What do you think? Marriage Fraud?? Help!!!

[LearningLesson 8]

I married my husband after being friends so I thought with him for almost 3 years by way of phone and internet. He was very nice and humble and we had great communication and never argued. I went to Jamaica and visited him and he took me to meet his family and introduced me to a few of his friends. We had been discussing getting married and being together for a while. I married him and was down there with him for almost a month. When I came home I started on the paper work for both him and my step daughter. He never had a lot of money so I never really asked for help with the process but he never offered to help either. When we were married he never invited anyone in his family to come to the wedding not even his daughter who was 15 at the time. I was the one who told her that we had gotten married cause he never mentioned it to her after we got back to the house. After they came to america almost a year after we were married everything was fine for the first few months then he begin to change. He went from being sweet and humble to mean and arrogant. He talks disrespectfully to me and his daughter and gets upset when I respond back to him in the same manner. I have caught him on the internet having conversations with both women and transsexual men. He gave me some dumb excuse like he was just playing?? I helped him get a job and a car even bought him a gps so that he could get around. When he started getting his money at first I never asked him to help with bills and again he never offered. So after a month or two I told him to start paying one bill, he did. Now the whole time he has been here he has not bought his daughter anything and anytime she needs something he tells her to ask me. I have no problem doing anything for her but I don't want to be taken advantage of either. He texted me one day and told me that he was going to be staying late for work and I said ok.. Well then his job called our house phone and told me that when he left he forgot to leave a key. I called him and didn't get a answer then texted and asked was he busy, he then called me back and said he was a little busy. I asked was he still at work and he said yes, that when I told him that his job had just called and asked about a key he took. Then he hung up on me and called his job and was asking them to lie for him. I know this because his job had me still on the other line and I heard the whole conversation. He doesn't like doing things with me and his daughter as a family and we argue all the time. After us hitting the 2 year mark of marriage he finally decides to leave the marriage for good and left his daughter with me. He has not been the same person I knew before since he got comfortable in america. He talks bad about american people because of the Jamaicans he has met here put things in his head. But this american has helped him more than anyone he knows. He then started taping our arguments but only the part where I cuss him out for talking to me crazy which I think he is trying to pull the whole abusive U.S Citizen Spouse thing to be able to waive me needing to be there for the removal conditions. I have been going through hell with this man and he is trying to make it seem as though he is the victim. I have had to leave my house in the middle of the night one time because he threatened to kill us all. Himself the daughter and me. She is scared of him and even though it is her dad she doesn't want to live with him! Any advice???

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

You married on your first meeting after being friends? How quickly did things turn romantic?

When he threatened to kill you, why didn't you call the cops?

[LearningLesson 8]

I did call the cops but I only talked to one on the phone and they suggested me leaving and us going to counselling if I didn't want to press charges on him. I left... and my step daughter and I went to my parent house. I was not trying to get him arrested I just didn't want to be threatened and sleep in the house with someone who just made that threat. They never made a report just talked to me over the phone and gave me advice.

[Pinkrlion 2,607]

Get a restraining order, have him evicted from the home, send his daughter back home, and file for divorce.

[LearningLesson 8]

My step daughter doesn't have anyone but him, right now he is not even talking to her because he thinks she has taken my side. When really she is upset with him for her own reasons.. I don't want her to have to go back with him and she is almost 18. She is scared of him and I fear for her going back to Jamaica she cannot take care of herself. I cannot get a restraining order because she is here.

[christeen 966]

Being a jerk of a guy is not the same as being fraud.... He can file for removal of conditions without you based on good faith marriage so no reason to pull the VAWA abusive spouse thing... Send his daughter back, divorce and change the locks if it is your house... As I can see, it is more if a case of him being an a$$h0le not fraudster... Sorry but time to pick up,the pieces and start fresh.

[LearningLesson 8]

I think it's more than being a jerk when you pretend to be someone else other than the person you really are to get someone to marry you. Then after you come to the states you all of a sudden change. For you to act like you are in love with someone to get what u want is more than being a jerk I think. Soon as he gets here is was on the internet chatting with people trying to hook up with them. I could be wrong but it seems like fraud to me. That's why I wanted different peoples perspective... Thanks for your thoughts on the matter

[belinda63 2,981]

Really what does it matter if it is fraud or he is a jerk? File for divorce, get a restraining order, and decide what to do about the daughter. He can ROC with a divorce waiver although it sounds like he doesn't know this and is setting you up for domestic violence charges.

[Boiler 43,434]

Really what does it matter if it is fraud or he is a jerk? File for divorce, get a restraining order, and decide what to do about the daughter. He can ROC with a divorce waiver although it sounds like he doesn't know this and is setting you up for domestic violence charges.

I agree the only person who would know id him and he is not saying.

[Pinkrlion 2,607]

When does she turn 18? She can make her own decision of what she wants to do, she will be her own legal guardian. That is really irrelevent to your safety. You are asking if its fraud, there is no way to know because you werent acting like partners in a marriage, where everything is 50/50. He took on a dfferent role and you allowed him. Also, you already had clues that it wasn't up and up when u got married in JA?

[LearningLesson 8]

She will be 18 in March, and about the financial part of everything he didn't have the money to go 50/50 with me on things in the beginning, I knew that. As far as knowing everything wasn't on the up and up I didn't know that or I would have never married him. He didn't invite his daughter to the wedding I felt that was odd. Other than that he was a completely different person so there was no way to know. I never seen this side of him now until he got here. My stepdaughter said she wanted to warn me about him but couldn't. I know I have gotten myself into a situation I never thought I would be in. But who knows what peoples intentions are until they show them. Thanks for taking interest and I appreciate all the feed back

[sheldonsgirl 19]

All I can say is that there's no way I would have someone living in my house that would say they want to kill me.

[rlogan 2,036]

He didn't invite his daughter to the wedding I felt that was odd.

My stepdaughter said she wanted to warn me about him but couldn't.

That's what a con man is going to do: Keep people from getting together and comparing notes.

It's too late. He got in. You don't have evidence that is going to interest immigration authorities. You have to just get on with your life. Divorce him and move on.

[LearningLesson 8]

All I can say is that there's no way I would have someone living in my house that would say they want to kill me.

He doesn't live with me anymore

[CowBoE 429]

He didn't change. He was acting all alone for the big prize (Green Card).

The sooner you get rid of off him, the sooner you can start a new life.