K1 and honeymoon

[TBoneTX 43,415]

I wouldn't be where I am today if I kowtowed to political correctness.

There's a distinct difference between political correctness and supercilious dismissiveness. Learn it, please, or the risk exists that your nose will indeed forcefully contact one or more fists.

Note to the general air: Some people have their noses so high in the air that if they walked outside in the rain, they'd drown.

Hoorah, in particular, to JohnnyQuest & JimVaPhuong in this thread. Oh, but sorry -- they (and the rest of us) are mere Colonists, whereas Britannia, led by Emperor Julian, rules the waves. A tax on tea, anybody, verily, wot, si man?

[JulianMelissa 52]

More threats of violence, more insults. And yet I am the rude one here.

Empress, your suggestions sound positively groovy.

[Bernie C 24]

Here I am being tarred and feathered, and yet I've not uttered a single personal insult. I've lost count of the number of you who have called me 'douche' or 'douchebag,' however. And yet I am the evil person here. So rich.

You are incorrect. I am moving here as a permanent resident. You didn't invite me, I'm not your guest. Complain to your USCIS if you have a problem.

You are NOT moving here as a permanent resident. You WILL have to apply for the priveledge of adjusting status to a conditional permanent resident and then a legal permanent resident.

Until you receive such status you are in fact "just visiting".

Just pointing that out!

[The_Dude 1,142]

Here I am being tarred and feathered, and yet I've not uttered a single personal insult. I've lost count of the number of you who have called me 'douche' or 'douchebag,' however. And yet I am the evil person here. So rich.

You are incorrect. I am moving here as a permanent resident. You didn't invite me, I'm not your guest. Complain to your USCIS if you have a problem.

Are you really that oblvious, or is this sort of chemically induced haze that you are posting in? You don't insult people? That's quite a story Julian, one for the ages.

[krautlaus 7]

I'm basically out of here, it's just too funny... you have insulted everyone in this topic and on top of all, hated on everything that is American... even on people who are not even USCs... sigh...

This can't possibly be correct. Are you saying the US Government expects me to just stay in-country until they finish all their greedcard filing? Here I thought your government was trying to get all the foreigners out, and now they're saying I can't leave? Absolutely barmy. Can somebody post a source for this? I can't imagine spending our honeymoon anywhere in the US.

I can't really tell by your photo if you are the mail order purchaser or the purchasee, but I'll just flip a coin and go with 'Alla' since cross-dressing is probably a USCIS no-no. So with that resolved, Alla, thank you but we did 'consider all the advantages and disadvantages of the visas.'

I'm sure the typical trouble-makers will have all sorts of fun with this, but honestly there's nothing much about the US that interests me as a holiday destination. Your Florida is full of fat tourists and loud snotty children, many of whom are from my own country, not to mention the now-polluted ocean. Hawaii is an over-priced tourist trap and full of drug dealers. Even the islands are nothing but tourist traps these days, the interior is too hot, and the North is a bit close to Canada for my tastes, no offense.

Report K and L while you're at it Johnny. What a load of bollocks.

Julian, you are a hateful person, I pity you. Be a man, live up to your own words and grow some balls.

[JulianMelissa 52]

You are NOT moving here as a permanent resident. You WILL have to apply for the priveledge of adjusting status to a conditional permanent resident and then a legal permanent resident.

Until you receive such status you are in fact "just visiting".

Just pointing that out!

Oh, parsing games, my favourite.

[TBoneTX 43,415]

More threats of violence, more insults.

Ten thousand pardons, m'liege. 'Tis the blood oath of the vassal to apprise his betters of dangers toward the Crown. If I have offended, I beg -- nay, supplicate -- m'Lord, for a crust for my supper. Edited June 11, 2010 by TBoneTX

[Rob and Jill 82]

Julian comes across so differently on here than in real life. I guess the thing is that he doesn't suffer fools (as he says) and he really believes that what he is doing is right for him and us, so he has to speak up.

Melissa, a lot of us understand. We're going through the same things, and we have the opportunity to learn from each other. This is a stressful time for those of us who are going through these things, and it doesn't help being thousands of miles apart while it's happening either. I know what it's like. I've learned a lot from some of the people here who have been there before me. I've also learned very little from the jerks on these forums, and I tend to ignore them.

However, with that being said your fiance is not making any of this easier on YOU. My fiance doesn't "suffer fools" either, yet he would never in a million years come on THIS SITE, and because he didn't like the blunt answer he was given accuse someone of having/being a mail-order bride. Your fiance's way of "doing what is right" for the two of you is to insult every single person here on a regular basis. How can that be good for the two of you and your reputation here? It's biting the hand that quite literally is feeding you information. It's irritating to the people who should be a support network for the both of you, and more to you because you're the one putting in 85% of the effort at the moment.

Some people on this site are rude, some are just blunt. Unfortunately, the internet leaves far too much room for interpretation when it comes to conversational intent. However, certain mail order bride comments, don't really leave much room for interpretation and those are the kinds of comments that are causing the both of you strife on these forums. Example of the way to "defend" a little better:

Melissa makes a comment

Someone responds in a snarky manner

Julian jumps in and throws whatever insult he feels will best cut them down

Flame war begins

Instead of the above:

Melissa makes a comment

Someone responds in a snarky manner

Melissa and Julian both ignore said snarky comment and thank the people who have actually said or done something useful to help.

Everyone on VJ is happier.

[The_Dude 1,142]

Your immigration status is not a matter of semantics Julian. Neither is your ignorance of our laws.

[MelissaJulian 30]

Sorry everyone. Julian and I have been Skyping all morning about this. I think the best thing for me to do is just take everyone's advice and look at St. John.

[Vivi6 12]

I know my fiancé has a very strong opinion about having to honeymoon in Hawaii so it is probably not going to be there.

Yeah, Hawaii sucks, I would NEVER want to got there.......................same for Virgin Islands....................horrible, horrible places... sorry, but like most k1 visa holders I had to give up my honeymoon and I've been stuck at home (in San Diego, so can't complain) for over 3 months now. I got AP after 70 days of sending AOS and now I am going back home to Italy in July with my hubby since my mom is remarrying. We are planning a bigger wedding in Italy+some serious honeymoon trip for next year. There are SO many beautiful places in the US I don't think a quick romantic getaway is a bad idea at all. Wish I had the money to do that now! Just my 2 cents though.

[TBoneTX 43,415]

look at St. John.

Even the islands are nothing but tourist traps these days

Lo! Fear ye, lest the humble suggestion incur the displeasure -- verily, the wrath -- of he who is loath to soil foot in the Colonies or by treading any trust territory, verily, alas.

[The_Dude 1,142]

Sorry everyone. Julian and I have been Skyping all morning about this. I think the best thing for me to do is just take everyone's advice and look at St. John.

You are going to have a far more taxing job upon his arrival here Melissa. Americans may at times be brash and boorish, but that's not going to stop them from kicking the living sh!t out of him if he mouths off at a pub or bookstore like he does here.

[JlovesA 109]

Sorry everyone. Julian and I have been Skyping all morning about this. I think the best thing for me to do is just take everyone's advice and look at St. John.

Melissa, I hope you consider my advice to just delete your accounts and/or create new, anonymous accounts. This is never going to end, the flame wars will continue as long as either one of you has a known presence on this site.

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Melissa, I hope you consider my advice to just delete your accounts and/or create new, anonymous accounts. This is never going to end, the flame wars will continue as long as either one of you has a known presence on this site.

I don't believe that.

It might take some time, but I believe MOST members are able to forgive and forget when behaviors change.