EllisAndRenz

Pretty typical in the Philippines:
 
How much money does the typical Filipino keep in his bank account?   The average bank balance of most Filipinos is less than P5,000. The Bangko Sentral ng Pilipinas (BSP)'s latest report (2017) on the State of Financial Inclusion shows 62 percent of all deposit account holders in the country only keep P5,000 and below in their bank   P5000 is about 100 US Dollar.

Once you send the money, it's immediately available. The recipient will get a text message on their Philippine's line that you sent the money and that they can go pick it up whenever they want.
 
You have to put a Philippine's phone line for recipient. If your wife doesn't have one now since she's in US, she can get one when she lands and you send it via there. 
 
Use Sendwave and save that $3.99. 
Thank me later. 

Oh my this is getting complicated.
Thank you.
 

Banks only insure up to $10,000 USD in Philippine, and banks do go out of business
 
I had my wife bring me $9,000 US Dollars last months in the Philippines, she exchanged 6K at the airport and kept 3K in US Dollars.

This link no longer seems to work.  

This link no longer seems to work.  

LOL.  Nice to be remembered.  Yes, time flies.  Even I was surprised when my wife reminded me to file.  
Sounds like I'm in for a long wait.  She will be ready to apply for naturalization before this is complete.  
 

I second all of this.

Obviously if you are mentioning the age gap issue then you already have an understanding of the problem, or potential problems. If USCIS questions something, it's because they have seen it a million times and have a pretty good idea where it is going.
 
Since you did it twice, can I ask if you were specifically seeking someone with that much of an age difference or was it just happenstance both times?  Why not find someone with more life experience?

Just make sure there's no other bird warming that nest. I wouldn't even encourage you to stay at her address, should a fight ensure and being fresh of the boat, you don't know where to seek help. 

I'd say surprise her by traveling tomorrow and tell her, "Surprise, your husband is home, now you are hooked up with i864." May be the eroding love may bounce back. You want to be with your wife, travel to the US asap. Then figure out in person.
 

I'm going to jump in here.  Not sure if this will be helpful or not.

After my wife got here, also from the Philippines, she went thru a period of time where she acted similar to this.  She was physically and mentally abusive to me, all the while screaming I was abusive to her when I would never even consider laying a hand on her.  (Don't EVER do that, because then it's ALL on you.) She got jealous over things that happened only in her dreams. (You ever get yelled at for something that happened in someone's dream?  And asked to apologize for it? I did!)   She kept threatening to "go home" or to "go to a Philippine shelter". (Someone told her they exist).   At one point, after being physically assaulted, I called the police.  Since I had a mark on me and she didn't have anything, the police were going to charge her with abuse.  I declined, but that stuff stopped quickly.  She told me she was a bit shocked that in the USA they would charge a woman with abuse.  Sometime (maybe before, or after) she called some Philippine "mission" and they told her they had nothing to do with people's marriages. (I still don't know who she called, but it was weird)  After that, one of our Philippine neighbors essentially told her to cut it out.  (On these last items, I didn't have to do anything, the stars just aligned in our favor)

She subsequently got a job that she absolutely loves.  She's turned around.  She's NEVER physically abusive anymore.  Occasionally she's emotionally abusive(?) or maybe manipulative, but she's gotten so much better with that, and we are at the point now where I can go "hey, you are doing that again."  I've had my faults too (aren't we all a work in progress?), but we've grown together thru this process.

Consider this: Her voyage here was crazy for her from a mental standpoint.  She's left her whole world behind.  She is alone, except for with you. She's about as far away from home as she can get. Don't underestimate what that does to any person, especially one that has likely never traveled outside of her country.  She's transitioning from a long distance relationship to being a full time wife and partner.  That doesn't excuse the threats or the abuse.  In fact, I'd recommend asking her to go to therapy together, so a third party can help you find methods to work thru these things.  Many Filipinas have insane level jealously issues, even when unjustified.  She may need therapy to learn to deal with those feelings, which likely drive some of her behavior.  
 
Now many have said abusers never change.  That's often true.  But it's not 100% true.  It wasn't for me.  My wife and I are once again crazy mad in love with each other, and I can't think of not wanting to spend the rest of my life with her.  For the first year or so after she got here, it was pure hell.  But now, it's nice.  She's back to being the girl I fell in love with when I was living in Manila.  Our relationship is stronger than ever.  I hope this same outcome for you.

You have been given a lot of really great perspectives here.  I hope you find a solution that works for you, and I wish you the very best.  
 

I'm going to jump in here.  Not sure if this will be helpful or not.

After my wife got here, also from the Philippines, she went thru a period of time where she acted similar to this.  She was physically and mentally abusive to me, all the while screaming I was abusive to her when I would never even consider laying a hand on her.  (Don't EVER do that, because then it's ALL on you.) She got jealous over things that happened only in her dreams. (You ever get yelled at for something that happened in someone's dream?  And asked to apologize for it? I did!)   She kept threatening to "go home" or to "go to a Philippine shelter". (Someone told her they exist).   At one point, after being physically assaulted, I called the police.  Since I had a mark on me and she didn't have anything, the police were going to charge her with abuse.  I declined, but that stuff stopped quickly.  She told me she was a bit shocked that in the USA they would charge a woman with abuse.  Sometime (maybe before, or after) she called some Philippine "mission" and they told her they had nothing to do with people's marriages. (I still don't know who she called, but it was weird)  After that, one of our Philippine neighbors essentially told her to cut it out.  (On these last items, I didn't have to do anything, the stars just aligned in our favor)

She subsequently got a job that she absolutely loves.  She's turned around.  She's NEVER physically abusive anymore.  Occasionally she's emotionally abusive(?) or maybe manipulative, but she's gotten so much better with that, and we are at the point now where I can go "hey, you are doing that again."  I've had my faults too (aren't we all a work in progress?), but we've grown together thru this process.

Consider this: Her voyage here was crazy for her from a mental standpoint.  She's left her whole world behind.  She is alone, except for with you. She's about as far away from home as she can get. Don't underestimate what that does to any person, especially one that has likely never traveled outside of her country.  She's transitioning from a long distance relationship to being a full time wife and partner.  That doesn't excuse the threats or the abuse.  In fact, I'd recommend asking her to go to therapy together, so a third party can help you find methods to work thru these things.  Many Filipinas have insane level jealously issues, even when unjustified.  She may need therapy to learn to deal with those feelings, which likely drive some of her behavior.  
 
Now many have said abusers never change.  That's often true.  But it's not 100% true.  It wasn't for me.  My wife and I are once again crazy mad in love with each other, and I can't think of not wanting to spend the rest of my life with her.  For the first year or so after she got here, it was pure hell.  But now, it's nice.  She's back to being the girl I fell in love with when I was living in Manila.  Our relationship is stronger than ever.  I hope this same outcome for you.

You have been given a lot of really great perspectives here.  I hope you find a solution that works for you, and I wish you the very best.  
 

You go to therapy together to ensure that 1) They go, 2) The therapist can get the complete picture.  (As described by our licensed therapist). I assume you are one as well with a differing opinion.  That's fine councilor. 

And this ... along with my advice ... is worth what we all paid for it.  Take it for what it's worth.  
 

I'm going to jump in here.  Not sure if this will be helpful or not.

After my wife got here, also from the Philippines, she went thru a period of time where she acted similar to this.  She was physically and mentally abusive to me, all the while screaming I was abusive to her when I would never even consider laying a hand on her.  (Don't EVER do that, because then it's ALL on you.) She got jealous over things that happened only in her dreams. (You ever get yelled at for something that happened in someone's dream?  And asked to apologize for it? I did!)   She kept threatening to "go home" or to "go to a Philippine shelter". (Someone told her they exist).   At one point, after being physically assaulted, I called the police.  Since I had a mark on me and she didn't have anything, the police were going to charge her with abuse.  I declined, but that stuff stopped quickly.  She told me she was a bit shocked that in the USA they would charge a woman with abuse.  Sometime (maybe before, or after) she called some Philippine "mission" and they told her they had nothing to do with people's marriages. (I still don't know who she called, but it was weird)  After that, one of our Philippine neighbors essentially told her to cut it out.  (On these last items, I didn't have to do anything, the stars just aligned in our favor)

She subsequently got a job that she absolutely loves.  She's turned around.  She's NEVER physically abusive anymore.  Occasionally she's emotionally abusive(?) or maybe manipulative, but she's gotten so much better with that, and we are at the point now where I can go "hey, you are doing that again."  I've had my faults too (aren't we all a work in progress?), but we've grown together thru this process.

Consider this: Her voyage here was crazy for her from a mental standpoint.  She's left her whole world behind.  She is alone, except for with you. She's about as far away from home as she can get. Don't underestimate what that does to any person, especially one that has likely never traveled outside of her country.  She's transitioning from a long distance relationship to being a full time wife and partner.  That doesn't excuse the threats or the abuse.  In fact, I'd recommend asking her to go to therapy together, so a third party can help you find methods to work thru these things.  Many Filipinas have insane level jealously issues, even when unjustified.  She may need therapy to learn to deal with those feelings, which likely drive some of her behavior.  
 
Now many have said abusers never change.  That's often true.  But it's not 100% true.  It wasn't for me.  My wife and I are once again crazy mad in love with each other, and I can't think of not wanting to spend the rest of my life with her.  For the first year or so after she got here, it was pure hell.  But now, it's nice.  She's back to being the girl I fell in love with when I was living in Manila.  Our relationship is stronger than ever.  I hope this same outcome for you.

You have been given a lot of really great perspectives here.  I hope you find a solution that works for you, and I wish you the very best.  
 

I'm going to jump in here.  Not sure if this will be helpful or not.

After my wife got here, also from the Philippines, she went thru a period of time where she acted similar to this.  She was physically and mentally abusive to me, all the while screaming I was abusive to her when I would never even consider laying a hand on her.  (Don't EVER do that, because then it's ALL on you.) She got jealous over things that happened only in her dreams. (You ever get yelled at for something that happened in someone's dream?  And asked to apologize for it? I did!)   She kept threatening to "go home" or to "go to a Philippine shelter". (Someone told her they exist).   At one point, after being physically assaulted, I called the police.  Since I had a mark on me and she didn't have anything, the police were going to charge her with abuse.  I declined, but that stuff stopped quickly.  She told me she was a bit shocked that in the USA they would charge a woman with abuse.  Sometime (maybe before, or after) she called some Philippine "mission" and they told her they had nothing to do with people's marriages. (I still don't know who she called, but it was weird)  After that, one of our Philippine neighbors essentially told her to cut it out.  (On these last items, I didn't have to do anything, the stars just aligned in our favor)

She subsequently got a job that she absolutely loves.  She's turned around.  She's NEVER physically abusive anymore.  Occasionally she's emotionally abusive(?) or maybe manipulative, but she's gotten so much better with that, and we are at the point now where I can go "hey, you are doing that again."  I've had my faults too (aren't we all a work in progress?), but we've grown together thru this process.

Consider this: Her voyage here was crazy for her from a mental standpoint.  She's left her whole world behind.  She is alone, except for with you. She's about as far away from home as she can get. Don't underestimate what that does to any person, especially one that has likely never traveled outside of her country.  She's transitioning from a long distance relationship to being a full time wife and partner.  That doesn't excuse the threats or the abuse.  In fact, I'd recommend asking her to go to therapy together, so a third party can help you find methods to work thru these things.  Many Filipinas have insane level jealously issues, even when unjustified.  She may need therapy to learn to deal with those feelings, which likely drive some of her behavior.  
 
Now many have said abusers never change.  That's often true.  But it's not 100% true.  It wasn't for me.  My wife and I are once again crazy mad in love with each other, and I can't think of not wanting to spend the rest of my life with her.  For the first year or so after she got here, it was pure hell.  But now, it's nice.  She's back to being the girl I fell in love with when I was living in Manila.  Our relationship is stronger than ever.  I hope this same outcome for you.

You have been given a lot of really great perspectives here.  I hope you find a solution that works for you, and I wish you the very best.  
 

I'm going to jump in here.  Not sure if this will be helpful or not.

After my wife got here, also from the Philippines, she went thru a period of time where she acted similar to this.  She was physically and mentally abusive to me, all the while screaming I was abusive to her when I would never even consider laying a hand on her.  (Don't EVER do that, because then it's ALL on you.) She got jealous over things that happened only in her dreams. (You ever get yelled at for something that happened in someone's dream?  And asked to apologize for it? I did!)   She kept threatening to "go home" or to "go to a Philippine shelter". (Someone told her they exist).   At one point, after being physically assaulted, I called the police.  Since I had a mark on me and she didn't have anything, the police were going to charge her with abuse.  I declined, but that stuff stopped quickly.  She told me she was a bit shocked that in the USA they would charge a woman with abuse.  Sometime (maybe before, or after) she called some Philippine "mission" and they told her they had nothing to do with people's marriages. (I still don't know who she called, but it was weird)  After that, one of our Philippine neighbors essentially told her to cut it out.  (On these last items, I didn't have to do anything, the stars just aligned in our favor)

She subsequently got a job that she absolutely loves.  She's turned around.  She's NEVER physically abusive anymore.  Occasionally she's emotionally abusive(?) or maybe manipulative, but she's gotten so much better with that, and we are at the point now where I can go "hey, you are doing that again."  I've had my faults too (aren't we all a work in progress?), but we've grown together thru this process.

Consider this: Her voyage here was crazy for her from a mental standpoint.  She's left her whole world behind.  She is alone, except for with you. She's about as far away from home as she can get. Don't underestimate what that does to any person, especially one that has likely never traveled outside of her country.  She's transitioning from a long distance relationship to being a full time wife and partner.  That doesn't excuse the threats or the abuse.  In fact, I'd recommend asking her to go to therapy together, so a third party can help you find methods to work thru these things.  Many Filipinas have insane level jealously issues, even when unjustified.  She may need therapy to learn to deal with those feelings, which likely drive some of her behavior.  
 
Now many have said abusers never change.  That's often true.  But it's not 100% true.  It wasn't for me.  My wife and I are once again crazy mad in love with each other, and I can't think of not wanting to spend the rest of my life with her.  For the first year or so after she got here, it was pure hell.  But now, it's nice.  She's back to being the girl I fell in love with when I was living in Manila.  Our relationship is stronger than ever.  I hope this same outcome for you.

You have been given a lot of really great perspectives here.  I hope you find a solution that works for you, and I wish you the very best.  
 

I'm going to jump in here.  Not sure if this will be helpful or not.

After my wife got here, also from the Philippines, she went thru a period of time where she acted similar to this.  She was physically and mentally abusive to me, all the while screaming I was abusive to her when I would never even consider laying a hand on her.  (Don't EVER do that, because then it's ALL on you.) She got jealous over things that happened only in her dreams. (You ever get yelled at for something that happened in someone's dream?  And asked to apologize for it? I did!)   She kept threatening to "go home" or to "go to a Philippine shelter". (Someone told her they exist).   At one point, after being physically assaulted, I called the police.  Since I had a mark on me and she didn't have anything, the police were going to charge her with abuse.  I declined, but that stuff stopped quickly.  She told me she was a bit shocked that in the USA they would charge a woman with abuse.  Sometime (maybe before, or after) she called some Philippine "mission" and they told her they had nothing to do with people's marriages. (I still don't know who she called, but it was weird)  After that, one of our Philippine neighbors essentially told her to cut it out.  (On these last items, I didn't have to do anything, the stars just aligned in our favor)

She subsequently got a job that she absolutely loves.  She's turned around.  She's NEVER physically abusive anymore.  Occasionally she's emotionally abusive(?) or maybe manipulative, but she's gotten so much better with that, and we are at the point now where I can go "hey, you are doing that again."  I've had my faults too (aren't we all a work in progress?), but we've grown together thru this process.

Consider this: Her voyage here was crazy for her from a mental standpoint.  She's left her whole world behind.  She is alone, except for with you. She's about as far away from home as she can get. Don't underestimate what that does to any person, especially one that has likely never traveled outside of her country.  She's transitioning from a long distance relationship to being a full time wife and partner.  That doesn't excuse the threats or the abuse.  In fact, I'd recommend asking her to go to therapy together, so a third party can help you find methods to work thru these things.  Many Filipinas have insane level jealously issues, even when unjustified.  She may need therapy to learn to deal with those feelings, which likely drive some of her behavior.  
 
Now many have said abusers never change.  That's often true.  But it's not 100% true.  It wasn't for me.  My wife and I are once again crazy mad in love with each other, and I can't think of not wanting to spend the rest of my life with her.  For the first year or so after she got here, it was pure hell.  But now, it's nice.  She's back to being the girl I fell in love with when I was living in Manila.  Our relationship is stronger than ever.  I hope this same outcome for you.

You have been given a lot of really great perspectives here.  I hope you find a solution that works for you, and I wish you the very best.  
 

call her bluff and check in to the battered shelter yourself. Seems you have a valid case of spousal abuse.

Thanks for that. 

Yeah, if it was just her father and grandmother (her mother passed away) I'd have less of an issue with it, but it's extended family and everyone else over there that thinks she married Warren Buffet.  
 

Thanks for that. 

Yeah, if it was just her father and grandmother (her mother passed away) I'd have less of an issue with it, but it's extended family and everyone else over there that thinks she married Warren Buffet.  
 

Super to hear!

Great it is working out.

For those that have been following our journey.  
 
It's been a long one.  It started when we both met while I was on a long term work assignment in Makati.  Then we had the long-distance relationship which had it's ups and downs.   Eventually we were united and we started off happy. 

That's when things got "interesting".   Her jealous nature, my ignorance as to how certain things would be perceived and both of our needing to learn about each other.  (Example:  Going from a long-distance relationship to being married within 90 days has an adjustment period that will always catch by surprise).  The other aspect was extended family causing issues for us as well.  Combine this with my wife's insane temper and it was a rough ride for a bit.  
 
I'm happy to say that I truly believe we are past the worst and we will have a very bright future.  My wife really stepped up during some recent tragedies in the family, and of course she earned the respect of everyone in my extended family.    More important than that however I think she's learned to bond and understand some members of my extended family.  My wife has settled into her new job and is looking beyond that.  She's become independent while also being a loyal and supportive wife.  
 
I guess my points are:  These things aren't easy.  Paradise isn't free.  Stick with it, never let each other go, and no matter how bad things can seem at some times, they can work out.  
 
Thank you all here for your endless support and advice.  It has been very much appreciated.

I still come back to this thread from time to time.  That day she arrived in the USA you were all so great.  Wife and I are stronger than ever now, and I can't imagine a moment without her.  I know she feels the same about me.  We have a wonderful future.  
 
And ... (as much as can be possible in this virtual world), you've all been great friends.
Thank you