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MY FIANCE IS READY TO GO HOME

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Hoping he gets over it soon. It's something different for our men and some just can't deal/handle with all the changes, laws,rules etc etc. And some people just can't be without there family back home. Give it time and see how it plays out.

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MY FIANCE IS READY TO GO HOME AND WE HAVE NOT EVEN GOT MARRIED... ALL THIS WAIT AND EFFORT FOR NOTHING!

OMG mama!! I'm sorry to hear that.... Have hope don't get discourage and try giving him a little bit of space, as adjusting to a new life is hard, he is probably a little homesick. Give some time, try and talk to him calmly and letting him know you understand it is a hard but that this is something you guys wanted, See how you guy can just go into a court house(city hall) get married and try to file for his status... As you know if he leave he won't be able to come back and you will have to start all over again. I really do hope you guys can work something out.... It's kind of heartbreaking to hear stories like this when we only know all the time and effort we put into this process but again, only they know how difficult it is on there part, and being away from there homelands... at least we get to travel anywhere and its "normal" for us, but this is a totally new experiences for him.

Hope things can play out well this is a tough decision! :wacko::crying:

Edited by GodsGift225

~* GodsGift225*~

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MY FIANCE IS READY TO GO HOME AND WE HAVE NOT EVEN GOT MARRIED... ALL THIS WAIT AND EFFORT FOR NOTHING!

I'm very sorry to know you guys are going through a tough time, it's very hard for everyone, the petitioner and the beneficiary adjusting to a new life. I must say that my husband and I have had very rough times, and even tried to send him out myself, but thank God with time and patience we have been working on our relationship and things have gotten better. It takes time and alot of communication to get through this hard adjusting period. Especially if he's not working or doesn't have a driver's license (in other words feel like they depend on us woman). I'm not sure what your situation is like, but like GodsGift225 said, you have to really sit down and make sure this is something you both want. Nobody has it easy and I know sometimes we tend to feel even more frustrated because we have put so much effort in this and we feel like is not enough for them. So don't feel like all the wait and effort was for nothing, I'm sure he's very grateful and in love, just sometimes the adjustment doesn't sit well with alot of people, being away from home, especially in this cold weather and not sitting outside drinking a beer. A little bit of space and meditating is needed. Maybe a night out just for the two of you outside of the home, as a couple, the way it was in DR with no worries and no fights. Remind each other of the great times you both had in DR and how things can be the same way, just with more responsabilities. It has helped my relationship alot, and we're both at peace with each other. Wish you the best and never give up! You have came very far to accomplish where you are at now.

Edited by perez525

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I'm sorry to hear that. My wife has said she wants to go home many many times, but never before we were married. She's been here since September of 2011, and she still gets homesick and wants to return. Although it has gotten much better than it used to be, that feeling is still there. Unlike how many Americans think, that everyone outside the USA and, particularly from third world countries, are dieing to get into the USA, my wife never wanted to leave her homeland. It is only because of our relationship that she agreed to move to the USA, and that was not an easy agreement to get from her.

Give him time and support, and maybe he can work through this. His comment of wanting to return home may have more to do with the pain he is feeling from homesickness than a true desire to leave you. Its not an easy ride having a homesick spouse, but if we love that person, do we have any choice but to take it? Good luck to you, and I hope you can work through this.


K1 from the Philippines
Arrival : 2011-09-08
Married : 2011-10-15
AOS
Date Card Received : 2012-07-13
EAD
Date Card Received : 2012-02-04

Sent ROC : 4-1-2014
Noa1 : 4-2-2014
Bio Complete : 4-18-2014
Approved : 6-24-2014

N-400 sent 2-13-2016
Bio Complete 3-14-2016
Interview
Oath Taking

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I'm very sorry to know you guys are going through a tough time, it's very hard for everyone, the petitioner and the beneficiary adjusting to a new life. I must say that my husband and I have had very rough times, and even tried to send him out myself, but thank God with time and patience we have been working on our relationship and things have gotten better. It takes time and alot of communication to get through this hard adjusting period. Especially if he's not working or doesn't have a driver's license (in other words feel like they depend on us woman). I'm not sure what your situation is like, but like GodsGift225 said, you have to really sit down and make sure this is something you both want. Nobody has it easy and I know sometimes we tend to feel even more frustrated because we have put so much effort in this and we feel like is not enough for them. So don't feel like all the wait and effort was for nothing, I'm sure he's very grateful and in love, just sometimes the adjustment doesn't sit well with alot of people, being away from home, especially in this cold weather and not sitting outside drinking a beer. A little bit of space and meditating is needed. Maybe a night out just for the two of you outside of the home, as a couple, the way it was in DR with no worries and no fights. Remind each other of the great times you both had in DR and how things can be the same way, just with more responsabilities. It has helped my relationship alot, and we're both at peace with each other. Wish you the best and never give up! You have came very far to accomplish where you are at now.

:thumbs:


~* GodsGift225*~

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We went through that when I moved to Denmark. I really was sure for a time that our relationship wouldn't make it, but to be honest with you - I found the problem was certainly with Denmark and not my husband, so we filed to move back to America. Sometimes people really aren't cut out for living in other places and a K1 is a hard visa path for a man, not being able to legally work or really be independent for the first few months.


3/2/18  E-filed N-400 under 5 year rule

3/26/18 Biometrics

7/2019-12/2019 (Yes, 16- 21 months) Estimated time to interview MSP office.

 

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homesick?sad.gif


j0395718.gif My K1 Journey

12/10/12 Mailed k1 petition

01/2/13 NOA1 Hardcopy (no email)

07/1/13 NOA2 ( no RFE )

07/18/13 Casefile shipped to DOS

07/26/13 Manila case no.

07/30/13 NVC shipped to usembssy

08/15/13 Medica PASSED:) yeheyy

09/03/13 Interview APPROVED ( agegap 27years )

09/08/13 VISA ON HAND

LOVE.gifLOVE.gifLOVE.gifaniheartpinknwhite.gif

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I would suggest talking to your fiance to see where your relationship is headed. If it's solid, then you can still get married and do AP so that when that is approved, you guys can make a trip to his homeland ASAP, in the mean time, seek out fellow Dominicans, like restaurants, groceries, having social support really helps people who find themselves suddenly in a strange land! Good luck to you guys!!


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MY FIANCE IS READY TO GO HOME AND WE HAVE NOT EVEN GOT MARRIED... ALL THIS WAIT AND EFFORT FOR NOTHING!

Obviously you didn't prepare them well enough for the transition. Maybe let them go back and work further on the relationship and the transition and then try again?


Phil (Lockport, near Chicago) and Alla (Lobnya, near Moscow)

As of Dec 7, 2009, now Zero miles apart (literally)!

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Moved from K1 Process & Procedures to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits forum.


Our journey:

Spoiler

September 2007: Met online via social networking site (MySpace); began exchanging messages.
March 26, 2009: We become a couple!
September 10, 2009: Arrived for first meeting in-person!
June 17, 2010: Arrived for second in-person meeting and start of travel together to other areas of China!
June 21, 2010: Engaged!!!
September 1, 2010: Switched course from K1 to CR-1
December 8, 2010: Wedding date set; it will be on February 18, 2011!
February 9, 2011: Depart for China
February 11, 2011: Registered for marriage in Wuhan, officially married!!!
February 18, 2011: Wedding ceremony in Shiyan!!!
April 22, 2011: Mailed I-130 to Chicago
April 28, 2011: Received NOA1 via text/email, file routed to CSC (priority date April 25th)
April 29, 2011: Updated
May 3, 2011: Received NOA1 hardcopy in mail
July 26, 2011: Received NOA2 via text/email!!!
July 30, 2011: Received NOA2 hardcopy in mail
August 8, 2011: NVC received file
September 1, 2011: NVC case number assigned
September 2, 2011: AOS invoice received, OPTIN email for EP sent
September 7, 2011: Paid AOS bill (payment portal showed PAID on September 9, 2011)
September 8, 2011: OPTIN email accepted, GZO number assigned
September 10, 2011: Emailed AOS package
September 12, 2011: IV bill invoiced
September 13, 2011: Paid IV bill (payment portal showed PAID on September 14, 2011)
September 14, 2011: Emailed IV package
October 3, 2011: Emailed checklist response (checklist generated due to typo on Form DS-230)
October 6, 2011: Case complete at NVC
November 10, 2011: Interview - APPROVED!!!
December 7, 2011: POE - Sea-Tac Airport

September 17, 2013: Mailed I-751 to CSC

September 23, 2013: Received NOA1 in mail (receipt date September 19th)

October 16, 2013: Biometrics Appointment

January 28, 2014: Production of new Green Card ordered

February 3, 2014: New Green Card received; done with USCIS until fall of 2023*

 

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MAybe think of the consequences of leaving right now. The only path - if you were to change your mind after leaving - would be the CR1. NO tourist visa to the US meanwhile with a past K1 visa, atleast for most.

Your timeline indicates it's less than 3 months since POE. I admit, the first many months were THE most horrible to me. Of course we enjoyed each other and being reunited but it was hard walking around for 10 hours a day awake without rnning into one single person I had known or once knew. You know, randomly running into someone or recognizing someone, or just the area. Basically, your fiance is flat-bound. My husband was flabbergasted when I became sad over him showing me places he used to fish, go shotting/dirtbike riding as a kid. I was sad because I couldn't show the same to him. It does get better but take just as much patience as it did going through the process in different countries. And it's loads of patience and support from you as well as from him. It helped alot when I started working and sloooowly saving up for a trip to home country. Still saving.. If ya think USCIS is slow, wait until you start a job minimum wage. Have you though about setting up a joint bank account, like a saving account where you start putting money into and he follows up when getting a job? It's a neat way of seeing some sort of progress towards visiting home country and not feel stuck going nowhere.

You call him "fiance" so it indicates you are still engaged?


K1 process, October 2010 > POE, July 2011

I-129F approved in 180 days from NOA1 date. (195 days from filing to NOA2 in hand)

Interview took 224 days from I-129F NOA1 date. (241 days from filing petition until visa in hand)

From filing I-129F petition until POE: 285 days

Click timeline or "about me" for all details.

AOS process, December 2011 > July 2012

EAD/AP Approval took 51 days from NOA1 date to email update. (77 days from filing until EAD/AP in hand)

AOS Approval took 206 days from NOA1 date to email update. (231 days from filing until greencard in hand)

From filing I-129F petition until greencard in hand: 655 days

Click timeline or "about me" for all details.

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MY FIANCE IS READY TO GO HOME AND WE HAVE NOT EVEN GOT MARRIED... ALL THIS WAIT AND EFFORT FOR NOTHING!

This is my biggest fear bc this happened to me when I moved to Chile. I cried almost everyday for a month straight and we almost broke up several times. The way we worked through it was talking and realizing what we both really wanted. In the end it turned out we wanted to be together. Lalo and I have talked a lot about him moving here and he's decided he's going to give it at least a year to adjust and if he hates it then we will decided where we want to move. If the relationship is strong get married and file for AOS asap so he can go visit his home country soon. Plus once having a job he will feel better. If he plays any sports enroll him into those types of activities so he can meet some friends. Try keeping him active and I don't mean just with you. He needs to have friends or other ppl to be able to hang out with. When I was in Chile and all I had was my fiance it was really hard on me but when I started working and met a few friends I felt a lot better. I really think that he is just home sick and will feel better once he has something to do.

Good luck!


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Removal of Conditions
08/25/2015: I-751 Sent 08/28/2015: I-751 Delivered

09/04/2015: NOA1 Received 09/25/2015: Biometrics Appointment
TBA: Interview Appointment TBA: Removal of Conditions Approved

AOS
06/11/2013: I-485 & I-765 Sent
06/13/2013: NOA1 Received (AOS & EAD)
07/11/2013: Biometrics Appointment 08/15/2013: EAD Approved
08/26/2013: EAD Card Received 09/16/2013: Interview Waived Letter Received
11/20/2013: AOS Approved

K-1
06/21/2012: I-129F Sent 06/27/2012: I-129F NOA1

12/21/2012: NVC Received 12/28/2012: NVC Left
01/07/2013: Consulate Received 02/27/2013: Interview Date

03/05/2013: Visa Received 03/15/2013: US Entry

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