No Family Left

[No Family Left 0]

I came to the US, for a German Company I worked for since 1992, in 2016 on a E-1 visa. All was fine in my life. I had a partner and we were together for 12 years and still in love like on the first day, I had my parents which I love so much. I had a life that could not be better. I worked hard but therefore could fullfill many of my dreams and because of my company I could travel to 32 countries around the world, some for business, some for pleasure. Always with my partner and sometimes parents joined us, especially when we were doing cruises twice a year. 
Then, in May 2020, while countries around the world banned eachother from travelling, my partner died because of cancer. And I couldn’t be there when I was needed most. I will never forgive this to myself. Then, in November 2020, my father died because of Corona. And I could not be there when I was needed most. I will never forgive this to myself. Then, a few days later, my mother died because of Corona. And I could not be there when I was needed most. I will never forgive this to myself. The next day, a Monday morning, I went to office, took a sheet of paper, wrote „ I Quit “ onto it and left. I wrote these words because I could not speak anymore. Not one word. Now I should have to leave the US, but I wasn’t possible. I knew nobody would be there anymore. I stayed in my nice apartment with lake view and just sat there. I wanted to end my life. But 2 times the police was faster. So I sat there, day in and out and used all my savings to pay rent and for the car and so on. Until the money was gone. Then I lost the apartment and short time later the car was repoed. Now I was without partner, parents, money, car. And became homeless. Friends then took me to their house. They did their very best to help me. I will forever be thankful. Then the day arrived where my I-94 expired, that was in February 2022. But I still had fear to return to Germany. I still could not speak a word. I could not imagine that when I saw them the last time they were alive. And now nobody would be there at the airport to pick me up. Because they were no longer there. I bought since then 5 tickets full fare to fly back to Germany. And every time at the day or departure .. I could not make it to the airport and was a no show. How I could pay for the ticket? I illegally started driving for a Rideshare company to safe money . So every time I saved enough I bought a ticket. And let it go with no money back. Now it’s 2023, May. I finally wish to visit their graves. I want to be there as much as I can. Every day. As many hours I can. I know I will get banned from entering the US ever again or at least 10 years. I would not care but getting banned makes me feel that I now also loose my friends here that helped me so much. This feeling contributed to leave the US, first I couldn’t, then I tried but knew I could not return . I don’t want or need a visa ( I will never get one again is the better wording) but I would like to use ESTA from time to time to visit the friends. I would like to have just the opportunity to visit them again, and not taken away the possibility. My heart can not cope with all of this . I want to go to the office of CBP or whoever is responsible at report myself. Maybe get a chance to explain everything. Will there be a chance left to not get banned from ESTA? I’m sorry for writing so much and bother you with the problems in my life. 

[powerpuff 5,884]

~~ Topic moved from Off Topic to Tourist visa forum as ESTA related questions are also discussed here ~~
 

My condolences about your loved ones. That sounds awful and mentally exhausting 

 

You did accrue more than a year of unlawful presence which carries a mandatory 10 year ban from entering the US. ESTA privileges are also gone, if not forever, definitely for the 10 years of the ban, possibly and mostly likely beyond that, too. 

1 hour ago, No Family Left said:

I want to go to the office of CBP or whoever is responsible at report myself. Maybe get a chance to explain everything

I advise you to not do that, that is a very bad idea.

Edited May 30, 2023 by powerpuff

[Family 3,463]

Wow…you joined VJ one hour ago ( 60 minutes) and last logged in 55 minutes ago…you are lighting speed as far as getting profile up and ready and writing such a touching long story of your journey. ..all in 5 FIVE minutes …

Anyway , go home , apply for B-2 and present your story. 
 

 

[Boiler 43,397]

VWP I think you mean, but getting ESTA with your history is somewhat unlikely.

 

The people you would explain this to is the Consulate in Germany when you apply for a B.

[TBoneTX 43,020]

1 hour ago, Family said:

all in 5 FIVE minutes

Let's avoid judging.  The OP might have composed the message elsewhere and copied/pasted it here.

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No Family Left, sincere sympathies.  Rely on friends and friendly acquaintances for support.  Don't go to CBP.  Leave the U.S., recover, and in a few years approach the consulate in Germany for a tourist visa.

[Lemonslice 4,549]

I am sorry, this is a hard situation.  Not about the future trip to the USA, but about your trip back to Germany - I want to say that the Consulate General (or the Embassy, depending on where you live), can usually assist you when you are in a difficult situation, and are willing, but unable to go back.  Should you need their assistance, please reach out.  

https://www.germany.info/us-en

 

Wishing you peace, and better moments, in the near future.  Take care. 

[SalishSea 16,746]

50 minutes ago, Lemonslice said:

I am sorry, this is a hard situation.  Not about the future trip to the USA, but about your trip back to Germany - I want to say that the Consulate General (or the Embassy, depending on where you live), can usually assist you when you are in a difficult situation, and are willing, but unable to go back.  Should you need their assistance, please reach out.  

https://www.germany.info/us-en

 

Wishing you peace, and better moments, in the near future.  Take care. 

Great advice.  A major mission of embassies abroad is to help citizens to repatriate when needed.   Many will even loan you money for a ticket, and I would think Germany would be one of those, with a strong social welfare program.

[Loren Y 2,731]

Next time buy a refundable ticket is my advice. Airlines love no shows, that's free money.