She spent my AOS application money ! Im so furious ..please help me calm down .

[Freedove7 17]

Please give me your input .A relative of mine,out of the goodness of his heart,gave me $1300 towards my immigration application fee.He had given it to my mother and told her to give it to me.Since he told me when he gave it to her,I asked her about it and she lied and said I must have misunderstood.She had he nerve to tel me he didnt give it to her.A whole month passed and I still didnt get any money from her.So I called my uncle and asked him about it.He said he gave her the money and couldnt believe she didnt give it to me.She finally admitted it but still lied.She claimed he only gave $1000...Sooo not true.My uncle put us on three way and asked her how much he gave her..she admitted that he gave $1300.My uncle was so upset.She told me she would give it back to me but I had to wait about 4 weeks.I said fine...Its now been almost 2 months since my uncle gave me the money and she still has not returned it.She even had the gull to buy her friend a dress this week for her birthday ! I mean really ?? This is what got me even more angrier.She's the one that put me in this situation first of all.She did not do what she was suppose to do before she decided to bring me to the US when I was a kid.I spent almost my whole life living in limitation because of my immigration status./Now that I can finally solve this problem and live a normal life,she turns around does this to me.Now I have to wait to send out my application..This was very very selfish of her.I dont think I could ever forgive her or have a normal relationship with her.We weren't on good terms for about 2 years now.Things just got worse! Im done with her !

[NancyNguyen 1,657]

Well this is family issue, pity for you but please post it in appropriate section. Hope you will solve the problem. Good luck.

[Hank_ 9,173]

Please give me your input .A relative of mine,out of the goodness of his heart,gave me $1300 towards my immigration application fee.He had given it to my mother and told her to give it to me.Since he told me when he gave it to her,I asked her about it and she lied and said I must have misunderstood.She had he nerve to tel me he didnt give it to her.A whole month passed and I still didnt get any money from her.So I called my uncle and asked him about it.He said he gave her the money and couldnt believe she didnt give it to me.She finally admitted it but still lied.She claimed he only gave $1000...Sooo not true.My uncle put us on three way and asked her how much he gave her..she admitted that he gave $1300.My uncle was so upset.She told me she would give it back to me but I had to wait about 4 weeks.I said fine...Its now been almost 2 months since my uncle gave me the money and she still has not returned it.She even had the gull to buy her friend a dress this week for her birthday ! I mean really ?? This is what got me even more angrier.She's the one that put me in this situation first of all.She did not do what she was suppose to do before she decided to bring me to the US when I was a kid.I spent almost my whole life living in limitation because of my immigration status./Now that I can finally solve this problem and live a normal life,she turns around does this to me.Now I have to wait to send out my application..This was very very selfish of her.I dont think I could ever forgive her or have a normal relationship with her.We weren't on good terms for about 2 years now.Things just got worse! Im done with her !

I think that about says what needs to be said.

[Adriene H 89]

Family & Money matters never mesh well

[Dave&Roza 748]

Why didn't the Uncle give the money directly to you? I hope this works out for you.

Dave

[beejay 123]

I am so sorry to hear this. Nothing can change this now but it sounds like your uncle should have given the money to you. I know you finally have a chance to change your status and at the very least I hope you can get the money from your mom. It's too bad but it sounds like that relationship is going to take some time to heal, if ever.

Well this is family issue, pity for you but please post it in appropriate section. Hope you will solve the problem. Good luck.

The magical elf mods don't just appear when you type that. If you feel a post needs to be moved push report in the left hand corner of your post and let a mod know you think it needs to be moved.

[Ban Hammer 12,861]

Well this is family issue, pity for you but please post it in appropriate section. Hope you will solve the problem. Good luck.

it's about aos and unless the op is adjusting from a family based visa, it's in the right forum.

[bste3 0]

No offense but if you can't even afford the documents on your own, how will you support someone in this country?

[jojolicious 38]

Wow! You're angry now and you have every right to be but she's still your mom. Just be aware of who and how she is and adjust your behaviour accordingly. I hope you get the money needed for your AOS soon.

[Maria TH 20]

Can you tell your uncle to ask money back from your mom? She might have to listen to him since it was his money.

I'm glad to hear that you want to calm down.. so calm down. Being mad at your mother will not make anything better though.

Sit and talk to her nicely and tell her that after you adjust status, then you can get a job and have a normal life.

Hope you can file AOS soon.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Can you tell your uncle to ask money back from your mom? She might have to listen to him since it was his money.

I doubt it will make any difference. If she had the money she'd probably hand it over. It's obvious she's spent it, and she isn't worried about any repercussions from her family over it. It also sounds like mom has a sordid history with doing the right thing, so giving her any money was probably a bad move.

Freedove, I suggest you find another way to get the money. Don't count on your mom coming through with the cash as she's obviously not to be trusted. In fact, don't depend on your mother for anything important in the future. You'll get along with her a lot better if you never put yourself in a position where you're dependent on her. You can't choose your family members, but you can choose how much you permit them to wreck your life.

FWIW, I have a couple of rules when it comes to lending money to family members:

1. Never lend money you can't afford to lose. Consider the money lost as soon as you lend it.

2. Think of the money as a gift, even if the "borrower" considers it a loan. You won't be disappointed if the money doesn't come back, and you'll consider it a blessing if it does. My oldest son has "borrowed" thousands of dollars from me over the years, and has never repaid a single nickel. I've also said "no" many times when I just couldn't afford it. We still get along fine.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

No offense but if you can't even afford the documents on your own, how will you support someone in this country?

Perfectly fine. My husband being the sole worker supports us well, we're not millionaires but we have a mortgage on a house, 3 vehicles, phones, heat, internet, food etc. But that doesn't mean that we can come up with a thousand dollars at the drop of a hat. It can take time. Especially for the OP that has been living out of status thanks to their family so unable to work legally and so surviving on one income, and probably unlike many of us who could work in our home country to save before heading over on our visas didn't have that luxury.

Don't forget for the I-130 is $420. It's $1070 for the AOS. There's also the medical fees. It's not a cheap process.

[Moomin 292]

No offense but if you can't even afford the documents on your own, how will you support someone in this country?

I don't think the OP said anything about supporting someone else. She did however say she was adjusting after being in the country since she was a kid when her mother brought her to the US. It's a bit easier to support someone(if needed) when having an EAD. Even though it's money that's been given I'd be pretty toxic if the middleman decided to pocket it and pretend nothing had happened. It was a gift. Where I'm from that's considered stealing.

[Freedove7 17]

No offense but if you can't even afford the documents on your own, how will you support someone in this country?

No offense ,but that is non of your business.

[Freedove7 17]

I don't think the OP said anything about supporting someone else. She did however say she was adjusting after being in the country since she was a kid when her mother brought her to the US. It's a bit easier to support someone(if needed) when having an EAD. Even though it's money that's been given I'd be pretty toxic if the middleman decided to pocket it and pretend nothing had happened. It was a gift. Where I'm from that's considered stealing.

.

Well said I really appreciated this gift.We just moved to a larger,more expensive apartment.I don't see anything wrong with my relative investing in my future.Money is tight,because my husband is the only one working and is currently supporting himself,my daughter and me.With that said,just because we have difficulty paying a $1,500 application fee doesn't mean my husband cannot support me.He's been doing it for 4 years now and we have never relied on the government.I wish people would stop being so narrow minded and critical.

Wow! You're angry now and you have every right to be but she's still your mom. Just be aware of who and how she is and adjust your behaviour accordingly. I hope you get the money needed for your AOS soon.

Thanks

I think that about says what needs to be said.

Lol

I am so sorry to hear this. Nothing can change this now but it sounds like your uncle should have given the money to you. I know you finally have a chance to change your status and at the very least I hope you can get the money from your mom. It's too bad but it sounds like that relationship is going to take some time to heal, if ever.

The magical elf mods don't just appear when you type that. If you feel a post needs to be moved push report in the left hand corner of your post and let a mod know you think it needs to be moved.