Unhelpful responses in forums

[ak5285 20]

This website has been very helpful for alot of things. What has not been helpful, though, is the attitude of some of the people on here. So many responses I've seen are rude, condescending, and generally crappy/unhelpful. I'm not sure why you would go on this website if you're easily irritated by innocent questions, but the forums seem to be full of these types of people. It's getting frustrating coming on here to ask a simple question only to be met with negativity. Some folks do answer like a normal person, but for every kind response I get 2 rude ones. And they don't even answer the question! They just give a snippy critique on one thing you said while ignoring the rest of the post. It's just unnecessary.

 

On this website I've been told to chill out. I've been told that I'm overthinking and complicating a simple task (because immigration is known for being simple). I've had someone ignore my question and tell me I should've chosen a different visa if I didn't want the problems we're having (as if that's helpful 2 years in). And just generally have received many responses that ignore my actual post and imply that my questions are dumb, ridiculous, or beneath them. Are my posts laced with anxiety? Probably. Many of the posts on here are. I assumed that others would understand this having also been through immigration, but apparently not. If you can't handle people having different approaches, emotions, or knowledge than you do, then you really have no business coming on here to "answer" questions.

 

I don't know if people are bitter because the immigration process has run them ragged, but it's no excuse. We've all been through it and owe it to each other to be respectful. It's a difficult and vulnerable thing to go through. The least you can do is a) show some empathy, or b) if that's not your thing, just answer the question without putting a condescending spin on it to make yourself feel superior or whatever. If you find a question ridiculous or don't like how it's being asked, just don't answer. And definitely don't go out of your way to answer with some snarky opinion that nobody asked for. It's really not difficult.

 

I know that tone is easily lost over text, but this has happened enough that I'm certain I'm not imagining it. There are other websites, I know, but I've found this one to be the most thorough and informative. Yet every time I come on here to ask something, I dread having to read these types of responses. I'm sure nothing will come of this, but I just wanted to put this out there in case others have experienced this too.  

[David & Diana R 1,005]

 

24 minutes ago, David & Diana R said:

 

I agree with you 100%.   A few on here only know how to be condescending and mean spirited.  Yes, there are even trolls here, sad to say.  I find the best way is to just ignore them and at the same time report them to the moderators.  Generally, if a post is not relevant or helpful they will remove the post for you.  I have been treated terribly at times and I assure you this is not your imagination.  Good luck my friend.

Aloha from Hawaii, David

Edited June 18, 2021 by David & Diana R

[ak5285 20]

10 hours ago, David & Diana R said:

 

I agree with you 100%.   A few on here only know how to be condescending and mean spirited.  Yes, there are even trolls here, sad to say.  I find the best way is to just ignore them and at the same time report them to the moderators.  Generally, if a post is not relevant or helpful they will remove the post for you.  I have been treated terribly at times and I assure you this is not your imagination.  Good luck my friend.

Aloha from Hawaii, David

Thank you for the understanding and validation. It happened again to me today, and I'm frankly quite sick of it. There is no tolerance on here for people not knowing the answers to things or understanding things the first time. Which is insane because this entire website is based on asking questions and clarifying next steps. You ask a question, you get told that your question is stupid. You respond, you get your head bitten off. You ask a follow up question to clarify things, you get accused of accusing others of 'talking out of their ---'. It's absolutely ridiculous. The impatience and judgmental tone behind people's "suggestions" just blows my mind. To come on here and talk down to people and tell them their feelings/questions aren't valid is just gross and unnecessary. I almost feel sorry for those people if that's the only way they can feel good about themselves, but it's not worth the energy.

[David & Diana R 1,005]

7 minutes ago, ak5285 said:

Thank you for the understanding and validation. It happened again to me today, and I'm frankly quite sick of it. There is no tolerance on here for people not knowing the answers to things or understanding things the first time. Which is insane because this entire website is based on asking questions and clarifying next steps. You ask a question, you get told that your question is stupid. You respond, you get your head bitten off. You ask a follow up question to clarify things, you get accused of accusing others of 'talking out of their ---'. It's absolutely ridiculous. The impatience and judgmental tone behind people's "suggestions" just blows my mind. To come on here and talk down to people and tell them their feelings/questions aren't valid is just gross and unnecessary. I almost feel sorry for those people if that's the only way they can feel good about themselves, but it's not worth the energy.

Yes, just ignore them and report them to the mods.  The established TOS dos not allow for demeaning others or posts that do not help anyone.  You're right, don't waste your time.  These trolls are not worth the effort.

Aloha, David 

[kkmk 47]

i saw your post and the very pathetic little people with their silly unhelpful condescending and a waste of pixels in my screen responses. they don't seem to realise that they're making a fool of themselves and it's just sad. good thing is that there are so many wonderful helpful people here that will definitely contribute positively to whatever we ask, in spite of these miserable trolls.

[TBoneTX 43,058]

If you think that a post violates the site's Terms of Service,

https://www.visajourney.com/terms-of-service/

report it to the Moderation team along with your reasoning.

[Captain Ewok 1,857]

Well, from the top-down... I am sorry.  This is not cool.  We were founded on HELPFULNESS.  This past year has been pretty stressful for all of us -- but that's not excuse.  PM me directly or msg a mod and we will def try to jump in and re-steer attitudes.  Everyone is welcome.  New members especially... after all -- we were all NEW members in this immigration journey (my family included!).

[shaung 4]

I reported an issue on July 15, 2021.  It is now July 20, 2021.  Absolutely no response from Admin.

 

I called someone out because of their continued snarky responses.  They jumped at me again along with all of his buddies on this site.

Edited July 20, 2021 by shaung

[Captain Ewok 1,857]

Can you post a link to the post?

[shaung 4]

Captain Ewok. Look at the thread Applicant Income started by me.  Lots of accusations were made without any knowledge.  The gang up on  me is inexcusable.  I also asked that they whole thread be removed about 10 days ago because I put some info on it I'd rather not be there but nothing has been done and there has been no response to it.  I no longer have any trust in anyone on this site.

[Ed&Midori1031 330]

On 6/17/2021 at 7:56 PM, ak5285 said:

 

Glad you voiced your opiniong about this, I know the feeling!  I remember when I first started on VJ, I've had my fair share of unhelpful responses, and even rudeness.  Like any other social media platform, people think they can just say what they want since they got a screen between them and the other person.  

 

 

[Nature Boy 2.0 8,315]

On 7/27/2021 at 7:22 AM, Ed&Midori1031 said:

Glad you voiced your opiniong about this, I know the feeling!  I remember when I first started on VJ, I've had my fair share of unhelpful responses, and even rudeness.  Like any other social media platform, people think they can just say what they want since they got a screen between them and the other person.  

 

 

#Me too