Bomb drop...in-laws want to immigrate to USA. HELP

[USC4SPOUSE 506]

11 hours ago, Scandi said:

The marriage can still be bonafide, and that's what matters. Tons of people in the world seek better lives in the US each year, the absolute majority find themselves an America spouse to get a better life AND their marriages are very much bonafide. Yes, you can have BOTH.

@Scandi I agree. You can have both. I see no issue with it. 

[USC4SPOUSE 506]

@Ryan76 It just occurred to me that if your sister in law is probably a good candidate to apply to immigrate to Canada. It is not a bad place to be unless she is 100% set in 'Merica.

[bdglen 31]

On 7/15/2021 at 8:29 AM, Ryan76 said:

 I'm American, married to a Colombian since 2012. We live in the US. We have a very happy marriage. And I am REALLY stressing out right now.

<snip>

 

I think you've gotten all the answers you need to move forward. So, I'm going to instead ask you a question. How did your MIL and SIL ever get visas to visit you so many times in the first place?  My Colombian  husband's relatives had tried numerous times to get tourist visas and have always been turned down. And they own multiple properties and have high paying jobs. How the heck did you get tourist visas?  Please let me know your secret as my husband would really like to have some of his relatives visit us, instead of us always going to Colombia.

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Edited July 20, 2021 by bdglen

[TBoneTX 43,058]

The OP can answer specifically.  In addition to firm ties to home, a good travel history is important.  Have your relatives visit another country or two (Ecuador will do, if they're admitting anyone) and return home.  Leave some time between the last U.S. tourist visa attempt and a subsequent one, then try again.

[Ryan76 46]

11 hours ago, bdglen said:

<snip>

 

I think you've gotten all the answers you need to move forward. So, I'm going to instead ask you a question. How did your MIL and SIL ever get visas to visit you so many times in the first place?  My Colombian  husband's relatives had tried numerous times to get tourist visas and have always been turned down. And they own multiple properties and have high paying jobs. How the heck did you get tourist visas?  Please let me know your secret as my husband would really like to have some of his relatives visit us, instead of us always going to Colombia.

 

Sorry it's been so difficult for you.  Honestly though, we didn't do anything special or different.  There were no lawyers involved. The family didn't have an extensive travel history.  I know for a fact that the MIL and BIL had never left Colombia. The SIL's employer paid for her to spend a month studying English in London, but i'm almost positive that was after she had a US Visa.

The sister owned an apartment and had a good job. MIL no job or property, BIL no job (at the time) and no property.

 

So other than providing the documents and any evidence required, we didn't do anything special.  I wish i could help more.  If there any other questions you have let me know.

[Ryan76 46]

So there are now a little over 3 weeks until MIL and SIL return home.  I am getting the feeling my wife and i aren't going to discuss any more of this until after they leave.  Plus i think my wife is finally starting to feel at least a little of the burden and stress of housing guests for so long. Maybe by the end of this she will realize that she doesn't want them living with us indefinitely in the future. They aren't really as organized or with the same level of self awareness as we are, and even my wife says sometimes they're like children.  The SIL just took an abrasive sponge to our stainless steel oven...literally scrubbed most of the numbers off 2 of the dials.  My wife wasn't thrilled .

 

There is one thing which i'm fairly certain has already been answered, but i just don't want any surprises when my wife and i discuss this again.

 

I understand the F4 category for SIL, 15-20 yr wait, and i understand a work visa wouldn't be permanent and they're very hard to get anyway (especially for someone who really can't speak English)...but is there anything else i am missing?   Could the SIL hire an immigration lawyer that could find some random category she could fit into and get to the US faster?

[.yana 586]

22 minutes ago, Ryan76 said:

Could the SIL hire an immigration lawyer

Yes

22 minutes ago, Ryan76 said:

that could find some random category she could fit into and get to the US faster?

No

[Ryan76 46]

41 minutes ago, .yana said:

Yes

No

Ha, thanks.  I hate asking all the questions.  Thanks for helping

[Eric-Pris 1,602]

On 7/18/2021 at 6:19 PM, Ryan76 said:

Interesting.  I kind of feel my situation will end up like that.

 

I mean, just the aspect of her mother. Over 60 with no money, will never be eligible for Medicaid, food here is more expensive, medical care and insurance more expensive, etc.

I don't think they are comprehending that the situation they have now is about as perfect as it can get, with her being able to be on her daughter's medical insurance in Colombia.  And we don't have several hundred extra dollars in our monthly budget to help.

What they told you their intentions are are wayyyy different than the real plan.  The real plan is for them to live with YOU and for YOU to support them permanently.  If the sister gets a job, it will be for her personal spending.  Your wife will have to "take care" of the mother because that's what good daughters do, which basically means that you'll be taking care of mom too.

 

Time to man up and put your foot down.  Yes, your wife may be a little upset but she'll get over it.  

 

Btw- something tells me that they won't believe you that it takes 14+ years for the sister to get a visa.  Your wife may accuse you of trying to discourage them from moving here (like it's that easy to just "move" here)--trust me on this one, i speak from experience.  They may suggest the whole tourist visa overstay route.  I would let them and then ICE would get an anonymous call about 2 illegals living at at a certain address.  Problem solved.  PERMANENTLY!

  

[Soloenta 2,218]

43 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

What they told you their intentions are are wayyyy different than the real plan.  The real plan is for them to live with YOU and for YOU to support them permanently.  If the sister gets a job, it will be for her personal spending.  Your wife will have to "take care" of the mother because that's what good daughters do, which basically means that you'll be taking care of mom too.

 

Time to man up and put your foot down.  Yes, your wife may be a little upset but she'll get over it.  

 

Btw- something tells me that they won't believe you that it takes 14+ years for the sister to get a visa.  Your wife may accuse you of trying to discourage them from moving here (like it's that easy to just "move" here)--trust me on this one, i speak from experience.  They may suggest the whole tourist visa overstay route.  I would let them and then ICE would get an anonymous call about 2 illegals living at at a certain address.  Problem solved.  PERMANENTLY!

  

  Hahaaaa, some may not like your post, but, your spot on!!  That is exactly what will happen.  I've seen it hapoen so many times I've lost count.  

It has often ended in divorce from meddling from those family members.  Better to nip this one in the bud!

 🙏👍🙏💗

Edited July 20, 2021 by Soloenta

[Soloenta 2,218]

2 hours ago, Ryan76 said:

  Could the SIL hire an immigration lawyer that could find some random category she could fit into and get to the US faster?

   God bless you, your trying to help and if it were to work you're right back where you don't want to be. 

  I would tell your SIL to learn English to were she can read, write, totally understand and have a conversation in English. Then she might get a work Visa. Seriously, RUNNNN!

[Ryan76 46]

54 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

 

 

Btw- something tells me that they won't believe you that it takes 14+ years for the sister to get a visa.  Your wife may accuse you of trying to discourage them from moving here 

  

Thanks to the good folks here i have that official newsletter they send out about wait times and such, which shows the wait times.  They are just now getting to Feb 2007 for the F4 category.

[Jay F 0]

You are over thinking this issue. First you have to consider if the income is enough for the economic support. Second you should try to put yourself in their shoes and treat them like you would treat you mother or your sister. I used to bring my in-laws to US for almost the whole 6 months each year, about 176 days and support all 3 while my wife was studying back then. Try that at least for 6 months. That will allow all of you, specially your wife to realized if they want to go thru this. In my case my inlaws felt they were happier in Colombia. Also try to set aside 2 or 3 hundred dollars to sent to your mother in law while she is in Colombia. She will see no reason to move to US, after all you took the woman she raise for you. Marriage envolves an engagement of 2 families, is one more way to show your wife how big is your love for her.

[Crazy Cat 39,224]

On 7/18/2021 at 7:56 PM, Bret L Smith said:

Tell the sister to look for an American Husband. I’m sure if she’s smart and has a good job in Columbia that she could attract a decent man here in the US. 
 

Marriage  for immigration benefits???  Seriously????

Edited November 17, 2021 by Crazy Cat

[RnJ2021 59]

Well, this old thread popped up and I read the whole thing. Some thoughts

- IMHO $1000/ month for health insurance is optimistic.

- If you follow International Living, Columbia is considered a desirable expat destination,

- If your wife is in logistics, she can probably work from Columbia.

- Depending on your work situation - perhaps moving to Columbia is a viable option.

- I work for the feds, so international remote is not an option for me. But once Jenya gets here, I'll take her to downtown Portland, Seattle, San Francisco: they look terrible compared to Odesa, Kyiv. . Perhaps when I retire, Ukraine will be an option for us,