Happy Endings In Sub Sarahan

[Cheyemo 8]

Thanks Cheyemo!

Here's more info: Pman is like a kid in a candy shop here. It was a little chilly for him at first, but those days are over. It's now a Hotlanta summer like no other

He's used to being on the go and is trying to adjust to this slower pace. The minute he stops moving or I go to work, he falls asleep. Sigh... I love my little Netflix addict.

I really wonder how it will be when my honey arrives. One thing is we have a son he hasn't even met yet so I guess he'll keep him busy for a while! I wish you and Pman the best!

[Pman's Wife 0]

A son? That's going to be awesome! I know it must be hard to contain your excitement. Hang in there. The visa race is not always swift, but for those who endure, there is usually a sweet reward at the end .

[taurean 0]

I really wonder how it will be when my honey arrives. One thing is we have a son he hasn't even met yet so I guess he'll keep him busy for a while! I wish you and Pman the best!

Oh wow! Congratulations on the birth of your son. I hope you all are reunited soon!!!!

[Cheyemo 8]

A son? That's going to be awesome! I know it must be hard to contain your excitement. Hang in there. The visa race is not always swift, but for those who endure, there is usually a sweet reward at the end .

Oh wow! Congratulations on the birth of your son. I hope you all are reunited soon!!!!

Thank you both ladies! It will be nice to see him hold our little one. I'm in that race and running patiently.

[ForeverAmen 0]

Hello! Sorry I have not been posting much. But ... I'm still here. My husband and I have been married for 4 years. We recently gave birth to our first child almost two months ago. Our marriage is not perfect, nor is it aweful. Each 'valley' experience is a moment to strengthen our relationship for the better. I must say that we've endured matters in which I really believed we were at the end of our journey, but with an attitude of love and fortitude on both our parts, were still holding strong.

Oh well ... it's time for another feeding. So I will come back again when I have more time.

Boaz

[onwa 6]

We've been married almost 5 years. We're done with USCIS as my husband has his citizenship. We've own a house in a nice neighborhood and have a beautiful 15 month old daughter. But my husband is done living the American dream and we are looking to relocate back to Africa. Although it got easier to adjust in some ways as time went on, its also gotten harder. We laugh and love alot, but the bicultural marriage is still hard.

[Nwanyioma 11]

Cheers to more happy beginnings and never sad endings!!!! Its good to read encouraging post despite all the negativity from other posts. My lovely husband has been here in a little over 2 months and we are enjoying each other. We have our little bickering here and there but we are definitely getting used to each other. As each day goes by, we love each other more and more everyday. Looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him and each other.

With that be said readers and posters of happy ending, please dont let members misfortunes or mishaps spoil your joy. Enjoy married life and revel in it. I say cheers to married life, happy beginnings and wonderful irreplaceable memories.

Nwanyioma

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

Have you spent much time in Nigeria ? We are also going to be building there and I wonder how you find living there .

We've been married almost 5 years. We're done with USCIS as my husband has his citizenship. We've own a house in a nice neighborhood and have a beautiful 15 month old daughter. But my husband is done living the American dream and we are looking to relocate back to Africa. Although it got easier to adjust in some ways as time went on, its also gotten harder. We laugh and love alot, but the bicultural marriage is still hard.

[masterpiece 2]

Great thread...NigeriaorBust...Come to think of it...Great user name too.

May you never bust at the seams! Go on give me a chorus to that.......

Very often folks forget this marriage issue (and the problems that often arise therein) are not exclusive to those that marry outside their race or tribe. Here is a simple fact: If you have lived in the states for awhile and you marry someone who has spent most of their adult life in sub-saharan Africa, chances are both of you will be going through some major, major, changes and battles during the early stages of your marriage.

These dynamics are also at play when you do not take the acclimatizing bit into the equation.

Understanding therefore that marriage by itself is a work in progress as so many have already alluded to in earlier posts is critical. Then recalling that the work in progress is often compounded by layers of swirling emotions induced, and catalyzed, by the whole USCIS process may well be something to remind yourself each day since the process can be prolonged.

I have found that the key to simplifying this work-in-progress is to amplify the positives and downplay the negatives. Oh and by the way, like most marriages it helps to eschew discussing what transpires between man and wife to outsiders (friends and family inclusive)and simply working it out.

Are there any quick fixes to this word- marriage? Heck no. If in doubt , ask Al and Tipper who, after 40years, suddenly realise they have grown apart.I tell you, this work-in-progress can become an uphill battle never to be surmounted without help from God.

Here`s wishing y`all a wonderful journey....not just the USCIS trip but in the more important journey called life..

Edited June 2, 2010 by masterpiece

[GabiandVi 34]

We've been married for 5.5 years, but due to work, finances, and immigration, we lived apart for longer than we ever intended. My husband has been with us for 5 months straight now. I'm almost hesitant to post in the happy endings section because this whole process has put a burden on us financially and since my husband can't work (imagine a Sub-Saharan male staying home with a child, not earning his own money, but still being pressured by his family back home) there is a lot of tension and a lot of "disagreements."

I also have to say that once the baby came 3.5 years ago, our cultural differences became more evident. Also, living in a third country, where we spent the first years of our marriage and pay was good and expenses were minimal, was not a good insight to life together in the US. But we are both committed to making this marriage work. The good times are good. The ugly times are fleeting.

I know it won't be the answer to all our problems, but once my husband can work, I know that many of our issues will be resolved. I know who he is when he is working. He is magnetic. When he isn't working, he's a bear.

[katie & sifa 25]

I know it won't be the answer to all our problems, but once my husband can work, I know that many of our issues will be resolved. I know who he is when he is working. He is magnetic. When he isn't working, he's a bear.

Yes, it is really hard for my husband to be home all day while I'm at work too. I know he hates not being able to contribute since he has worked his whole life and always supported himself...and now he's stuck at home. I'm really hoping for the EAD/green card sooooon! At least then he can start looking

[S&S 1]

we have been married 5 years now! Very happy. Of course every union has it's ups and downs but i can't really say i have any major complaints. We get along very well. We have a beautiful 1 year old son and another child on the way wishing everyone the best and i am greatful to God to be able to post in this section.

[PurpleSky 19]

[/i](trying to break up the italics and go back to regular font. Let's see if it works. )

It's very encouraging to see all these works in progress. Thanks to all of you for posting!! I am finding this thread VERY helpful especially when considering what to look out for so I can prepare beforehand as much as possible.

Edited June 3, 2010 by PurpleSky

[Ama&yaw 1]

Hey guys! I thought i would contribute my happiness!I metmy husband here in the US. He was here on a student visa...anyways he is SOOO absolutly wonderful to me and my kids. He does so much for us and is a huge help. Never could i have imagined God to bless me with a better husband!

The AOS process is a little stressful for him though. He use to work before but once we started the AOS he had to stop and now he is soo restless. He cleans the house spotless almost everyday, does the lundry, cleans the cars, fixes little things around the house! He feels that since he isnt working he should contribute by cleaning. He even offers to cook every night if i would just leave him directions! Haha. I leave the cooking up to me any my mom though! The good thing is we expedited his EAD and the card has been ordered! We are just waiting for the hard copy so he can accept a few jobs he has lined up! God is sooo good!

He is such a wonderful kind hearted man. I hear of some of the others waiting on their loved ones from Ghana and I can't imagine being without my husband! I hope everyone can stay strong and be reunited soon!

[Cheyemo 8]

Hey guys! I thought i would contribute my happiness!I metmy husband here in the US. He was here on a student visa...anyways he is SOOO absolutly wonderful to me and my kids. He does so much for us and is a huge help. Never could i have imagined God to bless me with a better husband!

The AOS process is a little stressful for him though. He use to work before but once we started the AOS he had to stop and now he is soo restless. He cleans the house spotless almost everyday, does the lundry, cleans the cars, fixes little things around the house! He feels that since he isnt working he should contribute by cleaning. He even offers to cook every night if i would just leave him directions! Haha. I leave the cooking up to me any my mom though! The good thing is we expedited his EAD and the card has been ordered! We are just waiting for the hard copy so he can accept a few jobs he has lined up! God is sooo good!

He is such a wonderful kind hearted man. I hear of some of the others waiting on their loved ones from Ghana and I can't imagine being without my husband! I hope everyone can stay strong and be reunited soon!

This is so sweet! Sounds like God blessed you with a wonderful husband.