Now I can go cry a river: spouse just vanished after 10 months of marriage

[Bluehill 1]

It has been over a year since my last visit here on visajourney. Things have been very disappointing and heartbreaking. I met my spouse thru family members in 2007 in Ghana. After two visits to Ghana I filed for K-1 visa for her to join me because she was so vibrant, kind, full of life,....you know what I mean. It's been a very long and painful process. She arrived in April 09. The following day after her arrival, that vibrant, joyful, kind woman I fell in love with was no more. She was not talking at all and just want to be left alone. I proceded to marry her anyway in the hope that it will get better. I also put her to nursing school so that she can have a job. My expenses on her since 08/07 to date is over $15,000 just to bring her here, file for AOS and school tuition and so on.

She disapeared the day she got her first job. I have no idea where she is. I feel very very hurt but I know it will come back to hurt her also.

[patient2010 93]

WOW!!!! sorry that has happend to you.....I hope things get better

[SisJ 13]

OH wow!!!! This is sad!! Sorry for what she's putting you through.

WOW!!!! sorry that has happend to you.....I hope things get better

I see you have your interview in two days!!! Good luck with it! Hope all goes well!!

[Brother Hesekiel 2,235]

I proceded to marry her anyway in the hope that it will get better. I also put her to nursing school so that she can have a job. My expenses on her since 08/07 to date is over $15,000 just to bring her here, file for AOS and school tuition and so on.

She disapeared the day she got her first job. I have no idea where she is. I feel very very hurt but I know it will come back to hurt her also.

You can't buy love.

But you got a $15K lesson and, of course, you're still on the hook with your Affidavit of Support.

But making mistakes is only human. What counts is that you don't make the same mistake again. There are many millions of lovely Ladies in the USA already, certainly a few hundred-thousand that would rock your boat and make a wonderful spouse for you. Less hassle, much cheaper.

[PAPA MIO 2]

It has been over a year since my last visit here on visajourney. Things have been very disappointing and heartbreaking. I met my spouse thru family members in 2007 in Ghana. After two visits to Ghana I filed for K-1 visa for her to join me because she was so vibrant, kind, full of life,....you know what I mean. It's been a very long and painful process. She arrived in April 09. The following day after her arrival, that vibrant, joyful, kind woman I fell in love with was no more. She was not talking at all and just want to be left alone. I proceded to marry her anyway in the hope that it will get better. I also put her to nursing school so that she can have a job. My expenses on her since 08/07 to date is over $15,000 just to bring her here, file for AOS and school tuition and so on.

She disapeared the day she got her first job. I have no idea where she is. I feel very very hurt but I know it will come back to hurt her also.

You should file a missing person first with the police because if something happens to her they will blame you. Make sure you have receipts of where you were the time she went missing and timeline where you were and who you were with. Cross check cell phone records emails time cards from employment.

Divorce ASAP or she will get more and file for spouse support in the future. Maybe the laywer can help you so you do not lose more money in the divorce and get her visa revoked as fraud.

And take a vacation to celebrate.

[carolynhotstuff 252]

She rejected you from the moment she got here but you married her anyway. Love can be so blind. Filing a missing persons report is the correct thing to do. File for divorce ASAP and after you finish crying, get on with your life.

[GhLove 4]

That is really unfortunate that this happened. Its the very thing that we all are hoping NEVER happens (whether its a marriage between to citizens or someone abroad). But I am very greatful that you were bold enough to come back and tell your story! I don't think enough people do that, but it may help the next person avoid a lot of heartache. Consider some of the suggestions that the others have made, but definatley take care of yourself. Hope that you are able to get through the healing process in due time. May Allah bless you for your stuggle.

[Anh map 2,098]

*Moved from US Embassy & Consulate forum to Major Family Changes forum*

[worriedman 0]

Go ahead and report to the police, something might have happened to her. Check if shes still working or not, and oh go to homelans security or any uscis office and report visa fraud so she cannot change her status after the first 2 yrs of her temporary green card, n if shes got the green card still report her to uscis so she cannot be citizen or renew her green card....this is a case of visa fraud....it makes things difficult for us who are genuine to get visas to be with our loved ones

[JustUs 3]

This is the type of ####### that makes it so difficult to get a visa through the embassy in Ghana. I am so sorry that this has happened to you. It would be a different story if the two of you just didn't get along and agreed to separate. But to just run off on you is truly bad form and smells like the purpose was fraudulent from the beginning. You have gotten some good advice on what you should do legally to keep your situation straight in the eyes of any regulatory body - I hope you follow some of this good advice. In time, your heart will heal and new wisdom will be yours for future application. May you continue to be aware of the blessings God has bestowed upon you.

[trillium13 84]

I see you have your interview in two days!!! Good luck with it! Hope all goes well!!

Have you not had your AOS interview yet? If not, she apparently didn't think this plan of hers all the way through.

[Brownie07 7]

I can only imagine what you're going through. I hope your heart mends and in time you allow yourself to live and love. Wishing you all the best.

[lucky Jimmy 7]

Go ahead and report to the police, something might have happened to her. Check if shes still working or not, and oh go to homelans security or any uscis office and report visa fraud so she cannot change her status after the first 2 yrs of her temporary green card, n if shes got the green card still report her to uscis so she cannot be citizen or renew her green card....this is a case of visa fraud....it makes things difficult for us who are genuine to get visas to be with our loved ones

Guess what. When he reports this to USCIS, they will automatically suspect him of not being a good husband and it is the reason she left. Then she can claim some type of spouse abuse and be on the fast track for citizenship. Seen it happen more than once.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Guess what. When he reports this to USCIS, they will automatically suspect him of not being a good husband and it is the reason she left. Then she can claim some type of spouse abuse and be on the fast track for citizenship. Seen it happen more than once.

This is totally uncalled for as well as off-base. To suggest any such thing under the circumstances as presented is not only inaccurate, it is also unkind and callous. Regardless, the OP has not asked for your judgments or speculations. If you cannot offer something useful to this thread then it is better not to participate in it at all.

Bluehill, I am sorry for your heartache and loss. I hope you will be able to recover and get back on track with your life soon.

Edited November 4, 2010 by Kathryn41

[amykathleen2005 441]

Guess what. When he reports this to USCIS, they will automatically suspect him of not being a good husband and it is the reason she left. Then she can claim some type of spouse abuse and be on the fast track for citizenship. Seen it happen more than once.

Actually I would think reporting would have the exact opposite effect. By reporting her as soon as possible USCIS will know to look for false claims of spousal abuse in order to get a greencard.