Dad gets slammed by women after telling them to have kids before they’re 30 because after that ‘90% of your eggs are dead’

[Dashinka 23,289]

14 hours ago, laylalex said:

Is HuffPo a reliable source? Assuming it is, I want to go back to what I was saying about why it is that men like the author of that study think it's appropriate to bark that out to women in general. Women KNOW that there's a window of fertility. Having some rando lecture you about "better start popping them out now, ladies, or you'll regret it" is NOT helping, and it can be very hurtful to women who are trying AND are young and aren't successful. I had multiple miscarriages as a young woman, and that kind of thing can sting. Even though I know I'm better off not having had those children, it doesn't take away from the real hurt I had at the time.

So only women can talk about or discuss women's stuff?  What about those biological males that identify themselves as women?

[Boiler 43,567]

25 minutes ago, Bill & Katya said:

So only women can talk about or discuss women's stuff?  What about those biological males that identify themselves as women?

The level of Gender Assumption is disturbing, not one actually asked.

[yuna628 9,530]

2 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

And what is the birth rate in Japan?  I agree, women should not look at the potential ability to be a mother as her sole value, but also, a woman that does in fact choose that route should not be derided by the "woke" feminists.

A quick google had tons of articles but here's the common statistic.

 

Quote

 

The ministry estimated 921,000 babies will have been born by the end of 2018 – 25,000 fewer than last year and the lowest number since comparable records began in 1899. It is also the third year in a row the number of births has been below one million.

Combined with the estimated number of deaths this year – a postwar high of 1.37 million – the natural decline of Japan’s population by 448,000 is the biggest ever.

The data suggests the government will struggle to reach its goal of raising the birth rate – the average number of children a woman has during her lifetime – to 1.8 by April 2026. The current birth rate stands at 1.43, well below the 2.07 required to keep the population stable. https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/dec/27/japan-shrinking-as-birthrate-falls-to-lowest-level-in-history

 

This is following a trend of a lot of countries, including our own that has a falling birth rate. Statistically it's not just women or even couples choosing not to have kids, or even shortages at clinics in the UK that I mentioned either. It's economic instability for many, but the increasing fact that more and more women are getting diagnosed with reproductive issues that have no easy treatment. Some have linked this to rising obesity levels, exposure to chemicals, and all sorts of things... but even seemingly healthy women are having the same problems.

 

And I also agree, any woman that chooses to have kids or decides a more traditional route shouldn't be derided.. but nor should they be forced to create a life when they simply aren't ready for it. On the plus side, statistically more youth and teenage couples are abstaining in this regard. It seems in the case of many Japanese women interviewed in the original article I read, they enjoyed children and the idea of a family, but it seemed to be long standing cultural or behavioral issues with men not taking a greater interest that put them off. It takes two to make and raise a baby.

[Nature Boy 2.0 8,317]

2 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

So only women can talk about or discuss women's stuff?  What about those biological males that identify themselves as women?

You ever wondred why it's ok for a man to identify as a women , but if a college cafeteria  has Taco Tuesday its cultural appropriation ?

[Dashinka 23,289]

9 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

A quick google had tons of articles but here's the common statistic.

 

This is following a trend of a lot of countries, including our own that has a falling birth rate. Statistically it's not just women or even couples choosing not to have kids, or even shortages at clinics in the UK that I mentioned either. It's economic instability for many, but the increasing fact that more and more women are getting diagnosed with reproductive issues that have no easy treatment. Some have linked this to rising obesity levels, exposure to chemicals, and all sorts of things... but even seemingly healthy women are having the same problems.

 

And I also agree, any woman that chooses to have kids or decides a more traditional route shouldn't be derided.. but nor should they be forced to create a life when they simply aren't ready for it. On the plus side, statistically more youth and teenage couples are abstaining in this regard. It seems in the case of many Japanese women interviewed in the original article I read, they enjoyed children and the idea of a family, but it seemed to be long standing cultural or behavioral issues with men not taking a greater interest that put them off. It takes two to make and raise a baby.

I think the narrative that we get from the militant feminists is that if a women chooses motherhood as a career then she must have been forced to do it.  Identity politics, all women should think alike if you listen to the Left.

1 minute ago, Nature Boy 2.0 said:

You ever wondred why it's ok for a man to identify as a women , but if a college cafeteria  has Taco Tuesday its cultural appropriation ?

Triggered!  Where is my safe space!

[Boiler 43,567]

2 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

A quick google had tons of articles but here's the common statistic.

 

This is following a trend of a lot of countries, including our own that has a falling birth rate. Statistically it's not just women or even couples choosing not to have kids, or even shortages at clinics in the UK that I mentioned either. It's economic instability for many, but the increasing fact that more and more women are getting diagnosed with reproductive issues that have no easy treatment. Some have linked this to rising obesity levels, exposure to chemicals, and all sorts of things... but even seemingly healthy women are having the same problems.

 

And I also agree, any woman that chooses to have kids or decides a more traditional route shouldn't be derided.. but nor should they be forced to create a life when they simply aren't ready for it. On the plus side, statistically more youth and teenage couples are abstaining in this regard. It seems in the case of many Japanese women interviewed in the original article I read, they enjoyed children and the idea of a family, but it seemed to be long standing cultural or behavioral issues with men not taking a greater interest that put them off. It takes two to make and raise a baby.

There are biological factors and societal factors. A lot of these arise because of the assumption there is a win win scenario when there is not, sometimes you have to choose.

 

Sometime back I remember being told by a single individual who identified as female must have been 50 that she was ready to settle down and have a child, now I know better than to say anything. Would this have happened in prior generations, would someone have been a bit more brutal with reality?

 

My mother was 26 and I am the oldest and I think even 26 was considered old then, now it seems 30 plus is the normal, well I seem to recollect reading that. My guess is that if you look deeper into the numbers there are wide variations in age between different elements of society.

 

Societal changes also impact men, which I am not sure you have considered, when you see the divorce rate what it is, you see family and friends etc who have been divorced and basically financially destroyed and the odds seem to be at best 50/50 why is this somewhere you want to go. What would I tell myself if I was 18 again....

 

I had a beer with a friend, well more than one, and he went down his Match.com experiences, worthy of a thread by itself, he had been on it since the early days and had enough stories to fill a book. Anyway he has given it up as a bad job. 

 

[yuna628 9,530]

8 minutes ago, Bill & Katya said:

I think the narrative that we get from the militant feminists is that if a women chooses motherhood as a career then she must have been forced to do it.  Identity politics, all women should think alike if you listen to the Left.

Triggered!  Where is my safe space!

Likewise, on the Right, particularly in religious circles the narrative is that motherhood is a woman's only value and pumping out babies and doing all tasks alone and without complaint. I consider myself a feminist, but do not mind a more traditional role of being a homemaker and mother. Unfortunately medically, babies will be difficult for me, and I am getting older. Friends that have similar issues but managed to have kids successfully give me some hope.. and my mom certainly had kids when told it was statistically and physically impossible. I look to my great-grandmother that enjoyed not only raising her own kids but still having a career doing something she loved the most - caring for children.. and she was not around during the age of 'feminism'.

2 minutes ago, Boiler said:

There are biological factors and societal factors. A lot of these arise because of the assumption there is a win win scenario when there is not, sometimes you have to choose.

 

Sometime back I remember being told by a single individual who identified as female must have been 50 that she was ready to settle down and have a child, now I know better than to say anything. Would this have happened in prior generations, would someone have been a bit more brutal with reality?

 

My mother was 26 and I am the oldest and I think even 26 was considered old then, now it seems 30 plus is the normal, well I seem to recollect reading that. My guess is that if you look deeper into the numbers there are wide variations in age between different elements of society.

 

Societal changes also impact men, which I am not sure you have considered, when you see the divorce rate what it is, you see family and friends etc who have been divorced and basically financially destroyed and the odds seem to be at best 50/50 why is this somewhere you want to go. What would I tell myself if I was 18 again....

 

I had a beer with a friend, well more than one, and he went down his Match.com experiences, worthy of a thread by itself, he had been on it since the early days and had enough stories to fill a book. Anyway he has given it up as a bad job. 

 

  I think everyone would do well, to choose their partner carefully. My mom married at 18! She picked the first guy her brother pushed her to go date. All these years later, do I think some times, does she regret it? I think she might, though would never admit this to me. There is love there, but also a lot of pain. My dad was never the best father or husband and my mom has a personality that I don't necessarily think makes a good calming influence to her husband. My sister didn't marry until she was in her late 30s, they are not a good fit for one another - I grow concerned how he treats her, and feel like if she didn't believe 'divorce' would disappoint her parents, she'd have done it long ago. People deserve to be happy, but some need to face facts that sometimes they made a series of mistakes or bad choices. Maybe divorce as a choice could be more avoidable if people made wiser choices, took more time, waited until things were stable before rushing in, and being absolutely sure. And once married, actually commit to each other in that marriage. That might be silly to think..?

 

I know a woman that just hit 30, and is going through 'baby fever'. She's convinced this is her only worth and laments the string of bad relationships she had. She's single, poor, and is in a spiral of bad decision making. Convinced herself she wants a baby at all costs to the point she'd be willing to go on a ''match.com'' donor type site for a skeerrry back-alley type transaction. I couldn't fathom this nonsense.. it's going to be a disaster.

[Dashinka 23,289]

3 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

Likewise, on the Right, particularly in religious circles the narrative is that motherhood is a woman's only value and pumping out babies and doing all tasks alone and without complaint. I consider myself a feminist, but do not mind a more traditional role of being a homemaker and mother. Unfortunately medically, babies will be difficult for me, and I am getting older. Friends that have similar issues but managed to have kids successfully give me some hope.. and my mom certainly had kids when told it was statistically and physically impossible. I look to my great-grandmother that enjoyed not only raising her own kids but still having a career doing something she loved the most - caring for children.. and she was not around during the age of 'feminism'.

  I think everyone would do well, to choose their partner carefully. My mom married at 18! She picked the first guy her brother pushed her to go date. All these years later, do I think some times, does she regret it? I think she might, though would never admit this to me. There is love there, but also a lot of pain. My dad was never the best father or husband and my mom has a personality that I don't necessarily think makes a good calming influence to her husband. My sister didn't marry until she was in her late 30s, they are not a good fit for one another - I grow concerned how he treats her, and feel like if she didn't believe 'divorce' would disappoint her parents, she'd have done it long ago. People deserve to be happy, but some need to face facts that sometimes they made a series of mistakes or bad choices. Maybe divorce as a choice could be more avoidable if people made wiser choices, took more time, waited until things were stable before rushing in, and being absolutely sure. And once married, actually commit to each other in that marriage. That might be silly to think..?

 

I know a woman that just hit 30, and is going through 'baby fever'. She's convinced this is her only worth and laments the string of bad relationships she had. She's single, poor, and is in a spiral of bad decision making. Convinced herself she wants a baby at all costs to the point she'd be willing to go on a ''match.com'' donor type site for a skeerrry back-alley type transaction. I couldn't fathom this nonsense.. it's going to be a disaster.

Yes, there are religions/countries that are very bad for women.

[Boiler 43,567]

31 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

Likewise, on the Right, particularly in religious circles the narrative is that motherhood is a woman's only value and pumping out babies and doing all tasks alone and without complaint. I consider myself a feminist, but do not mind a more traditional role of being a homemaker and mother. Unfortunately medically, babies will be difficult for me, and I am getting older. Friends that have similar issues but managed to have kids successfully give me some hope.. and my mom certainly had kids when told it was statistically and physically impossible. I look to my great-grandmother that enjoyed not only raising her own kids but still having a career doing something she loved the most - caring for children.. and she was not around during the age of 'feminism'.

  I think everyone would do well, to choose their partner carefully. My mom married at 18! She picked the first guy her brother pushed her to go date. All these years later, do I think some times, does she regret it? I think she might, though would never admit this to me. There is love there, but also a lot of pain. My dad was never the best father or husband and my mom has a personality that I don't necessarily think makes a good calming influence to her husband. My sister didn't marry until she was in her late 30s, they are not a good fit for one another - I grow concerned how he treats her, and feel like if she didn't believe 'divorce' would disappoint her parents, she'd have done it long ago. People deserve to be happy, but some need to face facts that sometimes they made a series of mistakes or bad choices. Maybe divorce as a choice could be more avoidable if people made wiser choices, took more time, waited until things were stable before rushing in, and being absolutely sure. And once married, actually commit to each other in that marriage. That might be silly to think..?

 

I know a woman that just hit 30, and is going through 'baby fever'. She's convinced this is her only worth and laments the string of bad relationships she had. She's single, poor, and is in a spiral of bad decision making. Convinced herself she wants a baby at all costs to the point she'd be willing to go on a ''match.com'' donor type site for a skeerrry back-alley type transaction. I couldn't fathom this nonsense.. it's going to be a disaster.

The only thing you can be sure about is death, so wait until you are dead?

 

I think the common term is baby rabies and yes one of those things like many others I did not understand but now sort of do.

 

So she in her 30's ignored some no doubt good guys she could have had a relationship with, preferred the bad boys, probably her picture on Match whatever is missing a few pounds, well sure, life brought her to where she is and any sensible bloke should run as fast as he can.

[TBoneTX 43,184]

46 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

if people made wiser choices

Fact is, we get more advice on how to buy a washing machine or a car than we do on picking a mate.

3 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

What about those biological males that identify themselves as women?

They're playing women's sports and are thus too busy to talk.

[Nature Boy 2.0 8,317]

55 minutes ago, Bill & Katya said:

Yes, there are religions/countries that are very bad for women.

and oddly enough Liberals rush to defend some of those Relgions

[yuna628 9,530]

14 minutes ago, Boiler said:

The only thing you can be sure about is death, so wait until you are dead?

 

I think the common term is baby rabies and yes one of those things like many others I did not understand but now sort of do.

 

So she in her 30's ignored some no doubt good guys she could have had a relationship with, preferred the bad boys, probably her picture on Match whatever is missing a few pounds, well sure, life brought her to where she is and any sensible bloke should run as fast as he can.

 Baby rabies? LOL good term, and yep. Pretty much. Am so scared for her, but won't be reasoned with.

[laylalex 7,249]

4 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

There is nothing wrong at all with posting this thread, but as @Boiler said, it is biology vs. feminism.  Some women may actually believe this, but for some reason women that want to be a mom as a career are looked down upon by those supposedly more enlightened or progressive.  Having kids is not for everyone certainly, but for those that do really want them, they should do their biological research.

See, I was raised to be a feminist by my parents, though I can't say I'm always a good one (whatever that means!). And my mom in particular made it clear to me that the feminist position (at least in the 90s when I was a kid) was that as long as a woman is making a free choice to lead her life as she wishes, then her path is just as valid as any other. That meant being a housewife (which I was, for quite a while) was okay, as long as I chose it and wanted to pursue it. The "feminists" (I put that in quotes on purpose) who say otherwise, and say that only a woman who is working, only a woman who chooses not to have children, is a good feminist are full of it. They may get a lot of attention because their viewpoint is jarring and offensive to many (I think we can all agree that people who shout terrible things in Loud Voices get heard), but it is NOT a mainstream feminist point of view. Please don't take the viewpoints of some fringey weirdos as mainstream in feminism. After all, it would be silly to say that all Republicans are like that MAGAbomber who was just put away in prison.

[laylalex 7,249]

4 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

So only women can talk about or discuss women's stuff?  What about those biological males that identify themselves as women?

No, but men who are just provocateurs like this guy, and just want to get people upset by making blanket statements should not be surprised when people get upset.

 

Not to be rude, but your second question is just silly and I suspect meant to get some dander up.  The question is more rightly probably about trans men, who have not transitioned.

[Dashinka 23,289]

6 minutes ago, laylalex said:

See, I was raised to be a feminist by my parents, though I can't say I'm always a good one (whatever that means!). And my mom in particular made it clear to me that the feminist position (at least in the 90s when I was a kid) was that as long as a woman is making a free choice to lead her life as she wishes, then her path is just as valid as any other. That meant being a housewife (which I was, for quite a while) was okay, as long as I chose it and wanted to pursue it. The "feminists" (I put that in quotes on purpose) who say otherwise, and say that only a woman who is working, only a woman who chooses not to have children, is a good feminist are full of it. They may get a lot of attention because their viewpoint is jarring and offensive to many (I think we can all agree that people who shout terrible things in Loud Voices get heard), but it is NOT a mainstream feminist point of view. Please don't take the viewpoints of some fringey weirdos as mainstream in feminism. After all, it would be silly to say that all Republicans are like that MAGAbomber who was just put away in prison.

They do seem to get a lot of attention from the Left Wing Media.

 

4 minutes ago, laylalex said:

No, but men who are just provocateurs like this guy, and just want to get people upset by making blanket statements should not be surprised when people get upset.

 

Not to be rude, but your second question is just silly and I suspect meant to get some dander up.  The question is more rightly probably about trans men, who have not transitioned.

Yes, the second question is silly, but that is our society now, silliness is pervasive.