Proving a bonafide relationship with limited time together

[ilikepotatoes 37]

Hi everyone. Having a bit of an issue, and just feeling anxious and uncertain about what to do.

 

I met my fiancé three years ago through a mutual Facebook friend. We’ve spoken just about everyday since. After a year of speaking, we really felt like we wanted to be together. At this point, I had two very unwell parents (my mother had cancer and father had a number of physical ailments) and I was unable to travel. Early 2020, we planned for him to come visit me and meet my family, but then COVID hit and ruined our chances. He’s not from a VWP country.  I then planned to visit him that fall for a few weeks, but tragically, my mother passed away in November. 
 

Last week, I was able to book a flight to go see him for 1-2 months. I leave on the 30th. 
 

What my fiancé and I are hoping to do, is at some point during my stay, we’d get married via a Zoom ceremony. This is the only plausible way for us to marry. He’s currently studying at a medical school in Ukraine, which is not his home country. I’ve been told by many people that marrying there is very very difficult for couples, so we talked about it and decided that we wouldn’t go that route. We’ve also investigated marriage in his home country, which also comes with many rules and regulations regarding the marriage process; I was told by an immigration lawyer there that I would have to be present in the country for at least 30 days, before being able to file for a marriage license. After a two month stay in Ukraine, an additional 30 days in another country, just doesn’t seem feasible financially....with the added concern of my father’s health and well-being while I’m away. Now throw COVID in the mix, and you have a big, insurmountable mess. That’s why we chose Zoom.
 

So right now, we are hoping to marry when I visit him, a few weeks after meeting. But I’m concerned about whether we will have enough evidence to prove that we are truly genuine with how we feel about one another. My father and his family are on board with this; initially, we thought we’d be able to have my father present, in person, for the Zoom ceremony, but after thinking about it, that would require him to take a flight by himself, which he might not be safe to do, due to his medical conditions. He’s also on medication that I think is prohibited in Ukraine. 
 

I’m not sure what to do now. Because of the unpredictability of government and COVID, we really want to marry...we don’t know when we will be able to see each other again. But I’m also scared that we won’t have enough evidence....especially since we might not be able to have my father with us as originally planned. 
 

Do we still have a chance at being approved for the spouse visa, even after one meeting? If we explained our reasoning, might that provide a good enough explanation? Any advice is greatly appreciated, but please try to not be too judgmental...I understand our situation is a bit unconventional, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s wrong. Thank you all in advance. 🙏

[JFH 12,189]

If you feel you know each well enough and have a strong enough relationship to get married the first time you meet, then what are you concerned about? If you are doubting that the relationship “looks genuine”, ask yourself why? What’s the rush to get married on the first visit? Are you planning to return to visit again? 
 

Evidence of time spent together is the best evidence. Because of your choices you will have a lack of this type of evidence. That can be overcome with plenty of other forms of evidence. 

[pushbrk 12,108]

Two months is better than one.  The more time together, the better, BUT, really a month or more together is more than a lot of successful visa processes can demonstrate.  Not every red flag is a death sentence.  Your plan sounds fine.  Take lots of photos in different places and at different times.  Keep your boarding passes.  Expect success.  You don't mention his home country, and that IS important, but sounds like Russia or another FSU country.  All pretty much the same risk.

[ilikepotatoes 37]

8 minutes ago, JFH said:

If you feel you know each well enough and have a strong enough relationship to get married the first time you meet, then what are you concerned about? If you are doubting that the relationship “looks genuine”, ask yourself why? What’s the rush to get married on the first visit? Are you planning to return to visit again? 
 

Evidence of time spent together is the best evidence. Because of your choices you will have a lack of this type of evidence. That can be overcome with plenty of other forms of evidence. 

We want to be married because we don’t know when the next time we will be able to see each other again will be. The other issue is because I have my father at home who needs care. He’s a high fracture risk, and has other ailments as well. This year alone he’s broken multiple bones. The reason I’m able to travel now, is because a family friend is kind enough to help out this time around; but he can’t always, as he has a family of his own. 
 

What are other forms of evidence that we can submit? We aren’t concerned about how our relationship “looks,” it’s just I’ve heard other people talk about having much time in person, and I’m concerned about that issue with us. Thanks for answering! 

[igoyougoduke 1,604]

If the marriage is for immigration purpose only that you don't have a strong case here. He is studying in Ukraine, you havent even met each other.. and others.. weak evidence.  Its really not strong evidence with regards to immigration, that you can meet some one on a website and you are choosing to get married. Immigration simply will look at this high fraud.

 

If your marriage is cause you want to get married, nothing is going to stop you from doing it.  When it comes to immigration they want evidence. Its just simple facts 

 

You do realize you need financial support to sponsor him right ?

Edited March 27, 2021 by igoyougoduke

[ilikepotatoes 37]

4 minutes ago, pushbrk said:

Two months is better than one.  The more time together, the better, BUT, really a month or more together is more than a lot of successful visa processes can demonstrate.  Not every red flag is a death sentence.  Your plan sounds fine.  Take lots of photos in different places and at different times.  Keep your boarding passes.  Expect success.  You don't mention his home country, and that IS important, but sounds like Russia or another FSU country.  All pretty much the same risk.

Thank you so much...this makes me feel a lot better. Are pictures taken with an iPhone and then later printed out, okay? Or is there some other better way to document our time together? I also have logs from every message we’ve sent since we first spoke three years ago. Also, I actually had his name added to my mother’s obituary where they listed her surviving relatives and their spouses/fiancés. I saved that for evidence too. Our families are aware of our relationship. 

[Lucky2Lucky 2,526]

After you get married you can add him as a joint user on your credit card to start commingling your finances. You can also add him as a beneficiary to your life insurance/401k etc. I don’t think you mentioned his home country as that could raise red flags it would be helpful to share. Take photos with his family/friends and at different locations. Don’t just have selfies to submit. Good luck.

[ilikepotatoes 37]

11 minutes ago, Luckycuds said:

After you get married you can add him as a joint user on your credit card to start commingling your finances. You can also add him as a beneficiary to your life insurance/401k etc. I don’t think you mentioned his home country as that could raise red flags it would be helpful to share. Take photos with his family/friends and at different locations. Don’t just have selfies to submit. Good luck.

Thank you! He’s from Zimbabwe. 

[pushbrk 12,108]

1 hour ago, ilikepotatoes said:

Thank you so much...this makes me feel a lot better. Are pictures taken with an iPhone and then later printed out, okay? Or is there some other better way to document our time together? I also have logs from every message we’ve sent since we first spoke three years ago. Also, I actually had his name added to my mother’s obituary where they listed her surviving relatives and their spouses/fiancés. I saved that for evidence too. Our families are aware of our relationship. 

Yes, phone photos later printed are fine.  I recommend selecting 9 per page then print the page.  Something like 3 pages should be good.

[ilikepotatoes 37]

23 minutes ago, pushbrk said:

Yes, phone photos later printed are fine.  I recommend selecting 9 per page then print the page.  Something like 3 pages should be good.

Thank you! What about WhatsApp messages? Do I take screen shots of them? There’s also an option to export the chats, but then it’s downloaded into a different format. So I’m not sure how to present that. 

[pushbrk 12,108]

1 minute ago, ilikepotatoes said:

Thank you! What about WhatsApp messages? Do I take screen shots of them? There’s also an option to export the chats, but then it’s downloaded into a different format. So I’m not sure how to present that. 

Some examples of how and how often you communicate are good.  For WhatApp, I would do screen shots, but keep it to no more than a few printed pages.  Examples

 

[Timona 3,941]

Didn't you post about this last year? I remember a story about a BF from Zimbabwe studying medicine in Ukraine...

 

 

[SteveInBostonI130 3,319]

Hi.

 

Good news:  Kyiv is a relatively easy embassy for K1 and spouse visas for couples that have not had a long relationship.  Many K1s get approved after just one 2-3 week meeting.

 

Not so good news:  the above is true for Ukrainians.  I do not know how Kyiv treats students/visitors/temporary residents in UA from other countries.  If they treat him like any other applicant, your one visit should suffice.  If they treat him as the US embassy treats immigrant applicants from MENA countries, then you may need to show stronger relationship evidence.  

 

For the initial application (I-130), you should be fine.  But I strongly recommend that you visit him at least once more while you wait for the approval.   A few more times if you can handle it.  It's not USCIS you need to get past, it's the embassy interview.  The more visits and evidence you provide for an ongoing relationship by the time he interviews, the better.  You have a year or two to strengthen your relationship.

[ilikepotatoes 37]

20 minutes ago, SteveInBostonI130 said:

Hi.

 

Good news:  Kyiv is a relatively easy embassy for K1 and spouse visas for couples that have not had a long relationship.  Many K1s get approved after just one 2-3 week meeting.

 

Not so good news:  the above is true for Ukrainians.  I do not know how Kyiv treats students/visitors/temporary residents in UA from other countries.  If they treat him like any other applicant, your one visit should suffice.  If they treat him as the US embassy treats immigrant applicants from MENA countries, then you may need to show stronger relationship evidence.  

 

For the initial application (I-130), you should be fine.  But I strongly recommend that you visit him at least once more while you wait for the approval.   A few more times if you can handle it.  It's not USCIS you need to get past, it's the embassy interview.  The more visits and evidence you provide for an ongoing relationship by the time he interviews, the better.  You have a year or two to strengthen your relationship.

Thank you for your response! He’s actually graduating this year, and will be going back home at the end of summer. So we planned on applying through the embassy in Harare. 

[carmel34 3,531]

9 hours ago, ilikepotatoes said:

Thank you for your response! He’s actually graduating this year, and will be going back home at the end of summer. So we planned on applying through the embassy in Harare. 

Submitting the I-130 after a Zoom marriage on the first visit to see each other is a red flag, so is Zimbabwe.  To overcome this you will need lots of documentation, with the initial I-130 petition, then more evidence side-loaded at the NVC stage 6-8 months later (assuming I-130 is approved), then take more evidence to the visa interview which could be another 6-8 months after that.  I agree with others that you need more visits, time together in person, with original boarding passes, passport stamps, hotel receipts, and a few photos, to submit at all three stages of the spousal visa process.  But in addition, include things like WhatsApp conversations, email logs, Facebook relationship pages, Messenger conversations, phone call logs, video conversation records, to strengthen your case.  I would also suggest a few affidavits in your case, from family and friends who are aware of your relationship.  Add your fiancé to your US credit cards as an authorized user, to your US health insurance, dental and vision insurance, and as beneficiary on your life insurance and retirement and bank accounts.  Add him as your emergency contact at work, anything to document the relationship.  You can do all of these things while living in separate countries.  File your taxes a year from now as married jointly, with a W-7 to request his ITIN, do more research on how to do this.  Chances are high that even if the process goes smoothly, his visa interview will be more than a year from now in Harare so the timing should work out to file 2021 income taxes together before the interview so he can take that with him.  Do a will, living will, power of attorney after marriage and send that with the initial I-130.  Make arrangements for additional trips, as often as you can, to spend time together and side-load that evidence or take it to the interview.  If possible, it would help if you attended the interview with him when the time comes.  Look into financial sponsorship requirements and have a joint sponsor lined up if necessary for the visa interview.  Your situation could be challenging but is not impossible if you send lots of documents and make more trips to be together.  Good luck!

Edited March 28, 2021 by carmel34