Victims of US citizens

[Crazy Cat 39,237]

1 minute ago, Aagha said:

There definitely are. But this topic is not about that. This is about US citizens who marry to exploit foreigners in all ways possible, while being controlling and not compromising about anything. Treating foreigners like imported personal servants.

 

We are telling you that It happens from both sides......

Edited October 12, 2020 by Lucky Cat

[Crazy Cat 39,237]

1 minute ago, Aagha said:

There definitely are. But this topic is not about that. This is about US citizens who marry to exploit foreigners in all ways possible, while being controlling and not compromising about anything. Treating foreigners like imported personal servants.

 

You made the claim that "Laws always mention foreigner using the USC!!! ".  That just isn't true.

[Aagha 3]

1 minute ago, Lucky Cat said:

You made the claim that "Laws always mention foreigner using the USC!!! ".  That just isn't true.

Thank you. I posted this to hear experiences.

[JFH 12,189]

Of course it works both ways. In fact it’s easier for USCs to defraud and manipulate the foreign spouse as the foreign spouse has far more to lose and is often in a more vulnerable position. Fiancés in particular are very much at risk of this situation happening to them as they are pretty much dependent on the USC for everything until they have AP/EAD or their GC. Most don’t have a support network of other family members here. Their very existence in this country is dependent upon the USC filing the AOS paperwork for them. No matter how abusive or cruel a foreign spouse acts, the USC is never at risk of being deported. 

[Boiler 43,435]

K1 has so much going against it, OK makes sense in some very rare situations, should he a health warning.

[mushroomspore 3,043]

36 minutes ago, Aagha said:

There definitely are. But this topic is not about that. This is about US citizens who marry to exploit foreigners in all ways possible, while being controlling and not compromising about anything. Treating foreigners like imported personal servants. WAVA is great but not that useful when the foreigner is unemployed and not having a lot helpful contacts- thanks to USC who tries to keep them "home" and not letting them go out and controlling who will they talk to or socialize with. Especially when one is depending on housing that belongs to USC. 

 

Ok but you specifically tried to point that the laws "always talk about immigrants defrauding US citizens" and that's simply not true. There are definitely stories of abusive US citizens who trap and exploit their immigrant spouses. I don't have full statistics though so I can't say for sure which scenario is more common. But if I had to guess, I'd say that abusive US citizens are probably the more common one. And you probably won't hear/see too many posts about it. It's not like abusers are gonna come onto a forum that's actively and regularly monitored by the feds to brag about their evil deeds. And since victims tend to be too scared to speak out in any way (even online), it's rare to see them post about their experiences. It does happen though; I think I've only seen a handful over the past 3-4 years that I've been on here.

Edited October 12, 2020 by mushroomspore

[Ortolan 381]

21 minutes ago, Boiler said:

K1 has so much going against it, OK makes sense in some very rare situations, should he a health warning.

I agree, K1 seems like a kind of more risky endeavor, as the foreign fiance/ee has to pull up stakes in their own country and pretty much cross their fingers, pack up their life completely, and move here.

I'd sure think about it long and hard before I did the same.

[Crazy Cat 39,237]

33 minutes ago, Ortolan said:

I agree, K1 seems like a kind of more risky endeavor, as the foreign fiance/ee has to pull up stakes in their own country and pretty much cross their fingers, pack up their life completely, and move here.

I'd sure think about it long and hard before I did the same.

That is sometimes the case for spouses, too such as a marriage after a short engagement......but one big risk for a K-1 holder is due to the fact that a K-1 must marry and adjust status through the original petitioner (with few exceptions) after arriving in the US.  Thus, if a USC decides against marriage or decides not to participate in the adjustment of status, the K-1 immigrant has no legal options (except under certain circumstances) to remain in the US.  On the other hand, a CR-1 immigrant is a legal Green Card holder the moment he/she enters the US.

Edited October 12, 2020 by Lucky Cat

[Lucky2Lucky 2,526]

1 hour ago, Aagha said:

I just find it unbelievable that the laws and stereotypes always favor the USC spouse. Laws always mention foreigner using the USC!!!  If the foreigner marries in good intent and faith and promises to dedicate themselves to improve the US citizen's life - including listening to everything they say and want, and then the US citizen shows they have no intent of respecting or committing to the foreign spouse and making it look like a joke of a marriage, that is putting the foreigner at all sorts of risks where they also have little options, especially if they depend on USC. Not to mention how vulnerable foreigners are and often get in hands of someone who thinks they're entitled to do whatever and nothing can happen to them (I'm an American and I can do whatever I want and you are here to "obey") while generally being manipulative and exploitative, emotionally and verbally abusive.

I hear what you are saying but there are laws to protect the immigrants against abuse such as VAWA and if the petitioner has a crime that falls under the Adam Walsh Act. I believe some embassies require applicants to go to a seminar the discusses signs of abuse as well as give a pamphlet (not 100% sure on this though) These protect the immigrant. I can't think of any law that specifically "mentions" the foreigner using the USC. If the immigrant marries in good faith and they are emotionally and/or verbally abused they can file under VAWA. If a marriage breaks down and there is no abuse- well that can happen in any marriage regardless of nationality. It is just the likelihood of a marriage breaking down that was entered in good faith on both parties (because both parties have to agree they enter in good faith) within 90 days (when adjustment of status should be completed) is so rare that there is almost always a chance the immigrant has legal rights to stay in the country. 

[Orangesapples 1,954]

1 hour ago, Luckycuds said:

 I believe some embassies require applicants to go to a seminar the discusses signs of abuse as well as give a pamphlet (not 100% sure on this though) 

I think they always give the immigrant a pamphlet about their rights when married to a USC (informing them about divorce laws, also that they don't have to stay married in order to keep their status, that a divorce can happen unilaterally, etc.), as well as resources for help if domestic violence happens. The pamphlet is in the local language, not in English. At least I received such a pamphlet with my visa and no seminars were required. 

[Rowe26 0]

My spouse is a very nice person when I first met her in Asia. I was working as a Behavior Therapist in Singapore and I had a great career back then. When K1 visa was approved and I get to stay with her for a few months and after getting married, she was a totally  different person. She is a malignant narcissist and I experienced everything with her (i.e.gaslighting, manipulation, mind games, control freak, mental abuse, physical abuse etc.). After she kicked me out of her house and stayed with her son and daughter in law for 1 night  I tried to work things out with her because I love her and i want to stay legally here.. But then it gets worse as she played games with me. She emotionally tortured me by saying you only need green card and you don't really love me, you lied to everybody that i kicked you out of the house. I became the liar and she became the victim. As I learned about more on narcissist, I realized that I am  very lucky getting out of that situation. It might have been worse as she is a cop and guns are all over her room. I filed a Vawa case and waiting for my EAD to be able to work and support myself here.

[Nitas_man 3,100]

On 10/11/2020 at 12:19 PM, Aagha said:

Hi everyone. I always see examples of US citizens being defrauded by foreign nationals. I was wondering if there are stories that include the opposite? Example would be a US citizen who has exploitative intentions towards a foreign spouse who is in love with them and didn't see the "red flags" in the relationship itself, and that developed further throughout the marriage. "If you don't prove your love by doing this-because that makes me happy, I will think you're just using me for a green card."

 

Thanks.

Whole section here on that.  VAWA threads are full of those stories.  Lot of them make you just SMH.  

Edited October 12, 2020 by Nitas_man

[JFH 12,189]

2 hours ago, Luckycuds said:

I hear what you are saying but there are laws to protect the immigrants against abuse such as VAWA and if the petitioner has a crime that falls under the Adam Walsh Act. I believe some embassies require applicants to go to a seminar the discusses signs of abuse as well as give a pamphlet (not 100% sure on this though) These protect the immigrant. I can't think of any law that specifically "mentions" the foreigner using the USC. If the immigrant marries in good faith and they are emotionally and/or verbally abused they can file under VAWA. If a marriage breaks down and there is no abuse- well that can happen in any marriage regardless of nationality. It is just the likelihood of a marriage breaking down that was entered in good faith on both parties (because both parties have to agree they enter in good faith) within 90 days (when adjustment of status should be completed) is so rare that there is almost always a chance the immigrant has legal rights to stay in the country. 

Everyone in this country is protected against abuse by the laws of the land. Abuse is a crime everywhere in this country. It doesn’t matter whether the victim is an immigrant or not, whether the abuser is an immigrant or not. Our laws here have zero tolerance for all forms of abuse.

[Lucky2Lucky 2,526]

53 minutes ago, JFH said:

Everyone in this country is protected against abuse by the laws of the land. Abuse is a crime everywhere in this country. It doesn’t matter whether the victim is an immigrant or not, whether the abuser is an immigrant or not. Our laws here have zero tolerance for all forms of abuse.

Yes, I realize that. It seems OP felt immigrants are left out of these protections when in fact they are not.

[Villanelle 4,121]

5 hours ago, Aagha said:

  putting the foreigner at all sorts of risks where they also have little options, especially if they depend on USC.

 

 

5 hours ago, Aagha said:

 

while generally being manipulative and exploitative, emotionally and verbally abusive.

There is an option- VAWA. Not sure why you keep saying this topic isnt about VAWA when it clearly is? If your USC or LPR spouse is abusive VAWA can help you obtain status w/o their help. Currently we are on Part 20 of the VAWA thread. When the thread reaches 200-300 pages they create a new 'part' due to its size. So there is apx 4000+ pages of VAWA discussion on VJ.  Isnt that more then enough of examples of stories of victims?