widow of us citizen Widow visa interview day. (Fake smile?!yes?!No?!)

[Ajk3visa 12]

15 minutes ago, databit said:

Just don't act mentally ill.

Thanks good advice. Im just to stressed thats all. 

[dwheels76 5,463]

1 hour ago, Ajk3visa said:

Aww. Even if im faking my smile for them lol?! Well i hope i will be in a good mood and stress free that day so my smile comes naturally. 

So sorry to read about your situation and death of your husband and conditions for you and your daughter.

Just be you. If you cry you cry. If you have panic attack ask for a minute to calm down and regroup. There's no standard "way to act". You are a window in a crisis situation why the heck would you be required to smile. Just be you whatever you it is feeling that day. You are overthinking this.

 

 

[mniceguy16 184]

1 hour ago, Ajk3visa said:

Aww. Even if im faking my smile for them lol?! Well i hope i will be in a good mood and stress free that day so my smile comes naturally. 

I don't remember smiling during my interview because my IO was frowning throughout giving me the impression that I was being intimidated, I just kept a straight face, answered all questions asked while keeping the "eyeball to eyeball" contact and even when he was done I was standing there waiting for a reply from him on the status of the interview, he just kept typing and it felt like an eternity. He got up, left without saying anything and I still stood there. He noticed I was standing there, came back and said "you are free to go". Btw I was handed the form on how to pay the gc fees even before he took my supporting documents and began asking me questions like I said earlier, 90% of the decisions are taken even before the interview begins officially. Just be calm, dress normally and decently, there is no dress code, wear a clean dress, nothing seductive or provocative and you will be fine.

Edited August 25, 2019 by mniceguy16

[Ajk3visa 12]

25 minutes ago, mniceguy16 said:

I don't remember smiling during my interview because my IO was frowning throughout giving me the impression that I was being intimidated, I just kept a straight face, answered all questions asked while keeping the "eyeball to eyeball" contact and even when he was done I was standing there waiting for a reply from him on the status of the interview, he just kept typing and it felt like an eternity. He got up, left without saying anything and I still stood there. He noticed I was standing there, came back and said "you are free to go". Btw I was handed the form on how to pay the gc fees even before he took my supporting documents and began asking me questions like I said earlier, 90% of the decisions are taken even before the interview begins officially. Just be calm, dress normally and decently, there is no dress code, wear a clean dress, nothing seductive or provocative and you will be fine.

Thats good so they hand everyone a form on how to pay the gc before they interview them which means you were approved before the interview. I hope they routinely do this to everyone and they hand me how to pay the gc before they start interviewing me so i calm down.  Cant wait for the interview day. 

[Daphne . 1,691]

4 minutes ago, Ajk3visa said:

Thats good so they hand everyone a form on how to pay the gc before they interview them which means you were approved before the interview. I hope they routinely do this to everyone and they hand me how to pay the gc before they start interviewing me so i calm down.  Cant wait for the interview day. 

No, this did not happen in AMS with me. I received that form in the visa packet. So this was after my visa was approved, issued and when I received my passport back.

[Ajk3visa 12]

2 minutes ago, Daphne K said:

No, this did not happen in AMS with me. I received that form in the visa packet. So this was after my visa was approved, issued and when I received my passport back.

😯. I should lower my expectaion lol. 

[Daphne . 1,691]

6 minutes ago, Ajk3visa said:

😯. I should lower my expectaion lol. 

None of the other people (10-15) that were interviewed at AMS walked away with a form in their hands so it was not just me.

But you will hear their decision at the end of the interview anyway so you will know something.

Edited August 25, 2019 by Daphne K

[mniceguy16 184]

9 hours ago, Ajk3visa said:

Thats good so they hand everyone a form on how to pay the gc before they interview them which means you were approved before the interview. I hope they routinely do this to everyone and they hand me how to pay the gc before they start interviewing me so i calm down.  Cant wait for the interview day. 

Every situation is different and IOs are different too. I was never handed a paper saying "your visa is approved" but was handed a piece of paper telling me congratulations on immigrating to USA etc and explaining how to pay $220 online for my gc. This was before I was even asked by co to hand over our other docs which were not collected on window 7 (Kyiv embassy). The day my passport arrived, I had another one in the package so reason why I strongly believe that they decide on the visas even before they sit to start the interview, maybe our appearance at the counters there is just to clear their doubts, in all, just get all docs ready and be calm, there's nothing to be scared of especially if the relationship was genuine and I know your husband will be there with you to watch over you.

[The_Empyrean 733]

Hi,

Sorry to hear what happened in the past.
Regards to interview. Don't forget, officers are people (believe it or not! lol). So rather than doing it through a fake smile, be yourself. If it was me, i'd disclose to the officer that the husband topic is still sensitive to you, and you might have issues controlling your emotions, but otherwise you'll do Your best. They understand how hard it is, and will definitely be more open to You and cut you some slack if they are aware of your overwhelming emotions. I got the Overactive bladder (taboo that everyone is scared about to tell someone), and once i get stressed, lets say, i visit the gnomes a lot lol. For my naturalization i was so stressed out in the waiting area, i told the security guard whats up with me, and he said he'll keep an eye if my name gets called, and he did, interviewing officer then asked why the security guy knew my name, and i explained that i didn't want to miss my turn because of the health issues that are out of my control she just smiled at me and said she understand it, and not to worry.

Being honest is better than trying to show who you're not. That's what i learned along the way. Some people won't understand what you're going through, but people who are compassionate, will. Agents are usually trying to get your true image, your overall image, if you start hiding something, not being yourself, they'll notice and will raise more red flags, and it will seem that you're hiding something behind that "smile".
Be yourself and act naturally. If you feel uneasy, and wanna cry, do. They will understand. Ask for a second to get yourself together and continue. 

Stay strong!

[JeanneAdil 6,220]

6 hours ago, mniceguy16 said:

Every situation is different and IOs are different too. I was never handed a paper saying "your visa is approved" but was handed a piece of paper telling me congratulations on immigrating to USA etc and explaining how to pay $220 online for my gc. This was before I was even asked by co to hand over our other docs which were not collected on window 7 (Kyiv embassy). The day my passport arrived, I had another one in the package so reason why I strongly believe that they decide on the visas even before they sit to start the interview, maybe our appearance at the counters there is just to clear their doubts, in all, just get all docs ready and be calm, there's nothing to be scared of especially if the relationship was genuine and I know your husband will be there with you to watch over you.

I would agree somewhat

CO's read thru the packet and base questions on what they deem important

They have a good idea what to ask and look for according to rules they need to follow

For my MIL tourist visa interview,  she recd a paper dated the day before on the decision CO made

 

but immigrants have the ability to aid in the decision made by the CO thru the question period with honest and straigth forward answers 

and,  no to the CO.   the embassies take the visa interview quite serious and you do not need to smile

My husband was asked in a K1 interview "what does your family think of her?"   he smiled as i told him to smile and be polite

the CO said "you smile,  you lie" and denied that k1 application

 

More important the CO for the OP will want to know where the OP  intends to live (without her spouse)/more family here?

and what plans she is making for a future in US (like job or work)

and how long was the relationship 

 

Also 1 VJ member went into a long AP for immigration to get the Saudi police report (as Saudi only gives them to its citizens)

 

You have my best wishes for a complete and happy life

 

[Ajk3visa 12]

On 8/26/2019 at 1:34 PM, The_Empyrean said:

Hi,

Sorry to hear what happened in the past.
Regards to interview. Don't forget, officers are people (believe it or not! lol). So rather than doing it through a fake smile, be yourself. If it was me, i'd disclose to the officer that the husband topic is still sensitive to you, and you might have issues controlling your emotions, but otherwise you'll do Your best. They understand how hard it is, and will definitely be more open to You and cut you some slack if they are aware of your overwhelming emotions. I got the Overactive bladder (taboo that everyone is scared about to tell someone), and once i get stressed, lets say, i visit the gnomes a lot lol. For my naturalization i was so stressed out in the waiting area, i told the security guard whats up with me, and he said he'll keep an eye if my name gets called, and he did, interviewing officer then asked why the security guy knew my name, and i explained that i didn't want to miss my turn because of the health issues that are out of my control she just smiled at me and said she understand it, and not to worry.

Being honest is better than trying to show who you're not. That's what i learned along the way. Some people won't understand what you're going through, but people who are compassionate, will. Agents are usually trying to get your true image, your overall image, if you start hiding something, not being yourself, they'll notice and will raise more red flags, and it will seem that you're hiding something behind that "smile".
Be yourself and act naturally. If you feel uneasy, and wanna cry, do. They will understand. Ask for a second to get yourself together and continue. 

Stay strong!

Thank you so much. This reply is very helpful. I agree with you.  So I should explain to them as u said that my husband topic is still sensitive to me so they consider my emotions.  I  just hope they dont ask too many questions about him that lead me to tell my whole life story since 2015 till now, which I prefer not to talk about things i already talked a lot about in the past. I am so tired of immigration interviews. I already had a 9 hours asylum interview last month here in Netherlands with 3 interview breaks to get my panic attacks cuz it was a so overwhelming interview to me. The worst part, after that longest interview, they didnt approve my asylum cuz of my ties to USA: my child and late husband and they told me go back to USA u lived there for 7 years in the past, u have a SSN, U worked there, u have a US husband and a child, and family in law there so that is ur third safe country. So now i have 2 lawyers who are working on my Widow visa. My asylum lawyer of NL, and my American lawyer. Such a complicated life im in now.

[The_Empyrean 733]

5 minutes ago, Ajk3visa said:

Thank you so much. This reply is very helpful. I agree with you.  So I should explain to them as u said that my husband topic is still sensitive to me so they consider my emotions.  I  just hope they dont ask too many questions about him that lead me to tell my whole life story since 2015 till now, which I prefer not to talk about things i already talked a lot about in the past. I am so tired of immigration interviews. I already had a 9 hours asylum interview last month here in Netherlands with 3 interview breaks to get my panic attacks cuz it was a so overwhelming interview to me. The worst part, after that longest interview, they didnt approve my asylum cuz of my ties to USA: my child and late husband and they told me go back to USA u lived there for 7 years in the past, u have a SSN, U worked there, u have a US husband and a child, and family in law there so that is ur third safe country. So now i have 2 lawyers who are working on my Widow visa. My asylum lawyer of NL, and my American lawyer. Such a complicated life im in now.

Well, they wont consider your emotions to support your case. But it'll give you a second to get yourself together in case you're gonna cry on have a panic attack, and they will be more understanding about that. 

If it is genuine and your paperwork is in order, you should be fine.

[Ajk3visa 12]

On 8/26/2019 at 4:03 PM, JeanneAdil said:

I would agree somewhat

CO's read thru the packet and base questions on what they deem important

They have a good idea what to ask and look for according to rules they need to follow

For my MIL tourist visa interview,  she recd a paper dated the day before on the decision CO made

 

but immigrants have the ability to aid in the decision made by the CO thru the question period with honest and straigth forward answers 

and,  no to the CO.   the embassies take the visa interview quite serious and you do not need to smile

My husband was asked in a K1 interview "what does your family think of her?"   he smiled as i told him to smile and be polite

the CO said "you smile,  you lie" and denied that k1 application

 

More important the CO for the OP will want to know where the OP  intends to live (without her spouse)/more family here?

and what plans she is making for a future in US (like job or work)

and how long was the relationship 

 

Also 1 VJ member went into a long AP for immigration to get the Saudi police report (as Saudi only gives them to its citizens)

 

You have my best wishes for a complete and happy life

 

You mean if i have more family in shoul Should i tell them i plan to live with my mother in law, my daughter grandmother?! Or should i tell them i will live in my own place but near my child grandmother, uncles and cousins?! What is the best answer they prefer?! Is it ok to tell them im gonna live at my friend's ( she is a nurse like me and she is ready to help me staying with her till i start working. She and her family are almost like a family to me i know her since 2011)  then i move to my owm place omce i get a jon. And i am eligible to work in USA cuz i have a SSN cuz i worked before in a hospital ( same hospital my late husband died in ).  So i wont wait for the SSN card cuz i already have it. 

Do u think they will put me on AP cuz i dont have my saudi police certificate? Even if i submitted a waiver for that?! Are they gonna ask the saudi governement for my police ertifiacte and tell them im in NL?! They shouldnt do that for my safety. Once the SA government knows im in NL as a refugee, they will arrest me and send me back to SA. Cuz asylum is a crime for them. They track saudi women abroad just to make sure they didn't apply for asylum. Once they know a saudi woman applied for asylum, will send ( a saudi version James bond lol) to arrest her or kill her. 

[JeanneAdil 6,220]

You just need to say where you will live / give a US address  as that is where your green card will be mailed / and immigration does not care who it is

and i think (but am not sure ) that a waiver will work   this i have no idea or opinion about

i just know another who had to be in AP a year while they waited for clrearance

but you have applied for CR1 as widow not for asylum and this also i don't know about 

You married a USC and this is how immigration sees it 

[Jojojijo 1]

1 hour ago, Ajk3visa said:

You mean if i have more family in shoul Should i tell them i plan to live with my mother in law, my daughter grandmother?! Or should i tell them i will live in my own place but near my child grandmother, uncles and cousins?! What is the best answer they prefer?! Is it ok to tell them im gonna live at my friend's ( she is a nurse like me and she is ready to help me staying with her till i start working. She and her family are almost like a family to me i know her since 2011)  then i move to my owm place omce i get a jon. And i am eligible to work in USA cuz i have a SSN cuz i worked before in a hospital ( same hospital my late husband died in ).  So i wont wait for the SSN card cuz i already have it. 

Do u think they will put me on AP cuz i dont have my saudi police certificate? Even if i submitted a waiver for that?! Are they gonna ask the saudi governement for my police ertifiacte and tell them im in NL?! They shouldnt do that for my safety. Once the SA government knows im in NL as a refugee, they will arrest me and send me back to SA. Cuz asylum is a crime for them. They track saudi women abroad just to make sure they didn't apply for asylum. Once they know a saudi woman applied for asylum, will send ( a saudi version James bond lol) to arrest her or kill her. 

Saudi Pcc is unavailable for those who are not legal residents,from nvc site,am Indian I left Saudi 5 years back,without take Saudi Pcc, and embassy know it is unavailable,it’s not problem,if u have active resident u have to get it