Jump to content
LonelyButHopeful

Complicated Situation, Conflicted on What to Do.

31 posts in this topic

Recommended Posts

Hello everyone. I have a very complicated situation.

 

I came here in the US using my B2 visa on May 2018 to visit my USC boyfriend in South Dakota who I've been dating for 5 years. During my stay, things were going well and we decided to get married on September 2018, and he filed for I-130 and I-485 on my behalf.

 

Soon after that, things got so bad. My husband started to be controlling. He emotionally, mentally and sexually abused me. On December 2018, I flew to California to visit my immediate family members. Things escalated and he started to threaten me that he will call immigration to deport me, divorce me, withdraw my application and "f**k up" my life if I don't go back to South Dakota soon. He also threatened to close our joint bank account, which is the account where my relatives would send money to help us out a bit. This put me more into emotional and mental distress, that I didn't know what to do anymore. Threatened and traumatized on how he treated me back in South Dakota, I didn't think I was ready to come back there anytime soon. I kept all of this to myself, until I finally opened up to one of my closest friends about what has been going on. She then recommended me to go to a Women's Shelter here in California to ask them for help and advice on what to do when I decide to go back to South Dakota.

 

2 weeks ago, I finally took my friend's advice. The people in the Women's Shelter were very helpful, they told me what to do when my husband tries to abuse me again. They oriented me on "Domestic Violence Safety Plan", telling me what to do, what my escape plan would be if my husband tried to abuse me again. They suggested for me to see a therapist to evaluate my mental health. They also gave me a list of non-profit organizations that could help me since I was also threatened by my husband regarding my immigration status.

 

A week ago, I went to a licensed family therapist to evaluate my mental health. She diagnosed me with MDD (Major Depressive Disorder) and she also mentioned that I'm showing signs of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) due to what my husband did to me. She told me to attend therapy with her at least 8x and go to group therapy at the shelter where I went to. I was also given a list of pro bono divorce lawyers if I decided to divorce my husband. She also recommended that I don't go back to South Dakota until I finish my therapy sessions with her and the shelter, to heal my mind to make logical decisions.

 

Yesterday, I had an appointment with an immigration lawyer. She then told me that I may be eligible for VAWA, due to the abuse that was perpetrated by my husband. She told me that my case is weak if I decide to go that route, as I didn't call the police and that emotional and mental abuse is harder to prove than physical abuse and could be risky as if my application got denied, I may be put to removal proceedings.

 

So this is where everything gets complicated: My father, who is undocumented and has been living here in California for 20 years, finally got married to his long time USC partner last June 2018. They filed his I-130 and I-485 shortly after. My father is expecting to be interviewed on January 2019. Assuming that my father and step-mother would have a successful interview and the petition filed by my step-mother gets approved:

- Will my father and step-mother be able to petition me instead if I decided to divorce my husband?

- What will happen to my marriage-based I-130 and I-485 that's still pending?

- Will I have to go back to my home country if I decide to go this route?

 

At this point, I am so broken. I don't want anything to do with my husband who violated me in ways I cannot comprehend. To anyone who took time to read this, thank you. I hope someone out here can answer my questions..

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Will my father and step-mother be able to petition me instead if I decided to divorce my husband? There's a long wait time b4 parent can petition for you

 

What will happen to my marriage-based I-130 and I-485 that's still pending? If your husband pulls out his Affidavit of support, you'll be out of status

 

Will I have to go back to my home country if I decide to go this route? if you go back to you country, you will be barred/ denied re-entry due to your current status/ immigration intentions

Edited by kingdomcome84

NoA1 - September 26, 2018

NoA2 - February 4, 2019  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
31 minutes ago, LonelyButHopeful said:

Hello everyone. I have a very complicated situation.

 

I came here in the US using my B2 visa on May 2018 to visit my USC boyfriend in South Dakota who I've been dating for 5 years. During my stay, things were going well and we decided to get married on September 2018, and he filed for I-130 and I-485 on my behalf.

 

Soon after that, things got so bad. My husband started to be controlling. He emotionally, mentally and sexually abused me. On December 2018, I flew to California to visit my immediate family members. Things escalated and he started to threaten me that he will call immigration to deport me, divorce me, withdraw my application and "f**k up" my life if I don't go back to South Dakota soon. He also threatened to close our joint bank account, which is the account where my relatives would send money to help us out a bit. This put me more into emotional and mental distress, that I didn't know what to do anymore. Threatened and traumatized on how he treated me back in South Dakota, I didn't think I was ready to come back there anytime soon. I kept all of this to myself, until I finally opened up to one of my closest friends about what has been going on. She then recommended me to go to a Women's Shelter here in California to ask them for help and advice on what to do when I decide to go back to South Dakota.

 

2 weeks ago, I finally took my friend's advice. The people in the Women's Shelter were very helpful, they told me what to do when my husband tries to abuse me again. They oriented me on "Domestic Violence Safety Plan", telling me what to do, what my escape plan would be if my husband tried to abuse me again. They suggested for me to see a therapist to evaluate my mental health. They also gave me a list of non-profit organizations that could help me since I was also threatened by my husband regarding my immigration status.

 

A week ago, I went to a licensed family therapist to evaluate my mental health. She diagnosed me with MDD (Major Depressive Disorder) and she also mentioned that I'm showing signs of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) due to what my husband did to me. She told me to attend therapy with her at least 8x and go to group therapy at the shelter where I went to. I was also given a list of pro bono divorce lawyers if I decided to divorce my husband. She also recommended that I don't go back to South Dakota until I finish my therapy sessions with her and the shelter, to heal my mind to make logical decisions.

 

Yesterday, I had an appointment with an immigration lawyer. She then told me that I may be eligible for VAWA, due to the abuse that was perpetrated by my husband. She told me that my case is weak if I decide to go that route, as I didn't call the police and that emotional and mental abuse is harder to prove than physical abuse and could be risky as if my application got denied, I may be put to removal proceedings.

 

So this is where everything gets complicated: My father, who is undocumented and has been living here in California for 20 years, finally got married to his long time USC partner last June 2018. They filed his I-130 and I-485 shortly after. My father is expecting to be interviewed on January 2019. Assuming that my father and step-mother would have a successful interview and the petition filed by my step-mother gets approved:

- Will my father and step-mother be able to petition me instead if I decided to divorce my husband?

- What will happen to my marriage-based I-130 and I-485 that's still pending?

- Will I have to go back to my home country if I decide to go this route?

 

At this point, I am so broken. I don't want anything to do with my husband who violated me in ways I cannot comprehend. To anyone who took time to read this, thank you. I hope someone out here can answer my questions..

 

 

You were married one month when all this happened, VAWA case does seem weak...However, I do not know too much about it. When your father gets approved, he will get a PR not citizenship. I would consult the same attorney and see what he says. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)
5 minutes ago, kingdomcome84 said:

 

What will happen to my marriage-based I-130 and I-485 that's still pending? If your husband pulls out his Affidavit of support, you'll be out of status

He can  pull out his Affidavit of support because she does not have a conditional GC right? What if she received her conditional, would the husband be able to pull out the affidavit of support?

Edited by PolarPear

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think no matter how long the marriage was, there is always a chance to try VAWA in case there are signs of abuse. And evidently there are quite a few from what is written here. 

If I were you, I’d consult a lawyer experienced in VAWA. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, kingdomcome84 said:

Will my father and step-mother be able to petition me instead if I decided to divorce my husband? There's a long wait time b4 parent can petition for you

 

What will happen to my marriage-based I-130 and I-485 that's still pending? If your husband pulls out his Affidavit of support, you'll be out of status

 

Will I have to go back to my home country if I decide to go this route? if you go back to you country, you will be barred/ denied re-entry due to your current status/ immigration intentions

One of my relatives is a joint sponsor as my husband did not meet the required income. I'm not quite sure if having a joint sponsor matters on my current situation..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)
13 minutes ago, LonelyButHopeful said:

One of my relatives is a joint sponsor as my husband did not meet the required income. I'm not quite sure if having a joint sponsor matters on my current situation..

To continue the pending I-485 his I-864 is needed regardless. So, if he withdraws the I-864 before the I-485 is approved that's a dead end.

 

Consult an immigration attorney that specializes on VAWA. Or leave the US and wait until your father becomes an LPR. If divorced by then, wait abroad for the F2B process to complete. Also, remain unmarried until you enter the US with the immigrant visa.

Edited by HRQX

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, HRQX said:

To continue the pending I-485 his I-864 is needed regardless. So, if he withdraws the I-864 before the I-485 is approved that's a dead end.

 

Consult an immigration attorney that specializes on VAWA. Or leave the US and wait until your father becomes a US citizen. Then wait abroad for either the F2B or F3 process to complete.

Hello there, would it be necessary to wait for my father to become a US citizen? I found this on the July 2019 Visa Bulletin of travel.state.gov and based on my understanding, a permanent resident's unmarried sons and daughters classify as F2B:

 

FAMILY-SPONSORED PREFERENCES

First: (F1) Unmarried Sons and Daughters of U.S. Citizens:  23,400 plus any numbers not required for fourth preference.

Second: Spouses and Children, and Unmarried Sons and Daughters of Permanent Residents:  114,200, plus the number (if any) by which the worldwide family preference level exceeds 226,000, plus any unused first preference numbers:

A. (F2A) Spouses and Children of Permanent Residents:  77% of the overall second preference limitation, of which 75% are exempt from the per-country limit;

B. (F2B) Unmarried Sons and Daughters (21 years of age or older) of Permanent Residents:  23% of the overall second preference limitation.

Third: (F3) Married Sons and Daughters of U.S. Citizens:  23,400, plus any numbers not required by first and second preferences.

Fourth: (F4) Brothers and Sisters of Adult U.S. Citizens:  65,000, plus any numbers not required by first three preferences.

 

Which leads me to my next question: If I get a divorce, will I be considered as "unmarried"?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Once you are divorced you are unmarried.

 

For those who did not read the OP's initial post she did consult an Immigration Lawyer and was told she had a weak case.


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, LonelyButHopeful said:

If I get a divorce, will I be considered as "unmarried"?

Yes. The caveat is that you must remain unmarried until you enter the US with the immigrant visa.

8 hours ago, LonelyButHopeful said:

Hello there, would it be necessary to wait for my father to become a US citizen?

You are correct; I quickly updated my post above. If he becomes a citizen, then your case will change to F1 category. The visa bulletin could differ in the future, since it fluctuates.

 

After he naturalizes, if you don't remain unmarried then it changes from F1 to F3 category.

1 hour ago, Boiler said:

she did consult an Immigration Lawyer and was told she had a weak case.

True. Can always get a second legal opinion from one that specializes in VAWA.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, LonelyButHopeful said:

My father, who is undocumented and has been living here in California for 20 years, finally got married to his long time USC partner last June 2018. They filed his I-130 and I-485 shortly after. My father is expecting to be interviewed on January 2019

So he already had his interview? How did your father enter the US? 



 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"So this is where everything gets complicated: My father, who is undocumented and has been living here in California for 20 years, finally got married to his long time USC partner last June 2018. They filed his I-130 and I-485 shortly after. My father is expecting to be interviewed on January 2019. "

 

I'm confused what you said. I didn't know when you are undocumented you could adjust status.

Also what happened st interview in January?

He interviewed back in his country correct.

Ypu really need a good lawyer.

 


Case Complete to Interview spreadsheet

From now on your VJ Member name will be verified. If the name you put on form to be added to spreadsheet comes up not found, you will not be added to the spreadsheet. If you don't have a timeline you will not be added to the spreadsheet.
Please Please put your VJ member name only. Not nicknames or real names whatever your VJ name is. It's below your profile picture!!

:goofy:


Come join the current Interview thread: 

Case-Complete-to-Interview-June-2019/

Case Complete to Interview Form
Case Complete to Interview Spreadsheet
NVC Filers Wiki Process

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
 
Didn't find the answer you were looking for? Ask our VJ Immigration Lawyers.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
- Back to Top -


Important Disclaimer: Please read carefully the Visajourney.com Terms of Service. If you do not agree to the Terms of Service you should not access or view any page (including this page) on VisaJourney.com. Answers and comments provided on Visajourney.com Forums are general information, and are not intended to substitute for informed professional medical, psychiatric, psychological, tax, legal, investment, accounting, or other professional advice. Visajourney.com does not endorse, and expressly disclaims liability for any product, manufacturer, distributor, service or service provider mentioned or any opinion expressed in answers or comments. VisaJourney.com does not condone immigration fraud in any way, shape or manner. VisaJourney.com recommends that if any member or user knows directly of someone involved in fraudulent or illegal activity, that they report such activity directly to the Department of Homeland Security, Immigration and Customs Enforcement. You can contact ICE via email at Immigration.Reply@dhs.gov or you can telephone ICE at 1-866-347-2423. All reported threads/posts containing reference to immigration fraud or illegal activities will be removed from this board. If you feel that you have found inappropriate content, please let us know by contacting us here with a url link to that content. Thank you.
×
×
  • Create New...