy way to make that happen.  Hey, @TBoneTX, take a look at this thread.

[geowrian 22,337]

6 hours ago, Russ&MaryAnn said:

I think they just wanted to see if both answers matched. If the answers had been we haven’t had sex that would have sufficed. IMO I don’t take it to mean sex was required

100% agree. They don't know the answer. They almost certainly don't care about the answer. They just want to see that answers match. Questions like this are usually something people remember clearly (or not...especially if not sober, which is a valid answer too!) and intentionally get people "off their game".

[SalishSea 17,916]

I doubt a stokes interview was conducted simply because the OP and spouse couldn't recall exact date of relationship start.  There must be some other issues there.

[kelly11anne 6]

I realize the reason for doing it, I was just surprised by the nature of the question. There were plenty of other questions asked that were, in my opinion, harder to "fake." As to another reason for them doing the Stokes interview, we had only been together as a couple for about a year and a half before the interview although we had known each other for longer. As I said, I guess it doesn't really matter since it was almost 9 years ago. I just wondered if anyone else who had done their interview there had a similar experience. 

[Russ&MaryAnn 110]

23 minutes ago, kelly11anne said:

I realize the reason for doing it, I was just surprised by the nature of the question. There were plenty of other questions asked that were, in my opinion, harder to "fake." As to another reason for them doing the Stokes interview, we had only been together as a couple for about a year and a half before the interview although we had known each other for longer. As I said, I guess it doesn't really matter since it was almost 9 years ago. I just wondered if anyone else who had done their interview there had a similar experience. 

I agree, that question was extreme, an invasion of privacy and IMO not necessary to validate the relationship. It seems if they suspect fraud they don’t have any boundaries. Glad you guys made it.