Wife cheated on me, I'm on a conditional green card.

[Cathi 5,609]

Roz,

As my suggest is seek for the lawyer that u gv you or you just remain married for another 7 months. not too long. Think about it it's suffer awhile better than suffer forever ... IF you no longer married to a citizen you may not able to adjust status I suppose. Then unless your current company would sponsor you for work visa to stay back. If I'm not mistaken. Hopefully it works ! All the best. Hang on there.

this is wrong, he can absolutely apply to remove conditions on his own with a divorce waiver. He cannot lie and stay married until it's time to remove conditions with his wife for the sake of getting the green card, it would be visa fraud to do so. There is a divorce waiver for a reason and exactly for situations like this.

As Teddy said this is the most screwed up thread, ever. So many people guessing and giving wrong answers. If people don't know the answer, then just shut up. Seriously.

OP you can 100% file for divorce now and remove conditions now with a divorce waiver. Make sure you gather as much evidence as you can to prove you married in good faith and evidence proving you were indeed living together as a married couple. Do not listen to the advice of people here who are telling you to stay married to your wife and wait until after the 10 year GC is received. Lying to immigration in order to get a green card is what will get you deported. The minute they find out you stayed married just so you can get a green card, game over. Hire a divorce attorney and take care of the divorce FIRST, then you can deal with removing conditions with a waiver. As long as you do things by the book and don;t lie you will not lose your green card. Good luck

[TBoneTX 43,038]

The OP hasn't logged on to VisaJourney since April 1.

[Teddy B 17,251]

Two weeks isn't that long. There are many members that will read this thread for some time to come. I think it bears repeating just how messed up some of the advice being given in this thread is.

[JNC69 0]

this is wrong, he can absolutely apply to remove conditions on his own with a divorce waiver. He cannot lie and stay married until it's time to remove conditions with his wife for the sake of getting the green card, it would be visa fraud to do so. There is a divorce waiver for a reason and exactly for situations like this.

As Teddy said this is the most screwed up thread, ever. So many people guessing and giving wrong answers. If people don't know the answer, then just shut up. Seriously.

OP you can 100% file for divorce now and remove conditions now with a divorce waiver. Make sure you gather as much evidence as you can to prove you married in good faith and evidence proving you were indeed living together as a married couple. Do not listen to the advice of people here who are telling you to stay married to your wife and wait until after the 10 year GC is received. Lying to immigration in order to get a green card is what will get you deported. The minute they find out you stayed married just so you can get a green card, game over. Hire a divorce attorney and take care of the divorce FIRST, then you can deal with removing conditions with a waiver. As long as you do things by the book and don;t lie you will not lose your green card. Good luck

Sincerely apology give on that. Don't have much experience but did not know this is a better way to solve our friend's case. Thank you for sharing! Hopefully he able to go through this. All the best.

[1.618 17]

Consult an immigration attorney. If you are ready to get divorced and it will be finalized by the time it's time to remove conditions, perhaps that's the best route. USCIS scrutinizes more if the petition is not filed jointly, but if you have enough evidence to show that your marriage was entered in good faith, then you do not have to worry. Be ready to either reply to an RFE or perhaps to even attend interview. It can definitely be done, though, as long as the marriage was real and that you do not lie.

If you are separated and remain legally married, do not lie on the application - her address may be different than yours. You may include a statement explaining your current marital situation. You can be separated and file jointly since you are still legally married. There is NOTHING wrong with that. Note that your wife will have to sign off on the application with you if this is the case.

If you want to divorce/file a waiver, just make sure the divorce will be final in time.

[Roz 1]

Wow.

Teddy was right. Theres some Freaky friday stuff going on here and its now Monday for crying out loud!

so first a big apology to the OP for having 3 whole pages of conflicting advice and being very generous in calling it discussion between members. Your question/situation is a very very common asked almost weekly in this area of the forums.

Thank you so much for your advice Damara, it really really helped.

I will start worrying about the divorce first, right now she's still sleeping in my same damn bed. I want this to be over and I don't care what temporarily money I'll lose.

[Roz 1]

Also I wanted to add. I found a text with her admitting that she slept with the guy.

[Roz 1]

I just had a more peaceful talk with the wife.

We agreed to do the divorce together. How can we make this as smooth as possible. She should sign an affidavit for me stating that the marriage was indeed entered in good faith?

[Roz 1]

Ok, false alarm, she's not helping with affadavits.

[Roz 1]

I just spoke to a lawyer on the phone, He said hiring one will cost me around 3000 dollars. I will not be able to pay my soon to be ex wife 3000 dollars then another 3000 for a lawyer, is this possible to do without one? Is it riskier? As I said, I have the proof needed to make the complete package, except for her signing an affidavit.

Im not sure the divorce will be finalized in time, but I will be able to get a decree.

Edited April 23, 2015 by Roz

[bronco37 16]

Get a divorce. Move on. You don't need a lawyer for a bonafide marriage case unless, of course, you have some skeletons in the closet. Based on your OP, you should be able to do it on your own.

You have a job and have admitted on a public forum that you have a great career. I won't be totally wrong if I boldly say that you will not be able to get any alimony out of her. And, I believe, you don't want or need any of that money either.

As far as I-864 goes, winning a case for I-864 support is one thing and getting that money out of someone's pocket in reality is a whole different ballgame in USA. Not to mention,she is a woman and will have a huge leverage in the courts when she files for a false protective order against you in her preparation for the divorce and to bolster her defense against an impending support lawsuit that you may file should you become jobless. I wonder how many judges, state or federal, will compel a supposed victim of domestic abuse pony up cash based on a contract where you are just a secondary beneficiary. I can guarantee you that you will not get a penny out of that woman and high chances are that she will be able to extract every penny out of you unless you are extremely cautious and take immediate preventive measures against widespread abuse of VAWA. And I ain't kiddin'.

Good Luck.

Edited April 23, 2015 by bronco37

[ChicagoSarah 127]

You should be able to file your divorce without a lawyer if thing are amicable and straight-forward. I haven't dealt with divorce in CA, but I did my own (pro se) in IL without issue. But we split everything amicably and didn't have kids/child support/visitation to deal with.

If you've handled the immigration process yourself, the divorce process shouldn't be that much crazier (I did the divorce first and found immigration pretty easy since I was used to government forms and processes!).

[Villanelle 4,121]

Rozzy---

My goodness.

I suppose your thread hasnt been getting much love because there are a few other threads going right now with a bit of drama. You say you work in TV so you know how that goes. People love the drama lol. A cheating spouse just isnt big drama anymore sad as that sounds..

So lets see, your GC is expiring in Nov 2015. You have time. (immigration paperwise)

So, have you looked up info about divorces in CA online? MrsObama provided a link in the thread. I read through a lot of stuff. Way too much to be copying and pasting every little bit.

The lawyer for 3k doesnt sound that bad. CA as a community property state can be a bit tricky to divide assets and debts so it can be helpful to use a lawyer to be sure that it is done correctly- especially if you and the other person are not on the best of terms.

What does sound confusing and crazy is you saying I have to pay the lawyer 3k and my spouse 3k? From everything I read if you agree to pay your spouse any money it would be in a settlement and you would pay her AFTER the divorce is over. The divorce takes 6 months to complete and then an order is issued and you pay her or else she can have the court place a lien on you or garnish your pay etc.

I get the feeling she wants her money to move out- and you know what? TOUGH COOKIES. Life sucks. Its hard. Again, she is not your problem. How she comes up with the funds to provide for herself IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM. Anything issued in the final order is the final order, you will have time to come up with it.

Of course she can ask for a temp order or temp support, but there are so many variables depending on her ability to work and provide for herself etc. So its kind of like- where are you getting this 3k number from? From the lawyer? from her? something you just made up?

Either way- you need to stop sharing your bed with her. CA also considers things like Domestic violence in a divorce and you dont have to browse too far into these forums to see story after story of people falsely accused by someone they loved. Sometimes people see a benefit (a leg up in a divorce or immigration) and they take it. It leaves the other person saying- I never thought they would, or how could they?

------

SO get the divorce moving. Post back when you do.

Your choices will then be to either file ROC if the divorce is done first (if you file now it can be done before the date on your card) or wait for your window to open to file.

Since its tight, you most likely will be filing in the open window of your card- the 90 days before NOV 2015. File for divorce now, it should be done in 6 months- Nov. If you dont have the final decree when you send in the packet (90 days before Nov), you send in what you have and they will RFE you for the final decree and you send it to them because you will have it by then.

[Roz 1]

Damara! Thanks for all your advice.

Yes I'm hiring the lawyer tomorrow. The wife is draining my bank account each week so it has been tough to hire anyone, I'm working 12 hours a day, from 6pm to 6 am, and its draining to see 0 dollars in the account at the end of the week.

I've opened a separate account. I have all the documents prepared that I listed except for the counseling since I cant get hhold of the therapist, Im ready to move on.