Meeting Filipina - Need Help!

[Spheres 1]

4 minutes ago, Jorgedig said:

US immigration doesn't care about any of that type of minutiae, although it would be in your favor if she could be added to your health insurance.  

 

There are income parameters used to be able to sponsor an immigrant, and also to sponsor an immigrant's adjustment of status (green card).  See form I-864.  The criteria are becoming tougher as of 2/24/2020.

 

I'm surprised you're not finding anything about the public charge, as it is currently a hot topic, with threads all over VJ as well as the internet in general.

 

In a nutshell, when you sign that affidavit of support (I-864), you are making a contract with the US government to repay any public benefits she uses up until she has 40 quarters of work or becomes a USC.  This is in place as long as she remains in the US, even if you divorce.

 

I didn't mean I didn't find anything -- I meant I couldn't find a lot of specific criteria that must be met.  The only thing it says on the I-864 form is the table below (truncated for readability).  And that seems like an extremely low bar for income eligibility?  Or am I missing something?

 

That makes more sense about having to repay the public benefits -- she wouldn't be on any though if we are married, as we wouldn't qualify.  Or does she qualify on her own somehow?  I understand what you mean about divorce... yes, that's something I'll definitely consider.  Thanks!

 

Sponsor's Household Size	100% of HHS Poverty Guidelines*	125% of HHS Poverty Guidelines*
	For sponsors on active duty in the U.S. armed forces who are petitioning for their spouse or child	For all other sponsors
2	$16,910	$21,137
3	$21,330	$26,662

 

 

[Just Paul 4,591]

58 minutes ago, Spheres said:

I also forgot to mention she is in Cebu.  I'm not sure if that matters or not (i.e. isn't nearby Angeles City known for scammers??)

I still go to Philippines for work.  Next trip in this friday.  Cebu isn't anywhere near Angeles or Manila.  But scammers can be anywhere.  Cebu City is pretty modern and not as crowded as Manila.  I've found that the women from the provinces to be much more "genuine" the the ones in Manila.  My wife is actually from Bohol and island an hours plus by fairy.  My wife was working as a nanny at the time when we finally met.   

 

Take your time to meet and do some island hopping together.   Like I've told my son, you don;t really get to know someone until they don;t have wifi for a few days.

 

You don't need to do anything for her before or during immigration.  After we got married she returned to Manila while I figured out my next posting.   I did prepay for a room in a boarding house for 3 months and she had enough money to live on.  She learned to drive and did some english classes.  I came back in 30 days and about 45 days later we moved to Mexico for my work.

 

[Spheres 1]

3 minutes ago, Duke & Marie said:

Even without the graphic detail. This comment to suggest your not her first online or second BF! 

 

There are still till a lot of things many married couples don’t do on line. 

Yes that was my feeling as well.  She claims she never did it before.... but again, maybe this is common practice by Filipina to do this so readily on webcam?  Or maybe it isn't, and I found one who is just lying to me?  It's where I was hoping experience on the board could educate me, for better or worse.

[Boiler 43,543]

I am finding this an education.

[sl1pstream 551]

1 hour ago, Spheres said:

Ok thanks so much for for reading and responses -- I don't like to hear a lot of the advice so far, but maybe I need to.  So basically it sounds like I have been pretty dumb.  Just to explain further, I feel like if I were dating here in the USA, I'd have to spend considerable money on dining out and gifts as well.  So I wouldn't want to send this Filipina nothing if we are considered dating -- what kind of boyfriend would that be? 

I didn't send my girlfriend anything until after we met. Sending money to what essentially amounts to strangers who you sort of suspect to be scammers, otherwise you wouldn't be here, isn't being cheap. It's being smart.

 

It'd also be super cool if transphobia was left out of this thread or these forums in general. Thanks, all.

Edited February 18, 2020 by sl1pstream

[Just Paul 4,591]

If things go well while you are there there are two things you can do:

 

Ask to meet her mother/family.   If she is doing a scam she probably won't want her mother to meet you.  

 

Or tell here you like it so much you are thinking of retiring there.  If she says she really wants to move to the US instead, proceed with caution. 

 

When I told Mary we can move to Mexico right away, even before filing for the US, she said she would live anywhere with me.   Now she has two green cards and 3 driver's licenses.

 

[Just Paul 4,591]

1 hour ago, Spheres said:

I feel like if I were dating here in the USA, I'd have to spend considerable money on dining out and gifts as well.  So I wouldn't want to send this Filipina nothing if we are considered dating -- what kind of boyfriend would that be?

Your not dating . . . you have an online relationship

[Spheres 1]

 

5 minutes ago, Paul & Mary said:

If things go well while you are there there are two things you can do:

 

Ask to meet her mother/family.   If she is doing a scam she probably won't want her mother to meet you.  

 

Or tell here you like it so much you are thinking of retiring there.  If she says she really wants to move to the US instead, proceed with caution. 

 

When I told Mary we can move to Mexico right away, even before filing for the US, she said she would live anywhere with me.   Now she has two green cards and 3 driver's licenses.

 

 

Yes I did video with her mother - and she wants me to meet them quickly after I land.  She said maybe the whole family will greet me at the airport.  This is a good sign then?

[Ontarkie 13,918]

~~Moved to the PI forum, from K1 P&P - the OP is asking about norms in the PI and not about K1 Processing.~~

[Spheres 1]

17 minutes ago, sl1pstream said:

I didn't send my girlfriend anything until after we met. Sending money to what essentially amounts to strangers who you sort of suspect to be scammers, otherwise you wouldn't be here, isn't being cheap. It's being smart.

 

13 minutes ago, Paul & Mary said:

Your not dating . . . you have an online relationship

Ok points taken.  I don't want this to become a debate, but to me every relationship is different.  No we're not dating in the traditional sense of the word, since we're separated by over 8000 miles of earth and water.  And by no means do I mean chatting online always means you're in a relationship, or that you should immediately treat them like a girlfriend.  I chatted others before her from the dating site that I never sent money, but we only chatted a short time.  But I do think it's also possible to have someone that you consider a 'girlfriend' that you haven't met, in that you are promising each other that you'll focus solely on that relationship, if that makes sense. 

 

And even if I meet her, does that automatically mean she isn't a scammer?  She could just be using me for a Visa for all I know, too.  And while she has said that she'd live anywhere with me, I have no way to know if that is true or not.  Again, I don't believe she's a scammer (I just am paranoid from what I've read online), but if you all tell me she sounds like one, then I'll definitely reconsider my position.

 

Edited February 18, 2020 by Spheres

[RUJEN 139]

I was in your shoes a year ago, I met a Flipina from Leyte on Facebook, we chatted twice a day for 7-8 months before I went to meet her, I go to Cebu  every year for vacation anyhow, so I had her meet me there. I read all the warning signs and "do's and don'ts" and what to expect from a province girl.

The whole time we chatted, she never asked for money except for when it was time to go to Cebu to meet me, she wanted boat money (very understandable)....

While I was there, I had her get 3 copies of her birth certificate, 3 copies of her husbands death certificate, 4 copies of a passport photo and her letter of intent (which I made 2 copies of that)....

Thanks to these great people here on VJ, I was able to read ahead of time to know what papers I needed if I planned on doing the K1 process.

I can warn you to beware of Cebu city women, most are genuine sweet women but there are many scammers too and they are good at it.

best of luck to you......

[Spheres 1]

7 minutes ago, RUJEN said:

I was in your shoes a year ago, I met a Flipina from Leyte on Facebook, we chatted twice a day for 7-8 months before I went to meet her, I go to Cebu  every year for vacation anyhow, so I had her meet me there. I read all the warning signs and "do's and don'ts" and what to expect from a province girl.

The whole time we chatted, she never asked for money except for when it was time to go to Cebu to meet me, she wanted boat money (very understandable)....

While I was there, I had her get 3 copies of her birth certificate, 3 copies of her husbands death certificate, 4 copies of a passport photo and her letter of intent (which I made 2 copies of that)....

Thanks to these great people here on VJ, I was able to read ahead of time to know what papers I needed if I planned on doing the K1 process.

I can warn you to beware of Cebu city women, most are genuine sweet women but there are many scammers too and they are good at it.

best of luck to you......

 

Perfect!  This is the type of info i was looking for specifically.  So by obtaining those documents you listed, it helped to expedite the process of getting K1, because you didn't have to try to send via mail back and forth?  Is there anything else you can think of besides what you listed:

• 3 Copies of her Birth Certificate
• 3 Copies of Divorce or Death certificates
• 4 Copies of her passport photo (2x2 I presume still)
• 2 Copies of signed Letter of Intent

Is there anything else she needs to give me?  Do I need to give her anything on my end like Divorce/Death certificates or Financial info?

 

Edited February 18, 2020 by Spheres

[SalishSea 16,806]

29 minutes ago, Spheres said:

 

Perfect!  This is the type of info i was looking for specifically.  So by obtaining those documents you listed, it helped to expedite the process of getting K1, because you didn't have to try to send via mail back and forth?  Is there anything else you can think of besides what you listed:

• 3 Copies of her Birth Certificate
• 3 Copies of Divorce or Death certificates
• 4 Copies of her passport photo (2x2 I presume still)
• 2 Copies of signed Letter of Intent

Is there anything else she needs to give me?  Do I need to give her anything on my end like Divorce/Death certificates or Financial info?

 

FYI, this isn't any sort of official list.  It is just what that person assembled.  And all of those items can be sent electronically, including the signed letter of intent.

[SalishSea 16,806]

1 hour ago, sl1pstream said:

It'd also be super cool if transphobia was left out of this thread or these forums in general. Thanks, all.

Where are you seeing transphobia here?

[Cyberfx1024 7,978]

1 hour ago, sl1pstream said:

It'd also be super cool if transphobia was left out of this thread or these forums in general. Thanks, all.

Nobody here is being transphobic at all. But you have to understand that this is a VERY big thing issue in the Philippines and usually quite accepted. They have pageants in the towns and baranguy's to celebrate the beauty of Women and Trans-Women.

Edited February 18, 2020 by Cyberfx1024