TBoneTX

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 'We Applaud Caesar For Doing The Right Thing And Stepping Down,' Says Senator Holding Bloody Knife CURIA OF POMPEY, ROME — As details from the recent Senatorial scuffle continue to be investigated, official sources from the Senate say that Senator Gaius Cassius has come forward, bloody knife in hand, to affirm that the senators of the Roman Republic "applaud former Dictator Julius Caesar for his decision to do the right thing and step down." Cassius and his fellow senator Marcus Junius Brutus, who were both present at a hastily organized retirement party for Caesar, said that the former Emperor who had not been seen for the last six days displayed "true patriotism" in selflessly bowing out. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/we-applaud-caesar-for-doing-the-right-thing-and-stepping-down-says-senator-holding-bloody-knife

'Donald Trump Will Destroy Democracy,' Says Party Nominating Candidate No One Voted For WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democratic leaders have stated that Donald Trump will destroy democracy, and in order to stop him, their party will endorse a candidate who has never received a single vote in a primary election. "Oh, yeah, if Trump gets in the White House, it's all over," stated Gayle Quimble, a staffer for Kamala Harris. "That's why we hand-selected a very special candidate outside the democratic process in order to beat him. Democracy itself depends on it!" https://babylonbee.com/news/donald-trump-will-destroy-democracy-says-party-endorsing-candidate-that-didnt-receive-a-single-vote

Secret Service Director Resigns In Disgrace For Failing To Assassinate Trump U.S. — Secret Service Director Kimberly Cheatle resigned this morning, after miserably failing to assassinate Donald Trump. "I'm sorry, I failed," said a tearful Cheatle in a statement. "This task of taking out Trump, who is literally Hitler, was entrusted to me, and I didn't manage to get him shot in the head on national television. I should have done better." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/secret-service-director-steps-down-due-to-failure-to-take-out-trump

WOW, Democrats Have OFFICIALLY Thrown Biden Under the Bus --> New Hur Case Transcripts MAGICALLY Show UP Well well well, look at that. Seems the wheels are well and truly coming off the Biden train and the people who have been working so hard to protect him over the years are officially tossing him under the bus, [...] https://twitchy.com/samj/2024/07/23/hur-report-hoo-boy-n2398730

'Succession by Defenestration': Jonathan Turley Slams Dems' Disposal of Biden, Coronation of Harris As I was writing the headline, I first thought about going with "The King Is 'Dead,' Long Live the Queen" — with "dead" being in quotes so as not to suggest cognitively vacant Joe Biden was actually dead. Then, after reading George Washington University Law Professor and Fox News legal analyst Jonathan Turley's column about how the Democrat Party — after three-and-a-half years of telling us Joe Biden was sharp as a tack — unceremoniously threw the poor guy under the bus, and then raced to endorse word-salad queen Kamala Harris as their 2024 presidential nominee, I had to go with Turley's "defenestration" — a perfect metaphor for what we saw happen. As defined by Brittanica, "defenestration" refers to "the act of throwing someone out of a window. Today it is more commonly used to describe the removal of someone from a position of power." Turley put it this way (emphasis, mine): [...] https://redstate.com/mike_miller/2024/07/23/succession-by-defenestration-jonathan-turley-slams-democrats-disposal-of-biden-coronation-of-harris-n2177273

Somebody at UHC was on the ball regarding a truly niche market! Really helpful of you to post this. Edited to add: What's the precise name of the policy?

Mercury Has an Eleven-Mile-Thick Layer of Diamonds, Scientists Find An excess of carbon on the planet means that Mercury is starkly drab and gray on the surface. But new research suggests that underneath, the tiny world harbors a glittering interior fit to be the jewel in the crown of our Solar System. As detailed in a new study published in the journal Nature Communications, researchers believe that Mercury has a layer of diamond up to 11 miles thick deep in the planet's rocky innards. It's a spectacular theory — one that not only dazzles the mind, but could help explain many of Mercury's puzzling attributes. [...] https://www.yahoo.com/news/mercury-eleven-mile-thick-layer-171632996.html

Some, even most, will do that.

Absolutely no one in the Bidementia administration has had to face ANY music for their disastrous incompetence.

Same could be said for Queen Sheila Jackson Lee, who just died of pancreatic cancer. Several potential successors, all vomit-level, include slimy former Houston mayor Sylvester Turner.

How any American Jew could vote Democratic this year -- or any year hereafter -- mystifies me.

A posted video has been removed by a Moderator because of family-unfriendly language.

Thrilling Tuesday report, see man: We had to brush needy miu Many (2+2) -- si man, Many (2+2) -- times yesterday/last night, needy miu man. Lunch was 2 ham/cheese sandwiches, indict all but the cheese and ingest we man. Went to Post Office and it immediately began to monsoon, great timing man. Took blessedly uninterrupted siesta, zzz we man. Din-din was Re-Modified* Tuna Glop, ingest and diet we man. *onecan Cream of Potato soup substituted for Cream of 'Shroom, filling and tasty man At night when rain had quit, went to supermarket for staples, fold spindle mutilate we man. Infernal place was completely OUT of Powerade Zero grape, man. We had to fill in with Gatorade Zero grape, nearly twice the price man. We are going to have to pay nearly $Many,000 -- si man, $Many,000 -- for our portion of hurricane-downed fence, man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. and Mini-B. are in the former's hometown for a week, border-Amazon Ecu man. Everyone there misses us, same here man. We are actually quite homesick, or Ecu-sick, for the place, like it very much we man. We must find a bilingual rubia to accompany us in the future, good luck with that man. The good news is that ex-Mrs.-T-B. is resolved to make Mini-B. get his hairs cut, months overdue man. Mini-B. looks like a poodle or English dogsheep with curls covering eyes down to nose, egad man. We would like to be a fly on the wall during the haircut-convincing and actual process, hee hee man. Last time we were there, a cut-hairing was $2 + half a buck ($Many [$2+1] for gringos), unparalleled man. Party with the rubias imminent, cavort we man. Doc appointment for us tomorrow, routine man. And that was/is our thrilling Tuesday, report we man.

Immediately drink and smoke to excess and this will be less of a worry, si mam ma'am. Number of powerless hours precised, si and see and mam ma'am. We are the one too cheap, blasphemy mam ma'am! Surpassed only by WCG, our idol man.

No, because that remains your tax address and address of record.

Study Finds Smacking Own Head Yelling 'Stupid, Stupid' Could Be Early Sign Of Low Self-Esteem JACKSONVILLE, FL—Shedding new light on the role of self-perception in human psychology, a new study published Monday by the Mayo Clinic found that smacking one's own head while yelling "Stupid, stupid, stupid" could be an early sign of low self-esteem. "While previous generations saw the act of batting at your own head in frustration as a normal part of everyday life, new research suggests that it could be linked, at least in part, to [...] https://www.theonion.com/study-finds-smacking-own-head-yelling-stupid-stupid-1851601228

Top VP Picks For Kamala Harris [...] Thanks to a tough bit of investigative journalism, we at the Babylon Bee have recovered Kamala Harris' shortlist of picks for Vice-President, which was helpfully written in crayon on a used Arby's napkin. Take a look! [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/kamala-harris-top-vp-picks

'Sorry, No Refunds,' Says Hunter Biden To All The Foreign Governments That Sent Him Bribes U.S. — After learning that Joe Biden would not seek a second presidential term, his son Hunter took it upon himself to advise all the foreign governments that had previously sent him bribe money that there would be no refunds. "Sorry, no refunds!" Hunter informed members of the Chinese government. "I believe I made that very clear when we first drew up the deal. You can still send me money [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/sorry-no-refunds-says-hunter-biden-to-all-the-foreign-governments-that-sent-him-bribes

Biden To Make Statement Via Ouija Board WASHINGTON, D.C. — In response to questions that arose from his supposedly resigning from the race and going missing for several days, the White House revealed that Joe Biden would make an official statement today via Ouija board. "Starting today, the president will answer all questions from the Great Beyond," said black and gay White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who is gay and black. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-to-make-statement-via-ouija-board

Shameful. ~~~~~~~~~~~ Biden and Kamala Both Refuse to Meet Bibi Bibi Netanyahu, who is in the midst of a war with Hamas, is flying to the United States to speak to a joint session of Congress. Kamala Harris, as President of the Senate, is supposed to preside. She is declining to do so, and has also declined to even meet with the Israeli Prime Minister. [...] https://hotair.com/david-strom/2024/07/22/kamala-refuses-to-meet-bibi-as-has-biden-n3792141

This excellent piece bluntly lays bare what the Dems have really done. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Democrats Flunk Democracy [...] Leading up to Biden's decision, 39 congressional Democrats had called for him to end his campaign, as had major donors to the party. The calls for Biden to step aside had also been pressed by elite organs of Democratic opinion such as the New York Times. These elected officials represent a small fraction of the Democratic representation of the national institution in which they serve, about 15 percent. And, of course, the Times, other media organizations, and prominent members of the donor class don't represent any voters at all. By succeeding in their undertaking, the elected nominee of one of our major political parties has been forced aside by a tiny number of people. Is this anybody's idea of democracy? [...] https://americanmind.org/salvo/democrats-flunk-democracy/

See BB cited most recently above for the probable answer.

The Dems were the ones who shut everyone else out of the primaries -- RFK Jr., Dean Phillips -- so they have zero right to complain.

Going to be a repeat, I predict.

Thrilling Monday report, see man: Did not leave the casa, no man. Lunch (at Many p.m.) was Tuna Glop, ingest and diet we man. A siesta was taken, zzz we man. Finally warshered/baked/folded laundry, domestic we man. Din-din was 2 ham-&-cheese sandwiches, indict all but the cheese and ingest we man. We will have to pay nearly $Many,000 for our portion of the hurricane-wrecked fence, man. No party with the rubias tonight, rubias getting on our nerves man. And that was/is our thrilling Monday, report we man.