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Prenup agreement discussion

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Steven-n-Gladys Rookie

Steven-n-Gladys   2

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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Prenup agreement? My Filipina fiancée flipped out when I brought it up.wont even discuss it now. This throws up a huge red flag as we start visa process.Any thoughts?

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sjr09
sjr09

Let's stereotype American women. There are many Filipina women who are scammers, cheats, gold-diggers and liars.That's not my opinion, but something factual.

aaron2020
aaron2020

iMHO. Whether a prenup is a good idea or not is irrelevant. Whether anyone should get one is irrelevant. A prenup may be right for one couple and not another. Every couple should do what they want

together4evr
together4evr

Maybe it threw up a big Red Flag to her that you do not feel you will stay with her forever. maybe she feels it shows your true intentions

Azsara Proficient

Azsara   110

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: United Kingdom
 Timeline
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Prenup agreement? My Filipina fiancée flipped out when I brought it up.wont even discuss it now. This throws up a huge red flag as we start visa process.Any thoughts?

Yea its an interesting subject. I think it can be offensive to someone because it

a) shows your making preparations in the event it doesnt work out and so showing pessimism towards the marriage and/or person before its even started

b) Suggests you may be testing them to see if they still want to marry you knowing they could walk away with nothing.

On the other hand I totally get the rational side of a prenup where so many marriages end in divorce nowadays ANYTHING could happen, even if you think shes gods gift on earth someone may be unfaithful 10 years down the line or other circumstances we cant imagine.

Also if she loved u that much why would it even matter whether theres a prenup or not.

I kinda get both sides of this. Though Im sure for a Filipina theres some cultural offense to be taken at the idea of a prenup too. Maybe someone from this culture can come along and provide insight in this. Personally if my fiancee asked me for a prenup my first thought would be that he doesnt trust me. Even though I know he does, it just kind of annoys me and we'd need to seriously discuss this.

Our Story AoS
[March 2012] Met online on Christian Mingle [November 27th 2013] AoS sent
[June 25th 2012] Met in Person in London!
[August 2012] Steve visits me again in the Uk for our second meeting for just one weekend! [March 6th 2014] AoS Interview - Passed
[september 2012] My first trip to America to visit the love of my life
[November 2012] I travel to America for my first ever thanksgiving with Steves family!
[December 2012] Steve comes to the Uk to spend xmas with my family!
( heart.gif February 15th 2013 heart.gif ) He pops the question in Kensington, London...and I say yes!


K1
[January 15th 2013) I-129f SENT!
[January 24th 2013] NOA1
[July 08th 2013]- NOA2 (approved 165 Days)
[July 18th 2013] Case forwarded to NVC
[July 26th 2013] We call DoS and are finally given our case # - I book medical immediatly

[July 29th 2013] Case forwarded to US Embassy, London
[August 8th 2013] Packet 3 sent (before received)

[August 9th 2013] Packet 3 received
[August 13th 2013] Medical

[August 16th 2013] CEAC updates - London logs my medical results

[August 20th 2013] - CEAC update - London logs my packet 3

[August 23rd 2013] I call DoS and they tell me my interview date, (2 weeks since I sent ds-2001)

[August 27th 2013 CEAC update - London dispatches packet 4]

[August 29th 2013] Packet 4 received
[september 24th 2013] Interview - Refused due to passport and birth certificate condition

[september 26th 2013] Emergency appt at HM Passport Office London - New Passport and Birth Certificate in hand
[september 30th 2013] DX collects passport and birth certificate

[October 3rd] - Docs delivered to Embassy

[October 10th] - London Approves and Issues our Visa!!

[October 16th 2013] 4.00pm - Visa in my hand, 11pm POE -Newark

[October 27th 2013] Wedding wub.png

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together4evr Experienced

together4evr   360

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Egypt
 Timeline
Posted

Maybe it threw up a big Red Flag to her that you do not feel you will stay with her forever. maybe she feels it shows your true intentions

May 24, 2011 NOA1

Sept 11, 2011 NOA2-took 19 days to get case number

Sept 30, 2011 NVC number and IIN received Friday-gotta wait till Monday

Oct 13, 2011 Case Completed- 13 days from receiving case number Took 32 days from NOA2

Nov 30, 2011 Notified of Interview date

January 19, 2012 Interview- 240 days from NOA1

INTERVIEW RESULTS-APPROVED WITH 14 WEEKS AP--but he got his visa in 56 days!!!!!!

PLEASE EDIT YOUR TIMELINE IN YOUR PROFILE SO OTHERS CAN LEARN HOW LONG EACH STEP TAKES IN THIS PROCESS

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Azsara Proficient

Azsara   110

Posted
Filed: AOS (apr) Country: United Kingdom
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I think her reaction was more of a red flag than his proposing the idea but thats just my opinion :blush:

Our Story AoS
[March 2012] Met online on Christian Mingle [November 27th 2013] AoS sent
[June 25th 2012] Met in Person in London!
[August 2012] Steve visits me again in the Uk for our second meeting for just one weekend! [March 6th 2014] AoS Interview - Passed
[september 2012] My first trip to America to visit the love of my life
[November 2012] I travel to America for my first ever thanksgiving with Steves family!
[December 2012] Steve comes to the Uk to spend xmas with my family!
( heart.gif February 15th 2013 heart.gif ) He pops the question in Kensington, London...and I say yes!


K1
[January 15th 2013) I-129f SENT!
[January 24th 2013] NOA1
[July 08th 2013]- NOA2 (approved 165 Days)
[July 18th 2013] Case forwarded to NVC
[July 26th 2013] We call DoS and are finally given our case # - I book medical immediatly

[July 29th 2013] Case forwarded to US Embassy, London
[August 8th 2013] Packet 3 sent (before received)

[August 9th 2013] Packet 3 received
[August 13th 2013] Medical

[August 16th 2013] CEAC updates - London logs my medical results

[August 20th 2013] - CEAC update - London logs my packet 3

[August 23rd 2013] I call DoS and they tell me my interview date, (2 weeks since I sent ds-2001)

[August 27th 2013 CEAC update - London dispatches packet 4]

[August 29th 2013] Packet 4 received
[september 24th 2013] Interview - Refused due to passport and birth certificate condition

[september 26th 2013] Emergency appt at HM Passport Office London - New Passport and Birth Certificate in hand
[september 30th 2013] DX collects passport and birth certificate

[October 3rd] - Docs delivered to Embassy

[October 10th] - London Approves and Issues our Visa!!

[October 16th 2013] 4.00pm - Visa in my hand, 11pm POE -Newark

[October 27th 2013] Wedding wub.png

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Tintin and Mike Experienced

Tintin and Mike   127

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Philippines
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Also if she loved u that much why would it even matter whether theres a prenup or not.

:thumbs: :thumbs:

K1
05/22/12 - Mailed I-129F
08/17/12 - Approved I-129F NOA2 (85 days)
11/19/12 - Approved Visa!! (179 days)
12/01/12 - POE Honolulu, HI
12/21/12 - Wedding Day!
AOS, EAD and AP
01/05/13 - Mailed I-485, I-765 and I-131
01/09/13 - USCIS accepted case and received text
01/11/13 - Cashed check
01/08/13 - Received NOA1
01/18/13 - Received Biometrics Appointment Notice
01/22/13 - Early Biometrics Walk-in (scheduled Feb 7)
01/27/13 - We're pregnant!!
02/04/13 - Received Appointment Notice
03/04/13 - Approved EAD and AP (58 days)
03/12/13 - Received EAD and AP combo card
03/12/13 - Interview and Approved GC (63 days)
03/20/13 - Received Green Card

10/3/13 - Baby #1 arrived

2/17/14 - Pregnant again! LOL

10/20/14 - Baby #2 arrived
ROC
01/09/15 - Mailed I-751

01/12/15 - NOA

01/16/15 - Received NOA Letter

01/20/15 - Mailed DMV 1yr Extension

02/05/15 - Received Biometrics Letter

02/09/15 - Early Bio (Walk-IN)

02/19/15 - Biometrics Appointment

06/15/15 - Approved
06/15/15 - Card Ordered and Mailed

08/22/15 - Card Received

N-400 on or after 12/15/15



and they'll live happily ever, ever after...
Relationship Journey: Our pursuit to happiness

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N-o-l-a Grand Master

N-o-l-a   7,167

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Denmark
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To me it would be a red flag. I brought it up to my husband when we were thinking of doing the K1 and he said "Sure, why not? We aren't ever going to get divorced anyway."

3/2/18  E-filed N-400 under 5 year rule

3/26/18 Biometrics

7/2019-12/2019 (Yes, 16- 21 months) Estimated time to interview MSP office.

 

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LSnBigBear Rising Star

LSnBigBear   61

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Philippines
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I agree with others that her reaction is not what anyone would like to hear in this instance. I would ask yourself a few questions before proceeding on. How well do you know her?? How much time have you spent with her? Does she have skills that will enable her to work in the USA and make it in the event down the road your marriage ended? As a lot of us mentioned in other posts pertaining to this topic. No pre-nup is normally granted 100% as written if written just one way with other party not receiving anything. Unless divorce happens within the first year of marriage is the exception. I would step back and take a pause on this to see if she comes around. Filipinas are normally reactionary people and are quick to think the worst (i/e you are considering a divorce topic) and become upset. Let it settle down for a bit and then discuss it again more opennly. If her pattern continues you may see a side you do not like and then your answer is there to make the decision to continue.

I know when I have discussed plans for my death as I am 23 years older than my fiancee she just closes up and yells at me not to discuss me dying. I just waited her out so she understood my life insurance etc. She still dispises addressing this so maybe on your fiancee's side it is just her way of reacting similar to mine and death. How is that for circling the wagon :rofl:

Good luck..

Shawn (Bigbear)

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sjr09 Experienced

sjr09   155

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Philippines
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:thumbs: :thumbs:

:thumbs:

'PAU' both wife and daughter in the U.S. 08/25/2009

Daughter's' CRBA Manila Embassy 08/07/2008 dual citizenship

http://crbausembassy....wordpress.com/

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SAT Grand Master

SAT   9,609

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Malaysia
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Prenup agreement? My Filipina fiancée flipped out when I brought it up.wont even discuss it now. This throws up a huge red flag as we start visa process.Any thoughts?

Do you have a lot to lose if it doesn't work out? And are you willing to take that kind of a loss?

Like auto insurance, full coverage? Or just liability?

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sjr09 Experienced

sjr09   155

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Philippines
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pu8KFlfzk3Y&feature=player_detailpage

'PAU' both wife and daughter in the U.S. 08/25/2009

Daughter's' CRBA Manila Embassy 08/07/2008 dual citizenship

http://crbausembassy....wordpress.com/

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Steven-n-Gladys Rookie

Steven-n-Gladys   2

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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I dont have a lot of money at all...I do and did trust her....but like i said a huge red flag to me...especially to not even discuss it....but i have my reasons to think about bringing it up to her...previously married so i have experienced it...and it is worst thing on earth.I know she is taking a big risk to come here with her son ,but im taking a big risk too,and have invested hugely in time,money and emotionally.I know its not an easy topic,but thought it was best to talk with her about it BEFORE starting the visa...prevent...i seriously think it is best of me to disscuss now then when she comes here so she can decide for herself what to do.

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Steven-n-Gladys Rookie

Steven-n-Gladys   2

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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Do you have a lot to lose if it doesn't work out? And are you willing to take that kind of a loss?

Like auto insurance, full coverage? Or just liability?

Just time and emotionally...seriously just average wagearner here...maybe a little better than average...like 45k a year...I see it as insurance,u dont buy insurance hoping you will use it...but just in case something does...u have some protection...I was previously married so i know what CAN happen in a divorce..not that it will happen

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Enigma11561 Proficient

Enigma11561   336

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Belarus
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My two cents. If you have deep pockets, and a lot to lose, I would go with a prenup. If you have little in the way of assets, then its a toss up. She should understand that a prenup can actually protect her in that you can write out a specific set of circumstances that gives her financial stability. As an example..going the distance here, Donald Trump with no prenup would have lost half his fortune. With a prenup only about 50 million.If she does not even want to listen, then I would consider thinking about what your future may hold.

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darkangel1215 Community Regular

darkangel1215   4

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (pnd) Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted

This is my opinion,

I am Filipina, It is an insult for me if my future husband will tell me that.. It is not our TRADITION or CUSTOM to have a Prenup. My husband and I dont have prenup, When I got here, I work. I assured him if things dont work for us, I would rather send back home. I told him He dont need to worry of me taking of what he owns. Filipina and American Women are different! I assured you that! So dont you worry about it..

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