PrincyE

Okay... Wish you all the best!

This is just my opinion. One thing that I learned from fiancé, is try to avoid discussing an issue(s) when you are mad. It will make things worse. When people are mad, they are more likely respond based on their emotion not their mind. They will not think rationally before response. When she refused to have “unprotected sex” you should stop discuss about it immediately. She already said that she don’t want that, by keep on questioning about why she doesn’t want to do that, whether or not she love you or point out how she behave, and even threatened to break the wedding ring, do you think everything will get better? Is unprotected sex is a must for you? Why you keep on wanting unprotected sex, you want a child? If yes, you should wait until she ready. For me you are so immature. To be a husband is not easy, and I don’t think you are not ready to be an husband yet. I think, if I having husband just like you, I will left the house too. You broke the wedding ring just because having small argument. What will happen if you having big argument? If I put myself in her position, I will questioning myself “What will happen if we having big argument? What will you break this time, what will you do this time, what will you threatened me this time, will we able to work that out, will you keep on pushing me doing something I’m not ready yet”.

You naughty naughty person

You had me following you for quite a while before you said this. You sound like you were not even ready for marriage yet. I blame you just as much, if not more than her. You probably should have sought counseling before you got to this point.
 
Now was she refusing sex? Or just refusing unprotected sex? She has a right to refuse either but a spouse refusing sex is a reason for divorce. If the "unprotected" part is the issue, then you two have a serious communication problem. A couple has kids when BOTH people decided to have kids because it is a life changing commitment. If you got engaged and then married without discussing if and when you plan to have kids, you had no business getting married.
 
Think about this...What did you accomplish by destroying the ring? What did it prove? Was that an adult way of communicating your feelings?
 
Just file for divorce and be done with it. You have been given enough advice to do that. 

Yeah he has still not answered my question about how he acted when she said she didn't want sex. A woman doesn't just up and leave the house and wants divorce unless he acted in a way that made her flee the home. 
 
I feel that if it was as simple as she all of a sudden didn't want to have sex and he was cool with it, she would have stayed and maybe start making threats about abuse and green card. 

Call me evil. I would go to that interview and let the officer know what is going on of her demands  and of her leaving home and etc. 
Have you been given a interview date? Cause some K1 filing AOS don't go through a interview.
Be upfront with USCIS, cause if you ever file again, your hands will be clean.
 
You will be able to get a divorce, but in California, California is a “community property” state, which means that property acquired during a marriage by California spouses is generally considered the property of both parties and can be divided equally by a California court during a divorce. Debts acquired during the marriage are also considered community property.
 
Speak with a divorce lawyer on this part.

Having worked in government offices over the summer in the past, it's definitely not incompetence. People are hired with very little training and are timed on everything they do. They work long hours and for little pay. The computer systems are antiquated and sometimes simply pressing the wrong key gives you a bad day with no way to fix it until inter-office audit happens. It's a real mess.
 
They have something like 10,000,000 visas to process every single year, and have a staff of around 19,000. You do the math and try to keep up.

Go to a temp agency and inquire there.
 
Going home 2-3 times because you are homesick will take a big chunk of your income when you only work a few months here and there
for peanuts.
Hope you can make your "home" in this country and work together to make a life for the both of you as a new family unit.
Focus on a good career here that will make you both live comfortable, leaving for home all the time will interfere with stable employment
and contributing in a meaningful way to the household.
 

Get advice from a very experienced immigration attorney , don't give up . Ive seen time línes of people that were denied 2 even 3 times but at the end they needed up bringing their loved one and are together now . 

If somebody cannot afford AOS, then a K-1 is not the best route. A CR-1 would be much more appropriate. The (enforceable) affidavit of support only comes into play once it is executed...upon approval of AOS. Prior to then, the I-864 has no weight.
 
To be clear...I'm not saying the USC shouldn't help (financially or otherwise) with AOS. But at the end of the day, filing for AOS is the responsibility of the intending immigrant. They're the one with so much to lose by not doing so.

That's exactly what I had.
Like every time we had a serious fight, he'd say "so go to your fn Ukraine if you don't like smth". I wish I listened to him and went home earlier.
 
I seriously don't get it though, why'd someone go through all the trouble with visa, waiting and all that, to just kick you out like a dog once something went wrong.

My husband can't afford any of it (filing AOS or therapy.. He spends everything he makes on his son because they're separated with his mom and he tries to compensate not being there for his kid, with buying him all kinds of expensive stuff he points at.
Also, he doesn't consider us to be family since we don't have kids. He has told me many times that I'll never mean even 1\4 of what his son means to him, so I just live in the shadow of his son.
My husband doesn't want to spend time with me, all our time spent together is going to grocery store and like once in 2 weeks he'll go to park with me for a short walk. We sleep in separate rooms, he never shows any affection..basically, we're just roommates who seem to hate each other. It was different when I just came, but now it's just like this because he is probably bored, as the toy is not new anymore. So I don't think therapy would help, I just picked someone who doesn't care about me and wasn't able to recognize that before we got married.
 
Sorry about ranting here and telling all sorts of personal things, I just can't really tell this to anyone in real life, it's too embarassing.

Unfortunately I have seen some cases where the USC treated their immigrant spouse / K1 fiance like a package that they can ship back to their country if things don't work out in the first 3 months or they use that "power" to show who is in control to put it in a way. Thanks God no all USC are like these. 

They have only been married 6 months! G eeze some people wait years to file! Everyone has a different circumstance and not everyone is as knowledgeable as us on VJ. Lmao 
Hopefully she can figure it out w her husband and still file. Who knows what situation them as a couple are in! At this point she already overstayed so getting any non immigrant visa after this will be impossible! Perhaps she can work it out w her husband. 
 

Some people can't afford to file right away.  
 
OP would you be willing to do therapy? The first 6 months are the hardest especially if you can't work and have nothing to do all day.  I know the first 3 months alone were fights every day.  It is not easy for anyone in this situation...it's new.  You are adjusting to a new country and marriage. While the USC is also adjusting to while trying to help you adjust.  This process is not easy but if you both can get through this it will be better.  Until the AOS papers were filed we fought constantly. The USC has to understand this is a huge change for you....it takes work on both parts. This is just such a huge adjustment 6 months has been the hardest for us. 

Yes, maybe I am reading too much into it but who would not assist their new spouse in filing for AOS as soon as they married? It is the US citizen's responsibility because he/she is the sponsor. There are plenty of cases on VJ in which the US citizen changes their mind without realizing the consequences for the other person. You are basically asking someone to leave their country, sell everything, to move half around the world and you are going to leave them hanging? Without AOS it means OP cannot even work so she has no money.
 
 

I'm so sorry to hear that things didn't work out  
Well, I'm from Canada which might be different, but when I entered the US on the K1 visa, I asked the customers officers if things didn't work out, can i still come to the US to visit / go shopping / travel. They said yes, absolutely. 
 
But of course, that means you need to follow the rules and go back home as soon as you're able to. Then if you want to come back as a visitor in the future, they might interview you and you can tell them the truth. They will be glad you are honest and followed the rules.

The consequences are you have to go back to your country or live in fear of being deported as an illegal if you stay.

Their marriage was supposed to be bona fide and he wants a divorce 6 months after they got married. This sounds like someone pretty petty that basically does not care about the other person. It would have been fraud if they had applied for a K1 and gotten married for the GC. That is not the case. 

I'm 23 he's 28 never married no kids both good jobs good income no previous marriage or K1 petition we met on social media but I'm good friends with his cousin who attends my church. but I had only known him for about 4 months before going over there then we for engaged the first trip but we talked about it before the trip. I guess when you know you know, 😊 the petetion wasn't filed until 5 months after the engagement because we wanted to be sure and  then I took a second long trip over there. We've only been together for a year now. I'm just afraid they will say we got engaged to fast and that's been bothering me a lot. I see lots of people denied for that 

Hey---like you said---when you know, you know    
Your close in age, which means you have a lot in common most likely...you know one of his relatives "in person"...both on your first marriage....you both work...you waited before filing instead of running and doing it immediately...so you've been engaged for, what---9 months before filing?  These are good things in your favor so please try to think positive!!  I know it's easy for me to say and you'll worry anyhow---I'm a worry wart too.  And trust me, every single person here in these forums knows what it's like to think of the worst when dealing with immigration in any form.
 
I wish you and him the best of luck!
 
 

I would not pursue a spouse visa (it usually takes longer), I think that in your case would be better to try the K1 (finance visa), it might show them that you actually have good intentions with the marriage...I'm with a pending AOS and my husband is 28 years older than me, the big difference between my case and yours is that we met each other online  in August of 2010 and spoke on the internet for a little over a year before meeting in person, he visited my country 2 months after our first meeting that happened in February of 2012 in Mexico and I applied for a Tourist Visa right after he left Brazil in April of 2012.
After my visa was approved I visited USA many times to be with him and he visited me once more in my home country in 2014. The last time that I came was September of 2016 and we were planning on getting married in my country in January of 2017. As we had the opportunity to buy a house last December, the money got short and a big wedding in Brazil was out of the plate...because of it we decide to get married here wile I was in my tourist visa and now I'm going through the AOS process.
I think you should enjoy her visit wile she is there, take as much pictures as you can in different places with different people and try to apply for finance visa, there are plenty of people that get it after only meeting in person for once. I don't think that the fact that she is disabled will affect your application (it would be a huge sign of prejudice against disabled people) she have as much right as anyone else to fall in love and be loved, and as of for you, I don't see why you could not fall in love with her because I don't believe anyone can truly fall in love with a body, you love the person and how she makes you feel, not what she look like!!!, just make sure that you have a strong relationship and that you're prepared to explain the reasons why you love her and why you want to be with her. I never thought that I would fall in love with a man that was older than my father, but here I am madly in love and not giving a dam about the age gap or about other people think about it.
Make sure you know your partner and that she knows you too as you can't really fall in love to someone that you don't really know...love letters exchange will help, e-mails, money transferences and even the fact that you paid for her ticket to come and see you, all of it will be helpful for your case.
Good luck to you, peace!

Do you have kids?
Are you fine with not having kids?
How will you take care of her once you get here?
Will you guys still live with her mother?
 
I would suggest that you meet more then once. Right now as you say you have talked online for less then a year she is in your homecountry now (a hard embassy and most likely AP time also) for the first time and you will get married. 
She is 20 years older then you.
 
 
See it from the embassy point of view. A young male with his whole life in front of him finds a 20 year older disabled women. He is saying now to a future family and so and they have know each other for under a year met once where they also got married and then apply for visa right after.

Hello! You share a very similar situation to mine  Don't be nervous and trust in yourself. Once you get to Nigeria and see him you will know. I met my fiance in January 2016 and went to see him this Feb for 2 weeks. It was an awesome experience and his family, friends and the locals were SUPER nice. Don't let the "stereotypes" get you down, you know him and he knows you! Also, as long as you can prove your relationship is real through pictures and conversations (and other documents you send), you will be fine! I hope you have so much fun and really enjoy yourself. Feel free to send messages if you need any assistance!! 

My fiance and I met face to face 6 months after we started talking.   He proposed about a week into my first trip.   I came home and filed a few months later because we were waiting on some documents, although I would have filed right after my trip otherwise.  We knew before I even visited that we were in love and wanted to spend our lives together.  Meeting just confirmed what we already knew.  When you know, you know! 
 
My advice-
1) Like others have said, take lots of pictures with him, his family, places you're going, etc.
2)  Keep receipts from activities that you do, as well as your boarding passes.
3)  FRONT LOAD your petition.   This is one of the most important things for Nigeria. 
4)  Most importantly, be careful.  Have fun and enjoy yourself and your time together.   And eat Suya (haha)!
 
I have now visited four times and was present on the grounds for his interviews although Nigeria doesn't let you go in with them for the interview like some consulates do.  I highly suggest being there for his interview if you do end up filing for him.  
 
If you read my story don't be alarmed that we were denied because it was for other reasons.  We were initially approved having only met one time before filing, only knowing each other 6 months before getting engaged, and getting engaged on the first trip.  The interview was my third trip there.  The important thing is to front load and have all the right evidence of your relationship.  It's all about being prepared and being honest!
 
Safe travels!   Always here if you have any questions!
 
On another note, make sure you apply for your Nigerian visa on time because sometimes they take a bit of time!