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Ju&Mike

How to prepare to moving - Savings, plans, steps

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Brazil
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Hi everyone!!

So, I was reading this thread 

Cause it's something that really worries me... We applied for the k1 (yeah... I know.... and as many of us here, I wasn't aware of the many, many cons), and we are waiting for the NOA2.

I'm the beneficiary, and I worked all my adult life. A lot.

Also, I've been married before. I got married very young (first year of college) and earned my financial independence over the years, as I grew professionally. So, it was a natural course spliting the bills and life costs. It's really hard to see myself having to go back on those...

 

As I was reading the recommendations, I was thinking:

- How you guys prepared financially and professionally for the moving? Did the beneficiary had savings? 

The schools, hobbies, and all that, have costs. I don't feel comfortable doing those things on the expenses of my fiance... And I think that could be a very stressful issue for us. Specially not knowing how long it will take to have my EA...

- Did the moving changed the dynamic of the relationship? In terms of the petitioner feeling overwhelmed to support the spouse for, maybe, years, or the beneficiary feeling trapped because of the limitations

- Is there anything I should be aware or could do in advance to prepare myself to a better and easier transition? I'm a very independent woman, and I think would be really hard to have to rely on my fiance for every little thing...

- Has the "money talk" been stressfull during the AOS time? What usually are the expectations of the petioner (asking in terms of cultural differences)? Like, is expected the one staying at home doing all house work, cooking, cleaning?

 

Sorry for the long post. Of course I've talked with my fiance about all of that many times. But it's hard to know the reality before living it.

So, any advices and sharing experiences are very welcomed!!

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Brazil
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@TBoneTX

I don't even know how to start thanking you for all this!!!

There are not enough words to express my gratitude! Just want to say that I'm touched by the time you took and the effort you put on answering my questions! 

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Order 5 originals; you'll need them

Had no idea!! Good to know! Specially cause we intend to get married in LA and live in NY... So, it coukd be a pain having his family getting the extra copies for us down the road...

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Qualify for a U.S. driver's license as soon as possible when you arrive.  Before you emigrate, renew your Brazilian license for the longest term possible.

We don't have a car where my fiance lives (cause, you know, NYC). But that would be very helpful for road trips and when visiting his family in LA. I drove a few times and also rented cars in USA before with my brazilian driver license. I have to renew this year and they are valid for 5 years... So, I think I will be fine.

- Another thing... I read at some posts here that people have problems applying for the license before having a SSN. Should I apply before getting married? Under my K1 visa?

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

If your passport is remotely within expiration time, renew it before your consular interview, so that the visa can be put into a fresh passport

But, my K1 will only be valid before getting married, right? After that I lose the status of non-immigrant and stay in a "limbo" until my greencard is issued, right? Am I missing something here?

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Regardless of how cosmopolitan you are or how many times you may have visited the U.S., things are eye-opening.

During the pandemic I spent 8 months (4 in 2020 and 4 in 2021) with him there, with my B1 visa. So, I'm a little more aware of the costs of living. I helped him moving apartments and with a job transition, so, I know the costs of rent, utilities, transportation, groceries, going out, etc. But I'm aware there are much more to know and understand. I have no idea of medical costs, taxes, bank fees, home mantainance. 

Another thing that I need to educate myself about is how to invest money, since my fiance is pretty inexperienced on this field, as well.

It feels overwherlming trying to understand USA financial, medical and law system all at once!!!

Sao Paulo, where I live, although being a relatively cheap city for USC, due to money conversion rate, its a pretty expensive city, even for high paying jobs in Brazil. So, I'm not, at all, blinded to the hardships of making a comfortable life in USA. That said, I'm humble enough to admit that there's so much more that I'm still not aware!!

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Investigate which local banks will be willing to place you jointly on your new husband's account before you have a Social Security Number.

He already did that. Apparently his current bank just ask for utility bill on my name to open a joint account.

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Such things as dental/medical visits differ vastly between the U.S. and South America.  

That is one of the things that scaries me the most! Here I have an excelent heath care. And I can consult with specialist of every field, if I desire to. I fear I get sick in USA and don't have access to proper treatment. My fiance said he's gonna look to put me under his medical from the company he works for. But still... all the primary doctor thing that you have to consult and paying some parts out of your pocket is really hard for me to understand and figure out how to navigate.... Do you know where can I educate myself about health insurance?

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Your fiancé (or you) should look (even starting now) for Brazilian or Portuguese-speaking communities or groups near you.

 Thank you for this advice. Usually I'm a little reluctant to reach out to other brazilians in USA, cause I've felt before they have some resistance on welcoming me... Maybe because I hang out way more with USC when I'm there (my fiance friends), ans brazilians tend, on my perception, to have cliques and not being very open to integrate to the american culture. But, I'll keep my mind open to search for brazilian groups, cause I'm 100% positive I'll need help adjusting.

I've alredy found some very affordable brazilian restaurants and brazilian products at the supermarkets near where my fiance lives, so that's def a plus. Cause even when I'm there for a short period, I really miss the brazilian food.

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Here are two helpful, even crucial, resources to look at in regard to U.S. law

That is beyond helpful!! Gonna start reading today!!

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Sherlock Holmes while you're doing so

Hahahaha... love that! I guess I really have some research to do. I found hard to find free or even cheap classes to do in NYC. The only activitie I engaged the times I was there, was the gym.... But I'm not a gym person. Hard to think of spending hours or making friends there... ahahah 

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

reasonably inexpensive attorney who will draft Wills, Powers of Attorney, and other estate documents for each of you

What do you consider a inexpensive attorney, if I might ask? Cause my fiance never used a lawer for anything. He has no idea of reasonably fees or even where to look for one. Trust looks to be another issue when it comes to attorney as well... I've heard so many stories of people being deceived by them in USA. (I have a law degree in Brazil, and here things are a bit different.. that's why I get so confused....

 

14 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

much will depend on whether your fiancé/husband is a typical American guy or is a naturalized citizen from another country/culture

He is american born and raised, but comes from a Mexican immigrant family (he's first generation). He lives by himself since college, so he knows his way around house duties. Whenever we are togheter, here in Brazil or there, he helps me with the housekeeping. But, we were always working, so made sense.

I wonder, since I'm gonna be unemployed until my EAD arrives, if would be expected me being the typical house wife.

But he is far from the latino macho, so I think we will be good!!

Edited by Ju&Mike
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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
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4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

we intend to get married in LA

Ufff... I understand from reading here that it can take "forever" to receive marriage certificates.  Maybe ask his local family there to check into it.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

that would be very helpful

A driver's license is indispensable, for identification if nothing else.  If Nueva York (is that what it is in Portuguese, too, like Spanish) State issues driver's licenses to illegal aliens, then you with your legal status should have no trouble, even without a Social Security Number.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

my K1 will only be valid before getting married, right? After that I lose the status of non-immigrant and stay in a "limbo" until my greencard is issued, right? Am I missing something here?

I meant that your Brazilian passport should be as fresh as possible; sorry.  As for the K-1 itself, it's "dead on arrival" at port of entry, and then you're in a "period of authorized stay" as long as you marry within the 90 days thereafter.  Be sure to file for AOS as soon as you receive at least one marriage certificate.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

I spent 8 months (4 in 2020 and 4 in 2021) with him there

Oh, this is a wonderful background.  Just remember that "living" someplace new is different from visiting, even if it was for extended periods.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

medical costs, taxes, bank fees, home mantainance

Medical costs are never transparent; they're always hidden, or masked by what insurance covers and what it doesn't, and "co-pays," etc.  It gives lifelong Americanos a headache!  Many people with simple taxes can calculate them themselves, and those who can't or don't want to will hire a Certified Public Accountant (CPA).  Bank fees are usually posted or mailed to people.  As for home maintenance, I was fortunate that Mrs. T-B. worked the Spanish-speaking avenue to find us Mexicanos, Salvadoreños, and even Ecuatorianos to do our projects well and very cheaply in comparison to gringos.  In fact, one of our Ecuatoriano handymen is now a very good friend.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

I'm humble enough to admit that there's so much more that I'm still not aware!!

There's always something more to learn, even for native-born gringos. :) 

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

his current bank just ask for utility bill on my name to open a joint account.

Outstanding!  In addition, get on his credit-card accounts as an "authorized user" to help build U.S. credit in your name.  There are many threads on this in this forum and possibly in the Tax & Finances forum.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

he's gonna look to put me under his medical from the company he works for

This would be optimal.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

all the primary doctor thing that you have to consult and paying some parts out of your pocket is really hard for me to understand and figure out how to navigate.... Do you know where can I educate myself about health insurance?

It's confusing for many gringos, too!  It depends on his health plan.  Read his policy, or have him summarize the main points.  For example, one plan might have you "co-pay" $40 for a general doctor visit and $80 for a specialist visit; x-rays and blood tests would be included, but injections and medical procedures would not.  Confusing, but in general you'd end up ahead in comparison with paying everything yourself.  Prescriptions might be $3 each, or $10 each, or $50 each for the fancy medicines.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

I'll keep my mind open to search for brazilian groups, cause I'm 100% positive I'll need help adjusting.

If you find a Brazilian church in Nueva York, go, even if you're not religious, to make contacts.  I dropped Mrs. T-B. at a Spanish-speaking church for 3 Sundays in a row, and she met several nice people that started her social network.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

I found hard to find free or even cheap classes

Well, perhaps a church or social agency has ideas.  Your English is very good, but it wouldn't hurt to take a class... where you'd probably also make friends.  As far as the gym:  "If I'm healthy enough to exercise, I'm healthy enough NOT to." :P 

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

What do you consider a inexpensive attorney

A dead one. :lol:   Check around for estate/probate attorneys (probably not the ones who advertise a lot).  What you want is a full set of estate documents for both of you, valid for Nueva York State.  I don't know of prices in Nueva York,  but any lawyer in the state could draft the documents for you.  Maybe call around to lawyers in smaller towns in central (upstate) Nueva York State?  They might be less expensive.

4 hours ago, Ju&Mike said:

he helps me with the housekeeping

Yes -- a first-generation child is probably far enough removed from machismo that you're safe.  I'm not worried about you.

 

Ask more about anything, and I'll think up some good "lawyer" jokes, because you are one. :P 

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
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2 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

good "lawyer" joke

Here is one, and then back to topic:

 

A man poked his head into a lawyer's office, and said, "How much do you charge for a consultation?"

"$900 for three questions," said the lawyer, without looking up.

"$900?!  Isn't that a lot for just three questions?" said the man.

"I don't think so," said the lawyer.  "And what is your third question?"

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Brazil
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3 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Maybe ask his local family there to check into it

Well, based on the time they took to respond our questions about the marriage license, you are probably right!!! His cousin got married there last year. Gonna ask him to get more information about the certificates... That potentially can change our plans.

 

4 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Nueva York

In Portuguese is Nova Iorque. Hahahaha... and the pronunciation is very different. We put a lot of emphasis on the "o" of Nova, and on the "i" of Iorque. I wish I could send an audio record here.. ahahahah...

 

4 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

you with your legal status should have no trouble

Cool. I think that will be my first step then. Having an american document helps a lot for small things. More than ppl realize. I've been asked for my passport more than one time,  to enter bars outside NYC.... And of course I usually don't carry my passport when I go out at night... cause losing it would have been a mess!!!

 

4 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Medical costs are never transparent

I really really struggle with this concept!!! I think will take me a long time to get used to it. 

 

4 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

home maintenance

We gonna be living on rental units for many years, I imagine. I don't think we ever gonna buy a home in Nova Iorque, and moving from there is not on my fiance plans for the next decade, I think. So, I'm not worried about renovations and that. But regular maintenance... a sink that breaks, a wall that has to be painted, water infiltration... I don't know. To be honest I don't even fully understand what is responsability of the tenant and what fall unde the landlord costs.... But, yeah... Mike and me get around very well with spanish and would't be hard to negotiate with latinos contractors. Still, from what I see, services in USA are way more expensive than in Brazil, compared to other things.

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

build U.S. credit in your name

That's also something that I struggle understanding. What are the ways to build credit? Do I have to borrow money and pay back in order to build a credit? Like a loan? Or a lease? Banks won't give me a credit card if I don't have a credit score there, I get. But how I'm supposed to build a credit if I can't do things that builds credits? hahaha... Confusing! What if my fiance didn't have good credit? How would I start buiding my own without his help? 

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Confusing, but in general you'd end up ahead in comparison with paying everything yourself.

Thank you so much on the clarification!

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

f you find a Brazilian church in Nueva York, go, even if you're not religious

That's a great idea. I am not religious. But makes a lot of sense going

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

it wouldn't hurt to take a class

Not at all. I know my english is not bad, and it have improved a lot with the relationship. But there is so much to improve. Specially to correct some grammar mistakes and pronunciation flaws. And to be honest, would be fun to meet people that are also new to USA... Immigrants or not. There is always that feeling of learning new things together. And could be a place to find people to do some NYC tourism with... Since I'm gonna have some (a lot) free time on my hands, without my husband to be, and there are many places I didn't get the chance to visit in the city.

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

"If I'm healthy enough to exercise, I'm healthy enough NOT to

hahahahahahaha... OMG!! Gonna carry this saying with me forever! Thats so me!

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

A dead one

🤣🤣. True!!!

 

5 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Maybe call around to lawyers in smaller towns in central (upstate) Nueva York State

That's actually a great advice!!! Thank you!!

 

3 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

And what is your third question

Hahahahahah!!! We have a similar joke in portuguese! And that's not far from the truth. 😬... Gotta pay all that student loans 😇.

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
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1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

Gonna ask him to get more information about the certificates

Good thinking.  If it sounds like a problem, consider venues within range of L.A. that can accommodate your need for rapid production of the certificates.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

Nova Iorque

Dios mio... and I still need to learn Spanish beyond my ultra-basic abilities to say a few phrases.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

Having an american document helps

This thread explains how I handled Mrs. T-B.'s situation:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/562879-cbp-at-tsa-airport-checkpoints-why-theyre-there-how-best-to-handle/#entry7784682

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

I think will take me a long time to get used to it.

Join the crowd of countless native-born gringos.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

I don't even fully understand what is responsability of the tenant and what fall unde the landlord costs

This will be explained in the rental-lease contracts.  In general, the landlord is typically responsible for prompt repairs to broken or malfunctioning systems, and for general upkeep.  (Where I live, "good" landlords will make periodic visits to ensure that tenants are maintaining the property acceptably.)  Nueva York Nova Iorque tenants may have different rights and responsibilities.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

What are the ways to build credit?

One often-recommended method here is to apply for a "secured" credit card.  Run a search on that here or on the general Web.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

What if my fiance didn't have good credit?

If this is a hypothetical issue, be glad that he has decent credit.  If this is a real issue, he should start now to raise his credit rating in every way possible.  Talk to a financial advisor if necessary.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

I am not religious. But makes a lot of sense going

It was the same with Mrs. T-B.  It helped her to feel more at home; those who attend church tend to be decent people; and even though none of her direct contacts endured as long-term friends, her association with them led to expanding her social circle.

1 hour ago, Ju&Mike said:

There is always that feeling of learning new things together. And could be a place to find people to do some NYC tourism with...

Excellent attitude.  Another idea to increase your social exposure is to get to the many colleges and universities and to spend a day at the Student Center (or International Student Center).

-----

One more idea is to become a dedicated, voracious student of the entire immigration process, through naturalization.  Doing so will aid your medium- and long-term planning.  This thread of mine, from some time back, gives a little perspective:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/410945-k-1-journey-completed/

-----

Perhaps transmit this haiku (original -- I'm proud that my Spanish skills enabled it) to your fiancé, regarding what to expect after you become a citizen:

    Ciudadana --

    Puede esposo joder...

    Americana!

Edited by TBoneTX

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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  • 4 weeks later...
Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Brazil
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Hi Ju! After TBoneTX`s excellent suggestions, I could give you an "insider's" perspective from some who went through this process. The cultural differences, how we managed to arrange the wedding in such short time, how to build credit, the health system... guess what: after almost 40 years of a pretty healthy life, I got sick here and it wasn’t fun. How to not get insane not being able to work and having to be dependent (financially and all other aspects) of someone else. Not to mention the fact that I came from a big city and now I leave in a small rural town - it`s an interesting challenge to maintain your sanity. Anyway, if you want to chat about this in more details, I would be more than happy to talk to you. Just let me know. Good luck! Btw, I'm also Brazilian, so we might have other things in common 😊

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  • 1 month later...
Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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you can read about it here until your eyes pops out, and Im saying there are lots of good advice from here. but if you havent really spent a good amount of time living and working here like 5 years give or take, its tough....

 

the  thing is youre already stressing out before even getting here. its a bad sign in my book.

 

if  you used to having an easy life back home like maids, drivers, then forget it, stay there. 

 

sorry for the rant, but it this is the reality.

 

Im a legal immigrant myself, came from a third  world country. 

 

 

 

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3 hours ago, GinoNiña said:

you can read about it here until your eyes pops out, and Im saying there are lots of good advice from here. but if you havent really spent a good amount of time living and working here like 5 years give or take, its tough....

 

the  thing is youre already stressing out before even getting here. its a bad sign in my book.

 

if  you used to having an easy life back home like maids, drivers, then forget it, stay there. 

 

sorry for the rant, but it this is the reality.

 

Im a legal immigrant myself, came from a third  world country. 

 

 

 

Which 3rd world country?

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Brazil
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On 8/23/2022 at 7:39 AM, GinoNiña said:

you can read about it here until your eyes pops out, and Im saying there are lots of good advice from here. but if you havent really spent a good amount of time living and working here like 5 years give or take, its tough....

 

the  thing is youre already stressing out before even getting here. its a bad sign in my book.

 

if  you used to having an easy life back home like maids, drivers, then forget it, stay there. 

 

sorry for the rant, but it this is the reality.

 

Im a legal immigrant myself, came from a third  world country. 

 

 

 

No need to appologize. I really understand some people go to USA thinking life will be easier. And a lot of times, it is not.

 

So, it's not that I'm stressing out.

I have some valid concerns, as I think everyone moving countries would have.

I don't want just to find out about the struggles "on the go".

I like to be prepared, at least for the more predictable stuff, as I always have been during my life. 

If I can study the problems, discuss them better with my fiance, and take some actions to make the transition easier, why not, right?

I don't think is necessarily a bad sign the fact that I have worries about my financial and professional life moving foward. I think it's a sign that I don't want to be blind sided by all dificulties that I'm gonna face. And I know some of them I will only find out once I face them. But some others can be anticipated.

The fact that I want be very aware of how hard the immigrant life is, I think it's a sign that I'm commited with this whole situation, and I want to build a healthy marriage, where I won't be blaming my fiance for being miserable in his country, and can find ways to contribute to our life together.

 

Yes, I have a comfortable life in Brazil. I'm not rich, and in Brazil is very expensive to have multiple maids, drives, or other luxuries, so I keep my life as simple as possible. Still, I know I have more access to superfluities than I will have in USA, at least in the beginning, and that's something I'm gonna have to deal with... more house work, more commute, less going out for food and drinks, less beauty services (saaaad.. hahaha).

Is it fun? No! Is it some things that I'm willing to compromise to be with my fiance? Yes.

 

We considered him moving to Brazil. Would be a very comfortable life here, with 2 incomes, and lower expenses. But he helps his mom financially, and the loss in his salary moving here would make really hard for him keep helping her. So, for now, it's out of question.

 

Staying here without him is also not an option. We want to build a life together, share a home and everything that comes with marriage. I'm not marring him to have a "better life" in USA. That was never my dream.

But the fact is I fell in love with an American guy and after 3 years traveling both ways frequently, we decided it was time to be at the same country permanently. And after a LOT of talking, we agreed that at this point of our lives, moving to USA would make sense.

 

And here I am, trying my best to be the best partner I can be, not relying on him to figure out everything for me! 

 

I hope that you are doing well in your life there! Wish you all the best!

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
Timeline
14 minutes ago, Ju&Mike said:

I want be very aware of how hard the immigrant life is

Another idea is to look for books that contain advice on how to adapt to a new culture.  Apologies that I'm not aware of any to recommend.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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@Ju&Mike I plan on moving my credit history from Korea to the US once I get an SSN with American Express:

https://www.novacredit.com/

 

Here is a great resource on building credit in the US:

Good luck with your move to the US~ 

Generally, the advice is to apply for your SSN as soon as you arrive in the US and before you get married (arriving K1s are allowed to apply for SSN in the first 60 days).

You might want to sort our your paperwork IN New York (marriage certificate/license) if that is where you are going to live (and you can obtain the certificate same day you marry) and just have a wedding ceremony in LA if your reason for getting married in LA is to be surrounded by family and loved ones.

Post on difficulties of obtaining MC after wedding in LA here:

 

One more thing: You might receive your EAD (work permit) fairly quickly after you file the I-485. There have been reports of people receiving it after 2-3 months... so hopefully you won't be waiting for work for too long. 

Good luck! 

 

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Brazil
Timeline
On 8/26/2022 at 8:35 PM, ROK2USA said:

@Ju&Mike I plan on moving my credit history from Korea to the US once I get an SSN with American Express:

https://www.novacredit.com/

 

Here is a great resource on building credit in the US:

Good luck with your move to the US~ 

Generally, the advice is to apply for your SSN as soon as you arrive in the US and before you get married (arriving K1s are allowed to apply for SSN in the first 60 days).

You might want to sort our your paperwork IN New York (marriage certificate/license) if that is where you are going to live (and you can obtain the certificate same day you marry) and just have a wedding ceremony in LA if your reason for getting married in LA is to be surrounded by family and loved ones.

Post on difficulties of obtaining MC after wedding in LA here:

 

One more thing: You might receive your EAD (work permit) fairly quickly after you file the I-485. There have been reports of people receiving it after 2-3 months... so hopefully you won't be waiting for work for too long. 

Good luck

 

Sorry for the delay! I was on vacation and had my laptop off!! 

Thank you so much for this tips!!!! Can't express enough how helpful this is!!!

 

Hopefuly my EAD comes that fast! would be great!!

 

Good Luck on your process as well!!

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