coforever

Hello!
 
We just got our biometrics done last Friday after waiting a looooong time. Is anyone else on same boat?
 
I think our field office is just really backed up or something.
 
Hopefully the rest will go faster! 🤞

Don’t worry, it will come, mine took 9months , they just  sent it biometric appointment letter last week for end of july
i was worried too but didn’t email any entity,
just a lil hope for you

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Hi there, sorry about your loss and I empathize with you in this situation. Also with all you explained here that you have been through over the years it is easy to yearn for someone’s attention and easily confuse it for being in love,not saying you are not in love or loved back.but matters of immigration is better to go into it with eyes wide open.
 
My advise like others have said ,don’t for any reason marry someone you haven’t spent time with in their home and met his people(family and friends ) Get to know this person properly before committing yourself .Even if you get to see him now the process with this COVID backlog will still take nothing less than 8 to 12 months 
 
Immigration is a very expensive journey even with a joint sponsor, 
 
Just a few mins ago I read on this site of a woman that said the husband has a wife and kid all the while they are married and I felt so sorry for her, this is the reason I always advise people going into it to make sure they do all due diligence(your own investigation ) and convinced without doubt to avoid regrets. Though one can’t know it all.
 

Gambia will be strict? How?  I guess you meant to say the US embassy? Because a country can't stop her citizen from travelling as long as they have the appropriate travel document to that country.

Gambia will be strict? How?  I guess you meant to say the US embassy? Because a country can't stop her citizen from travelling as long as they have the appropriate travel document to that country.

you see, this is so sad that your brother would use your hard earned money like that,thats where enabling comes from. Imagine if this continues like this you are not helping him be serious in life or independent in the future. Maybe you should have a serious talk with him about what he really wanna do in life. Then draw the line. If you can only send the money for his education which I will advice not to give it to him personally. Pay his fees and let him figure the rest out. That is too much pressure on you and I understand how hurt you would feel to see this outcome from him. ,just take things easy tho. Don't let family drama take away the happiness from your life and your marriage even though it's difficult,just try

Same here. I can't say no to my mom too and I wouldnt want her to not ask when she needs but I said budget irrespective of if she asks. More like a monthly or 2weeks thing. That way she would have enough when the need arises. 
For your sister,i would think the logically thing here if you weren't abroad is to live on her pay grade. Why get a house you can't pay for with your salary. In Nigeria we pay rents yearly(so with that salary you should figure out how to save up for that rent during the year with whatever salary you have) . So depends on your country,why send 250usd monthly to a house where she makes 1/3 of the rent monthly. That is way above her pay grade and those are the things you should talk to them about. Imagine send 250usd monthly to your sister that is working, another $$ to the one in school and some more for mom. That is alot of monthly expenditure. Not even including unforeseen circumstances that requires money before those monthly expenses. Then imagine your husband taking care of most the bills maybe including your school which you are going to still help your family.(I hope you don't say that too much to his hearing tho) . Turn the situation around. 

you see, this is so sad that your brother would use your hard earned money like that,thats where enabling comes from. Imagine if this continues like this you are not helping him be serious in life or independent in the future. Maybe you should have a serious talk with him about what he really wanna do in life. Then draw the line. If you can only send the money for his education which I will advice not to give it to him personally. Pay his fees and let him figure the rest out. That is too much pressure on you and I understand how hurt you would feel to see this outcome from him. ,just take things easy tho. Don't let family drama take away the happiness from your life and your marriage even though it's difficult,just try

Maybe too much but proof of relationship is definitely required. Save you so much to front load them. That way they have enough evidence even before your interview as you will still need to take more evidences with you to your interview. We frontloaded and during interview ofcourse I went ready with a file load of evidence but non was checked because the office said he had all the evidence he needed in the file sent from NVC. 
so be double prepared. But all documents and evidences at this point shouldn't be more than one big size envelope. If that makes sense. Lol. 

Same here. I can't say no to my mom too and I wouldnt want her to not ask when she needs but I said budget irrespective of if she asks. More like a monthly or 2weeks thing. That way she would have enough when the need arises. 
For your sister,i would think the logically thing here if you weren't abroad is to live on her pay grade. Why get a house you can't pay for with your salary. In Nigeria we pay rents yearly(so with that salary you should figure out how to save up for that rent during the year with whatever salary you have) . So depends on your country,why send 250usd monthly to a house where she makes 1/3 of the rent monthly. That is way above her pay grade and those are the things you should talk to them about. Imagine send 250usd monthly to your sister that is working, another $$ to the one in school and some more for mom. That is alot of monthly expenditure. Not even including unforeseen circumstances that requires money before those monthly expenses. Then imagine your husband taking care of most the bills maybe including your school which you are going to still help your family.(I hope you don't say that too much to his hearing tho) . Turn the situation around. 

OP needs to watch the bolded carefully. 
Additionally, if you go home, do not tell everyone. Just pop up n pop out when vacation is done. That is a lesson I learnt.
 
Funny, when I went back last year, I explicitly told my young sister (who stays with my married elder sister that picked me from the airport) not to tell any of my cousins I was around. So I am sitting there watching the noon news and in pops one of my cousins. He sat the entire evening, being fed and supplied with my BIL's alcoholic beverages, courtesy of my small sister (I do not drink). Later on when he decides to leave, he suddenly does not have fare. I have to pay. Additionally, he wants pocket money before he leaves. My sister later admitted to telling him that I was around. He then went and told the rest of my cousins and my phone never got a break. Later, my small sister's friend keeps insisting I go out, that she has missed me. It had to be in these upcoming upscale bars that charge a leg and and arm for substandard stuff because they are the "new thing in Kenya that everyone wants to associate with." Funny enough, they are just the standard American bars that people drink while playing board games. However, since they are new in Kenya and with some fancy design, we have to pay massively to use them.
 
Next day I go to town to visit my old workplace. Suddenly, I have to buy them lunch BUT at the upscale restaurant they've always wanted to go to. Nonetheless, I gladly do. Then my old employer wants me to furnish him with $3000 for business. Yes, you read that right. He put me in his car in an underground garage and gave me an hour's run down of this business he wanted to venture in. I had to come up with a good excuse out of this. 
 
I then leave and go to the next town to visit my mom (right before she moved to the US). This is the town where 70% of my extended family is at and so was my childhood. Suddenly:
She is broke My neighbors got wind that I am around, courtesy of my mom My aunties appear - my mom had told them and said it is "bad manners not to tell them I am around" She cannot use public transport. We had to hire a cab which had to pick her right from the doorstep, not even the gate, doorstep.  Few days later, we are going to the village to visit my dad. Again, my mom cannot use public transport. She wants a cab. The village is far away from this city (1 hour away from the nearest town but 7 hours away from where we currently are). She wants the cab for this 7 to 8 hours drive and me to foot the bill. We look for one but end up not getting any as it was a weekend. So we go with the upscale public transport. 
 
Our first public transport only goes 90% of the journey. We have to jump on another to finish the trip. My mom had already organized a cab. The guy picks us up for the remaining 1 hour journey to the village. We get there, my mom does not want to alight at the gate. The guy had to drop her off at the doorstep. Villagers mill around and come to help us carry our shopping into the house. I do not recall carrying anything into the house. The villagers had carried everything within a minute of us getting here.
 
Next day, the cab comes back to take us one hour drive deep in the village to look at some investment. We get there, but the remaining (2 mins by car, 10 mins one way by foot) drive is rocky and unattainable for the low car. My dad walks me out of the cab and we walk to the site. Unbeknownst to me, he was only surveying the route because when we got to the site, he told us to head back and now come back with the car as he had seen a possible route🤦‍♂️. So we had to walk back (10mins), get the car and make the GRAND entrance at the site. The cab had to also be parked strategically at the site. Then the villagers came. We had to part with $$ so as to make him not look bad, courtesy of the status they have created in the village. 
 
Surprisingly, when I left the US for vacation, I only wore flip flops under my feet. They proved convenient at airport security check points. When I landed in Kenya, they looked at me surprised as if we walk on air in America and not flip flops.  
 
I cannot, even
I hope my story is hilarious.
And by the way, this is all true
 
 

I will say you actually do alot for your family, I think you should also tall to your siblings to be more involved in taking some responsibility, I was a student and working at the same time in my country and taking care of my younger brother,so being in school is not enough reason for someone not be responsible. talk to your family especially sibling about taking some stuff off your shoulder. Put your mother on a budget and let her try to manage it. Same as your siblings,you can pay school fees but they should shoulder the other bills.where I come from they say" Problem nor dey finish, enjoy yourself once once"
Take care of yourself and save for your future also because you,your husband and kids matter .

I will say you actually do alot for your family, I think you should also tall to your siblings to be more involved in taking some responsibility, I was a student and working at the same time in my country and taking care of my younger brother,so being in school is not enough reason for someone not be responsible. talk to your family especially sibling about taking some stuff off your shoulder. Put your mother on a budget and let her try to manage it. Same as your siblings,you can pay school fees but they should shoulder the other bills.where I come from they say" Problem nor dey finish, enjoy yourself once once"
Take care of yourself and save for your future also because you,your husband and kids matter .

Your age and immaturity as pointed out just showed in this your comment.

Lol. People talk about the finance involved. Also for you to be engaged to be married it's no joke and a very serious commitment. Even more difficult when it involves immigration. This is just the beginning of the fees ,see below not including the proof that the petitioner can sustain the beneficiary (i864) and joint sponsor.  
1.Initial filing fees 
2. Visa fees for ds 160
3. Medical fees, 
4.logistics&accommodation in case the clinic and embassy are far from your location
5. Flight cost to the US
Note when you come to the US,you won't be able to work until several months when you get your EAD
6.payment for marriage license within 90days
7. AOS fees over 1000usd that's if USCIs havent succeeded in their increment by the time you guys are done. 
8. Petitioner having extra mouth to feed and cater for. More like x2 of current living cost. 
 
So this is really no joke for 20year olds ,with a waiter job. Be sure of what you want before diving into it and be guided. 
 
 

Wouldn't think too much into it. I used my parents address as my permanent address for everything I do because I change cities alot,so that's what I used in my forms. I also put my current address where I was living at the time of filing but for mailing address I used my work address because I am mostly at work anytime a mail would come. And the mail was sent to my work when it was time. 

Lol. People talk about the finance involved. Also for you to be engaged to be married it's no joke and a very serious commitment. Even more difficult when it involves immigration. This is just the beginning of the fees ,see below not including the proof that the petitioner can sustain the beneficiary (i864) and joint sponsor.  
1.Initial filing fees 
2. Visa fees for ds 160
3. Medical fees, 
4.logistics&accommodation in case the clinic and embassy are far from your location
5. Flight cost to the US
Note when you come to the US,you won't be able to work until several months when you get your EAD
6.payment for marriage license within 90days
7. AOS fees over 1000usd that's if USCIs havent succeeded in their increment by the time you guys are done. 
8. Petitioner having extra mouth to feed and cater for. More like x2 of current living cost. 
 
So this is really no joke for 20year olds ,with a waiter job. Be sure of what you want before diving into it and be guided.