Getting Married

[Gracey 0]

Good day everyone!

I have been in a relationship with my American boyfriend for almost 3 years now. He will come visit next year and he told me that he wants us to get married here in Philippines, a civil wedding probably. I would like to ask if it is possible for us to get married even if it is just the first time that we meet? 

I would appreciate any answers. Thank you and have nice day!

Edited July 20, 2019 by Gracey

[Daphne . 1,888]

you would not be the first to get married on the first trip and also not the last.. 

When applying for a spousal visa, it is also very important to provide evidence of a bonafide marriage. A big part of that evidence is time spent together (and with this I actually mean in the same country). So this would mean as many visits as possible, the fact that you have been ‘together’ for 3 years but have not met in person yet will have to change if possible after marriage. Try to spend as much time together with as many visits as possible. Just simply being married might not cut it when applying for the spousal visa..

 

 

[Gracey 0]

1 hour ago, Gracey said:

Good day everyone!

I have been in a relationship with my American boyfriend for almost 3 years now. He will come visit next year and he told me that he wants us to get married here in Philippines, a civil wedding probably. I would like to ask if it is possible for us to get married even if it is just the first time that we meet? 

I would appreciate any answers. Thank you and have nice day!

I want to ask also, Are you married to an American citizen? How many times did you meet before you got married? 

[Daphne . 1,888]

12 minutes ago, Gracey said:

I want to ask also, Are you married to an American citizen? How many times did you meet before you got married? 

Yes, I am married to a US citizen. We have had about 12 meetings in total.

We got married after knowing each other for 2 years and we saw each other 6 times before getting married. After marriage another 6 times.

This is different for each couple, so this is not a must.

But getting married is a serious commitment, I would not be able to marry somebody I have only seen once but that is my opinion.

Also, if Immigration gets in the mix (I assume you want to move to the US?) the situation gets even more serious. 

[Going through 5,671]

3 hours ago, Gracey said:

Good day everyone!

I have been in a relationship with my American boyfriend for almost 3 years now. He will come visit next year and he told me that he wants us to get married here in Philippines, a civil wedding probably. I would like to ask if it is possible for us to get married even if it is just the first time that we meet? 

I would appreciate any answers. Thank you and have nice day!

Is it possible?  Yes.  Although many would advise getting to know a person "in person" for a bit longer before committing to marriage.    

 

How long is he planning on visiting you for?  

[Gracey 0]

54 minutes ago, Going through said:

Is it possible?  Yes.  Although many would advise getting to know a person "in person" for a bit longer before committing to marriage.    

 

How long is he planning on visiting you for?  

15 to 20 days. Is it short? We feel like we've known each other so well.

[Gracey 0]

2 hours ago, Daphne K said:

Yes, I am married to a US citizen. We have had about 12 meetings in total.

We got married after knowing each other for 2 years and we saw each other 6 times before getting married. After marriage another 6 times.

This is different for each couple, so this is not a must.

But getting married is a serious commitment, I would not be able to marry somebody I have only seen once but that is my opinion.

Also, if Immigration gets in the mix (I assume you want to move to the US?) the situation gets even more serious. 

I plan on living with him after we get married but that will take time of course because of immigration laws and everything..

[Going through 5,671]

14 minutes ago, Gracey said:

15 to 20 days. Is it short? We feel like we've known each other so well.

Knowing each other online is different than meeting in person.  I spoke to my husband for 9 months online/phone only before we met in person the first time.  We then carried a long-distance relationship for 3 years before we got married, after seeing each other in person and spending time together as often as we could.  Some trips were a couple of weeks, some only 3 or 4 days.  It was during our physical visits back and forth where we got a taste of what each other was like in person and whether we really clicked as a couple.  And it was also during our physical visits that we met each others' family members and friends.   It was easier for us to visit back and forth because our borders are closer together, obviously, and also less expensive in traveling.

 

I could never seeing myself marrying a person and making a life-long commitment to that person after a first visit, but it does happen---and there are successful marriages that come from that.  I wish you luck.

Edited July 20, 2019 by Going through

[Daphne . 1,888]

7 minutes ago, Gracey said:

I plan on living with him after we get married but that will take time of course because of immigration laws and everything..

I understand but even though you feel that you know each other so well, you will only find that out after spending time together (and I would suggest before getting married..).

 

i wanted to be able to really know my husband before I married him. How he would be around family & friends, how he treated staff at a store or a restaurant, how he reacted to certain situations, what his habits were when he was at home. You are not able to experience that from a distance.

 

No matter how much you message or videocall somebody, it’s things like the ones I mentioned above that will give you a good idea about your future spouse. 

 

I probably have been reading too many posts here on VJ where people say that their spouse completely changed after they started living together. While this can be genuine in certain cases, it could also be that the person they were in a long distance relationship was genuine but it is just a very limited way of really getting to know somebody.

[Lil bear 4,251]

23 minutes ago, Gracey said:

15 to 20 days. Is it short? We feel like we've known each other so well.

My opinion and experience only. Married 42 going on 43 years ... still married . 

Trust me .. you don’t know him. 

[JFH 12,190]

2 hours ago, Gracey said:

I plan on living with him after we get married but that will take time of course because of immigration laws and everything..

So he’s staying with you in the Philippines? Or are you planning to come here? If you’re coming here it will take more than a year. 

[JFH 12,190]

5 hours ago, Gracey said:

I want to ask also, Are you married to an American citizen? How many times did you meet before you got married? 

I’m also married to a US citizen. We had over 40 visits before I emigrated. About 25 of them before marriage. Before I move across the world, sell my house, leave my (good) job, sell my car, etc I want to be sure he’s right for me. 

 

Ask yourself if you’d marry someone from another city in your country after just 15 days. Add to that the cultural and language differences. Do you have a big age gap also? Then you’ll start to see why people recommend multiple visits. 

[Ryan H 3,812]

Moved from K3 Process & Procedures to Philippines regional forum.

[Hank_ 9,174]

16 hours ago, Gracey said:

Good day everyone!

I have been in a relationship with my American boyfriend for almost 3 years now. He will come visit next year and he told me that he wants us to get married here in Philippines, a civil wedding probably. I would like to ask if it is possible for us to get married even if it is just the first time that we meet? 

I would appreciate any answers. Thank you and have nice day!

Of course you can get married.   You do have to follow the process for obtaining the marriage license, which includes a 10 day waiting period.  Do check with your local registry for details.

 

 

[Just Paul 4,595]

16 hours ago, Gracey said:

Are you married to an American citizen?

We married after a year - 4 visits, the longest being a month.