CR1 visa- Now Ongoing Divorce Case - Husband not cooperating/ Illegally held personal belongings

[tcy 29]

2 minutes ago, laylalex said:

She was already permitted to do drop service at his house, so she doesn't need to worry about service. Her husband passed the time he had to respond, so she can now get the divorce entered by default, if I am reading correctly what she wrote. I agree her lawyer (if she has one?) needs to get moving on the default now that the time is passed for him to file something.

 

OP, your best revenge is moving on and living your very best life. I wanted to punish my ex so badly when he left me and basically took everything out of our joint bank account, cut off my access to our credit cards (I was only ever an authorized user), etc. I had a rough time in the months that followed until I got organized and took control. I kept on top of the divorce and asked a lot of questions. My lawyer was very sympathetic and fought hard for me. It was good to have someone hold my hand while I got my footing again because I was heartbroken and my whole world had been turned upside down. If you can afford a lawyer, get one. If not, there are often self help clinics at the courts to guide you. Rely on your friends and family, don't be ashamed of what has happened. 

 

Best of luck. You are going to come out of this stronger and happier in the end. Losing possessions can feel hard but in the end, they're only things, even if they seem dear to you. Sometimes it's better to let them go if you must in order to take care of yourself. 

I'm so sorry to hear about you. But you're right!! I have to fight and get out of this and move on with life

[laylalex 7,261]

1 minute ago, tcy said:

I'm so sorry to hear about you. But you're right!! I have to fight and get out of this and move on with life

You've got this!  I am here 4 years later, married to a wonderful guy and extremely happy. My ex is still miserable.  

 

You sound like you are a fighter with the way that you've taken control of serving the papers. Keep it up! ❤️ 

[USC4SPOUSE 506]

I just want to say that is just terrible, and I am sorry you are going through this. Focus on your future and learn from the past as you let go of it. Things are things. You came out of this in one piece even though it may not feel that way right now.

 

all the best to you,

 

USC4SPOUSE

[JeanneAdil 6,252]

3 hours ago, tcy said:

Yes initially we tried serving through police constable. He opened the door and misbehaved without giving away his identity and closed door on the lady constable. But the lady identified that as my spouse looking at his driving license. Then we decided to go with substitute service and went with private processor. 5 more attempts were made. In those 5 attempts he/some male from his fam opened door and were not ready to take papers or reveal where my spouse was. On other occasions the processor noted that there were shadows inside house who'd purposely not open door and wait till he left. 

 

After all this chaos, we again got another motion for substitute service where court asked processor to leave papers at his door because he was intentionally avoiding taking them..

this is what califonia says

so,  get your lawyer to do his job

the use the divorce and waiver to take care of immigration

• • If the party being served does not want to take the papers, they can be left on the ground in front of him or her.  If he or she takes the papers and tears them up or throws them away, service is still considered to be valid. The person being served does not have to sign anything.

   

• The server then fills out a proof of service, detailing when, where, and how (in person) the papers were served. The server signs the proof of service and returns it to you to file in court.

https://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-serving.htm?rdeLocaleAttr=en

[tcy 29]

56 minutes ago, USC4SPOUSE said:

I just want to say that is just terrible, and I am sorry you are going through this. Focus on your future and learn from the past as you let go of it. Things are things. You came out of this in one piece even though it may not feel that way right now.

 

all the best to you,

 

USC4SPOUSE

Thank you!! 

[Diane and Chris 651]

1 hour ago, JeanneAdil said:

this is what califonia says

so,  get your lawyer to do his job

the use the divorce and waiver to take care of immigration

• • If the party being served does not want to take the papers, they can be left on the ground in front of him or her.  If he or she takes the papers and tears them up or throws them away, service is still considered to be valid. The person being served does not have to sign anything.

   

• The server then fills out a proof of service, detailing when, where, and how (in person) the papers were served. The server signs the proof of service and returns it to you to file in court.

https://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-serving.htm?rdeLocaleAttr=en

I believe OP lived in Texas and is now in NY. 

[tcy 29]

12 minutes ago, Diane and Chris said:

I believe OP lived in Texas and is now in NY. 

Hi, yes im currently living in NY but I filed for divorce in dallas texas and my lawyer is based in dallas.

[tcy 29]

I sincerely want to thank everyone from the bottom of my heart who took out time to send me good wishes and their precious advices!! It all means a lot!! I will not give up and I will fight through it and come out stronger. 

[TBoneTX 43,422]

Good luck and continued strength to you.

[Nitas_man 3,100]

6 hours ago, JeanneAdil said:

this is what califonia says

so,  get your lawyer to do his job

the use the divorce and waiver to take care of immigration

• • If the party being served does not want to take the papers, they can be left on the ground in front of him or her.  If he or she takes the papers and tears them up or throws them away, service is still considered to be valid. The person being served does not have to sign anything.

   

• The server then fills out a proof of service, detailing when, where, and how (in person) the papers were served. The server signs the proof of service and returns it to you to file in court.

https://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-serving.htm?rdeLocaleAttr=en

States have different rules of service

[Timona 3,970]

OP, other have addressed your divorce issues. I will ask on your GC.

 

Since you got it in 2019, have you filed to remove conditions? What is the residence since date written on your GC? 

You are technically still married, so you will have to file as such and then as soon as you get the divorce certificate, send that in and request USCIS to switch to divorce waiver option.

 

I understand it is taking long in your divorce due to his whack-a-mole behavior. However, 4 months is a lot. Divorce in Texas is 60 days, I believe, which is 2 months. You should have got your divorce long ago. Push your lawyer or do it yourself. 

Lastly, unless your belongings are $5000+, for the sake of your sanity, just let him keep it. They can be replaced. 

[tcy 29]

19 minutes ago, Timona said:

OP, other have addressed your divorce issues. I will ask on your GC.

 

Since you got it in 2019, have you filed to remove conditions? What is the residence since date written on your GC? 

You are technically still married, so you will have to file as such and then as soon as you get the divorce certificate, send that in and request USCIS to switch to divorce waiver option.

 

I understand it is taking long in your divorce due to his whack-a-mole behavior. However, 4 months is a lot. Divorce in Texas is 60 days, I believe, which is 2 months. You should have got your divorce long ago. Push your lawyer or do it yourself. 

Lastly, unless your belongings are $5000+, for the sake of your sanity, just let him keep it. They can be replaced. 

Hi, 

 

Just to clarify to everyone I was lucky when I got my CR1 visa it was already past 2.5 years of our marriage so I got 10 years GC upon entry so I don't have to worry about 2 years conditional residence removal procedure. 

 

However, I didn't know much when I was in dallas with my ex spouse. He took full advantage of my lack of knowledge and tried to intimidate me saying "it doesn't matter if I have 10 yrs visa because moment we are divorced he'd inform USCIS and get me deported on the basis of fraud and nonsense". I was scared for a while and only gained confidence after speaking to several immigration lawyers that it won't be so easy for him to get me deported now that I have a 10 permanent GC.

 

He'd even try to say he'll get annulment as this was fraud marriage. It's so shameful to think that this guy who's a physician by profession, so called well behaved, polite person could turn out to be monster. He was trying to pressurize me in every possible way to stay away from divorcing. Reasons only best known to him and his parents

 

Yes absolutely I'm pushing my lawyer to file motion for default judgment asap so that I can get divorce granted. 

Edited May 20, 2021 by tcy

[Pinkrlion 2,611]

Sometimes it is better to just leave your stuff and move on

[JeanneAdil 6,252]

14 hours ago, Diane and Chris said:

I believe OP lived in Texas and is now in NY. 

ok but she needs to follow thru with attorney as if he serves her (as she lives in NY state and that is how he would have to do it according to rules of the county she is in)  she will be waiting from date of legal separation (not just leaving him but legal court document) to have the divorce final.   NY makes people wait a year 

[mushroomspore 3,043]

1 hour ago, tcy said:

Hi, 

 

Just to clarify to everyone I was lucky when I got my CR1 visa it was already past 2.5 years of our marriage so I got 10 years GC upon entry so I don't have to worry about 2 years conditional residence removal procedure. 

 

However, I didn't know much when I was in dallas with my ex spouse. He took full advantage of my lack of knowledge and tried to intimidate me saying "it doesn't matter if I have 10 yrs visa because moment we are divorced he'd inform USCIS and get me deported on the basis of fraud and nonsense". I was scared for a while and only gained confidence after speaking to several immigration lawyers that it won't be so easy for him to get me deported now that I have a 10 permanent GC.

 

He'd even try to say he'll get annulment as this was fraud marriage. It's so shameful to think that this guy who's a physician by profession, so called well behaved, polite person could turn out to be monster. He was trying to pressurize me in every possible way to stay away from divorcing. Reasons only best known to him and his parents

 

Yes absolutely I'm pushing my lawyer to file motion for default judgment asap so that I can get divorce granted. 

All the more reason to document his behavior in every way possible and give it all to your lawyer. Take screenshots of his messages to you, things like that. He'll see he won't be able to fool a judge into thinking he's "polite" when the judge sees your evidence of your ex's abuse.