Strawberrymermaid

1 hour ago, Simplytex said:

Does anyone here know what the current wait time is:

• between Warsaw embassy receiving a spousal I-130 from NVC to sending the interview date
• how long the wait time is for spousal interviews at Warsaw

 

We just got NOA2 approval from Vermont, so expect in the next few weeks to get NVC/CEAC info, fees paid, and docs uploaded... Hopefully DQ by end of the year. The tricky thing is for us - my wife has never had a Schengen visa, so as many in this forum know there is a big logistical problem for Russians going to Poland. It seems like Schengen visas are taking up to 6 weeks to issue, and appointment slots are not easy to get in a timely manner.

 

My thought on times is something like:

• Early Nov - pay fee/upload docs at NVC
• Early Jan - DQ'ed at NVC, case sent to embassy
• Mid Jan - embassy receives case
• Late Jan - embassy schedules interview
• ??? - interview

 

But since Schengen interview spots are few and far between, I'm not sure if my wife does one of the following:

1. look for a Schengen appointment with Spain/Germany/Greece/Italy asap, and then we just book a 'practice' trip in late Dec/NYE; and then hope that this visa is good for 1 year with multiple entry.... or
2. try to 'guess' when the Warsaw interview would be, and try to get a Schengen visa appointment "just in time" for the Warsaw interview (early to mid Jan?)

I really don't understand their timing to be honest.

My case was expedited last December and sent straight to the embassy. We never got interview notification even 6 months later when I cancelled the visa due to our divorce. Then it took them like 4 months to update as "refused". 

Edited to answer other question: When I was in this process, I recall other Russian applicants waiting until they got their interview date to get Schengen and using special travel agents to help expedite getting the Schengen. And having lots of proof of vacation in other country (greece, hungary etc) and cancelling them last minute to go to Poland. They cancelled their trip details after they entered the county the Schengen was issued from.

Has she had a schengen visa before? I’m removed from this process now but was deep into it previously, and found out many Russian applicants only get 30 day Visas especially for the first Schengen. So if you are trying to go ahead and get one far ahead of the interview that might not work. 

1 minute ago, Chancy said:

 

If you mean the petition, an approved I-130 would not expire, as it is based on an existing family relationship.  The approval would need to be revoked or the petition withdrawn.  Revocation happens when new information comes to light (say, at the visa interview) that the petition approval was granted in error, perhaps due to fraudulent information in the original submission.  If there was no fraud involved but the petitioner no longer wants to pursue immigration for the beneficiary or the relationship no longer exists (as will soon be in your case), the petitioner may withdraw the I-130.  Withdrawal of the petition is not required, but if one is filed, it may not be retracted.

 

That makes sense, thank you.

Do I write to the center that processed the petition to withdraw the I-130?

3 minutes ago, Mike E said:

Did you write USCIS asking to withdraw your I-130? What is the status of the USCIS case number assigned to your I-130?

 

Did you withdraw your I-864?

Hmm no I did not. I wrote the US Embassy in Warsaw withdrawing the case. I wrote NVC, but they told me it was at the embassy so to write them instead.

How do I withdraw I-864? Is that separate from the case at the embassy?

The status of the USCIS case number has a little box at the top that says "case closed", with a status on Sept 2, 2021 of "Case was sent to the Dept of State". 

Hello all,

The CEAC status of my soon to be ex-husband changed to "REFUSED" after months of "READY". He never had an interview as I withdrew it before we ever got an interview date. I withdrew the application back in May but did not receive confirmation until July, then the status did not move until now.

Will it be sent back to USCIS to expire? Just curious how that will work.

3 hours ago, Silentcloud said:

After I patched up with her tendering apologies even though there was no fault on my end it went on a couple weeks and the situation went really bad. She decided to go back to Ukraine and I said sure. She initially was suggesting that she didn't want a divorce but just go away for good. I told her that she can go away but only after the divorce has been filed. She said that she wants to continue our relationship after the divorce and expecting me to come meet her in Ukraine or any other neighboring countries in the Europe. She said she has a great connection with me which she didn't have with anyone before and I'm a great husband and a father taking care of her kids. I have said very softly that it is not going work and it is very expensive to continue the relationship. I'll be her free sponsor to take her around the world bearing all the expenses for her. I don't make big money and also I don't want to have that long distance headache with no future.

 

I approached a local attorney for a no fault divorce and he assured me that she wouldn't get any alimony. The documents got prepared and gave them to her to read through at this point. Yesterday, she was asking to appoint a separate legal counsel for her at my cost and also reminded me of my financial responsibility towards her. I said I'm not going to do that and she can get an attorney on her own. I'm extremely exhausted and tired and just want to get over with and get back to my single happy life. After going through all the effort life has taught me a big lesson that showing unconditional love, respect and value to someone wouldn't get even 10% of that back. I'm not sad by any means but will take at least an year or more to get over all the financial and emotional loss and I have determined to stay single the rest of my life.

 

Thanks all for your emotional support and direction.

Im really sorry this happened. My marriage also didn't work out but I realized before he got to the US that we were not a good fit.

Has she been officially served? I tried to serve my ex in Russia via email and hoped he would waive service but he did not so I'm having to jump through hoops to officially serve him. I would confirm with your lawyer that they can be officially served as her being back in Ukraine will greatly complicate that. It sounds like if she wants a lawyer and isn't going to sign then it might not be uncontested. I am dealing with the same. I am going to have to pay my ex husband to settle even though we never lived together and were only married 16 months. Its insane. 

Did you sign I-864?

I did this 7 months into waiting for the k1. Honestly I would not advise switching that far into the waiting. 

20 minutes ago, Crazy Cat said:

The divorce judge might disagree.

This is my fear as well. You just never know what a judge is going to decide.... He will never have the earning capacity or potential that I have. He is not educated, he does not make much money.. etc. Could a judge say, hey, he will NEVER make as much money as her and she owes him alimony for a long period of time? Or, she owes him the ability to get an education and a better job? Probably not, but, if alimony is based on the party's need and the other's ability to pay, stranger things have happened. We were married for 16 months before I filed for divorce. It doesn't matter what is fair or right or even reasonable. I think it's judge's interpretations of the law/ equitable division/ long term earning potential. I hope I'm wrong, but I am fearful. Thankfully we have no children or joint property. I spent thousands of dollars in the last couple years. This was an expensive mistake that I don't want to have to pay for, for much longer.

It's also hard for me to even differentiate between our marriage and other outside factors. Russian war, not my fault. World pandemic, not my fault. Him quitting his job? Not my fault but he claims it was for us. Him not being able to make more money... is that my fault or my responsibility? 

If I already hired a lawyer who filed the paperwork and is doing research for me, is it worth it to call others who may have more experience with international divorces?

17 minutes ago, Sarge2155 said:

I wholeheartedly concur, I would not give him a dime. Dig in your heels and go along for the ride. It's the I-864 you were worried about and now you have preempted that so what more can he do other than not sign the papers. But again I would not give him a dime papers signed or not!!!! Divorces you can run from but only for so long...ride it out and protect yourself! If he wants to fight he has to come here to the US and I do not see how that's going to happen. You have the upper hand at the moment! Do not I repeat do not discuss any personal details especially financial with him. Consider him a stranger now!

I honestly could see him & his family pulling some kind of crazy request to get him an emergency US tourist visa to come to the US "and fight his ex wife who wronged him".

Aint love grand.. but aint divorce a real pain...

4 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Dovorce is a State issue but every case I have seen has allowed publication where delivery is not possible.

 

I can see a few thousand might be preferable to more legal fees, but then legal fees would be an issue for him if he wants to go in that direction.

 

Alimony? That seems a very long shot.

I just never know what a court will decide... I know this is just a grab for money and a couple thousand may appease him and he will settle. I don't want to be stuck with my attorney fees, his attorney fees, and additional money to pay him on top of that. Even though I'm just a "rich American" in his eyes lol

1 hour ago, JeanneAdil said:

i wouldn't either

there is no way to guarantee he'll sign divorce papers after getting  any amount of money

he can then ask for more as u are rich American

In Tennessee the norm is 

1 year of alimony is paid every three years of marriage 

 

If a lawyer told me to pay,  i would fire the lawyer as u have not financially  hurt him by USCIS advice which says "do not sell property or quit a job till u have visa in hand"

 

1.  Send divorce papers thru  paid certified mail and a copy by regular mail/  you have his address

2.  he doesn't sign 

then

Can you get a divorce without the other person signing in TN?

 

In Tennessee, if a spouse will not sign divorce papers after being served, there are still ways to move forward with the divorce. You can file with the court and await an assigned court date. If your spouse does not show up for that court date, the judge will grant a divorce by default judgment.

 

or 

 

. Service via publication: If you know where your spouse is, you can ask the court for permission to serve “by publication.” You’ll pay to post a notice in a local newspaper for a specific number of days, and the court then presumes that the spouse has been served.

 

 

Thank you Jeanne! So I was going to offer a couple thousand to settle as part of the divorce - I believe he just wants money in general.  the other issue is that you cannot send ANY mail to Russia at the money. No USPS, DHL, fedex etc 

14 minutes ago, Jorgedig said:

Wow.  Beyond ridiculous.  I can't see any US judge awarding him alimony, ever.  He hasn't lost anything (except GC!), he is still home, he isn't unable to work because he's taking care of your kids, etc.

 

You got this, girl.  

 

Another idea:  if his end-game is a GC, isn't it in his best interest to divorce quickly so that he can find the next USC prospect?

thank you for your kind words ❤️
 

The ONLY thing I can see him claiming with any merit is him quitting his cruise ship contract 5 months early. At the time it was discussed if we had an interview he would go home early, we never had one and he quit anyway. Then went home and spent all the money he made lol. But it was just the contract, he is still rehireable by the company.

I think his main objective is to get out of Russia by any means necessary. Can’t say I blame him but it won’t be at my expense. He even tried to blame me for “loss of his international tourist and work visas”. As if I’m wholly responsibly for a worldwide pandemic and closure of the Moscow embassy….
 

I know I have some responsibility in this and wanted this at one point. That point is no longer right now 😂 But I want to get out of this without draining my resources or ruining my life lol.  

1 minute ago, Jorgedig said:

I wouldn't give him a dime.  Totally opportunistic money grab.

 

In most cases, 'alimony,' or spousal support is designed to help the spouse with fewer resources to "get back on their feet."  Did you live together, and did you support him financially?  

 

Personally, I'd dig my heels in.  Sounds like it was a short marriage that didn't even progress to living together, and someone wants to harvest the US dollar.

Never lived together and I never supported him day to day financially. I paid for our trips, our wedding, and our paperwork but nothing like rent or food etc. He has some US family - also immigrants- who I believe are somewhat behind the money grab. His mother also “fake married” a man back around 2006 to keep him and his brother in the US on a tourist visa. The marriage crumbled (obviously) and his brother turned 18 before that so he could stay but my former spouse was underage and had to go back to Russia. It was never reported as fake but he told me as such. Not really relevant I guess but gives more backstory. 

9 minutes ago, Jorgedig said:

Oh no@  Sorry to hear.  Aren't you the ones who met on a cruise?

Yes that was us. Unfortunately we were just not a good match, I did so much heavy lifting in our marriage from paying for all our trips, The paperwork etc. (I originally did k1 and cancelled 7 months in…) combine that with a worldwide pandemic, and a dumpster fire of the Russian war that wasn’t a good foundation for a marriage. 

24 minutes ago, Family said:

A quick Google 
 

https://www.legallanguage.com/legal-articles/update-how-to-service-process-in-russia-2018/

I’m hopeful it will be decided an email will suffice as he has already communicated directly through my lawyer through email!! Wow! Also I was not going to offer anywhere near 25k. A couple months ago he left his cruise ship job (even though I did not want him to) to go home and prepare for the interview (that we didn’t have yet). He’s claiming the 25k is for “significant harm and loss” of his lost wages when in reality the lost wages are more around 5k. I was going to offer that as a start. My parents had a long drawn out alimony battle and I’m afraid of the court system at this point and what they may decide. 
 

thank you everyone for your help. This site has always been nothing but helpful and informative for me. 

2 minutes ago, Family said:

Invest a little  DIY research/time consulting w a few Real Russian US attorneys ( that work w the community) , just on the service issue. 
 

And of course, not my expertise, but is service by publication out of the question, given circumstances? 

That’s a good question. My attorney said she was looking into how to handle it last week and I think asking the judge in my county as well? Perhaps publication could be allowed but again a real mess given the current situation. What I’m also not understand is if I do agree to send him any money how would he even get it? All transfer services and bank cards have been cut off. Can you pay alimony in crypto? 😂😂 

Let this be a warning to those starting the process. Be absolutely sure this is what you want because it’s a mess to get out of 

1 minute ago, Family said:

In either case your marriage is approx 2 yrs or less..but it would be nice to know from family law gurus , if he hires a US attorney how many times is it possible to waive appearance and prolong the misery?

 

One VJ poster reported bringing his wife ( though she was in US) to court 34 times just to drain her coffers. 
 

May i ask did you manage proof of service for Russia? 
 

No I-864 liabilities since you blocked his visa issuance 

That is going to be the issue I believe- serving him. My attorney mentioned she believes he knows this and that is why he is asking for money, so we can settle and he gets something out of it since it will be so difficult to secure a process server in Russia 

12 minutes ago, JeanneAdil said:

he would have to file for alimony in US court with US lawyer so not sure how he would accomplish this

If u file for Divorce in Tn,   is he coming to fight the action 

alimony in our state is determined by who has funds and who needs them

being able to hire a US lawyer would be determintal to showing he needs funds

 

How is alimony determined in Tennessee?

 

There is no precise formula for calculating alimony. The court uses its discretion and crafts a solution on a case-by-case basis. In that process, the court generally considers the ability of one spouse to pay; and the needs of the other spouse to whom temporary alimony is sought to be paid.

 

and 

 

 

The civil action for alienation of affection has been abolished in Tennessee

 

 

 

Hmm this is actually helpful thank you! I had wanted to just file uncontested and part ways amicably but he asked for 25k in order for him to sign. 
 

My attorney has advised me that it may be best to offer something to try to settle since it is near impossible to serve him papers in Russia at this moment. 

16 minutes ago, Crazy Cat said:

Where is your spouse right now?

He is in Russia still. 

Hello! 
 

I have filed for divorce against my spouse in Russia and just want to move on with my life. 
 

I successful wrote the Warsaw embassy and cancelled the case before the interview was ever scheduled and got confirmation. However the I-864 I signed is only valid if he would have gotten his visa is that correct? He’s coming after me for money/ alimony and I hope he doesn’t try to collect that amount for 10 years in alimony. 

Checking in and making sure everyone is doing okay. My process ended as we are divorcing. Was all just too much!! Happy many of you got your visas though!