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jose_leti

balancing money after married

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withdraw all of the cash . put it on the table.

then go over the accounting book.

the money you brought into the usa? give half to your uscitizen spouse. keep the other half.

the uscitizen spouse's salary? get half, put in your pile.

now study what's left, and make yer budget with yer uscitizen spouse.


Sometimes my language usage seems confusing - please feel free to 'read it twice', just in case !
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You should not spend more than you earn ... If you both can agree on that then you have a good foundation to go off of.


Sent I-129 Application to VSC 2/1/12
NOA1 2/8/12
RFE 8/2/12
RFE reply 8/3/12
NOA2 8/16/12
NVC received 8/27/12
NVC left 8/29/12
Manila Embassy received 9/5/12
Visa appointment & approval 9/7/12
Arrived in US 10/5/2012
Married 11/24/2012
AOS application sent 12/19/12

AOS approved 8/24/13

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You should not spend more than you earn ... If you both can agree on that then you have a good foundation to go off of.

i agree.. we are balancing now. i share the balancing wiht my wife. we set the rent money aside, food money aside and if we have any left we will go out to eat. we are married with 2 kids and going over budget is not an option.

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The first week after my husband's paycheck is deposited, the rent and other bills are withdrawn automatically. Then we take a look at what we have left over and decide how it will be spent (usually groceries and other boring but necessary things).


3/2/18  E-filed N-400 under 5 year rule

3/26/18 Biometrics

7/2019-12/2019 (Yes, 16- 21 months) Estimated time to interview MSP office.

 

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I have a hanging calendar and each of our bill due dates is listed on the calendar. I also list my husband's pay days (mine are weekly so no need to list). I don't personally list the amounts because of where the calendar is located but I would do that if it was in a more private location. It helps me see what bills are due when and in relation to which pay period. The way our bills are laid out we usually have 2 due per pay period.

Tony get paid every 2 weeks. So we log into his account on his pay day and automatically transfer half of the mortgage due amount into another account dedicated to mortgage payments (we could automate this and we used to but for some bizarre reason it would lock up his account on midnight on the day it was meant to transfer. Strange.).

Then based on the remaining money we pay either JUST the bills due in this 2 week period, or also a bill from the next period.

My income is similar to Tony's but I only work part-time. My income goes to paying for groceries also for sending money to savings. I will help out with a bill here or there as well depending how the bills fall.

We have a credit card now as well so when insurance was due this last month we put that on the credit card and I have 6 weeks to pay it off (which is easy enough with my income). This also helps with the revolving credit thing I need to build my credit score.

It works out well to put a bill on the credit card if it doesn't coincide with a pay period and then pay it off when it's pay day. That way bills aren't late and the credit card is paid off.

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In addition to setting aside rent and pills immediately (some banks will let you set up a separate bill pay account with few/no fees to manage this), making lists helps me.

Sit down with your spouse and look at how much you both make/have to spend and make a list of all the things you think you will spend it on- rent, bills, food, transport, car maintenance, kid maintenance, pet maintenance, savings, treats etc. Divide how much you can afford to spend between the categories. Then keep your receipts (put an envelope on the fridge if you tend to lose them like I do) and set aside a few hours a month (or a week, if you need tighter management) to go over expenditures and see where the money is really going. If you find one area is surprisingly pricey or one partner is doing most of the spending, break that down and figure out why it is.

Make a grocery list and then bring paper and pencil with you when you shop,or look over your receipts after. Ask yourself: Are you buying things on impulse when you go to the store? What are the prices of generic brands? What's the minimum you could live comfortably on per week? What can't you/your fam live without and how much is it costing you?

Keep track of when you fill your gas tank and mileage for individual trips for a few weeks. Are you making unnecessary trips when you could consolidate your travel, find a quicker route, walk or stay home?

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Take the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace Univeristy class together. It takes a couple of months and requires you to actually tackle problems and come up with solutions TOGETHER so you are learning to work as a team with experienced guidance.

It takes some time to go through it so it is like a weekly date night.

When I took it (during the wait for the K-1 process), I discussed each class with my then-fiance and the problems so that he was part of the decision making and solution finding. In the first 2 weeks, I (we) had the 1000$ emergency fund fully ready for an emergency. When it came time to pay for each immigration-related cost, they were easily dealt with because of the tools that taught us HOW to prepare in advance and because of the requirement to keep the 1000$ set aside for when you are hit unexpectedly.

I have never done well financially--not because of lack of employment but because of lack of money managing skills--something that really needs to be learned and practiced.

Now, we are planning paying out of pocket the 4200$ for our midwife fees, planning a trip to the other side of the US for the summer, trying to time a mini-pre-baby-honeymoon, and living normal lower-stressed lives.

When I was in the class, the emergency funds were used by about 25% of the class DURING the time that we were taking the class together. It really hit home how helpful that was--if you do nothing else, that alone will reduce the stress in your life so much to not worry about the little small worries that accompany money mismanagement and avoid the petty disagreements that spring up from that.

Because you have to work as a team together and learn to be fair with your money both to your partner AND to yourself (something I have a problem with), it resolves the most commonly cited reason for divorce in this country. It is the best gift you can give your spouse/fiance.

Edited to note:

When I started the class, I made 42,000U$/year pretax. I actually take home a little over half of that--about 2200/month. THIS is where the money comes from for everything. The rest is almost never seen (taxes, SS, retirement, insurance, insurance, insurance, insurance, etc).

Edited by EminTX

Perú's K-1 embassy packet can be viewed in our photos.
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Attention NEW K-1 Filers: (2012) Possible 1st year costs = Possibly 3K+$ for first year including fees for mailing, documents, supplies, etc.. NOT including travel costs. Process: 1.)Apply-340$ 2.)RFE? 3.) Med-300??$ 4.)Interview-350$ 5.)Surrender passport. 6.)Get Visa. 7.)Fly here. 8.) Marry in 90 days. 9.) Submit apps to stay, work, & travel-1070$ 10.) Biometrics-More fingerprinting 11.) GREENCARD ISSUED APR 9TH, 2013-11 MONTHS FOR AOS!
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@EminTX I thought everyone had a rainy day fund! I think $1000 is a little on the light side and our income is less than that. I think about it needing to be enough to cover return airfare for the three of us and a big car repair and groceries for 6 months. My late dad was a financial planner and his advice and sort of standard is to have 6 months to a year of mortgage/rent and utilities payments saved up in case you lose your job and unemployment isn't enough, etc.

We also have an expense/college fund for the little one and many of her birthday gifts go towards the fund.


3/2/18  E-filed N-400 under 5 year rule

3/26/18 Biometrics

7/2019-12/2019 (Yes, 16- 21 months) Estimated time to interview MSP office.

 

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@EminTX I thought everyone had a rainy day fund! I think $1000 is a little on the light side and our income is less than that. I think about it needing to be enough to cover return airfare for the three of us and a big car repair and groceries for 6 months. My late dad was a financial planner and his advice and sort of standard is to have 6 months to a year of mortgage/rent and utilities payments saved up in case you lose your job and unemployment isn't enough, etc.

We also have an expense/college fund for the little one and many of her birthday gifts go towards the fund.

No, not everyone can afford a "rainy day" fund, especially when the rainy day fund was depleted by a rainy 3 months. Takes some time to get back on your feet after that!

Everyone has their own way of managing money. There is no "right" way to do it. Things are getting better for us and eventually maybe one day we'll be money-stress free but for right now we pay our bills, and are able to buy special thing on occasion (new bed, new computer, second-hand SUV). Life is looking good :)

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Everyone has their own way of managing money. There is no "right" way to do it.
There is only one system.

1. The esposo earns the money, si man; and

2. The esposa spends it, sigh man.


06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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There is only one system.

1. The esposo earns the money, si man; and

2. The esposa spends it, sigh man.

Hehehe


We became a couple : 2011-05-29
I visited him : 2011-10-28 - 2011-11-17
He visited me (and my crazy family) : 2012-02-05 - 2012-02-17
I-129F Sent : 2012-02-05
I-129F NOA1 : 2012-02-14
I entered on VWP to stay 3 months: 2012-04-11 - 2012-07-03
---
Went to get my medical done for interview in Australia (much cheaper in the US and I was already here):2012-05-20
Medical issue diagnosed
K-1 petition cancellation request sent to CSC : 2012-06-01
Married: 2012-06-21
Filed for AOS : 2012-08-08
NOA1 : 2012-08-10
Biometrics : 2012-09-14
EAD approved : 2012-10-16
Applied for SSN : 2012-11-01
Received SSN : 2012-11-13
Received interview notice :2012-12-27
Interview- APPROVED :2013-01-28
Green card received :2013-02-04
Baby girl born :2013-03-09

Filed for ROC :2014-12-05
NOA :2014-12-11
Biometrics : 2015-01-15

ROC Approval : 2015-05-14

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Easy tip: Spend exactly as much as you earn.

Unless you want to save. Then you spend on saving category. Once again, you spend exactly as much as you earn.


N400 CITIZENSHIP STAGE

23-DEC-2016 -:- N400 form mailed to Dallas, TX Lockbox (USPS EXPRESS)

27-DEC-2016 -:- N400 form delivered/picked up by USCIS

01-JAN-2017 -:- N400 form fee check cashed by USCIS

04-JAN-2017 -:- N400 form received per NOA1

09-JAN-2017 -:- N400 form NOA1 notice date

14-JAN-2017 -:- N400 form NOA1 on hand through USPS

30-JAN-2017 -:- N400 fingerprint taken

01-FEB-2017 -:- N400 interview schedule process started

26-JUL-2017 -:- N400 interview date set (01SEP2017)

29-JUL-2017 -:- N400 interview letter on hand

01-SEP-2017 -:- N400 interview date - Interview passed

10-OCT-2017-:- N400 oath ceremony letter on hand (oath on 26OCT2017)

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