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Hi I married a non us citizen, who overstayed his esta visa by 160 days. I never filed ANYTHING with uscis or an affidavit of support. He is now in his home country. (We don't have kids and he is not in the country)

 

Here's why I didn't apply for anything: he quickly became abusive physically and mentally as well as cheating (he also abused another woman he cheated on me with.) had a drug issue and was arrested or petty theft but the charges were dropped in the short amount of time we have been married. He was even fired from his (illegal) job for drinking too much and doing drugs on the job.

 

i want a divorce, he does not. Because he says if I divorce him I'm ruining his life so how about we apply for counselor of processing as friends...which I am obviously not going to do. But he's also threatening to just file for vawa. I'm scared he might be able to come back through this.

i don't know who to forward the information to with my domestic violence police reports and such.

 

has anyone been in my situation I don't know what to do. I asked him to stop contacting me so we can move on through divorce and he is cat fishing me through fake numbers and calling and texting non stop.

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Do you have a Divorce Lawyer?


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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**Moved from Tourist Visas to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits, where similar threads are discussed**


03639.png                  

 🇷🇺  CR-1 via DCF in Moscow* (2016-2017) 🇺🇸 Info about my DCF experience here and here.

Spoiler

26-Jul-2016: Married abroad (USC + Russian husband) 👩‍❤️‍👨
21-Dec-2016: I-130 filed at Moscow USCIS field office*
29-Dec-2016: I-130 approved! Yay! 🎊 

17-Jan-2017: Case number received

21-Mar-2017: Medical Exam completed

24-Mar-2017: Interview at Embassy - approved! 🎉

29-Mar-2017: CR-1 Visa received (via mail)

02-Apr-2017: USCIS Immigrant (GC) Fee paid

28-Jun-2017: Port of Entry @ PDX 🛩️

21-Jul-2017: No SSN after three weeks; applied in person at the SSA

22-Jul-2017: GC arrived in the mail 📬

31-Jul-2017: SSN arrived via mail, hurrah!

 

*NOTE: The USCIS Field Office in Moscow is now CLOSED.

 

I-90 GC Replacment (for Erroneous GC)

22-Jul-2017: GC arrives in the mail – error in middle name 😕

01-Aug-2017: Sent in I-90 online via website

05-Aug-2017: Biometrics scheduled

23-Aug-2017: Biometrics done @ USCIS office; told to keep GC!

16-Jul-2018: RFE for original card!! 🤬

31-Jul-2018: USCIS Appointment at local field office..

22-Aug-2018: Mailed GC back to USCIS in response to RFE

29-Aug-2018: GC received by USCIS

17-Sep-2018: Received CORRECTED GC in the mail! Finally!! 😂

 

📑 I-751 Removal of Conditions - NBC (Apr-2019-???) 📝 MSC I-751 filers: Track your case here!

Spoiler

28-Jun-2019: Conditional GC expires

30-Mar-2019: Eligible to apply for ROC

01-Apr-2019: ROC in the mail to Phoenix AZ lockbox! 📫

03-Apr-2019: ROC packet delivered to lockbox

09-Apr-2019: USCIS cashed check

09-Apr-2019: Case number received via text - MSC 📲

12-Apr-2019: Extension letter arrives via mail

19-Apr-2019: Biometrics letter arrives via mail

30-Apr-2019: Biometrics appointment at local office  

??-???-2019: TBA...

30-Mar-2020: N-400 early filing window opens! 🇺🇸

 

 

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7 minutes ago, nastra30 said:

You are not using a lawyer for your divorce? If not get one ASAP.  This is not a situation you should use DIY.

I can not afford one at the moment. 

8 minutes ago, nastra30 said:

You are not using a lawyer for your divorce? If not get one ASAP.  This is not a situation you should use DIY.

I cannot afford one, I have no income. 

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Change your phone number, save up for a Lawyer.


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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2 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Change your phone number, save up for a Lawyer.

Is a normal divorce not an option? We have no assets or children. I was told by uscis that because he’s back in his home country, we don’t have kids or assets, he’s not in any immediate danger he’s working and living with his family, he has police reports filed against him and has an arrest on file. 

 

So they said the likelihood of him being able to come back through vawa he would hear back in 9 years or be denied because he has no reason to be in America aside from me. And he’s already violated his esta by getting married, overstayed and is back home. So he wouldn’t look good because he got married got in trouble while he overstayed...

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9 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Change your phone number, save up for a Lawyer.

I’m just scared of how he’s going to react when he gets divorce papers or a restraining order. He’s harassing me from overseas, found my new number and address. Idk. 

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5 minutes ago, Justinehobarten said:

I’m just scared of how he’s going to react when he gets divorce papers or a restraining order. He’s harassing me from overseas, found my new number and address. Idk. 

Block him on all social media and you can also block phone numbers 

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24 minutes ago, Justinehobarten said:

I can not afford one at the moment. 

I cannot afford one, I have no income. 

You don't have family members who can help you through this by helping you get a lawyer. I still recommend a lawyer for your situation. Just my 2 cents. All the best.

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Sounds like somebody you are giving you new contact details to is passing them on.

 

Not sure what you mean by normal divorce, but if you feel comfortable going that rout on a diy basis that would be an option.


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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18 minutes ago, Justinehobarten said:

Is a normal divorce not an option?

Unfortunately it is not an option because this is far beyond a normal marriage situation. Non-compliant abusive spouse who refuses to agree to divorce and is a foreign national living abroad, and to make matters worse, who worked illegally and overstayed his visa in the US. Definitely not DIY territory I am afraid.

 

In my state, there are legal services and individual lawyers who offer a sliding scale fee for low income folks. You should research to see if there might be something similar in your area.

Edited by millefleur

03639.png                  

 🇷🇺  CR-1 via DCF in Moscow* (2016-2017) 🇺🇸 Info about my DCF experience here and here.

Spoiler

26-Jul-2016: Married abroad (USC + Russian husband) 👩‍❤️‍👨
21-Dec-2016: I-130 filed at Moscow USCIS field office*
29-Dec-2016: I-130 approved! Yay! 🎊 

17-Jan-2017: Case number received

21-Mar-2017: Medical Exam completed

24-Mar-2017: Interview at Embassy - approved! 🎉

29-Mar-2017: CR-1 Visa received (via mail)

02-Apr-2017: USCIS Immigrant (GC) Fee paid

28-Jun-2017: Port of Entry @ PDX 🛩️

21-Jul-2017: No SSN after three weeks; applied in person at the SSA

22-Jul-2017: GC arrived in the mail 📬

31-Jul-2017: SSN arrived via mail, hurrah!

 

*NOTE: The USCIS Field Office in Moscow is now CLOSED.

 

I-90 GC Replacment (for Erroneous GC)

22-Jul-2017: GC arrives in the mail – error in middle name 😕

01-Aug-2017: Sent in I-90 online via website

05-Aug-2017: Biometrics scheduled

23-Aug-2017: Biometrics done @ USCIS office; told to keep GC!

16-Jul-2018: RFE for original card!! 🤬

31-Jul-2018: USCIS Appointment at local field office..

22-Aug-2018: Mailed GC back to USCIS in response to RFE

29-Aug-2018: GC received by USCIS

17-Sep-2018: Received CORRECTED GC in the mail! Finally!! 😂

 

📑 I-751 Removal of Conditions - NBC (Apr-2019-???) 📝 MSC I-751 filers: Track your case here!

Spoiler

28-Jun-2019: Conditional GC expires

30-Mar-2019: Eligible to apply for ROC

01-Apr-2019: ROC in the mail to Phoenix AZ lockbox! 📫

03-Apr-2019: ROC packet delivered to lockbox

09-Apr-2019: USCIS cashed check

09-Apr-2019: Case number received via text - MSC 📲

12-Apr-2019: Extension letter arrives via mail

19-Apr-2019: Biometrics letter arrives via mail

30-Apr-2019: Biometrics appointment at local office  

??-???-2019: TBA...

30-Mar-2020: N-400 early filing window opens! 🇺🇸

 

 

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44 minutes ago, millefleur said:

Unfortunately it is not an option because this is far beyond a normal marriage situation. Non-compliant abusive spouse who refuses to agree to divorce and is a foreign national living abroad, and to make matters worse, who worked illegally and overstayed his visa in the US. Definitely not DIY territory I am afraid.

 

In my state, there are legal services and individual lawyers who offer a sliding scale fee for low income folks. You should research to see if there might be something similar in your area.

I was just thinking dissolution of marriage was an option because it only needs to take one spouse to not be In it. 

 

 It idk how I benefit from attaching criminal charges against him because it’s just going to drag it out and he knows I don’t have the money to fight things in court. We have the domestic violence legal clinic here but I just get anxiety thinking about telling another person my boo hoo story of being taken advantage of, being made small and to feel scared. 

 

I’m not currently employed because my job was seasonal. But he is grasping at straws. So I’m assuming my best bet is to file criminal charges against him? Idk

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