Wife cheated on me, I'm on a conditional green card.

[blahblahblog 36]

federal stuff , the I-864 guidelines,

have nothing to do with

state stuff, for divorce guidelines.

sorry.

in states that allow alimony and/or spousal support, such as california, the case is adjudicated either before a judge or terms are agreed between the two parties prior to the divorce hearing.

if the OP wants some control on things, he should file as the petitioner in the divorce.

That's more complicated. Washington disagrees in part with you (http://www.pugetsoundlegal.net/2014/08/05/washington-court-hold-no-i-864-alimony/), and NJ disagrees fully: http://www.einhornharris.com/familylawblog/alimony-or-no-alimony/. More discussion here http://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2192275.

[nitrous_guy 23]

Well, you might need a lawyer for your divorce, they can really help explain to you the laws in California and guide you through the likelihood of things happening. I would ignore most of the comments related to that because it can be a complex issue and one that depends on how so many things progress. For the moment, you owe her nothing and she is being manipulative by trying to get you to pay things you don't owe. If you are both jointly on a lease together, than that is your financial obligation right now. If you file for separation/divorce immediately, you won't be liable for any more marital debt that she incurs past that point without you. I suggest you get on that.

As to ROC - I would just gather as much as you can, counseling paperwork sounds like a good idea. Plenty of people have divorced and filed ROC on their own. There was a Scandinavian poster recently, also living in your state, who had the exact same situation.

They are BOTH responsible for the JOINT lease, not just him

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

Thank you so much guys. This is great.

Is there a big risk of the permanent green card to be rejected even though I'm in the right here ?

Getting a lawyer, even for divorce is not an option right now.

There is a small risk, but it shouldn't concern you too much.

If not a lawyer, I would get off visa journey and find a DIY legal guide to divorce in your state. Without a lawyer and some really good understanding, I am afraid she will try and screw you over as it seems she is already doing.

http://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-divorce.htm

They are BOTH responsible for the JOINT lease, not just him

Well, duh, but if they were sued by a landlord it might not work out 50/50 as to whose assets were being seized.

[hari29 24]

Thank you so much guys. This is great.

Is there a big risk of the permanent green card to be rejected even though I'm in the right here ?

Getting a lawyer, even for divorce is not an option right now.

Please ignore most comments here. People are saying things that they think is common sense. NOT the law. First of all, before you even think of divorce, get the conditions removed from your greencard. All you have to prove is that you guys have been married for 2 years. That you have plenty of evidence of. Get this done ASAP.

As for your divorce is concerned, Its very complicated. Consult a lawyer. If you cant, go to www.avvo.com and post your questions there. Attorneys will answer your questions for free. You can even pick one of them for your divorce consultations further. People's individual comments are not the best way. Get advice from an attorney.

[Cali&Safi 3]

A piece of advise, especially if you see an attorney. Get pics of her and her male friends, keep notes of her drunkenness and high times. Write everything down, this may even make a difference if USCIS gives you issues of your relationship, It will show its all on her, the one who would not keep her vows, etc. etc.

Also. she can NOT make you pay her deposit on an apartment, ask here where is it written. Don't let her con you into it or anything else.

Sorry your going through this, been at this end too, and it stinks .....

Good luck ....

[smp2010 0]

You need to get some form of proof that she was cheating, a private investigator can get what you need. That will help you in nullifying alimony. Also get a proven immigration attorney to help you get the status straight with your green card. there is nothing that says you have to stay married to what sounds like a borderline personality nutter. Life in America is also about the pursuit of happiness not the prison of a horrible abusive marriage. My prayers for you brother. If you need a link or two just ask, there are plenty of support areas for someone like yourself.

[RightClicK 17]

Ok everyone, I'm not attacking anyone here so no one misunderstand my tone, many of you guys are trying to help but your mixing lots of things up.

Here is the thing. If you signed the contract for your current apartment alone then you are fully obligated to pay that rent your self, if she signed with you then 50/50. In both situations if you can't pay for it and you can't financially support your self, she will have to pay all that but its a long process and a pain the butt to get her or whoever sponsored you to pay for it because you will take them to court but its still an OPTION!!!

Her threatening you of paying for her apartment and s***t, Tell her to do w/e she can do and let me tell you this, She can't do anything unless she divorces you and then the judge decides IF she gets your place or half of it n same for car n money or not. Your wife is obviously from a certain type of women and judges knows them very well i promise, they are at the courts everyday, my opinion she won't be getting so much if none specially because you don't have kids.

Now pay attention to this : If your wife got pregnant she will say its yours. I would not TOUCH her anyways for 2 reasons 1- disease 2- So she wouldn't get pregnant. If she got pregnant from YOU !!!, YOUR SCREWED SIR....and if she just got pregnant tell her sweet then get DNA test..pretty easy and then she will be in a BIG TROUBLE because thats a proof she cheated on you and you won't pay child support and she won't take your house for sure.

What you need to do now is to stay calm, patient and cold like an ice, let her stay with you( if you have a friend, keep him close if you have an enemy keep him closer) ...If she went far from you, you won't be able to know much about her, keep her close and gather evidence, record conversations, take pictures of her with other guys, I would even act like am ok with it even if she wants a threesome and take pictures of them.

Your wife will most likely either get pregnant or get a disease, Im not a psychic but trust me i know, just wait for it, she will make the mistake and then she will totally change with you and will be so nice and will say sorry and s***t again because she messed up, DON'T fall for it but play it along.

I wouldn't go and divorce her now, the more time you have with her, the more proof you have on her and the more proof you have for the greencard self petition.

Your wife won't divorce you, You make good money, she aint worried about no bills or food or anything, she seems to be the type that doesn't work and want yo just drink or do w/e and enjoy life so just suck it up for now for your own good, she NEEDS you, The more she is threatening you, the more scared of you she is, don't show her that your up to anything, stay upset but don't show any weakness because there is no reason !!! .... even if she thought about divorcing to get money, she knows that most likely your will renew your green card on your own and the little money she will get will be spent and she will have nothing...you DON'T have kids so she won't try to get child support to spend on her self till your kid is 18 so she would loose you, your place, food, everything basically then she will have to work or something.

Man, you are in the strong situation, gather your proof and have patience.

[NYCBirdie 0]

I am surprised as to why no one seem to notice a glaringly obvious problem with OP's situation, and keeps talking about the divorce mostly!!

Someone correct me if I am wrong, but OP has been married for 2.5 years. He should have removed condition about half a year ago. As I understand, if you receive your GC after the second wedding anniversary, then it's no longer conditional and its a full 10 yr gc. However, if you receive your gc before the 2nd anniversary, then three months before the second anniversary, you file the removal of condition, and then you get a new 10 yr GC. As I understand, OP has probably made a mistake in that department by not removing the conditions about six months ago and might be in trouble already over it. OP, forget about rent, divorce, infidelity and check upon this matter asap. If all is well, then of course you divorce like any normally jilted, cheated upon spouse and don't let your cheating spouse take advantage of you. You don't owe her rent, or deposit or any such thing just because she said so. It's for the court to decide. California is a communal property state, so a 50/50 division of marital assets is generally done, but considering she sponsored you for gc, she must have some good financial standing of her own.

I THINK YOU SHOULD HAVE ROC'ed SIX MONTHS AGO, SOMEONE CORRECT ME IF I AM WRONG.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

I am surprised as to why no one seem to notice a glaringly obvious problem with OP's situation, and keeps talking about the divorce mostly!!

Someone correct me if I am wrong, but OP has been married for 2.5 years. He should have removed condition about half a year ago. As I understand, if you receive your GC after the second wedding anniversary, then it's no longer conditional and its a full 10 yr gc. However, if you receive your gc before the 2nd anniversary, then three months before the second anniversary, you file the removal of condition, and then you get a new 10 yr GC. As I understand, OP has probably made a mistake in that department by not removing the conditions about six months ago and might be in trouble already over it.

I THINK YOU SHOULD HAVE ROC'ed SIX MONTHS AGO, SOMEONE CORRECT ME IF I AM WRONG.

You are wrong.

The expiration date on your conditional greencard is your POE date plus 2 years if you have been married less than 2 years at POE.

If you are still together, then your 90 day window is before that 2 years from POE date.

For example, we were married in October of 2012, POE April of 2013 and filed to remove conditions in January of 2015.

People who are divorced might have different dates for filing, depending on when they divorce during those 2 years.

Edited March 27, 2015 by N-o-l-a

[NYCBirdie 0]

@N-o-l-a

I have no trouble admitting I am wrong, IF I am wrong. Please cite the source of your information. All we are tying to do here is help OP to the best of our abilities, and let's try to provide the best information we have. So please give a link or cite the source.

My source is

http://www.uscis.gov/green-card/after-green-card-granted/conditional-permanent-residence/remove-conditions-permanent-residence-based-marriage

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

@N-o-l-a

I have no trouble admitting I am wrong, IF I am wrong. Please cite the source of your information. All we are tying to do here is help OP to the best of our abilities, and let's try to provide the best information we have. So please give a link or cite the source.

My source is

http://www.uscis.gov/green-card/after-green-card-granted/conditional-permanent-residence/remove-conditions-permanent-residence-based-marriage

And your source states you are wrong.

"You and your spouse must apply together to remove the conditions on your residence by filing Form I-751. You should apply during the 90 days before your second anniversary as a conditional resident. The expiration date on your green card is also the date of your second anniversary as a conditional resident. If you do not apply to remove the conditions in time, you could lose your conditional resident status and be removed from the country."

[RightClicK 17]

Easy on him man, He is just trying to help lol

And your source states you are wrong.

"You and your spouse must apply together to remove the conditions on your residence by filing Form I-751. You should apply during the 90 days before your second anniversary as a conditional resident. The expiration date on your green card is also the date of your second anniversary as a conditional resident. If you do not apply to remove the conditions in time, you could lose your conditional resident status and be removed from the country."

[Teddy B 17,251]

Please ignore most comments here. People are saying things that they think is common sense. NOT the law. First of all, before you even think of divorce, get the conditions removed from your greencard. All you have to prove is that you guys have been married for 2 years. That you have plenty of evidence of. Get this done ASAP.

As for your divorce is concerned, Its very complicated. Consult a lawyer. If you cant, go to www.avvo.com and post your questions there. Attorneys will answer your questions for free. You can even pick one of them for your divorce consultations further. People's individual comments are not the best way. Get advice from an attorney.

This is perhaps the most incorrect piece of advice in this thread and you tell the op to ignore everyone else? If he files for Removal Of Conditions now based on his marriage to his wife still being intact, he would be committing fraud and could end up getting deported and banned. If his marriage is over, which by his own admission it clearly is, then he needs to get divorced and file for the removal of conditions with a divorce waiver.

[Teddy B 17,251]

Today must be Freaky Friday, I can't believe some of the stuff I'm reading in this thread. There is so much incorrect info, I don't know where to start.

[hari29 24]

This is perhaps the most incorrect piece of advice in this thread and you tell the op to ignore everyone else? If he files for Removal Of Conditions now based on his marriage to his wife still being intact, he would be committing fraud and could end up getting deported and banned. If his marriage is over, which by his own admission it clearly is, then he needs to get divorced and file for the removal of conditions with a divorce waiver.

I am sorry Teddy B, but you have no idea what you talking about. A marriage is over only when the divorce is finalized by court, NOT when you or your spouse or Teddy B thinks its over. OP is still married with this wife, doesnt matter if his wife cheated on him or they dont love each other anymore or anything else. So OP can remove the conditions on his greencard provided the law alows him to do so.

Today must be Freaky Friday, I can't believe some of the stuff I'm reading in this thread. There is so much incorrect info, I don't know where to start.

Start from correcting yourself. I agree there are so much incorrect info. Thats why I asked him to ignore everyone and ask the attorneys.