Attitudes of Posters

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Unless being a USC automatically means one has superlative English language skills or special form-filling talents, your point is moot. Maybe I should mock your use of irrelevant punctuation marks to prove my point?

I'm not knocking anyone who needs help--but I'm tired of being told indirectly that my husband doesn't care enough or isn't invested in the process -- otherwise he'd be here asking the questions.

I've found some USC's who's grasp of English isn't the best and who have been mistaken for the foreign beneficiary as well... just out of interest.

I personally am the "foreign one" but obviously from an English speaking country. I haven't ever taken the "why isn't the USC here?" personally, at all, at any stage because I do realise that they're often referring to the fact the qn either indicates they don't speak/understand English well, or the post tends to make little to no sense.

Oh, also, I am the one that does the paperwork for this. My husband is involved to a point. He knows roughly what's going on. He knows how serious the I-864 is, he came to my medical appointment, and intends to come to my biometrics (even though I told him he's not needed) but paperwork is a big part of my line of work so I'm used to it and I prefer being in control of it. I have my folder of info. He knows where the info is if he wants it, but he knows I have it all under control. And you know.. I think it shows a lot of trust in the relationship if the foreigner is the one doing the paperwork. I think it shows that he knows you wouldn't do anything "wrong" or "dodgy". I'm not saying that anyone who gets more help is less trusted, but I just don't see the foreigner doing it as a bad thing. I ONLY see it as a bad thing if the person (USC or foreigner) doesn't speak English well.. it's then that I think they need a lawyer, or an English speaking friend to help them out because it doesn't matter how many questions they ask, I'm always worried there's one or two very important questions they haven't asked because they think they understand it and in reality they're very very wrong.

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Whichever one of the couple is the best at paperwork should be doing the paperwork?

Edited March 22, 2010 by JohnnyQuest

[trailmix 77]

Sure it's a free board and sure it can be annoying to repeat the answers to the same questions over and over again - everyone knows that.

Basically, if we didn't have people joining this forum and asking those questions - VJ would be a pretty slow board. Of course we could all sit around and write concise guides and flow charts and 98% of the questions could be answered with them and we could just provide traffic direction - fun.

This board gains new members when they sign up and maybe ask an old question or two, they start to get a feel for it, from those that choose to help them and then many go on to become really helpful members.

One of my first questions here, perhaps even my first, was about the I-864. I got a reply from Pushbrk, he told me to read the instructions - which I did. Great piece of advice, really rude approach to a very new poster. Sure i've mentioned it to him, and the handful of other rude people on this board, i've seen others do it too - makes zero difference - but I don't care anymore.

I had an email this morning from someone who has been on VJ quite a while - great poster, great advice, always kind and welcoming to new people. She has decided not to post here anymore - had enough of the rude people who wander in to the Canada forum just trying to cause trouble, can't say I blame her.

She also has many years of experience in one of the specialty areas that are covered on VJ - now that experience has been lost to this board. It's too bad.

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

I had an email this morning from someone who has been on VJ quite a while - great poster, great advice, always kind and welcoming to new people. She has decided not to post here anymore - had enough of the rude people who wander in to the Canada forum just trying to cause trouble, can't say I blame her.

She also has many years of experience in one of the specialty areas that are covered on VJ - now that experience has been lost to this board. It's too bad.

Well sadly enough, she's not the first and won't be the last.

[Scott and Mhay 57]

I remember a post I made when i first joined trying to help...I did give correct advice...talk to a travel agent...but I was blown up and picked on. I almost left the forum but I did contact a mod and they convinced me to stay.

the same stuff happens on all types of forums. I am an admin on a diesel forum and we deal with trolls that just want to cause problems. We answer the same questions over and over again. sometimes i just read and shake my head. I know I see the same type of stuff here too. We all have a choice whether to reply or not...I know sometimes I type a reply and never post. It feels good sometimes tp just put your thoughts down.

If a reply is that harsh, it can be reported for review by the staff.

[I'm Gone 60]

i've seen those posts you speak of, and they were quite harsh and unnecessary.

Charles, before you became one of them did you get suspended for anything you posted?

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I was one of those old-timers who left -- I spent six months away from VJ because I was so fed up with the level of invective, vitriol and condescension being thrown about in the upper forums. I don't really know why I came back, but back I am. In general, I try to be minimally polite when I say "read the guides, f*cktard." You'll find most of my posts are helpful and welcoming as much as possible.* I don't get my rocks off by assuming that by belittling people is going to make me VJ Royalty. (Hell, I'm hardly even near the gates of the palace. I'm too busy in the pub.) I too don't agree with spoonfeeding, but if one person says "start with the guides," why should I pile on and repeat it?

I don't know, it's SUCH an old refrain that VJ ain't what it used to be, that no one thinks for themselves anymore, etc etc ad infinitum ad nauseam. But really? The level of bare-faced aggression in response to ignorance is staggering.

(*I will except the vibrator sh*tstorm of 2009, but how could anyone resist that one?)

**Edited to insert a missing parenthesis.

Edited March 23, 2010 by elmcitymaven

[I'm Gone 60]

He should be banned. I've been on this site a very long time and no longer help in the upper forums as I've more or less forgotten most of what I used to know, but I did help once upon a time and I did get help once upon a time. No one in my memory was ever that rude. That level of condescension should simply not be acceptable no matter how smart one is perceived to be.

We should all be as nice as you. I found this nugget of yours from today.

"Dumbass, that's why we voted for him. In fact, this isn't socialist enough. He screwed us too but we'll take it. There will be opportunity to socialize it even more "

[TBoneTX 47,923]

I dont consider myself a manchild when I report someone for a TOS baiting post or a personal attack on me.

Oh, si man -- TOS violations, baiting, & personal attacks are definitely report-worthy, & I've reported some myself. It's the "that advice is so straightforward that it hurts my (or someone else's) widdle feelings" that I object to, si man.

Point: Despite pushbrk's reputation (deserved or not) for harshness, has anyone noticed the changed tone as of the new year? Take a look for a while, starting with existing posts & continuing with new ones.

Point: The most toxic VJ member that I can think of during my time here, RebeccaJo, is no longer. Thanks be for that, si man.

[Ban Hammer 14,469]

Charles, before you became one of them did you get suspended for anything you posted?

let's just say i know the tos from a real personal perspective.

[Mags 112]

Point: The most toxic VJ member that I can think of during my time here, RebeccaJo, is no longer.

I'll have you know that Rebeccajo had a 99.9% accuracy rating.

[Usui Takumi 1,562]

I'll have you know that Rebeccajo had a 99.9% accuracy rating.

Toxicity and accuracy percentage are different matters entirely. For instance, an allogeneic stem cell transplant has a high rate of success if the patient actually survives, if you catch my drift.

[besaangel 18]

Toxicity and accuracy percentage are different matters entirely. For instance, an allogeneic stem cell transplant has a high rate of success if the patient actually survives, if you catch my drift.

Very good analogy- its not always what you do but HOW you go about doing it...

[Ban Hammer 14,469]

Point: The most toxic VJ member that I can think of during my time here, RebeccaJo, is no longer. Thanks be for that, si man.

i disagree. you never met platy's nemesis.

[*julez* 124]

i disagree. you never met platy's nemesis.

Still can't let it go, eh, Charles!?