Hypnos

Thanks for all the well-wishers, once more.
 
I had my oath earlier today (well, yesterday now) in Dallas. There were 110 people being naturalised from 35 different countries, with the most being 23 from India and 24 from Mexico.
 
There was a minor issue where I had to scribble out the name of my home town on the "Signed at" location on the N-445 questionnaire, since I had already filled that in before arriving. The MC announced that only Dallas or Irving was acceptable there, but it was a quick fix.
 
Other than that it was a nice event, with a lot of people there, and friends and family. One of the cops I know from the PD showed up, which was a really nice touch and meant a lot.
 
So, this chapter of my life is now over. Onto the next...

Despite being here for 18 years it seems that challenge may be beyond me.

I'm used to USCIS being a poorly-run federal agency in general, but every once in a while I'll read a story like this that reminds me there are some good people working there who will go above and beyond. There just aren't a whole heck of a lot of them. 

So I became an LPR on 3rd April, 2013. This meant that according to USCIS' filing calculator I became eligible to file an N-400 on 3rd January, 2018 (plus five years minus 90 days). I filed my N-400 online through ELIS at 2:30am, staying up late because I was excited to finally begin this final chapter in my immigration journey.
 
I hit an early roadblock when the receipt NoA for some reason assigned me an N-400 priority date of the previous day, 2nd January. The "application received on" date was correct since it said 3rd January. I posted about it here more than once, and the consensus seemed to be that USCIS would honour the "received" date, not the "priority" date.
 
It took a year of waiting (thanks, Dallas backlog) but I eventually got my naturalisation interview scheduled for 14th January of this year. I dutifully attended, answered all questions and passed all the tests, but was told a decision could not be made. Well the decision was made tonight, and a denial notice popped up in my online USCIS account. The reason? I applied too early. The notice stated that I applied on 2nd January, 2018, and was only eligible to file on 3rd January, 2018. Again, this wasn't mentioned at the interview, and I brought all my emailed ELIS receipts and other documents showing I filed on 3rd January in case they ever brought it up, but they didn't.
 
So it's been a fun night. After a brief period of shouting, loudly, I began to move into attack mode.
 
What I have done so far:
 
1) Emailed the CIS Ombudsman giving them the entire story, receipts with timestamps showing I applied on the correct date, and all that jazz. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure the Ombudsman is closed right now as part of the partial federal government shutdown, so I'm not really expecting much out of this immediately.
 
2) I'm going to my Congressman's local office tomorrow to give them the story and all the same documents and seeing if they can intercede with USCIS on my behalf.
 
3) Emailed my old lawyer and another lawyer that helped me back in 2013 to see if they can offer suggestions. Not trying to freeload on them; I offered to pay whatever fee they deem reasonable on this, since it's obviously no longer in DIY territory.
 
4) I'll be contacting the two biggest local newspapers, the Dallas Morning News and the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, to see if they're interested in doing a story on this. I figure the more attention I can get on it the more likely I am to get something done.
 
I also have the option of either filing a fresh application, together with its $725 fee and one year wait time, or an N-336 formal appeal of their decision. Fun fact on the N-336: it costs $700 to file, and you will often wait almost as long as it costs to process a new N-400, so they kinda get you coming and going on that one. I'm not ruling anything out yet, but for now I'm hanging my hat on something from 1-4 getting me somewhere on this.
 
So at the end of the day, anyone intending to file for naturalisation on the day they become eligible: DON'T DO IT. Wait a couple of days, then submit. You will avoid all this bull, and can instead deal with some other USCIS bull that will be unrelated to this.
 
Now it's time to write some letters to newspapers and see if I can get anywhere. I will post replies here as to what happens, if anything meaningful does.

USCIS is a poorly run federal agency. This has been my opinion for years, and is not based solely on this.
 
They made a similar mistake in the processing of my green card. In 2012 I filed a concurrent widower I-360 and I-485 in April. At the time, processing times were ~3-4 months at Dallas for family-based I-485 (which a widower petition still counts as, since widow/ers remain immediate relatives of a US citizen). Sure enough, I get my interview at Dallas for June. When I go to that interview, the first thing they tell me is that they do not have jurisdiction over my I-360 and so the interview cannot continue. I tell him that I am very sure he does, but they're adamant, and wind up sending my I-360 off to VSC. It took literally months of negotiating with the CIS Ombudsman and a lawyer experienced in the niche area of widow/er immigration lawyer before USCIS agreed to return my applications to Dallas. But then as a final mistake, instead of sending them back to Dallas, they instead sent them to the Houston field office instead. Cue another 6 weeks of Ombudsman intervention before they eventually sent them to Dallas, where I got my second interview and was approved instantly, as would have been the case nine months previously had they known what they were doing.
 
How can I be sure they erred when they sent my I-360 and I-485 to VSC? Because last year I filed a FOIA for a copy of my complete alien file, and buried deep in there was a memo from VSC stating plainly that since my I-360 and I-485 were concurrently filed as a family-based application, they should have been adjudicated by the field office and not sent to VSC, exactly as I and the Ombudsman had told them many months before. And this is not to make it all about me, I am very aware of how unimportant I am in all of this, it's just to highlight that this is not my first rodeo when it comes to USCIS errors. And of course, that error itself had the knock on effect of making it nine months later until I could file for naturalisation, which I require for employment since I'm trying to become a cop in Texas.
 
I have seen so many horror stories posted here about USCIS mistakes, sometimes very basic ones that should have at worst been caught by a supervisor, but were not. The US immigration system need a complete root-and-branch overhaul of all its operations, and has done probably for decades now. But since that would cost $$$ and it only really negatively impacts immigrants, it's obviously not a priority for anyone, and so we continue to kick this can down the road, again, and again, and again.
 
This thought has not been lost on me. All I can think of over these past few days is how much of a fool I was to not wait 1-2 days after the eligibility date, and that all likelihood I would have my oath letter in my hands already had I done that. That is why I posted this thread, as a cautionary tale to encourage people not to make the same mistake I did. Now that being said, I still filed within the 90 day period and by the letter of the law was unfairly denied, but if I could do it all over again I would obviously not file until a couple of days after.

Q1: An I-130 has been filed already. I'm now inside the US, can I file for adjustment of status? Q2: I was visiting my boyfriend / girlfriend and we spontaneously decided to get married. Can I stay and adjust status? A: Provided you did not lie to CBP at PoE or on any previous visa applications (for example: saying you were visiting on business when in fact you were coming to visit a girlfriend / boyfriend / spouse) then, generally yes. It usually goes to intent. You cannot enter the US on a nonimmigrant visa with the preconceived intent to remain and adjust status, but if you enter the US and then change your mind, or your circumstances change, then adjustment of status is an option. It should be noted that intent alone cannot be used to deny an application for adjustment of status if it is the sole negative factor (see Matter of Battista). If you have already filed an I-130 and are now filing an I-485 on top of it, enclose a copy of the I-130 NOA with your adjustment of status packet. Note that your I-130 does not have to have been approved before you can submit an I-485, you can submit an I-485 even if the I-130 is still only pending. Q: On the I-485 part 2, what application type should I select? A: If you are filing an I-130 and I-485 concurrently (or you have already filed an I-130 and are now filing an I-485 to go with it) you should select Option A, because if you read through the brackets it says "attach a copy of the approval notice, or a relative...visa petition filed with this application." A "relative visa petition" = I-130. If you are adjusting from a K-1 (or K-2) and married on or before the 90th day indicated on your I-94 then you should select Option C. Q: I'm adjusting from a K-1 and already had a medical performed overseas within the past year. Do I need to have another medical performed by a civil-surgeon and get an I-693 completed? A: You may or may not. See Nich-Nick's excellent post which explains if you need to have another medical performed: http://www.visajourn...port/?p=6206232 Q: I entered on a K-1 and married within 90 days, but haven't yet filed for adjustment of status. My I-94 has expired, can I still file? A: Yes. When your I-94 expired then your period of authorised stay ended and you became illegally present in the US, incurring overstay. A spouse of a US citizen is an immediate relative though, and as such, overstay does not prevent them from adjusting status. You must only have entered the country legally, not necessarily maintained your nonimmigrant status. As soon as USCIS accept your I-485 for processing then your overstay clocks stops (if you filed after your I-94 expired) and you are placed in a new period of authorised stay which will persist until your I-485 is adjudicated, however long that takes. Q: I'm filing an I-765 with or after my I-485. What eligibility category code should I use?
A: C-9.
Q: I didn't apply for an EAD or AP with my initial AoS application, can I still do so? Is the fee still waived? A: Yes, you can. Complete an I-765 and / or an I-131 and include a copy of the receipt NOA for your I-485 showing that you have paid the I-485 fee and the EAD and AP fees will be waived. Q: My I-485 is still pending, but my AP and / or EAD are about to expire. Can I renew them? Do I need to pay a fee? A: Yes. You should file for a replacement AP and / or EAD 120 days before your current documents will expire, if your I-485 is still pending. Enclose a copy of your I-485 receipt NOA with your renewal applications and your new documents will be processed without charge. Q: Will I have an adjustment of status interview? A: If you're adjusting from a K-1 (or K-2) then accepted thinking indicates you have around a 50-50 chance of actually having an interview. After a month or two you may receive a "Notice of Potential Interview Waiver" in the mail, telling you that your AoS may not need an interview but will take additional months of processing. This notice is not a guarantee that you won't have an interview. You will either just spontaneously receive your green in the mail a few months later, or receive an interview appointment down the road. If adjusting from any other type of nonimmigrant visa (including B-2, F-1, VWP, J-1, H-1B, O-2, and others) then an interview is mandatory. Q1: My I-485 was approved and I received an email stating card production was ordered, then I received a second identical email. What does this mean? Q2: My I-485 went from post-decision activity backwards into approval. Is something wrong? A: No, both of these are normal and happen all the time. USCIS' approval system seems to generate duplicate notices or reverse notices on a regular basis. It's nothing to worry about. Q: I have further questions not answered here, where should I post them? If adjusting from a K-1 (or K-2) you should post in the "Adjustment of Status From Family-Based Visas" board here: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/7-adjustment-of-status-green-card-from-family-based-visas/ If adjusting from any other type of nonimmigrant visa you should post in the "Adjustment of Status From Work, Student, and Tourist Visas" board here: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/130-adjustment-of-status-from-work-student-tourist-visas/ Q: Thanks for making this FAQ, Hypnos. You're awesome. A: That's not a question. And yes, I am. Thanks to KayDeeCee, Harpa Timsah, Nich-Nick and Kathryn41 for their input and contributions to this FAQ.

It's not for an I-9; it's a requirement from the state of Texas since I'm applying to become a police officer.

There is almost no information out there about obtaining certified copies of your naturalisation certificate, so I thought I would post the information I have here.
 
First, why did I need certified copies when I have the real thing? The answer is my potential employer requires an original certified copy of my naturalisation certificate in part to verify my US citizenship, and so I had no choice but to go and get some.
 
The only way to obtain certified copies is by making an Infopass appointment at your local USCIS office. In light of the new procedure to make an Infopass at many USCIS field offices now (and by all field offices by 30th September, 2019), it's now slightly more complicated since you may not be able to schedule an Infopass yourself any longer, but you can still do it through USCIS' misinformation agents.
 
In my case, I went onto uscis.gov and using the "Ask Emma" tool stated "make Infopass". I was eventually connected to an agent in chat who asked me the reason for needing an Infopass appointment. After being satisfied by my answer, he took my personal information and said that I would be contacted within 48 hours to discuss it further. The next day (a Friday) I was called around noon by another agent, who again asked me the reason for needing an Infopass appointment. I explained, and he was again satisfied. He offered an appointment slot for Monday (so only three days later; a welcome change from the extended wait times under the old system), but I had other business then so he instead offered me Tuesday morning, which I accepted.
 
I arrived a few minutes before my 11:30am appointment, and when I checked in at the desk explained what I needed and why. She said that was fine, and that someone would call my number shortly. Ten minutes later my number was called (the floor was almost completely empty), and I explained to this new officer what I needed and why. She initially questioned why I needed five copies, and I answered that I'm applying to multiple employers who each require their own certified copy, and she said that was fine. I handed over my original naturalisation certificate, together with five photocopies I had made since I assumed she would use mine, but she said she had to make her own. Ten minutes later she came back with the five copies, one of my which I have attached here with my personal information redacted so you can see what it looks like. Basically, they add a certification cover page (G-24) and then the second page is a shrunken copy of the naturalisation certificate with a stamp. Both pages contain raised DHS seals.
 
It was surprisingly easy, and I was in and out in about 30 minutes, which has to be some kind of record when it comes to myself and USCIS. Hopefully this is of use to others, since as I said, there is almost no information available online about this subject.
cert-compressed (1).pdf

Unfortunately there is not much information out there about widow/er AoS or widow/er immigrant visas. I know more about widow/er AoS because I am going through it now myself. Essentially what I can find about immigrant visas is that the embassy receives a completed I-360 and the immigrant visa unit processes it; that's about it.
Immigrant visas and AoS for widow/ers are rare already (which is mostly the reason I decided to put this together in the first place, since it didn't really exist anywhere else). Granted, it only affects a small amount of people (compared to a run-of-the-mill I-130 / I-485 for a husband and wife, which USCIS get literally thousands of every year), but when you're in this situation, the more information you have at hand, the better.
I will put a second draft up sometime tonight, incorporating some minor changes.

Yes, 2:30am Central. I intentionally waited until it was the 3rd everywhere in the continental US. Fat lot of good that did.

There is almost no information out there about obtaining certified copies of your naturalisation certificate, so I thought I would post the information I have here.
 
First, why did I need certified copies when I have the real thing? The answer is my potential employer requires an original certified copy of my naturalisation certificate in part to verify my US citizenship, and so I had no choice but to go and get some.
 
The only way to obtain certified copies is by making an Infopass appointment at your local USCIS office. In light of the new procedure to make an Infopass at many USCIS field offices now (and by all field offices by 30th September, 2019), it's now slightly more complicated since you may not be able to schedule an Infopass yourself any longer, but you can still do it through USCIS' misinformation agents.
 
In my case, I went onto uscis.gov and using the "Ask Emma" tool stated "make Infopass". I was eventually connected to an agent in chat who asked me the reason for needing an Infopass appointment. After being satisfied by my answer, he took my personal information and said that I would be contacted within 48 hours to discuss it further. The next day (a Friday) I was called around noon by another agent, who again asked me the reason for needing an Infopass appointment. I explained, and he was again satisfied. He offered an appointment slot for Monday (so only three days later; a welcome change from the extended wait times under the old system), but I had other business then so he instead offered me Tuesday morning, which I accepted.
 
I arrived a few minutes before my 11:30am appointment, and when I checked in at the desk explained what I needed and why. She said that was fine, and that someone would call my number shortly. Ten minutes later my number was called (the floor was almost completely empty), and I explained to this new officer what I needed and why. She initially questioned why I needed five copies, and I answered that I'm applying to multiple employers who each require their own certified copy, and she said that was fine. I handed over my original naturalisation certificate, together with five photocopies I had made since I assumed she would use mine, but she said she had to make her own. Ten minutes later she came back with the five copies, one of my which I have attached here with my personal information redacted so you can see what it looks like. Basically, they add a certification cover page (G-24) and then the second page is a shrunken copy of the naturalisation certificate with a stamp. Both pages contain raised DHS seals.
 
It was surprisingly easy, and I was in and out in about 30 minutes, which has to be some kind of record when it comes to myself and USCIS. Hopefully this is of use to others, since as I said, there is almost no information available online about this subject.
cert-compressed (1).pdf

So today I get to give the update I have been hoping to give since all of this nonsense began.
 
I received a flurry of text messages from USCIS this afternoon indicating that my case was updated. Puzzled but hopeful, I began to login to my online account, but before I could do so received a call from a Dallas number. They identified themselves as Officer SomebodyOrOther (I forget the name; I recall it wasn't the person who interviewed me) calling from the Dallas field office. They said they had received my case today, and had seen there was an issue. That she had gone ahead and reversed the denial and approved it, and could schedule me for an oath ceremony next Thursday afternoon, on Valentine's Day, if that would be ok. I said that would absolutely, completely, and totally be fine with me. She said she would mail out a copy of the letter today, and that I should receive it soon. I thanked her, and then called the congressional liaison working my case to let her know what had happened.
 
So... there we are. It's been a rough couple of weeks. I lost about 5 lbs the first week, which I can't say I'm unhappy about since I wanted to lose 10-15 lbs before the police academy begins later this year that I will hopefully (now) be attending, but this wasn't how I had planned on doing it.
 
I just want to say that the system works. And by the system I do not mean USCIS. Everyone who has read VJ for more than 5 minutes knows that USCIS is an inefficient and poorly run federal agency in drastic need of an overhaul. No, by system I mean the checks and balances of oversight of them. I'm not sure whether it was my congressman's office or the CIS Ombudsman that got this reversed. I'm choosing to believe a little of both. But to anyone whose naturalisation eligibility date is approaching, I would strongly urge you to wait just a day or two to head this issue off, unless you enjoy uncertainty and stupidity, in which case have at it.
 
My online USCIS account is currently showing no changes. It still indicates that my application is denied, and there's no oath letter there yet. Perhaps it will change, perhaps it won't. But the older case status site is showing my oath letter was mailed.
 
I'm glad to finally be able to put this behind me. Thanks to all the well-wishers here on VJ who have given public and private messages of support. It has been very much appreciated during what has not been a stellar couple of weeks up to now.

So I became an LPR on 3rd April, 2013. This meant that according to USCIS' filing calculator I became eligible to file an N-400 on 3rd January, 2018 (plus five years minus 90 days). I filed my N-400 online through ELIS at 2:30am, staying up late because I was excited to finally begin this final chapter in my immigration journey.
 
I hit an early roadblock when the receipt NoA for some reason assigned me an N-400 priority date of the previous day, 2nd January. The "application received on" date was correct since it said 3rd January. I posted about it here more than once, and the consensus seemed to be that USCIS would honour the "received" date, not the "priority" date.
 
It took a year of waiting (thanks, Dallas backlog) but I eventually got my naturalisation interview scheduled for 14th January of this year. I dutifully attended, answered all questions and passed all the tests, but was told a decision could not be made. Well the decision was made tonight, and a denial notice popped up in my online USCIS account. The reason? I applied too early. The notice stated that I applied on 2nd January, 2018, and was only eligible to file on 3rd January, 2018. Again, this wasn't mentioned at the interview, and I brought all my emailed ELIS receipts and other documents showing I filed on 3rd January in case they ever brought it up, but they didn't.
 
So it's been a fun night. After a brief period of shouting, loudly, I began to move into attack mode.
 
What I have done so far:
 
1) Emailed the CIS Ombudsman giving them the entire story, receipts with timestamps showing I applied on the correct date, and all that jazz. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure the Ombudsman is closed right now as part of the partial federal government shutdown, so I'm not really expecting much out of this immediately.
 
2) I'm going to my Congressman's local office tomorrow to give them the story and all the same documents and seeing if they can intercede with USCIS on my behalf.
 
3) Emailed my old lawyer and another lawyer that helped me back in 2013 to see if they can offer suggestions. Not trying to freeload on them; I offered to pay whatever fee they deem reasonable on this, since it's obviously no longer in DIY territory.
 
4) I'll be contacting the two biggest local newspapers, the Dallas Morning News and the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, to see if they're interested in doing a story on this. I figure the more attention I can get on it the more likely I am to get something done.
 
I also have the option of either filing a fresh application, together with its $725 fee and one year wait time, or an N-336 formal appeal of their decision. Fun fact on the N-336: it costs $700 to file, and you will often wait almost as long as it costs to process a new N-400, so they kinda get you coming and going on that one. I'm not ruling anything out yet, but for now I'm hanging my hat on something from 1-4 getting me somewhere on this.
 
So at the end of the day, anyone intending to file for naturalisation on the day they become eligible: DON'T DO IT. Wait a couple of days, then submit. You will avoid all this bull, and can instead deal with some other USCIS bull that will be unrelated to this.
 
Now it's time to write some letters to newspapers and see if I can get anywhere. I will post replies here as to what happens, if anything meaningful does.

I am sorry for your loss.
 
As stated, you qualify to receive an IW-6 immigrant visa through your wife.
 
I received my green card through being the widower of a US citizen. I also wrote VisaJourney's AoS for widow/er guide on the subject. It's not really aimed at the immigrant visa route, though it's a similar process, just done from overseas.
 
Feel free to PM if you feel the need. This isn't a route that many people have gone through.

I just got back from doing a walk-in biometrics in Fort Worth. It didn't go tremendously.
They almost wouldn't do it when they saw my appointment wasn't until the 23rd. The unpleasant man at the desk asked me who said I could come in early, to which I replied that my attorney advised me to try, and that I had seen people say online that they had done early walk-in appointments at other offices without issue.
If the office was busy I could have understood, but I was literally the only non-employee in the building. There were perhaps 50 chairs for people to wait and all of them were empty. He stood for about 10 seconds thinking about it, then had a detailed conversation with an older woman behind him (by which I mean they stared at each other for another 10 seconds) who eventually just shrugged, and that was all the assent he needed to leap into action.
I was only there perhaps 5 minutes, but he acted like not even both mortgaging my soul and selling my firstborn would be enough to repay him for the galaxy-sized favour he was bestowing upon me by doing it early.
I had trouble writing my signature on the little electronic pad as well, since it was directly against a wall to my right and I am left-handed. It came out a bit messed up and ordinarily I would have asked to do it again, but since I wasn't exactly with Mr. Sunshine I just thought "screw it" and it will have to do.
I guess the moral of the story is, while you can do early walk-in biometrics in Fort Worth, you might want to bring a bar of gold or some precious stones in order to repay them for the enormous service they will do for you by doing it early.

So today I get to give the update I have been hoping to give since all of this nonsense began.
 
I received a flurry of text messages from USCIS this afternoon indicating that my case was updated. Puzzled but hopeful, I began to login to my online account, but before I could do so received a call from a Dallas number. They identified themselves as Officer SomebodyOrOther (I forget the name; I recall it wasn't the person who interviewed me) calling from the Dallas field office. They said they had received my case today, and had seen there was an issue. That she had gone ahead and reversed the denial and approved it, and could schedule me for an oath ceremony next Thursday afternoon, on Valentine's Day, if that would be ok. I said that would absolutely, completely, and totally be fine with me. She said she would mail out a copy of the letter today, and that I should receive it soon. I thanked her, and then called the congressional liaison working my case to let her know what had happened.
 
So... there we are. It's been a rough couple of weeks. I lost about 5 lbs the first week, which I can't say I'm unhappy about since I wanted to lose 10-15 lbs before the police academy begins later this year that I will hopefully (now) be attending, but this wasn't how I had planned on doing it.
 
I just want to say that the system works. And by the system I do not mean USCIS. Everyone who has read VJ for more than 5 minutes knows that USCIS is an inefficient and poorly run federal agency in drastic need of an overhaul. No, by system I mean the checks and balances of oversight of them. I'm not sure whether it was my congressman's office or the CIS Ombudsman that got this reversed. I'm choosing to believe a little of both. But to anyone whose naturalisation eligibility date is approaching, I would strongly urge you to wait just a day or two to head this issue off, unless you enjoy uncertainty and stupidity, in which case have at it.
 
My online USCIS account is currently showing no changes. It still indicates that my application is denied, and there's no oath letter there yet. Perhaps it will change, perhaps it won't. But the older case status site is showing my oath letter was mailed.
 
I'm glad to finally be able to put this behind me. Thanks to all the well-wishers here on VJ who have given public and private messages of support. It has been very much appreciated during what has not been a stellar couple of weeks up to now.

So I became an LPR on 3rd April, 2013. This meant that according to USCIS' filing calculator I became eligible to file an N-400 on 3rd January, 2018 (plus five years minus 90 days). I filed my N-400 online through ELIS at 2:30am, staying up late because I was excited to finally begin this final chapter in my immigration journey.
 
I hit an early roadblock when the receipt NoA for some reason assigned me an N-400 priority date of the previous day, 2nd January. The "application received on" date was correct since it said 3rd January. I posted about it here more than once, and the consensus seemed to be that USCIS would honour the "received" date, not the "priority" date.
 
It took a year of waiting (thanks, Dallas backlog) but I eventually got my naturalisation interview scheduled for 14th January of this year. I dutifully attended, answered all questions and passed all the tests, but was told a decision could not be made. Well the decision was made tonight, and a denial notice popped up in my online USCIS account. The reason? I applied too early. The notice stated that I applied on 2nd January, 2018, and was only eligible to file on 3rd January, 2018. Again, this wasn't mentioned at the interview, and I brought all my emailed ELIS receipts and other documents showing I filed on 3rd January in case they ever brought it up, but they didn't.
 
So it's been a fun night. After a brief period of shouting, loudly, I began to move into attack mode.
 
What I have done so far:
 
1) Emailed the CIS Ombudsman giving them the entire story, receipts with timestamps showing I applied on the correct date, and all that jazz. Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure the Ombudsman is closed right now as part of the partial federal government shutdown, so I'm not really expecting much out of this immediately.
 
2) I'm going to my Congressman's local office tomorrow to give them the story and all the same documents and seeing if they can intercede with USCIS on my behalf.
 
3) Emailed my old lawyer and another lawyer that helped me back in 2013 to see if they can offer suggestions. Not trying to freeload on them; I offered to pay whatever fee they deem reasonable on this, since it's obviously no longer in DIY territory.
 
4) I'll be contacting the two biggest local newspapers, the Dallas Morning News and the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, to see if they're interested in doing a story on this. I figure the more attention I can get on it the more likely I am to get something done.
 
I also have the option of either filing a fresh application, together with its $725 fee and one year wait time, or an N-336 formal appeal of their decision. Fun fact on the N-336: it costs $700 to file, and you will often wait almost as long as it costs to process a new N-400, so they kinda get you coming and going on that one. I'm not ruling anything out yet, but for now I'm hanging my hat on something from 1-4 getting me somewhere on this.
 
So at the end of the day, anyone intending to file for naturalisation on the day they become eligible: DON'T DO IT. Wait a couple of days, then submit. You will avoid all this bull, and can instead deal with some other USCIS bull that will be unrelated to this.
 
Now it's time to write some letters to newspapers and see if I can get anywhere. I will post replies here as to what happens, if anything meaningful does.

As someone who for a decade was out of status and therefore deportable, I thoroughly do not recommend it. Even today I will still have the occasional nightmare about those times. 
 
It was 100% my fault, but I would never put anyone that I purportedly loved through that kind of uncertainty. 

The only things you need are: yourself, the biometrics appointment letter, and a valid photo ID document.

100% wrong.
"Authorised to work" means "authorised to work" - no ifs, buts, or maybes.
https://www.uscis.gov/i-9-central/acceptable-documents/list-documents/form-i-9-acceptable-documents you will note here that an EAD is a "List A" document, meaning it is acceptable for I-9 purposes for both identity verification and employment authorisation. Employers are not permitted to state that they will only accept certain types of documents to demonstrate employment authorisation. The employee selects which documents they wish to show (either one List A document, or one List B and one list C document).
It is considered employment discrimination to require certain documents.
https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/USCIS/Verification/I-9%20Central/Form_I-9_Employee_Information_Sheet.pdf
"7. Which documents do I need to show my employer?
You need to show your employer documents from the “List of Acceptable Documents.” The List is part of Form I-9. You decide which document or documents to show from the List. Your employer cannot ask or require that you show a certain document." (emphasis mine)
OP, you should inform the employer of these requirements (they should know them already).
If you get nowhere with them, I would strongly encourage you to contact the Office of Special Counsel for Immigration-Related Unfair Employment Practices.and inform them that your potential employer is requiring you to have a green card before you can begin employment.
A similar case came up on these forums around a year ago. After contacting this agency, the employer quickly backed down, and offered them the job. It's the law.
The only exception is that certain jobs can require US citizenship. These are typically with local, state, or the federal government. That does not seem to be the case here.

The very easy answer is that not every case is a straightforward one.

A K-1 can obtain an SSN immediately upon entry. They do not need an EAD until fewer than 14 days of validity remain on their I-94, at which point the SSA will require either an EAD or a green card before they will issue a number to a K-1.
 
It's worth noting that a K-2 is not similarly immediately eligible for a SSN, and they always require either an EAD or a green card to be issued a SSN. 

Q1: An I-130 has been filed already. I'm now inside the US, can I file for adjustment of status? Q2: I was visiting my boyfriend / girlfriend and we spontaneously decided to get married. Can I stay and adjust status? A: Provided you did not lie to CBP at PoE or on any previous visa applications (for example: saying you were visiting on business when in fact you were coming to visit a girlfriend / boyfriend / spouse) then, generally yes. It usually goes to intent. You cannot enter the US on a nonimmigrant visa with the preconceived intent to remain and adjust status, but if you enter the US and then change your mind, or your circumstances change, then adjustment of status is an option. It should be noted that intent alone cannot be used to deny an application for adjustment of status if it is the sole negative factor (see Matter of Battista). If you have already filed an I-130 and are now filing an I-485 on top of it, enclose a copy of the I-130 NOA with your adjustment of status packet. Note that your I-130 does not have to have been approved before you can submit an I-485, you can submit an I-485 even if the I-130 is still only pending. Q: On the I-485 part 2, what application type should I select? A: If you are filing an I-130 and I-485 concurrently (or you have already filed an I-130 and are now filing an I-485 to go with it) you should select Option A, because if you read through the brackets it says "attach a copy of the approval notice, or a relative...visa petition filed with this application." A "relative visa petition" = I-130. If you are adjusting from a K-1 (or K-2) and married on or before the 90th day indicated on your I-94 then you should select Option C. Q: I'm adjusting from a K-1 and already had a medical performed overseas within the past year. Do I need to have another medical performed by a civil-surgeon and get an I-693 completed? A: You may or may not. See Nich-Nick's excellent post which explains if you need to have another medical performed: http://www.visajourn...port/?p=6206232 Q: I entered on a K-1 and married within 90 days, but haven't yet filed for adjustment of status. My I-94 has expired, can I still file? A: Yes. When your I-94 expired then your period of authorised stay ended and you became illegally present in the US, incurring overstay. A spouse of a US citizen is an immediate relative though, and as such, overstay does not prevent them from adjusting status. You must only have entered the country legally, not necessarily maintained your nonimmigrant status. As soon as USCIS accept your I-485 for processing then your overstay clocks stops (if you filed after your I-94 expired) and you are placed in a new period of authorised stay which will persist until your I-485 is adjudicated, however long that takes. Q: I'm filing an I-765 with or after my I-485. What eligibility category code should I use?
A: C-9.
Q: I didn't apply for an EAD or AP with my initial AoS application, can I still do so? Is the fee still waived? A: Yes, you can. Complete an I-765 and / or an I-131 and include a copy of the receipt NOA for your I-485 showing that you have paid the I-485 fee and the EAD and AP fees will be waived. Q: My I-485 is still pending, but my AP and / or EAD are about to expire. Can I renew them? Do I need to pay a fee? A: Yes. You should file for a replacement AP and / or EAD 120 days before your current documents will expire, if your I-485 is still pending. Enclose a copy of your I-485 receipt NOA with your renewal applications and your new documents will be processed without charge. Q: Will I have an adjustment of status interview? A: If you're adjusting from a K-1 (or K-2) then accepted thinking indicates you have around a 50-50 chance of actually having an interview. After a month or two you may receive a "Notice of Potential Interview Waiver" in the mail, telling you that your AoS may not need an interview but will take additional months of processing. This notice is not a guarantee that you won't have an interview. You will either just spontaneously receive your green in the mail a few months later, or receive an interview appointment down the road. If adjusting from any other type of nonimmigrant visa (including B-2, F-1, VWP, J-1, H-1B, O-2, and others) then an interview is mandatory. Q1: My I-485 was approved and I received an email stating card production was ordered, then I received a second identical email. What does this mean? Q2: My I-485 went from post-decision activity backwards into approval. Is something wrong? A: No, both of these are normal and happen all the time. USCIS' approval system seems to generate duplicate notices or reverse notices on a regular basis. It's nothing to worry about. Q: I have further questions not answered here, where should I post them? If adjusting from a K-1 (or K-2) you should post in the "Adjustment of Status From Family-Based Visas" board here: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/7-adjustment-of-status-green-card-from-family-based-visas/ If adjusting from any other type of nonimmigrant visa you should post in the "Adjustment of Status From Work, Student, and Tourist Visas" board here: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/130-adjustment-of-status-from-work-student-tourist-visas/ Q: Thanks for making this FAQ, Hypnos. You're awesome. A: That's not a question. And yes, I am. Thanks to KayDeeCee, Harpa Timsah, Nich-Nick and Kathryn41 for their input and contributions to this FAQ.

I am sorry for your loss.
 
As stated, you qualify to receive an IW-6 immigrant visa through your wife.
 
I received my green card through being the widower of a US citizen. I also wrote VisaJourney's AoS for widow/er guide on the subject. It's not really aimed at the immigrant visa route, though it's a similar process, just done from overseas.
 
Feel free to PM if you feel the need. This isn't a route that many people have gone through.

Please mind the TOS.  People are free to post at will.