She wants to go back Home (Philippines)

[Clariz 2]

I hope you told her truthfully that you have 2 sons in your care before you married. Being at home, sometimes is a boring life. Find her a job where she can utilize her 8 hours on something. But if she is more of a nanny than your wife then that is something out of balance. What you need is a servant!

[rlogan 2,036]

I don't know were to start? She want's me to give up my two young boys to my X who is the none custodial parent. She wants her own family/kids....mmhmhm Well of course,, I understand

I said! She also can not find work. .,,,so she wants to go back.?

Not a lot of detail in this dramatic opener. Is this just an out-of-the-blue announcement of hers like she just flipped out, or is it pretty clear she has not been happy all along or what?

[jameugiekaxavilon 25]

I am sorry to hear this happen to you. I know every woman wants to have their own kid, as me myself wants to have my own kid in time but it sound selfish of her to tell you to give up your kid from your ex. As she is married to you it means she should accept everything you have in your past. True love is not selfish. I hope everything will work good for both of you.

[james&olya 1,121]

Some women are like this. They are narcissistic and controlling! Life with this kind of woman can be hell on earth! I know from very painful experience. Cut your losses and get her out of your life! You can do better!

[BethandBilly 86]

I just read a story in the paper which horrified me, I won't go in to details, but needless to say, put your kids first, make sure they are at all times safe with your wife and that she doesn't grow to resent them. Resentment can set in from very early on, so just be on the look out for it.

As others have said, did you actually tell your wife that your children lived with you before she moved to the US, was she aware she would be one of their carers, its a lot of responsibility to take on someone else's children. Speaking as a Stepparent, I can honestly say I love my husbands children like they are my own, they are treated as an equal to our son, I cannot generalize about Stepparents, but I can hope others would feel as I do.

I wish you well in the future, it seems to me thought that you have only one choice and that is to remove your wife from the situation and stick close to your children, they are you bloody, they need you, do not give them away, please.

[djamella 5]

I don't know were to start? She want's me to give up my two young boys to my X who is the none custodial parent. She wants her own family/kids....mmhmhm Well of course,, I understand

I said! She also can not find work. .,,,so she wants to go back.?

I am sorry to hear this, but this isnt the place to talk about your private problems ... people just talk and give advice as if they knew your situation,

as if they knew your relationship ... but noone can and thats just a fact. I wish you all the best and hopefully you both will solve the problem in peace!

Stay blessed!

[naplesguy 25]

Well, out of Christian conscience and not believeing in divorce I endured marriage to a selfish American woman who eventually left me and our sons when they were teenagers.

Assuming your house is in order and you love the woman and are not just using her, better let her go now and look for someone else that accepts and understands your circumstances.

On the other hand, if she can't find work, perhaps she can go to school and develope a marketable occupation. I may just be madning to her to sit around the house and feel useless.

[Shenkles 2]

I hope I misunderstood you.

Your new wife wants you to give up custody of your two young boys, because she wants her own? Great. Tell her to go find a guy who doesn't have children. I hope you're not even considering this. Put her on the first plane back.

Do you have any idea the damage it would do to your boys if you ship them off, essentially reject them, in favor of "new" kids? You can't do that to them. If she doesn't want your boys then she doesn't want you. End this before she gets pregnant. She will never treat your boys like her own. Don't hurt them that way, please.

I agree with you..she doesn't want your boys , she doesn't want you.. she went to USA for you not work...why would she go back if she cant find work...so selfish...

[Crashed~N2~Me 970]

I wonder ...why do so many VJ's use the phrase..."send her back"...?

Why don't more VJ's use the phrase..."let her go"...?

[k man12 4]

maybe a mis understanding ..only u guys can solve the problem..writing here and letting everybody knows about the situation is not good to both of you..both of you need to sit and talk and you guys will understand each other. if still didnt work try counseling...im pretty sure you love each other and sending her back to her country is NOT or NEVEr a good advise.its easy for them to say things like that because they r not in ur shoes..goodluck!!!

The poster was right to seek advise here and what everybody is saying about her been selfish is correct. it is very unfortunate for the wife to demand the kids be sent away and you ought to realise that.

[Crashed~N2~Me 970]

It's my opinion you don't have to like it but you also don't have to try to make smart comments about it.

1) This is a public forum. When you post on it...your post becomes available for discussion.

2) I would rather make "smart" comments than give "ignorant" advice.

[Sandra G. 5,016]

Do not give up your kids because of a selfish %$^&*^%$. Buy her a return ticket tonight!.Do not waste one more day of your life with this kind of woman.

[Crashed~N2~Me 970]

Do not give up your kids because of a selfish %$^&*^%$. Buy her a return ticket tonight!.Do not waste one more day of your life with this kind of woman.

Another close friend of OP's family?

Yeah...looking at their pics...it's very obvious...she's just a "selfish %$^&*^%$".

Do you ever consider motivation? Action is often a reaction. Cause and Effect. Her request probably "reflects" household behavior. Think about it.

Edited June 26, 2012 by Crashed~N2~Me

[Cathi 5,610]

Some women are like this. They are narcissistic and controlling! Life with this kind of woman can be hell on earth! I know from very painful experience. Cut your losses and get her out of your life! You can do better!

Many men are the same. Not fair to generalize. As you can see from all the comments on this thread all of the women say his wife is wrong.

[Cathi 5,610]

Your children depend on you. Just think of the pain and confusion they will have if you ever sent them back to their mom. You didn't add any details to your post, but if what you say is what she truly wants you need to send her packing.