Older American woman younger Egyptian man

[debbiedoo 2,339]

43 minutes ago, MaryJean said:

I'm hoping that 35000 mentioned in a previous comment was a typo and it was really supposed to be 3500???What scares me most is the timeline of all of this. I'm not getting any younger and I want to start whatever I have left of my life with this man.  

 

 

Ummmm .. my fiance is only in Canada, and we've spent FAR more than 3500 on trips over the past 2 years. We are in the unusual, and extremely lucky , situation that he comes here every month, given the closeness. Hek, and thats with him making the 12 hour drive, and not flying it.  My flights up there a few times a year have cost more than the 3500, though.

 

None of us are getting younger. We ALL want to be with our partners. And NO.... chatting online is NOT the same as being with them in person. You are more than old enough to realize this. Personally, I would not marry someone I only met once. or twice. or three times. or 4 times. But thats ME. I had 20 years of hell with my first marriage and I'll be damned if I do it again. Even with all the time we have spent together, Im STILL nervous about the 'what ifs'. and I've seen him mad, and upset, and sad, and disappointed, and stressed. As he has me. But its STILL not the SAME.

 

The consulate you will be dealing with, is going to be HARD. So many obstacles and red flags. Even if it were a perfect match with NO red flags, its a difficult consulate.

 

You need to prepare. Financially and emotionally. Because this forum conversation will be a CAKE WALK compared to what you are embarking upon.

 

[old-fella 109]

you have already received far better advise. I can't add anything more as people have tried hammering right thing in your thought process.

 

we have an age difference and it's 20 years but in our case, none of us were married ever. We dated for a while and married after a couple of visits. We were denied in a 1st interview and then in the 2nd interview, we were approved. We had like 7 visits before the 2nd interview, lots of co-finance mingling. lots of evidence.

 

REMEMBER THIS PROCESS IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY OR CHEAP.  This will be an emotional roller coaster, tedious, painful and very very nerve-racking which will make you bleed financially. This process is seriously not for weak heart. 

 

Age difference won't stop you and couldn't be the reason to deny visa but it will be the reason (they won't say it but yes this will be biggest red flag). What you can do to overcome this is lots of face time together with family, friends etc.  Everything online is rosy (even farts are cute when it's long distance online relationship) but boy there are so many things that tick off people in real life. 

 

The amount of 35000 mentioned by someone earlier is actually the lower side cost. We spent around 45k in total (now my wife says.. you can't buy mustang ever coz we paid the money for the visa). 

 

we have seen so many stories here in VJ. so people tend to be straightforward and reply which kind of seems to be judgemental but trust me when we say things we say its because of the experience we have been through.  Goodluck and best wishes. do whatever you want 'coz we can only advise. however stay sharp and keep your 6th sense open. 

[Crazy Cat 39,227]

OP-  The posters here are usually pretty objective, and we have seen a multitude of cases almost identical to your case.  Most of those cases end poorly.  You have mentioned several significant obstacles which will not be remedied by a 2 week visit.....or marriage on the first visit.  In my opinion, you are looking at a very long, uphill battle. A 29 year age difference and different religions will receive a lot of scrutiny. In addition, 1 or 2 denied tourist visas could be seen as desperation to get to the US.  Please heed the advice given by the seasoned posters here.  Don't rush your marriage, and Do front load your petition with as much face time evidence as you can. 

GOOD LUCK.

[visaqueries 111]

8 hours ago, MaryJean said:

The reason he stated for his tourist visa was that he was coming to visit a friend, me.  We were not engaged at that time.  He will most likely say again that he is coming to visit me when he applies for a B2 Visa in August.  Will that hurt or help us?  I'm so confused right now I'm not sure what we should do.

 

And to your second point about visiting him during the application process, that's already something we did speak about.  And we thought it would be a good idea for me to try to at least come for one more visit after the initial visit/marriage trip. 

 

Do you think our chances would be greater if I went for 2 weeks and then came back and applied for the K1 visa?  I've heard that because of our age difference the K-1 Visa will be more difficult than the cr1?  What do you all think?

We knew after he applied for the first tourist visa, he'd never be granted a tourist visa.  He brought to the tourist visa interview evidence of owning property (car and apartment), information regarding his job that he'd had for 10 years, and other ties to his country (caring for his widowed mother/only child living with her).  They didn't look at any of it.  My opinion is that your fiance will be denied again.  I would save that money for other trips you can make because there's not much chance he will be visiting the US.  

 

I knew Egypt was tough when we started the process, so I did all the research I could.  I read posts from other Egyptian petitioners.  I looked through all the guides to see what would be valuable evidence, and together my fiance and I worked on making sure we had solid evidence.  It wasn't romantic in the least, but we really looked at all angles to ask ourselves, "What's going to get us denied?"  Then we worked on those weaknesses to try and turn them into strengths.  We knew how we felt about each other, but we needed to present it in the most effective way.  

 

It took us from August 2012 until February 2014 to be approved for a K1 in Egypt.  Thankfully, we were approved on our first try.  Just to clarify...I met him in 2009 as he was in charge of my friend and my Egyptian vacation.  He got married and divorced during that time.  We didn't communicate until his marriage ended and were seriously talking by April 2012. He was denied a visitor visa.  I visited in May 2012 then we filed the petition after I had that one month stay in Egypt.  I visited 2 weeks at Christmas 2012, 70 days in the summer of 2013, 2 weeks at Christmas 2013 (arrived two days after his interview...he showed my flight information).  So, we did all we could to have face time, so they would have less questions about our intentions.  We took pictures of us with his friends, and we included messages from a mutual friend who emailed both of us in the same email but had not ever seen us together.  

 

So, my advice is to develop your relationship.  That will be good for you.  AND, develop your evidence.  That will be good for your case.  

 

***In hindsight, I wish we would have done the CR1.  However, I didn't feel we really knew each other well enough to go the CR1 route.  

 

[MohamedAndRebecca 3]

On ‎6‎/‎26‎/‎2018 at 12:28 PM, MaryJean said:

I wish I had the means and luxury of traveling back and forth to Egypt but I am not a rich woman and I have commitments here that prevent me from traveling. I'm lucky that I'm managing to get there for one visit. And I can't relocate to Egypt.   

 

I am so sorry and I mean no offence by this, but immigration doesn't care about this :-\  They aren't going to make exceptions for such a case.  Our personal issues and circumstances are not their problem.

Best to listen to the other advice here, and re-evaluate a few things.

[Beth & Achraf 328]

Since he was married before, make sure he has a IRREVOCABLE DIVORCE  and shown  on his divorce papers, USCIS will not accept anything less.

Take it slow, get to know him and his family, friends.    Yes it takes time, but best for you in the long run. 

 

[MaryJean 2]

He was never married.  I was previously married, and I have taken care of all the necessary paperwork. We are ready to go ahead with the marriage. Thank you 😊

[SJordanS 342]

On 1/17/2019 at 1:17 PM, MaryJean said:

He was never married.  I was previously married, and I have taken care of all the necessary paperwork. We are ready to go ahead with the marriage. Thank you 😊

Would you mind coming back here and posting your experience after you eventually finish your CR1 interview? It would be helpful to so  many. Thanks.