Help with possible divorce!!!

[ali.cha 18]

Hi everyone,

I am desperate and i need specific answers to my questions. I feel my marriage is getting over and I don't know where to start. My husband works on east and west coast, most time he spends in NYC now. Staying away from me long time he stops talking to me and seems gives him time to figure out how to get rid of me. We've got through a lot, including lots of fight and it might have affected our relationship. Soon he will be back and i want him to send application to divorce. A little about me: I live in a very small town, failed driving test lately and i am unemployed, obviously that's the reason he think i am sort of nuisance for him. I'm tired living like that, I am very stressed and I don't know what expect next from him. So tell me, if he applies to court to divorce us what right do i have? I came to the US by CR1 visa and if we're divorced I won't be able to support myself first, because finding job will take time. Or maybe you could advise me where I could call/write to get a help like free lawyer who defends immigrant's rights or safe shelter to start my new life. Please give me advice. Thank you

[TBoneTX 45,498]

*** Thread is moved from Off Topic forum to the Effects of Major Changes forum, where similar topics are found. ***

[Transborderwife 4,666]

Sorry but likely none. If the matrimonial home is owned jointly you may have some hope. Have you looked into a homeless shelter? If he's away often why are you concerned about your home? Would he let you stay until you can get on your feet? What about counselling? He doesn't have to file, you can yourself

[flfreddy 92]

If you need green card, check out whether VAWA applies to you... if you already have green card, you can use I864 to sue for 125% support. See your I864 terms and conditions.

[Transborderwife 4,666]

If you need green card, check out whether VAWA applies to you... if you already have green card, you can use I864 to sue for 125% support. See your I864 terms and conditions.

Op came in on a cr1. Would have a greencard. Where was any abuse mentioned? The I-864 is not for that purpose

Edited January 26, 2016 by Transborderwife

[flfreddy 92]

The I864 has been used in multiple cases for suing on spousal support. See Stump vs Stump. Also there were california cases where the divorced beneficiary sued the ex husband. You can just google I864 affidavit of support after divorce. NOTE: Divorce does not end I864 obligations of sponsor. There is a line in I864 that states "Beneficiary may sue the petitioner"

I may have misread the "stress and nuisance" and "safe shelter part" mentioned, withdraw comment on VAWA and removal of conditional CR1.

I864 comment stays as that is advised by my attorney and hence we had to prep the prenup even for K-1 in preparation for the CR1, in case I864 ever becomes an issue in years to come.

Edited January 26, 2016 by flfreddy

[Transborderwife 4,666]

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/440157-divorcenow-what-happens-confusedsad/

Interesting thread on the subject for reference

[Ortolan 381]

Your message sounds like you've already given up on this marriage. Sounds like time for a calm discussion with your husband about what you both want the future to be, together or separately.

Perhaps you might start now getting some skills so you'll be able to get some sort of job. You can always re-take your driver's test.

[ali.cha 18]

i was not abused in marriage just multiple fight with emotional pressure. We have literally nothing! We rented apartments, he was a car financed all bills were paid by him. I thought he signed papers before he sent application for CR1 committing to support me. Taking into account i am unemployed i was hoping to get some support until i settle down. He said we don't have anything to split and he doesn't owe me anything

[Chris and ZhiJia 146]

i was not abused in marriage just multiple fight with emotional pressure. We have literally nothing! We rented apartments, he was a car financed all bills were paid by him. I thought he signed papers before he sent application for CR1 committing to support me. Taking into account i am unemployed i was hoping to get some support until i settle down. He said we don't have anything to split and he doesn't owe me anything

Yes and No, the papers he signed were more of a promise to the government that you would not receive means tested benefits (Government support). However they do not exclude you from receiving them, and if you do receive them, while the I-864 is still valid he is obligated to reimburse the government.

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

I don't know if you are done with ROC but as far as moving on goes, take the driver's test again and find work to support yourself, you have been

here for 2 1/2 years so it's time to do something with any job you can get even if it's not your ideal job. Suing your spouse is ridiculous, go find a job

and a divorce lawyer.

Divorce and you can file ROC with a divorce waiver.

[Adil & Jeanne 296]

You are in California

very favorable to the wife

California is a community property state

Community property also includes all the earnings that either spouse or partner (or both of you) earned during the marriage and everything bought with those earnings. You can usually tell if property belongs to the community by looking at the source of the money that was used to buy it. If the purchase money was earned during the marriage, the property belongs to the community.

look up on internet for more informaiton

but don't believe him when he says you don't get anything

when you come in complete earnest of living and loving in a good marriage, and it falls apart, you are still entitled to half of what he has gotten since you married (even for the time you waited for visa in your country)

he may even have to pay your lawyer / see one as first meeting may be free

also maybe the best way to solve this is for him to agree to help you in classes so you can later care for yourself

sorry for your troubles and sorry for his

[jam2016 10]

VAWA should not be used if it does not concern you. Work on the basics why you two fought a lot and see if you both can save the marriage.

Suing your hubby is an option if based on the Genuine ground but then a lot has abused the system because the law favors the female and put the blame on their other half.

A sensible thing to do is try to obtain a DL, a job to pay for the bill and share your income when you can. Or try to live on your own feet and file for a Divorce.

[ali.cha 18]

You are in California

very favorable to the wife

California is a community property state

Community property also includes all the earnings that either spouse or partner (or both of you) earned during the marriage and everything bought with those earnings. You can usually tell if property belongs to the community by looking at the source of the money that was used to buy it. If the purchase money was earned during the marriage, the property belongs to the community.

look up on internet for more informaiton

but don't believe him when he says you don't get anything

when you come in complete earnest of living and loving in a good marriage, and it falls apart, you are still entitled to half of what he has gotten since you married (even for the time you waited for visa in your country)

he may even have to pay your lawyer / see one as first meeting may be free

also maybe the best way to solve this is for him to agree to help you in classes so you can later care for yourself

sorry for your troubles and sorry for his

Thank you for your full answer. I didn't mention that we didn't buy anything together but a car that was financed by bank. We rented apartments in Connecticut and California, the current location is Lodi, Ca is a very small town where leasing is getting over by march. My husband work in insurance and he makes commission, hence he has no based income like salary. Most people advise me to get a license and find a job, which is not easy small town has not much to offer in employment market. I would like to come back to San Diego if we divorce and start my life down there, but he says divorce process takes a short time and once papers signed we don't commit anymore.

[jam2016 10]

OP, it's not true that you are not entitled to anything and divorcing is just signing off the paper. At a minimum, your husband is responsible for you till you can stand on your own feet. There is no prenuptial agreement between you two, right?

You need to consult (in person or a phone call) with an attorney practicing family law or at a minimum a paralegal with experience in family law. A

Don't SIGN any divorce paper till you have talked to a lawyer / attorney / paralegal!

Edited January 27, 2016 by jam2016