Interview from HELL!

[Jon York 156]

My fiancee just had the harshest interview in Islamabad that I’ve ever read about! Please excuse the length of this post but I feel it may be helpful to some in preparing for their interview. Especially for non-Muslim American males who are petitioning for a non-Muslim fiancee in a Muslim country. It also sheds a lot of light on how COs think and what kind of tactics they may use in a difficult interview.

I so wish somebody had posted something like this before our interview. It would have really helped us to be better prepared. But most of the interview took us both by complete surprise. Mostly because I had told her there would probably only be four or five simple questions. Although fortunately, we did go through a lot more questions during our interview prep – just in case. But we didn’t go into as much depth as we could have had I had any idea some interviews could be like this.

Obviously COs have a strong opinion before you ever come in for your interview as to whether they’re going to approve or deny your petition. Every now and then though they just aren’t sure either way. And they can sometimes be persuaded to change their minds. And in our case, they really took the time to go through all our evidence before making their final decision.

Usually if they’ve already decided someone should be approved, the interview is very short and rudimentary. And probably about the same if they’ve already decided the person should be denied. But if it’s a case where they’re really just not sure, the interview will probably be very long and unpleasant. That was the case for our interview.

To their credit though – they were unsure – but they took a lot of time to look at every detail of our case and our evidence. At one point they took our evidence of a continuing relationship back into their office and stayed there for over an hour studying it. We knew this because when they came back they asked questions that they could have only known to ask because of something that was written in our continuing evidence. When I was putting together our packet of continuing evidence, I really didn’t think they were going to do anything more than just glance at it. But fortunately, I put together a solid package anyway, showing all the key moments in our relationship since we filed the petition. I’m really glad they took the time to look at it because I think it was pretty convincing.

Also, my fiancee decided on her own that she was going to print out about a hundred more pictures from the one time we met in person and take those with her. At first I told her I didn’t think that was necessary because they were pictures from the same trip that we had already sent them pictures from. I thought they wanted to see pictures from additional trips – but we didn’t have any additional trips together. My fiancee said she was going to do it anyway and I said okay then, no problem. I had no idea that those pictures would be the primary thing that would totally change the the course of the interview!

To those who say you don’t need to include many pictures – that is probably true in most cases. But in a case where there might be any doubts or suspicions on the part of the CO – you should include absolutely as many photos as you possibly can.

We also included 2-3 Skype screenshots of us talking per month, and we included screenshots of Facebook conversations. I was careful to include some conversations where we were talking about serious things – other than the typical “I love you, I love you” messages. I included some of those too – but not too many. I wanted them to see we had other things to talk about. I also included messages where they could see we have a serious relationship and that we have involved each other intimately in our lives, even from such a great distance, and that we discuss a lot of other things besides just the “I love you” mushy conversations.

I also included screenshots of two or three Facebook conversations where I was writing back and forth to some of my friends about our engagement and pending marriage. It showed that I was telling others about it and that they believed we were really engaged to be married. At the time I was putting all this together though I was hoping they would look at it because I knew it was very persuasive, but I thought they’d probably only glance at it and not really pick up the key points. I had no idea that they’d actually read ALL of it! But they did! So don’t be cavalier about what you put together thinking they may not even ask to see it. If there’s any chance you’ll have problems, then put together a serious and strong package proving that you do have a real relationship.

THE INTERVIEW

I had advised my fiancee to ask to have the interview conducted in Urdu. Not because she can’t speak English pretty well, but because if she missed a small detail of some questions, she might mistakenly give the wrong answer. Or, her answer may not be precise enough for them to understand what she really meant. So, for something as important as this interview, I wanted to make sure she understood the specifics and the nuances of each question and that she could answer accurately in her native language. And I knew she could supervise the translator and make sure he translated it accurately into English.

One thing that surprised me about the interview is that we have a co-sponsor and I thought they were going to raise all kinds of questions about that. But they never even mentioned it! That wasn’t a problem for them at all.

When she got to the embassy, she had to sit and wait pretty much until the end of the day before they saw her. She was one of the last people they called. That’s a bad sign. They apparently want to get all the easy interviews out of the way for the day so they can spend a lot of time on the difficult ones. After sitting there for several hours she was finally called to a window and given a 25-minute interview in Urudu with a female American officer. At the end of this interview, the CO told her point blank, “I don’t believe you. I don’t believe your case is a genuine relationship.” I found it surprising yet refreshing that she was that transparent about what she was thinking! So many people get denied and they have no idea why. If we were going to be denied, at least from this one comment alone we would have had a clue as to why.

She was then asked to go back and sit down and wait. You can imagine how terrified she felt after just being told that the officer didn’t believe our case was genuine! She had to wait for a little over an hour and then was called to go into an office (behind the windows) where two COs awaited, a Flipina American woman (who I will refer to as Fili CO from here on out) and a Pakistani American man (who I will refer to as Pak CO from here on out).

When she got to this second round of the interview, the Pak CO told her, “I’m sorry, but we will do the rest of the interview in English. Is that a problem for you?” She said, absolutely not. I think she really wanted to do it in English in the first place to show them that she spoke well enough to communicate easily with me. So she didn’t mind this at all.

They had had major problems with our petition which they were kind enough to let her know about. The problems were very specific to our case, which as it turns out was a highly unusual case for Islamabad to see. I really thought we were okay going into the interview. We met all of the requirements. We had met in person just a year earlier and we have a genuine love relationship and we had plenty of evidence to prove it. But I was totally blindsided by the problems the Embassy had with our petition and relationship.

I knew it wasn’t a typical Pakistani kind of relationship – but I had no idea that it would be so deeply frowned upon by Pakistani culture. We had prepared pretty well for the interview and we even prepared for many of the questions they asked her. But we could have prepared every day for 10 years and neither one of us would have seen coming what happened next. I didn’t see it because I didn’t realize how very deeply difficult it would be for the typical Pakistani family to accept a relationship like ours. I knew it wasn’t the norm, but I had no idea it was practically forbidden! And she didn’t see it coming because she had no idea the Americans would care so much about that.

They had one major problem – they didn’t believe we had told the truth about our relationship and they had five reasons why they didn’t:

I had never come to Pakistan to meet her and her family. Highly unusual in a country where arranged marriages still rule the day and where fiance/fiancees don’t usually meet until the day of their wedding – and almost never meet until at least they’ve met the parents.

Age difference – She kept telling them she didn’t care about our age difference (30 years), but the American officer finally told her, “It’s a VERY BIG issue for us madam.”

They couldn’t believe her parents would let her come to America to meet a man she wasn’t married to. And they couldn’t believe her parents would allow her to marry me without having first met me in person? This goes very much against the grain of Pakistani and Muslim cultures in general. (I did meet her Dad in person, but no one else in her family).

Because of the above, they suspected we were already married!

Or, they suspected I was just marrying her as a way to help her get out of Pakistan!

The Fili CO and the Pak CO went back and forth asking her questions and coming around 20 minutes later to ask the same questions again and again in a slightly different way each time.

IMPORTANT: In her first 25-miute interview with the woman at the window, the CO kept referring to me as her husband. Thankfully I had warned her about that – and each time she corrected her and said, “No, he’s my fiance!” A good thing too – because it came out during the second interview that they thought we were already married. If she had a single time not corrected the woman when she called me her husband, I’m sure they would have immediately denied her on the grounds that she had just confirmed that we were already married.

THE QUESTIONS:

They called her to Window 6 and they asked her what language she wanted her interview in. She said Urudu (as I had advised her). This 25-minute portion of the interview was conducted by an female American CO.

She asked:

Who is calling you from the United States?

My fiance, *name* - (she replied in English)

What does your husband do for a living?

He is not my husband. He is my fiance. The woman said “oh sorry.” We had practiced this question – thanks to VisaJourney!

What does your fiance do for a living?

She told them what I do and the name of my company.

How did you meet?

On Facebook.

The woman looked at her like she didn’t believe it. She said, “How can people meet on facebook, you have to explain that to me – how you became facebook friends... who added who?”

We had a common friend and he sent me a friend request. I looked at his posts on facebook and thought he was okay so I accepted. He was a Christian too and I liked what he posted on his page.

“I don’t believe this! Who was your common friend, can you please tell me about that?”

She named some of our mutual friends.

Are they all from the USA?

No, they are from many different countries, USA, Indonesia, Europe.

Then she gave her a piece of paper and asked her to write the names of our mutual friends! She could only think of three at the time so she wrote down those three.

Then she asked, “How can your family let you go alone to the United States with a total stranger?”

He’s not a stranger, he is my fiance.

But he’s not your husband.

That’s right, but he will be just a few days after I arrive.

(All of this goes against Pakistani culture. A normal Pakistani family would never let their daughter go to another country to be with a man unless he had married her first. So they had legitimate grounds for these questions).

What does your family think about this? Do they agree?

My father not agree with this at first. My father said, “I have to meet him in person, then I will tell you whether I agree.” So when we meet him in person, papa liked him very much.

In these types of cases, your fiance has to come to Pakistan and marry you. Your family is over here.

It’s hard to bring him over here.

Really!? So you’re going to marry him over there? Is your family going to the wedding?

No! I wish they could come, but it’s not possible to bring them over there.

How can you marry him if your family is not there?

They will watch on Skype.

Why doesn’t he come to Pakistan and let his family watch on Skype? You are making your case so hard for me.
If my visa isn’t approved, he will come here and marry me. But our plan is to get married over there.

Where is your fiance’s Affidavit of Support? The one you just gave me is a copy of his signature, not the original. I need the original signature.

It’s in the file I sent you before the interview.

CO asks a man in the office to look for the file. He found it. My original signature was there and this is the only mention they made about my finances. No other questions were asked about them.

Do you have any Skype calls, pictures or any other evidence of a continuing relationship? My fiancee began to pull out several notebooks from her bag and the Fili CO said, “Please, just give me everything you have.”

Fiancee gave her everything, including pictures, original receipts, etc., etc. She also gave her the ATM card that I had given her last year so she could withdraw money (and so I wouldn’t have to go to Western Union every time I wanted to send her some). The CO said, “Don’t give me your ATM card! I’m not going to take that!”

CO then said, “Please, you to go sit down and wait now, I have to check all things and make sure this case is genuine.” My fiancee sat down and waited for about an hour. They looked at all our photos, read the captions and read through all our conversations.

Fiancee waited about an hour while many other people came and went and got approved or denied.

When everyone else had finished and left, her number popped up on the screen and said go to Room #6, not Window 6. (It’s not a good sign if you’re taken into a room)!

When she got into Room #6 there was the female Filipino/American CO (Fili CO) and the male Pakistani/American CO (Pak CO). When she got into the room, Pak CO got up and closed the door. Then Pak CO, said, with a very serious face, “Your interview has to be in English.” My fiancee said, “No problem.”

They started questioning her and playing off of each other like Bad Cop/Bad Cop!

Fili CO: We don’t understand how you became Facebook friends, so you have to explain this more, please. Who sent who the first message?

I did.

Pak Co: Who was your mutual friend?

It was my fiance’s pastor.

Fili CO: How can you send a stranger a message? (I guess that’s not an accepted thing for a Pakistani woman to do).

I sent that message to many of my facebook friends to ask for prayer for Pakistan because at that time (September 2012), Pakistan was erupting in violence and things were getting very dangerous for Christians here. They were burning churches and killing pastors.

Pak CO: with a very serious face asked mockingly, “Oh Really? So tell me again who your mutual friend was?”

It was my fiance’s pastor.

Fili CO: Can you tell me when you first contacted him.

September 22^nd, 2012. It’s all in the papers we sent you.

(We both knew this date very well and I had included a screenshot of this, our very first facebook conversation with our initial petition).

Pak CO: You cannot look at these papers, just tell us from your memory.

So, she told them the same answer again.

Pak CO: We can’t trust that, can you please explain it again and give the dates. (The whole time he’s writing notes and Fili CO is writing notes as well).

She answers again and gives the date again of the first time she contacted me.

Pak CO: How did you become friends with your fiance’s pastor on Facebook?

He’s a Christian pastor and I added him.

Fili CO: How do you add people to be your friends?”

Then Pak CO turned to the Fili CO and said, “Can you do that as a Christian woman Fili CO? Can you just add friends because you’re a Christian and you can add Christian friends?”

Fili CO: “NO!”

Then he turned back to fiancee and asked her the same question.

I have lots of brothers and sisters on facebook who are Christians.

Pak CO: REALLY!? So how many ‘brothers’ have proposed to you!!!???”

My Fiancee stunned: What!? None!

Pak CO: How many affairs have you had on Facebook? How many ‘brothers’ have become your boyfriend!?”

Just my fiance only!

Then Pak CO brought up our age difference and asks how old I am. Fiancee is so nervous at this point she makes a slip of the tongue and accidentally adds 2 years to my age! But catches herself and then gives the correct age.

Pak CO: “Okay.”
This was the third time she had been asked about our ages.

Fili CO: I think you are too young for him, how can you marry him – there’s a 30 year difference.

That’s just a number for me, I love him.

Fili CO: But it’s a BIG matter for us madam.

I don’t have any problem about it.

Fili CO: “OK.” (said very rudely)

Fili CO: How many brothers and sisters does your fiance have?

Just one sister.

Fili CO: Do you know her name?

Yes (and she told her my sister’s name).

Fili CO: Where do his parents live?

She told them where my parents live.

Fili CO: Why didn’t your fiance and his father come to Pakistan and you get married over here?

His father is 87 years old and it would be too difficult for him to travel here. (We had actually prepared for this question beforehand, never thinking that it would actually be asked).

Pak CO: Why can’t your fiance and his family come over here for marriage? It’s not possible for him to come?”

Because we planned to get married in America on my fiance visa. But if visa not approved, he will come here to marry me.

Fili CO: How can your parents let you go over there and stay with him when you’re not even married?

My parents trust him and I’m not going to stay with him until after we get married. I will be staying with a friend of his.

Pak CO: Who is his friend?

Linda

Fili CO: What’s her last name?

I don’t know.

Fili CO: Does she live alone?

No.

Fili CO: Who does she live with?

Her sister.

Fili CO: What’s her sister’s name?

I don’t know.

Pak CO: How does your fiance know Linda.

They go to the same church.

Fili CO: So tell me, where does Linda live?

In New York.

Pak CO: So have you talked to Linda?

Yes.

Fili CO: So, I can’t believe your fiance has never been married! He must have been married sometime!

No he’s never been married!

Fili CO: smiled and said, “You don’t know anything about American men. He’s been divorced I know it. How many kids does he have?”

How could he have any kids? He’s never been married!

Fili CO: I can’t believe he’s never been married. He’s too old, how could he live in America and never been married. So tell me the truth, how many kids does he have!?

I am telling you the truth. He’s never been married and he doesn’t have any kids!

Fili CO: Are you sure he’s never been married and doesn’t have any kids.

I see him on live camera every single day and whenever I want I call him. If he had kids I would have seen them sometime. Or he wouldn’t have taken my call sometime, but he always takes my call.

Fili CO: Tell me, did you propose to him or did he propose to you?

He proposed to me.

Fili CO: How did he do it?

He did it on Skype and it was so cute because he was so nervous!

Fili CO: So when did you fall in love with him? When did you think you were in a relationship with him?’

After a couple of months.

Fili CO: I ASKED YOU WHEN!? GIVE ME A DATE!

January, 2013.

Fili CO: After you started to fall in love with him, did you keep calling him “brother”? (She had always called me “brother” in our earliest conversations – which they had obviously read).

No!

Pak CO: I’m totally not understanding how you became Facebook friends, so tell me again and give me the dates.

Fiancee tells him again (for the 4^th or 5^th time), that we met on Facebook and tries to explain how we got connected to each other.

Pak CO: So you don’t have any relatives in America?

No. (In most cases having relatives in America can go against you because they think you’re going to go there, move in with your relatives and never go back. But in our case it was a disadvantage because they couldn’t understand how her parents could allow her to come here alone to be with a man she wasn’t married to. If she had relatives here that would have made them a little more comfortable with the whole thing).

Pak CO: So how can you go totally alone and live with a strange person in America!?

He’s not a stranger... he’s my fiancee!

(This was the crux of their suspicion. It’s not the traditional Pakistani way for a woman to meet her fiance before the wedding. But it’s virtually unheard of for a single Pakistani girl to go to meet a man in a foreign country without their first being married! So they really thought we must have already been married or her parents wouldn’t let her come. And that is totally true for most Pakistani parents. But her parents are Christians so although they’re happy to go along with Pakistani culture in a lot of ways, they also don’t mind doing things differently as long as it doesn’t contradict Biblical teachings. And going to a foreign country to marry a man, as long as you don’t sleep with him before the wedding, doesn’t contradict any Biblical teaching. But still I can see why the COs thought this was highly unusual. It is!)

Fili CO: Tell me about your past jobs.

She mentions each job briefly and they didn't ask her anymore questions about that.

Fili CO: What does your father do?

He’s retired.

Fili CO: Oh really? So he’s retired?

Yes! He’s retired!

Pak CO: Who arranged the trip to Dubai?

My fiance did.

Pak CO: Did you stay in the same room with your fiance?

No.

(This was another question designed to figure out if we were already married or not. A Pakistani girl, Christian, Muslim or otherwise, simply would not be allowed to stay in the same room with a man she wasn’t married to. And in fact, that’s not allowed in Dubai or any Muslim country either. And since her father was with us on this trip – they knew there was no getting around that. They knew her father simply wouldn’t allow it. If she had answered yes to this question, they probably would have denied the visa. Fortunately, we did have separate rooms, so that question was easy).

Fili CO: Who arranged the booking? (For the second time)

My fiance did.

Fili CO: When did your father approve of your fiance?

Before he met him he told me he could not approve until he met him first. When we both met him in Dubai, papa liked him very much right at the first. And the next day he told me he approved of him.

Fili CO: So tell me when did he propose to you? (for the 15^th time)!

March 27^th, 2013

Pak CO: So tell me, what do you talk about every day on Skype?

We talk about what we did during the day, we pray together for friends who have big problems in their lives, etc., etc.

Pak CO: So when did you first start to feel romantic with him?

Right after he proposed to me.

Fili CO: So you were just brothers and sisters before and then suddenly you have romantic feelings for him?

No we had became like friends.

About this time, my fiancee was about to start crying, but the grilling continued.

Pak CO: So when did you fall in love with him?

I started feeling that way in January, 2013. I started to feel love for him while we were talking on Skype.

Pak CO: skeptically, “REALLY???”

Yes, really!

Fili CO: So tell me, where does he live?

She told her where I live.

Fili CO: How long has he been living there?

I don’t know, a long time. Then she tried to guess (and she guessed way wrong), she said, “I don’t know, I think it was since 1996.” Then the CO suddenly started giving her a little help and said:

Fili CO: If you don’t know, just say you don’t know.

Okay, I don’t know. He’s told me before but I don’t remember, but it was a long time.

Fili CO: How long has your fiance been working for himself?

I don’t know but it’s been a long time.

Pak CO: Do you know his company’s name?

Yes, and she said the name.

Pak CO: Do you know how to spell it?

No, but it’s in the file!

Fili CO: Where was your fiance born?

In America.

Fili CO: Oh, so he’s not Pakistani or something else, he’s pure American?”

Yes.

(I think this was another thing that helped us. Because if I had been Pakistani/American or from some other Muslim country, then they would not have expected us to have met like we did. But since I really am “pure” (as they put it) American, I think at this point they started to understand that I didn’t know about all these customs so instead of trying to abide by them, I was actually unknowingly influencing her to go somewhat against them).

Fili CO asked (three times) when and where are you going to marry.

In New York.

Pak CO: NO!!! WHERE IN NEW YORK!!??”

At his church.

Pak CO How many people are going to be there?

About 20.

Then they start asking yet again about when I proposed to her and the dates that other various things happened. (She knew all the dates by heart, so that was no problem).

Fili CO: Did he have a girlfriend before you met him?

Yes

Fili CO: When did he break up with her?

Two months before we met.

Fili CO: Do you know her name?

Yes (and she told her her first name)

Fili CO: He’s lying to you that he’s not married!

He’s not married, I watch him every day. I can even see him in his car and in his living room. If somebody comes to see him, I would know that.

(I had had a security camera installed with my security system about a year ago. And I gave her the login so she could watch it anytime she wanted – so that she would know for sure that nothing was going on. That came in really handy on these questions, because it gave her the absolute certainty that she was right and they were wrong. If she had wavered on this question at all, it could have been bad for us).

Pak CO: How my “brothers” have become your boyfriend and how many have you fallen in love with!?”

Then Fili CO says, “You mean you have Christian brothers and sisters?”

Yes, that’s exactly what I mean! He was my brother in Christ. Just like Muslims call each other brother.

(The Filipina CO here was actually helping her here to clarify for the Pakistani CO that just like in Islam, in Christianity, you think of fellow believers as brothers & sisters in Christ. The Filipina CO really seemed to be softening up toward the end of the interview and actually helping her out a bit).

Pak CO: Here’s the thing, you were calling him brother, so when did you fall in love with him!?

January, 2013.

(Then they both said OK – finally they believed her and maybe they won’t ask that question again!)

Pak CO Why didn’t your fiance come to Pakistan to marry you? Why are you going there?”

He decided that I will go there to get married. But if I can’t get the visa, then he will come to Pakistan and we will get married here.

(This question makes a lot of sense in hindsight because it seems most of the marriage/fiance petitions on VisaJourney from Pakistan are for spousal visas, not so many fiance visas. So I think it’s just very unusual for them to see this kind of case).

Fili CO and Pak CO ask each other if they have any other questions and they both say no. Then they leave the room for about 15 minutes and my fiancee starts crying because she’s certain she’s going to be denied at this point.

Finally the Pakistani CO comes in and he’s like a totally different person now! Instead of being menacing and intimidating he actually tries to help her and cheer her up! He sees her crying and says, “Oh my God, do you need water, do you need tissues!?” He starts running here and there to get her tissues and water!

He said, “Okay we are finished with you”

THE TURNING POINT:

Fili CO then came back into the room and said, “I’m so sorry we were so mean to you. We didn’t want to be but we just had to be sure about your case. We had to be sure you were telling the truth.”

Then Pak CO apologized profusely for being mean too! Then the Filipina CO pulled out our pictures and said, “Wow, your fiance is so handsome!” “He’s tall, I like that!” Fiancee was crying and smiling at the same time. Then Fili CO said, “You’re very pretty and you both look so cute together and you’re so innocent!”

BIG LESSON:

Then the Filipina CO said something, that still floors me. She said, “You know, you can fake a happy relationship in a few pictures, but you cannot do that in so many pictures. You have given us more than a hundred new pictures today and you two are obviously genuinely very happy together – in every single photograph. You can’t fake that.”

The Pak CO says, “Go back to the waiting area, and please, don’t cry. Everything is okay with your case!!”

When she walked into the waiting area all the other people who had been there for visas that day were gone. The only people left were the security people and a few other miscellaneous people who work in the office. When they saw her crying they came over and very nicely tried to comfort her! They told her not to worry – everything is okay! Apparently word of her interview and the results had gotten out to the whole office!

She sat for about 5 minutes in the waiting area and the “pure” American CO who had given her her first interview at Window #6, called her back to the Window. Fiancee still had tears but the woman was SMILING and laughing!!! She said, “Don’t worry everything is okay with your case. YOU’VE BEEN APPROVED!!! Congratulations, and welcome to the United States ma’am!!!!” Then she handed her her things and my fiancee asked, “Where is my passport?” The woman started laughing and with a big smile on her face she said, “You will get your passport by American Express, they will call you within 10 days!!!” And then she said, “Don’t worry, everything is okay. We’ll print the visa on your passport and send it back to you.” Then my fiancee, in her excitement mixed with disbelief, stuck her hand under the window to shake the woman’s hand. I don’t know if that’s allowed or not, but the woman enthusiastically shook her hand and said, “Don’t worry about a thing. Go and smile!!”

The whole time my fiancee never got mad or frustrated with them for asking the same questions over and over again. Her throat was very dry from all the pressure. But she remained polite and dignified throughout the whole thing.

[msbau764 245]

This is the best interview review ever. Those officers should be fired.

[landr 126]

That brought tears to my eyes. Very happy for you both that you were approved after all of that.

Also useful to read all the detail, especially that the COs acknowledged that they were purposefully being mean. Though very sorry that your fiancee was the target of that. Hopefully, their being nice to her afterwards and the approval make up for it somewhat.

Best of luck to you both for the rest of your journey together.

[shahara2013 16]

May God Bless you Both

[Ian H. 207]

I'm very very happy for you guys that you were able to get approved in the end. Our interview had some red flags, but it was nothing like that. I would NOT have been able to comport myself in the way that your fiancee did, I would have reacted very negatively.

The fact that she cried in the end shows that she is only human, but to endure such a horrible interview like that, I can tell she is very strong. This is why I keep repeating that something HAS TO BE DONE about the arbitrary power that these CO's posses. It is UNACCEPTABLE to treat people like this.

Every time I hear stories like these I get this knot in my stomach imagining ourselves going through that, I honestly wouldn't think I could handle it. My cousin's wife passed out in the middle of their interview, I think she suffers from low blood sugar or something, I can't remember. Imagine someone with a heart condition or something going through that.

I'm glad everything worked out for you guys and hopefully you won't EVER have to go through that again. The best of luck to you guys and congratulations!

[khankhanoo7 3]

wow,,, thanks u sooo much for sharing your beauitfull story really i enjoy it alot ,, i readout word to word and i enjoy it alot i swear ,, thanks u soooo much again ,,, such a great detail and such greatfull explation ur story ,,

please tell me CO sponsor your fiancee which one form she bring to islamabad embassy I134 or I-864?

please help me about that

becoz USC fiancee jobless kindly help me i will waiting for ur reply

best of luck my dear

[Boiler 45,665]

OP has a highly unusual case. So not that surprising.

But ended well.

[alicia98981 128]

Good grief. After reading this, I feel like I need to start coaching my fiance. . .

[Cathi 5,771]

This is the best interview review ever. Those officers should be fired.

why should they be fired? They were doing what they are paid to do, weed out fake relationships. I attended my husband;s interview with him and we were both questioned in depth, neither one of us had a problem with it, it;s part of the immigration process and if your relationship is real there is no reason to be nervous. Pakistan is a high fraud country, not only is it a high fraud country, it;s also crawling with terrorists who would do just about anything to get to the US. As a US citizen you should be happy that the consulate is doing it's job. Would you rather have them not question people and hand out visas to people just because they ask? The fact of the matter is this couple has a non traditional relationship that goes against cultural norms in Pakistan, that is why she was questioned so much. The CO's job is to make sure scammers don't worm their way into the country, and I for one, have no problem with that.

[Hypnos 6,576]

Those officers should be fired.

No. They were doing their jobs in a high-fraud consulate.

[Jon York 156]

This is the best interview review ever. Those officers should be fired.

Thanks for your kind words on my review! I hope it will help a few people.

But, I disagree that they should be fired. They actually did a very good job. We're paying them to keep frauds and terrorists out of this country. If they had approved her without this kind of questioning - it would mean they'll approve anybody - no matter how unusual their cases are. The fact that they did what they did shows they take a lot of pride in their work - which is to keep America safe. And I think we should all be very grateful for that. I feel much better knowing that they're really on the lookout for frauds from Pakistan.

And I feel much better knowing that when an unusual case like this comes along they're actually willing to keep an open mind about it and even change their minds during the interview. They could have easily just said DENIED and saved themselves a lot of trouble. But they really put a lot of time and effort into it and they kept an open mind about it - which should make all of us with honest petitions feel great!

That brought tears to my eyes. Very happy for you both that you were approved after all of that.

Also useful to read all the detail, especially that the COs acknowledged that they were purposefully being mean. Though very sorry that your fiancee was the target of that. Hopefully, their being nice to her afterwards and the approval make up for it somewhat.

Best of luck to you both for the rest of your journey together.

Yes, I thought that was fascinating when they apologized to her and acknowledged exactly what they had done and why they had done it! I wanted to share that so if anyone goes through an interview like that in the future - just keep in mind - it doesn't necessarily mean they're going to deny you - but that they're really just trying to get at the truth. And yes, the fact she was approved makes up for ALL of it!!

Good grief. After reading this, I feel like I need to start coaching my fiance. . .

Well Alicia, that's EXACTLY why I took the time to write all this up. Especially when dealing with Muslim countries. It shouldn't be as hard though when the beneficiary is a man, because they have a little more freedom to get out and meet prospective spouses. But definitely do a lot of interview prep! Think of every potential way you all might have broken Moroccan norms and have honest answers to explain them.

why should they be fired? They were doing what they are paid to do, weed out fake relationships. I attended my husband;s interview with him and we were both questioned in depth, neither one of us had a problem with it, it;s part of the immigration process and if your relationship is real there is no reason to be nervous. Pakistan is a high fraud country, not only is it a high fraud country, it;s also crawling with terrorists who would do just about anything to get to the US. As a US citizen you should be happy that the consulate is doing it's job. Would you rather have them not question people and hand out visas to people just because they ask? The fact of the matter is this couple has a non traditional relationship that goes against cultural norms in Pakistan, that is why she was questioned so much. The CO's job is to make sure scammers don't worm their way into the country, and I for one, have no problem with that.

mimolicious - I agree with you COMPLETELY!

Edited November 6, 2014 by Jon York

[Darnell 8,478]

This is the best interview review ever. Those officers should be fired.

First part, agree. Second part, disagree in toto. They were doing their jobs, because of the red flags, and she overcame all.

[Darnell 8,478]

My fiancee just had the harshest interview in Islamabad that I’ve ever read about!

Congratulations, Jon.

Had I known the Christian angle prior, I would have been happy to prep you for this grilling.

Maybe. My life's been weird this year, so maybe not.

Still - Gods Blessings on you two - I'm happy she passed !

[note to others - Christian in Pakistan is a persecuted, minority group and the COs there are not well versed in how to handle things, always attempting to apply the Muslim standard]

[raven52 233]

What a wonderful story to read, I did not want it to end!

Thank God, it ended very well, Please keep us informed as your case progresses, you have probably become "the darlings" of this site!

Good Luck, and a speedy process to its conclusion!

[Jon York 156]

Congratulations, Jon.

Had I known the Christian angle prior, I would have been happy to prep you for this grilling.

Maybe. My life's been weird this year, so maybe not.

Still - Gods Blessings on you two - I'm happy she passed !

[note to others - Christian in Pakistan is a persecuted, minority group and the COs there are not well versed in how to handle things, always attempting to apply the Muslim standard]

Darnell, I wish I had known to ask you! And you're totally right - they were attempting to force the Muslim standards on her. But even Christians in Pakistan for the most part go with the arranged marriage customs. So... it was unusual either way. She's blessed to have parents who normally follow the marriage customs but are willing to be a little more Western in their outlook as well. Their other children had traditional marriages, but they were very open to doing things differently in this case!