TracyTN

Since you've not filed AOS yet - you've not sent in the I-864, right ?
Some suggestions.
1. Call ICE (# below), tell them that he's left, and you are filing for divorce, with no intention of further sponsership. This will start a national casefile, but it's tedious to 'get things into it'.
2. Get an INFOPASS appointment for your local USCIS office, and let them know you are filing for divorce, and tell them the circumstances of why you are not filing the AOS package with him. This will start a local case file. While yer there - ask to speak to the Head of Section for BOTH 'Fraud Prevention' and 'ICE' and make sure that casefiles are started in both sections. At some point, these two casefiles will rbe married up together, and sent off to the National Office
3. SEND A POSTAL LETTER to the USCIS office closest to where he is living, explain all, ask that a casefile be started in the local ICE unit and local Fraud Prevention Unit.
4. SEND A POSTAL LETTER to the Embassy IV Unit where he interviewed, explain all, let them know that he came in on a K-1 visa with fraudulent intent.
None of this stuff is automatic or in real time. It takes time, energy, and patience (on your part) to get the ball rolling. Once the ball is rolling, it will roll hard when next he is found (traffic stop, drunk and disorderly charge, etc). The 'national pick up order' will be issued to all local law enforcement, but he won't just be casually picked up, he'll have to be stopped on something else first. At some point, the locals will turn him over to ICE, and then they'll actually do something with him, based on the contents of the casefiles that you got started.
Just to be clear - YOU can't get him deported, only ICE and DHS can do that - the most you can do is make sure that the casefiles (plural) are full of evidence of his fraud. Practice writing letters of attestation, you'll need these for the casefiles.
Good Luck !

I didn't say that putting the issue out there may not be beneficial to others. It may well be. But this has been going on for a while now - since December 2009 . Is there much more conversation to be had?
It's time to either s*** or get off the pot.

And no amount of posts on VJ is going to change that.

If you're willing to put up triple the fees for a faster process, then that would be what it would take. Extra man power.
The people on VJ are only a very small percentage of the people filing/the cases that USCIS has to go through. Every case has to have the background checks, the evidence checks, has to be looked at carefully, etc.
From what I see, it's actually gotten better from what it used to be, so be thankful.
Actually, be thankful you have the opportunity to bring your loved one here. It would be just as easy for the Government to say "nope" to all cases like these. That's something to consider and something that would truly be UNACCEPTABLE.
There are bigger things to complain about, and there's always the option of you moving to your loved ones nation or trying to go elsewhere.

I didn't say that putting the issue out there may not be beneficial to others. It may well be. But this has been going on for a while now - since December 2009 . Is there much more conversation to be had?
It's time to either s*** or get off the pot.

But in all seriousness, Gilles - what do you really expect here? Surely you've heard the old adage 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result', right? We passed that several months ago I think.
But at any rate - its clear this is just who your wife is so, as I see it, you have two options:
1.) Learn to accept her behavior (and stop complaining about it). Taking on another job to help you pay your bills and for her priorities wouldn't be a bad idea.
2.) Divorce her
Otherwise, I'm beginning to think we have enough evidence now to suggest insanity.

But in all seriousness, Gilles - what do you really expect here? Surely you've heard the old adage 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result', right? We passed that several months ago I think.
But at any rate - its clear this is just who your wife is so, as I see it, you have two options:
1.) Learn to accept her behavior (and stop complaining about it). Taking on another job to help you pay your bills and for her priorities wouldn't be a bad idea.
2.) Divorce her
Otherwise, I'm beginning to think we have enough evidence now to suggest insanity.

"love" is why people don't leave when they're being abused.
"love" is why people make stupid decisions.
While I agree with remembering love when making decisions, mutual RESPECT is my biggest issue. Your wife does not respect you. I couldn't live with my opinions constantly being ignored and not valued. Of basically not being an important member of the relationship.
If your wife wants to send HER money that's all well and good, but HER money should also go towards household expenses. It's apparent that there's a great issue here and you keep thinking that love will conquer all... it doesn't. Eventually resentment starts to creep in and eventually that turns to hatred.
If you're okay with her working and her money going home and her income contributing nothing to the household but yours does 100% then that's fine. But if you want at least a little bit of help then she needs to help out. She is treating you like a cash cow. Some relationships monetary support is never an issue. My husband works and I don't. His income supports us, and income I earned while in Aus just recently he's treating as "mine"... but I am using the money for things that I want/need that otherwise he would have bought (winter gear for instance and wedding pressies that we were supposed to buy last year). When I get a job you bet my income is going into the same family pool. We'll have a discussion (which we have already) about how much "spending money" we can afford and how much should go to savings.
Financial matters are one of the leading reasons for divorce. From here: http://www.divorcereform.org/cau.html
"Why Marriages Fail
Not all marriages fail for the same reason. Nor is there usually one reason for the breakdown of a particular marriage. Nevertheless, we hear some reasons more often than others. They are:
- Poor communication
- Financial problems
- A lack of commitment to the marriage
- A dramatic change in priorities
- Infidelity
There are other causes we see a lot, but not quite as often as those listed above. They are:
- Failed expectations or unmet needs
- Addictions and substance abuse
- Physical, sexual or emotional abuse
- Lack of conflict resolution skills"
Love is great but love shouldn't make you stressed out and unhappy. Love shouldn't make you feel irrelevant. Love should make you feel respected and admired. A marriage should be a two-way street and it's apparent that in this area, it's not. Your wife is the boss and if you don't fall into line she will work around you to get her way.
I suggest you personally seek counselling (and together) to figure out why you think you're not worthy of respect in the relationship. And she needs to find out why she refuses to listen to you and why no compromise can be made. Maybe once you stop financially supporting her and she can no longer sustain the amount she currently sends to family, she'll have an idea of what living REALLY costs.
Stop being a cash cow. Be a husband, partner and friend. If you're only the one (husband) then that's no life.

Follow the form instructions and send it to the lockbox.

caps lock is considered to be "shouting" on the internet.

I don't necessarily agree with that. This is an open forum and no matter if you're in the 'comfort' of your regional, you better be prepared to stand by what you say, as well as expect others to not always agree with you. Being in the regional forum doesn't give you a license to be a jerk, in my mind.
Now going to a regional for the sole purpose of causing trouble - which is trolling, basically - is another matter.

They aren't required to conduct an interview if they find a solid reason to deny before the interview.
The EAD was approved because she's eligible for an EAD while the AOS petition is pending. Approving the EAD doesn't suggest a thing about the AOS petition being approvable or not.
You won't know anything until you get the denial letter and see the reason they denied. You'll have a narrow window of time (less than a month) to file a motion to reopen the case. The form is I-290B, and the filing fee is $630. Your motion must address the specific reason that they used to deny the AOS, and it must include NEW evidence. If you don't specifically address the reason they denied, or you send evidence they've already seen, then your motion will be denied. This is your last best chance to get this rectified. If this fails then you're going to be dealing with the immigration court, the BIA, and ultimately the federal appeals court system. If you think AOS was expensive, wait until you have to pay an attorney to represent you in a federal appeals court.
I highly recommend you find some way to pay a very good immigration lawyer to prepare your motion to reopen, and that you work closely with the lawyer to ensure that everything you send is accurate. This is no time to hold back. You're going to need to send the very best evidence you've got, and as much of it as possible.

Yes, they should have warnings on forums. They should put a 'warning, passive aggressive anti-american sentiments" or "warning: overt misogyny" on the appropriate regional forum too

Well, I read it and I knew that it would go nowhere for me to try and make a rational point. (Sort of like the definition of insanity.) Nor did I really care because cheeseheads will be cheeseheads.
So it's a bit about knowing who the players are. If you don't know anything about the 'culture' in that forum, then you may try to jump in and make some headway only to be beaten down. No way for people to understand that unless and until they experience it themselves, unfortunately - which is why some mod intervention would be a help (bringing us back to the original point, as well as the suggestion of reporting).

This is a very interesting, and indeed tricky, topic. I've thought a fair bit about this over the years. One of the reasons I've been an active member (well, maybe not all that active--after 5 1/2 years I only have three hearts!) for so long is that VJ is a really interesting and fun site because of its exceptionally diverse membership.
I don't think "family friendly" is an apt term to describe its ideal tone, though. As someone mentioned, users are nearly all adults, and I don't think someone should be reprimanded for typing something racy. Boasting about one's wife's BJ prowess, for example, while cringe-inducing and uncouth in the extreme, shouldn't be off limits, I don't think. Fortunately, most posters have the good manners not to post detailed descriptions of their encounters, which brings up another question about what might constitute obscenity.
As for the out and out insults toward entire groups--all men or women from a certain country or region, for example--that's a trickier matter because it may contribute to the site appearing to be less than hospitable. Cultivating a welcoming atmosphere, which I think VJ does quite well on the whole, is paramount. Personally, I couldn't give a sh!t less what certain posters think about "American women." As Tracy said, cheeseheads will be cheeseheads. And given that a good number of VJ members are either American women or foreign men married or engaged to American women, these guys end up looking like a Grade A assmonkeys. Maybe the question is whether people should be free to be Grade A assmonkeys? I think so, for the most part, but some members might be driven away by this sort of thing.
With so many users from so many different places going through a stressful process, you're going to have some--er--colorful language and exchanges.
I'm not sure if I'm even making a point here, except to note that this is an interesting discussion!

I don't necessarily agree with that. This is an open forum and no matter if you're in the 'comfort' of your regional, you better be prepared to stand by what you say, as well as expect others to not always agree with you. Being in the regional forum doesn't give you a license to be a jerk, in my mind.
Now going to a regional for the sole purpose of causing trouble - which is trolling, basically - is another matter.

I don't necessarily agree with that. This is an open forum and no matter if you're in the 'comfort' of your regional, you better be prepared to stand by what you say, as well as expect others to not always agree with you. Being in the regional forum doesn't give you a license to be a jerk, in my mind.
Now going to a regional for the sole purpose of causing trouble - which is trolling, basically - is another matter.

I don't necessarily agree with that. This is an open forum and no matter if you're in the 'comfort' of your regional, you better be prepared to stand by what you say, as well as expect others to not always agree with you. Being in the regional forum doesn't give you a license to be a jerk, in my mind.
Now going to a regional for the sole purpose of causing trouble - which is trolling, basically - is another matter.

Newbie here, so pardon if it seems like I'm intruding, but the topic of this thread is one I've been asking myself for some time. I'm newly registered but I've been lurking one particular regional for some time. And instead of beating around the bush any more, I'll just come out and say it's the Russia/Ukraine/Belarus regional. Some...no...MUCH...of what I read in that forum is to put it mildly, disgusting. It's like some good old boy's club from the 1970s. Women are spoken about in the most awful terms, and when someone takes issue with it then they're just one of those awful Western feminazis, or they'll defend themselves by saying they're just joking and having good fun. I should caveat that I'm not talking about everyone in there. In fact, it's really only about 3-4 names that keep popping up this way. But there never seems to be any moderator who steps in to say this or that is inappropriate. I dunno, is this normal for this site?
I get the impression Visa Journey tries to label itself as "family friendly," and I think I've even read it somewhere. I also don't see quite this level of inappropriate locker room "humor" in the other regional forums. I'm too new here to offer up any reasons as to why that is--are there specific moderators who handle specific regions and this one is just being neglected? I don't know. But at least the forum I mentioned isn't even close to what I'd call "family friendly."
I've kept my mouth shut for these few months because we're coming up on our 10 year green card, Visa Journey seems like a great resource that I wish I'd known about in the beginning, and I didn't want to alienate possible resources in the specific regional forum that could be of the most help. But thanks to this thread, I just can't keep my mouth shut anymore so I'll take my chances. I tried using the "Contact us" link to voice my concerns, but I don't think anyone reads it because I've had no reply.
Anyway, my experience so far is that if this site is labeling itself as "family friendly," then it's got a long way to go. Ironic in a sad sort of a way for a family immigration web site.

We've been doing the standard too. Initially I was tempted to space them out after talking to a couple of people (not medical people), but after talking to the doctor, I decided to have them done on the usual schedule--or at least what the pediatrician's office considers a usual schedule. She had three shots and an oral vaccine at her 2-month, and two shots and an oral at the 4-month.
I find the vaccination controversy befuddling. On one hand, it's a good thing that people are doing research and trying to be informed, but the tone of many "anti-vaxers" seems to border on the hysterical. I know that getting vaccinated is not without risk, but the chances of something really bad happening as a result are infinitesimal. Also, when Mad-Ag was sick with a cold for over a week, I was pretty worried. I can only imagine my state of freak-out (and guilt) if she ended up with a serious preventable illness.
I'm not a scientist or a medical professional, so I feel I should put my trust in the hands of people who are, and have faith that they are knowledgeable and have my kid's best interests at heart. I know that some people view the healthcare industry as some sort of racket that preys on people's fears and pushes unnecessary drugs and treatments for largely monetary reasons. There may be a bit of truth in there somewhere, but I don't feel I'm in a position to determine that keeping my kid from getting vaccines is going to benefit her.

Finally living together as Man and Wife............priceless.

All I'm saying is don't ever be the reason he doesn't see or visit her. If it's his choice, then fine.

This is NOT what anyone would have done. She's married. She's no longer eligible for the K1 visa. The Cenomar is the least of your worries. You're going to have to get MARRIED in the United States AFTER she arrives or she won't be eligible to adjust status. That means you're going to have to LIE when you tell the county clerk that you're not married!
What you should have done is withdrawn the petition when you got married. The best course of action now is to return to the consulate and get the visa canceled, and then apply for a CR1.
K3's are rarely granted anymore because the I-129F and I-130 are almost always approved at the same time. NVC just closes the I-129F and sends the I-130 to the consulate.

I thought Evi's post was pretty straightforward. She said what she meant and that's fine. But when you do that, you have to be prepared for people to disagree with your characterizations. Bailing from this thread as some kind of solution to that seems a bit dramatic to me - but to each his own.

Are we reading the same thread? What I cull from reading this is that she's asked a few very basic q's, and we answered. She said she hasn't even met him yet. She's even said she plans to go to uni first. What is the problem? Let's face it, in a year or less, this young lady is going to be an adult, and is going to be responsible for making her own choices Not you, not me, not her mother, but she will be in charge of whatever she wants to do. I think it was quite smart of her to see what's down the road, should she look to pursue it.
While she is young, nothing that you can say can prove that she is not ready for a serious commitment. Maybe she is, maybe she isn't. Maybe right now she's thinking down the road they might marry, and maybe she'll change her mind, But at the end of the day, they're a long way off either way...and if this is something they want to pursue, and she works hard to meet the req's, then it's her choice to make.
Sometimes, being a parent means you have to let your children make their own mistakes, And as is the case with young adults especially, the more you try to dissuade them from something, the more you'll actually be pushing them towards it. I say save the lectures and admonishment for your own adult children.
In fact, most of the advice here given came with mild disclaimers such as stressing the importance of school, the importance of the 'what ifs' regarding his employability, etc.
I realize I'm probably coming across as snarky, and it's really unintentional. I appreciate your advice actually. But I didn't see this situation as in need of a lecture, to either the OP or the members for giving the advice.