Abused, Pregnant Friend Has Questions [split topic]

[Shaz1 65]

A female friend of mine who applied for her fiancé a K1 visa. After his arrival and getting married to him, she applied for his work permit and AOS. He has been abusive toward her, now she is pregnant as well. He has threaten her that she will face consequences for disobeying him. She is afraid that he will leave her once he get his green card and US citizenship. Even though he is doing all this she does not want him to go back or leave her. 
she is asking what can she do to hold his green card? But not stop him from getting work permit. 

[TBoneTX 43,176]

The above was split from an unrelated thread in another forum.

[nastra30 2,001]

15 hours ago, Shaz1 said:

A female friend of mine who applied for her fiancé a K1 visa. After his arrival and getting married to him, she applied for his work permit and AOS. He has been abusive toward her, now she is pregnant as well. He has threaten her that she will face consequences for disobeying him. She is afraid that he will leave her once he get his green card and US citizenship. Even though he is doing all this she does not want him to go back or leave her. 
she is asking what can she do to hold his green card? But not stop him from getting work permit. 

So she wants abusive husband not to leave her? And not go back to his home country?

 

Also, I'm not sure how she wants him to stay in the country if he doesn't have a greencard card.

 

In any case, if she wants to stop him from getting his greencard, she should write USCIS and request to pull her petition and affidavit of support.

Edited September 25, 2022 by nastra30

[Adventine 3,187]

I'm guessing it's a combination of an abused mindset (still clinging to her abuser) and family/cultural pressure to stay together even if the marriage isn't working out. 

 

There's really no way to obtain JUST work permit and at the same time prevent the green card from just arriving.

 

My personal recommendation would be to kick out this sorry excuse for a husband, divorce him and withdraw the affidavit of support.

[Family 3,519]

23 hours ago, Shaz1 said:

He has threaten her that she will face consequences for disobeying him. She is afraid that he will leave her once he get his green card and US citizenship

She can send in a Letter To Withdraw I-864 Support and effectively “ cancel” his application/ green card but this will cancel his pending work permit application as well. 
Offer your friend a safe place to stay for a while and encourage her to get on VJ , maybe it will help her figure out what steps she can take. 

 

Your friend also  needs to realize that if husband has laid hands on her , he will likely make good on those “threats and consequences. .” As another noted , a great deal of family/ cultural dynamics of what her husband’s expectations of “obedience “ are . 
 

 

Lightly beating’ wife permissible

In 2016, the Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) advocated allowing a husband to ‘lightly' beat his wife if he feels it is necessary, as well as requiring women to breastfeed their children for two years.

In the same year, the constitutional council ruled that the Punjab Assembly and the Khyber Pakhtunkhwa (KP) government's women's protection bills, which criminalised all types of violence against women, were "un-Islamic."

[Eric-Pris 1,602]

23 hours ago, Family said:

Lightly beating’ wife permissible

In 2016, the Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) advocated allowing a husband to ‘lightly' beat his wife if he feels it is necessary, as well as requiring women to breastfeed their children for two years.

In the same year, the constitutional council ruled that the Punjab Assembly and the Khyber Pakhtunkhwa (KP) government's women's protection bills, which criminalised all types of violence against women, were "un-Islamic."

Be careful, you may labeled as a Islamophobe, even though everything you said is completely factual.

 

[powerpuff 5,917]

26 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

Be careful, you may labeled as a Islamophobe, even though everything you said is completely factual.

 

Unfortunately, certain humans choose to interpret Islam in their sick ways, much like other religions (Christianity and KKK/eugenics comes to mind). I’m a practicing Muslim and find this appalling but unsurprising as have seen countless times as Islam gets twisted to fit their violent narratives.

 

Fortunately though, this CII’s “rulings” are non-binding. 

 

 

[Family 3,519]

2 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

23 hours ago, Family said:

Lightly beating’ wife permissible

In 2016, the Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) advocated allowing a husband to ‘lightly' beat his wife if he feels it is necessary, as well as requiring women to breastfeed their children for two years.

In the same year, the constitutional council ruled that the Punjab Assembly and the Khyber Pakhtunkhwa (KP) government's women's protection bills, which criminalised all types of violence against women, were "un-Islamic."

Be careful, you may labeled as a Islamophobe, even though everything you said is completely factual.

Thank you @Eric-Pris ..Good Point, I should include other cultures…that struggle with changing what has been acceptable historically . 

OP’ s friend just happens to be pregnant , in love ….and perhaps accepting some “ threats” as “ normal” 

 

Ireland criminalizes emotional abuse with new domestic violence law

Psychological and emotional abuse in intimate relationships is now a crime in Ireland. 

The Domestic Violence Act 2018 went into effect on Tuesday and provides new protections for victims of “coercive control,” a type of emotional and psychological abuse aimed at stripping a person of their self-worth and agency.

https://www.cnn.com/2019/01/02/health/ireland-coercive-control-domestic-abuse-intl