My fiance is diagnosed with cancer right before our K-1 visa plan. Looking for advice

[Abir_Here 1]

Hi everyone,

I'm 24, from Bangladesh, and I've been in a committed long-distance relationship for more than 4 years with my fiance, who is 74 and lives in the U.S. I know our age gap might seem unusual to some, but what we share is real love, built on deep connection, trust, and emotional support. I'm here because I need guidance; not just with the visa and immigration process, but also with the future of my personal life.

 

We met online and have talked almost every day since. We've stayed connected through long video calls, shared small gifts, and planned for a future together. We were preparing to apply for the K-1 fiance visa soon and had plans to finally meet in person. But recently, everything changed. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. It’s not operable, but the doctors said it's treatable with chemotherapy.

 

His lawyer said he will request a waiver for the in-person meeting requirement (since travel likely won’t be possible for him) and submit a request to expedite the visa process due to his condition. We haven't started the process yet. We are trying to stay hopeful, but everything feels uncertain now.

 

Over these years, I've made personal sacrifices to stay committed to this relationship emotionally, mentally, and in terms of life choices. I don't regret it, but now I'm scared. I had so many dreams of building a life with him. I still want to be with him, to support him, and if possible, continue my future in the U.S. and grow my career. But everything feels fragile.

 

 

What I'm hoping to learn:

 

Has anyone successfully expedited a K-1 visa due to a medical emergency?

 

How realistic is it to get the in-person meeting requirement waived?

 

What kind of evidence helps prove a long-distance relationship is genuine if we haven't met yet?

 

What are the chances (realistically, percentage-wise) that a K-1 visa would be approved in a case like ours, long-distance, no in-person meeting yet, and serious medical condition involved?

 

And more personally: what would you do in my situation? How do you stay emotionally strong when your future suddenly feels so uncertain?

 

 

If anyone has been through something similar, or can offer kind advice or encouragement, I'd be truly grateful. This relationship has meant everything to me, and I'm just trying to do the right thing in a very difficult moment.

 

Please don't judge my relationship based on your personal view because I can promise you that it's a genuine relationship based on love and respect. And I'm not here to convince you that.

 

Thank you so much for reading.

Edited 11 hours ago by Abir_Here
Added few info

[TBoneTX 47,542]

Sorry to hear of this misfortune.  Prayers for both of you.

 

Since 2007 on VisaJourney, I've never heard of a K-1 being expedited for the stated reasons.

I've never heard of the in-person meeting requirement's being waived, for ANY reason.

If he hasn't even filed the I-129F, I regret to report that you can forget both of these.

The chances are zero.

 

As to what I would do in your shoes:  Provide love and support from afar until the pancreatic cancer or the chemotherapy take their inevitable toll.  Prayers for both of you.

[mniceguy16 221]

2 hours ago, Abir_Here said:

Hi everyone,

I'm 24, from Bangladesh, and I've been in a committed long-distance relationship for more than 4 years with my fiance, who is 74 and lives in the U.S. I know our age gap might seem unusual to some, but what we share is real love, built on deep connection, trust, and emotional support. I'm here because I need guidance; not just with the visa and immigration process, but also with the future of my personal life.

 

We met online and have talked almost every day since. We've stayed connected through long video calls, shared small gifts, and planned for a future together. We were preparing to apply for the K-1 fiance visa soon and had plans to finally meet in person. But recently, everything changed. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. It’s not operable, but the doctors said it's treatable with chemotherapy.

 

His lawyer said he will request a waiver for the in-person meeting requirement (since travel likely won’t be possible for him) and submit a request to expedite the visa process due to his condition. We haven't started the process yet. We are trying to stay hopeful, but everything feels uncertain now.

 

Over these years, I've made personal sacrifices to stay committed to this relationship emotionally, mentally, and in terms of life choices. I don't regret it, but now I'm scared. I had so many dreams of building a life with him. I still want to be with him, to support him, and if possible, continue my future in the U.S. and grow my career. But everything feels fragile.

 

 

What I'm hoping to learn:

 

Has anyone successfully expedited a K-1 visa due to a medical emergency?

 

How realistic is it to get the in-person meeting requirement waived?

 

What kind of evidence helps prove a long-distance relationship is genuine if we haven't met yet?

 

What are the chances (realistically, percentage-wise) that a K-1 visa would be approved in a case like ours, long-distance, no in-person meeting yet, and serious medical condition involved?

 

And more personally: what would you do in my situation? How do you stay emotionally strong when your future suddenly feels so uncertain?

 

 

If anyone has been through something similar, or can offer kind advice or encouragement, I'd be truly grateful. This relationship has meant everything to me, and I'm just trying to do the right thing in a very difficult moment.

 

Please don't judge my relationship based on your personal view because I can promise you that it's a genuine relationship based on love and respect. And I'm not here to convince you that.

 

Thank you so much for reading.

Firstly, Bangladesh is a high fraud country, secondly you have a 50 year age gap (this alone is enough for you to be under the microscope at vetting levels), thirdly you have been in a 4 year relationship and have never met even once, furthermore, k1 path is not considered as an emergency to USCIS as you are not considered his immediate relative. Finally I know where you come from people at 74 still work in farms and do a lot of manual labor, in the States, these group of persons are seniors who are at the last legs of their lives and are very fragile (90% of them live in nursing homes, retirement homes, assisted living homes or if they live alone, they have some sort of home health aides). Summary is that your chances of having a life with this man in the States are near to 0% , he needs treatment now and I do not think the weight of immigration should be put on him at this point. My personal advise is for you to move on and not waste another 4 years of your time because USCIS will accept all your fees when filing and would definitely not give two flying flies about the urgency of your case.

Edited 9 hours ago by mniceguy16

[Abir_Here 1]

2 hours ago, mniceguy16 said:

Firstly, Bangladesh is a high fraud country, secondly you have a 50 year age gap (this alone is enough for you to be under the microscope at vetting levels), thirdly you have been in a 4 year relationship and have never met even once, furthermore, k1 path is not considered as an emergency to USCIS as you are not considered his immediate relative. Finally I know where you come from people at 74 still work in farms and do a lot of manual labor, in the States, these group of persons are seniors who are at the last legs of their lives and are very fragile (90% of them live in nursing homes, retirement homes, assisted living homes or if they live alone, they have some sort of home health aides). Summary is that your chances of having a life with this man in the States are near to 0% , he needs treatment now and I do not think the weight of immigration should be put on him at this point. My personal advise is for you to move on and not waste another 4 years of your time because USCIS will accept all your fees when filing and would definitely not give two flying flies about the urgency of your case.

Actually, we had few reasons for not being able to meet even though we wanted, such as COVID-19, recent collapse of Bangladesh government etc. 

Speaking about his health, compared to other men of his age he is very healthy. He manages his own things by himself and he is physically very active.

 

I'm not putting the weight of immigration on him. I even said that it's okay if he just wants to stay connected online and never meet because of this health issue. But he is the one who is saying that he'll do anything to make this happen. Again, we love each other very much. And I understand why he say that.

 

By the way, what did you mean by not wasting another four years? As far as I know, it takes around 14 months for a fiance visa process.

Edited 6 hours ago by Abir_Here
Typos

[smilingstone 624]

This is a very unfortunate story but there are so many red flags here.

[Crazy Cat 44,569]

8 hours ago, Abir_Here said:

And I'm not here to convince you that.

To be honest, you face an uphill battle on several fronts.  I have never seen a first meeting waiver granted.  @TBoneTX is right.  Chances are none.  You have a difficult path ahead. My advice is to focus on your future which doesn't involve marrying someone 50 years older than you.  Good luck. 

Edited 3 hours ago by Crazy Cat

[JeanneAdil 7,094]

2 hours ago, Abir_Here said:

Actually, we had few reasons for not being able to meet even though we wanted, such as COVID-19, recent collapse of Bangladesh government etc. 

Speaking about his health, compared to other men of his age he is very healthy. He manages his own things by himself and he is physically very active.

 

I'm not putting the weight of immigration on him. I even said that it's okay if he just wants to stay connected online and never meet because of this health issue. But he is the one who is saying that he'll do anything to make this happen. Again, we love each other very much. And I understand why he say that.

 

By the way, what did you mean by not wasting another four years? As far as I know, it takes around 14 months for a fiance visa process.

In answer to the section in bold print

i have gone thru big age gap issue -and even meeting and spending a month with him and family , our K1 was denied'

so, we married the next year

In total i made 5 trips and spent 10  months (2 trips were 3 months each) 

and in all in it was 6 years from the I 129 to I 130 to get Adil's visa

and both of us are in good health

 

with the drs saying his cancer is inoperatible,  and not even offering to remove the pancreas when a person can live without one,  i would think his chances are low to make the trip to meet 

If he is a smoker , or has diabetes along with his age,  his chances are even lower

 

About all u can do is give emotional support from afar as chances of visa are low

 

[JeanneAdil 7,094]

BTW our age difference was over 10 years and a concern for immigration but yours is huge / it is normal in your country for a young woman to marry a man who could be age of grandfather or great grandfather

Embassy considers the country's norms

[Boiler 47,507]

You have not explained why you have not met.

[JeanneAdil 7,094]

23 minutes ago, Boiler said:

You have not explained why you have not met.

Agree 

Covid was 5 years ago

21,22,23,24 and now 25 we can travel freely

[appleblossom 4,476]

5 hours ago, Abir_Here said:

Actually, we had few reasons for not being able to meet even though we wanted, such as COVID-19, recent collapse of Bangladesh government etc

 

Covid 19 isn't relevant if you have been together for 4 years - by 2021 you both could have travelled. And you could have met in a third country if Bangladesh wasn't safe. You won't get a waiver now for not meeting when you've had several years to do so. 

 

I'm really sorry to hear about your fiancé, but I agree with everybody else, time to let go of the plan you had and focus on the time you have left together, even if it's not in person.

 

Best of luck to you.