Unaware of what is really going on????

[Helen Louise Pile 80]

It seems like this man has taken advantage of you and your caring and trusting nature in order to secure himself legal status in the US.

This does not seem to be a pleasant, healthy or particularly safe place for you to allow your child to be.

I hope someone can give you advice on what to do to report him for this.

Best wishes.

Edited June 15, 2011 by Helen Louise Pile

[belinda63 2,981]

Sounds like he is marrying for a green card and he probably married the prior woman for the same reason as well. Does grandma still have your room available? This is not the man for you, he is just using you. Best thing for you and your son is to move back with grandma or any other available location and file for divorce. Your feelings for him are obviously not being returned and there is no reason for you to remain in an abusive relationship.

Move on to greener pastures. Good Luck.

[Adil & Jeanne 296]

Is he in US and for how long. He has to apply for his own citizenship after he is here 5 years. You can not do it.

and if he is this secretive now, I would seriously consider an investigation of him. Not that expensive and you should see into his computer. Think of all this carefully. No one can live with abuse. It never gets better. It can only escalate. Try talking serious to him. Find out if he has fears of his own. Then make him and i mean make him listen to yours concerns. If he doesn't talk open and freely, get rid of this jerk.

Leave if you have to and if he is here under 5 years, inform immigration.

I am a US citizen who is petioning for my husbands citizenship, we got married in October 2010. We have our interview on June 30..I am really starting to grow more concerned as to why I have not seen any documents he has recieved from USCIS, only the ones I filled out when we first got married..I dont even have any clue what our case number is. We have lived together since marriage..but he also has a room he uses for his office, that he keeps mostly locked. We have had lots of problems, because i feel he has been very elusive and secretive..not to mention verbally and emotionally abusive towards me..the apartment we live in is his..but he promised to use the spare room as a room for my son..but then put lock on door after we married. I am getting really concerned here, and do not want to continue anything that will put me at risk for commiting any type of marriage fraud..because i entered this marriage thinking he loved me not as a sham.

[Ironman140 45]

Sorry that your being treated this way. But your first priority is your child. Growing up around this type of man is not good for the child or you. This man Is only using you for a GC. Don't walk run back to grandmas and seek help from

A local shelter.. Good luck

Life is good and will get better for you

[Krikit 1,163]

He was given voluntary departure and has not complied. Was there a Stay of Removal filed? Here is an informative link:

http://www.massachusettsimmigrationlawyerblog.com/2009/06/why-i-dont-recommend-voluntary.html

[TeddyHoney 42]

Wow! I know love can be blind, but WOW! I mean, there were some serious red flags there starting with the first trip to the first lawyer. I'm really sorry about your situation, but I have to say I feel you could've avoided it.

Maybe that marriage can be annulled since its been less than a year and or maybe you can just walk away from this mess and divorce before it gets worse for you both physically and legally!!!

God bless you and I will pray for you and your son.

[Manda_Uk 2]

Oh my goodness that sounds terrible i'm so sorry this is happening to you! I'm also sorry to say this definitely sounds like he married you for a green card, making you go and see a lawyer without telling you what is was about?! It makes me so sick the lengths that some people go to. Is there anyway you can seek some legal advice? Best of luck to you!!

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

You've been scammed. Leave now. Go back to your grandmothers house. File for a divorce. Have no further contact with him. If he can't get a green by marriage then he'll try to get one through VAWA, which means claiming you abused him. Don't give him an opportunity to manufacture any evidence of this sort, like calling the cops on you.

DO NOT GO TO THE GREEN CARD INTERVIEW!!! I can virtually guarantee you would be subjected to a grueling Stokes interview, given his serious history with immigration. You DON'T want to go through this.

I can recall only one or two cases where the evidence of fraud was more clear than this one.

[Golden Gate 530]

I am so sorry this is happening to you. Please, just take care of yourself and your son. Do as people advised and go to your grandmother, divorce him and don't interact with him anymore. Nothing good will come of this relationship.

Best wishes to you! You will be ok, once you are out of this situation.

[Shenzhen 34]

1st sorry to hear this. Listen to what everyone is saying and do what your gut is telling you. Get out as quickly as possible. You are not in any kind of loving marriage. Wow, you were scammed, maybe you were hoping beyond hope? Good luck too!

Edited June 15, 2011 by Shenzhen

[Casprd 167]

Wow. Ok it is obvious he married you to avoid a Deportation order. It is my understanding that marriage to a USC isn't going to stop that so his AOS will most likely be denied and a very good possiblity he is going to be facing a long term ban. Also pretty obvious that he is hiding some things from you which could be illegal activities but IMO are most likely related to another woman whether here or back in his home country.

My advice is not to walk but to run away from this situation. I don't buy the whole "too embarrassed" line. He started the whole relationship hiding things from you and it has continued this way up to the present day. This guy is going to do anything and everything to try to stay here and you will get dragged down with him. You need to think about you and your child now and get away from him. Seek out a divorce attorney or talk to someone at the local women's shelter where they can refer you to attorneys. This is a bad bad situation and you don't want to get caught up in any immigration fraud.

[Lynn n Sam 57]

I don't even want to say what I'm thinking .... and NO ONE can know exactly what's going on unless you're a mind reader or he verbally expressed it, but this marriage sounds fraudulent to me - at least on his end, not yours. Sorry, I'm sure this is not helping and it's just my opinion. I'd get out quickly!

[Harsh_77 716]

You've been scammed. Leave now. Go back to your grandmothers house. File for a divorce. Have no further contact with him. If he can't get a green by marriage then he'll try to get one through VAWA, which means claiming you abused him. Don't give him an opportunity to manufacture any evidence of this sort, like calling the cops on you.

DO NOT GO TO THE GREEN CARD INTERVIEW!!! I can virtually guarantee you would be subjected to a grueling Stokes interview, given his serious history with immigration. You DON'T want to go through this.

I can recall only one or two cases where the evidence of fraud was more clear than this one.

There is no interview either..... looks like she is lost and they have never filed the complete paperwork for him.

From what I have read he is still illegal and he has only managed to stay in the country based on this marriage.

I would agree with Jim, get yourself out of this mess and then let him fight his battle with immigration.

Report him to sham as immigration so if he tries to pull this on another woman, immigration has it on their records.

[Richard-Y-Abigail 18]

Unfortunately, often in life, we give our heart to someone, but if love is not reciprocated, there is no relationship. I can tell from your letter that you have dad doubts all along, and that you did not listen to your intuition, or inner voice, that what this man was doing was wrong. When we listen to our hearts, we sometimes get hurt. You just did not listen to your head. As Casprd said, do not continue with this marriage, or the adjustment process. If you profess love for this man at the AOS interview, you will look guilty. You will need to answer questions about your marriage, and I am sure that the AOS interviewer has had plenty of experience dealing with people like your husband. By association, you will be guilty also.

Please be careful. If I were you, I would, also, contact a women's abuse organization and protect yourself legally. They will have legal help, and you will have a record of what is happening so that if your husband calls the police on you, he will not be able to use this to get his residency permit.

I am sorry that this is happening to you, but you will have to leave your heart out of this.

[Brit Abroad 166]

You've been scammed. Leave now. Go back to your grandmothers house. File for a divorce. Have no further contact with him. If he can't get a green by marriage then he'll try to get one through VAWA, which means claiming you abused him. Don't give him an opportunity to manufacture any evidence of this sort, like calling the cops on you.

DO NOT GO TO THE GREEN CARD INTERVIEW!!! I can virtually guarantee you would be subjected to a grueling Stokes interview, given his serious history with immigration. You DON'T want to go through this.

I can recall only one or two cases where the evidence of fraud was more clear than this one.

Best advice I've seen. Only thing I would add is to visit your local USCIS and explain the situation to date, once you are no longer at his address. Then the problem becomes theirs to deal with, not yours. Stay safe, take care of yourself and your child.

Locked doors never mean anything good, regardless of what is happening behind them. In a healthy relationship it's a lack of trust but yours is most definitely not a healthy relationship, and you need to take steps to remove yourself from it.

Best of luck to you.